Few things get Old North Church quiet. Explosions can't quite cut it, given Tom's constant experimentation, arguments lack the flare they used to, and the firing range is only a few yards away from the common area, so people get used to ignoring things.
But Allen's last words before falling asleep again, shocked the Railroad quiet.
"I think I forgot to celebrate Christmas."
Its impact was lessened over the next day or so when Allen would drift in and out of consciousness, always with a weird comment. "I know I shouldn't be able to dodge a plasma shot but I did," was Glory's favorite.
Eventually, Allen regained his clarity, and he found himself chatting with Piper.
"I was worried about you." Piper commented, reaching out to clasp Allen's hand.
"I don't die easy," he bragged, fluffing his pillow. Piper sighed, grimaced, and clenched her eyes shut.
"No," she finally got out, "You don't."
"Why did that look like that hurt to say?" Allen asked, trying to be cute, which was not his specialty.
"I need to apologize." Piper finally admitted, Allen was visibly thrown by Piper's confession, shaking his head and pulling back.
"What for?"
"For so many things," Piper started, "But mostly for not believing in you."
"I don't…" Allen paused, seeming to taste each word. "…Understand," he finally settled.
"Remember our first big adventure?"
"Which one?" Allen requested, "Cause, full disclosure, I remember, maybe every other hour from my interview to passing out in Amari's office." Piper gave Allen a bemused look. "Mentats are a hell of a drug," he clarified.
"I meant the Silver Shroud job," she reminded him.
"Vividly." Allen allowed, nodding "Why do you ask?"
"Well, what do you remember?" Piper asked. "How do you remember it?"
Allen shifted beneath his cover, and squinted up at the ceiling of old North Church like it had a script written on it.
"I remember calling Whitechapel a lot of nicknames," He gave a half chuckle at the memory, "I remember putting the fear of God into anyone that met me." Allen poked at the Fedora on Piper's head, "I remember giving you that hat."
"Well," Piper refuted, finally getting to the heart of the matter, "I remember you being a hero, saving lives and taking down bad guys, and I got caught up in the whimsy of it all."
"That sounds like believing in me too much." Allen mused, receiving a light slap on the arm from Piper.
"Let me finish," She demanded.
"Fine, fine," Allen mock cowered behind the hand that wasn't holding Piper's.
"You seemed invincible, and for the month after that, doing job after job with the Minutemen, retaking the Castle, the artillery." Piper smiled happily at the memories. "I got lost in your heroics," she sobered up, grimacing a little, "When the Brotherhood showed up, and you did what you did, said what you said, it shocked me. Showed me how easily you lied." She was quiet for a full 30 seconds, "It scared me, I started to wonder if what I had seen so far was a lie, if the hero I'd seen was just an act."
"You weren't wrong" Allen comforted, "I almost got myself killed a lot at first."
"But you were always okay!" Piper exclaimed, "You always came back, you always lived. The other day Curie and I thought we were rescuing you!" She explained, leaning back and took her hat off, staring into it, "But even then, you ended up saving my ass." Piper put her hat back on and looked to Allen. "So… I'm sorry, for every time I ever doubted you, for every time I expected you to be something so much more than you were."
Allen reached up and patted Piper's shoulder.
"You never have to apologize to me."
The duo sat in more than comfortable silence for about a minute, before Allen broke it.
"The other day?" This had actually been bugging him for a little bit, "How long was I out?"
"You drifted in and out for about a day."
"Did I do that thing where I wake up, say something weird, and fall back asleep?" Allen asked.
"Yes, actually."
"Damn," Allen grunted, "Thought I kicked that."
"That's happened to you before?"
"Every now and again," Allen responded, shrugging, "Nora though it was hilarious"
"Really?" Piper demanded, disbelieving.
"Tough old girl was unflappable," Allen chuckled, "I don't think I've ever really seen her panic."
"Sounds like the perfect match for you." Piper observed, smiling at Allen.
"Aw, hell no." Allen laughed, laying back on his pillow and closing his eyes "I suppress my fear, Nora was fearless."
"Still sounds like the perfect match," Piper said.
"Yeah," Allen agreed, opening his eyes, "we kinda were." He sat up a little straighter, "She brought out the best me."
"How's that?"
"Still don't know." Allen scratched the back of his head. "As cliché as it sounds, she just knew me better than most, which says something given all the secrets I kept." He fidgeted, taking his hand from Piper and rubbing his own two together, "She kept me grounded, gave me a future. I may seem like I've got my head on straight but that wasn't always the case. I had my bad days," Allen closed his eyes, "But she kept me home, helped me find my way." Allen started shaking his head rhythmically - shake twice, blink, repeat. "Even when the bombs were falling she kept me grounded"
We heard about it on the news first, Nora grabbed Shaun, I grabbed a gun. It's a good thing she was there, because I pointed it at anyone that came too close.
Shake twice, blink.
We finally made it the Vault and damn if I wasn't in pieces, I was still pointing that gun, threatened the goddamn Overseer. Security almost had to take me down. But her arm was on mine, couldn't pull that trigger if I wanted too.
Allen wrapped himself in his arms.
shake twice, blink.
They called the cryo pods 'decontamination chambers.' Shaun was crying, I was in shock. But Nora was talking, "Don't be scared, Papa's right there. Papa's right there." And there I was. Back to reality.
Piper wondered if she should stop him, it was like she wasn't there.
Shake twice, blink.
"I'm here" I told them, "I'm here. We'll be okay. We're safe." I got in the pod and it got cold, way too cold. Next thing I know I hear voices, "This one. Let him go, I'm only going to tell you once." They'd taken my gun earlier, I couldn't shoot the glass.
Shake twice, blink.
I didn't hear the hammer cock, but I heard the shot.
With one fierce shake of his head, Allen seemed to snap back to reality.
"Sorry." He apologized quickly, "That also happened from time to time." Piper opened her mouth to say something but she was cut off, "Forget about it, alright," Allen begged her, "And can I get some space?" He turned away, onto his side. "I need...I just… I need some sleep."
Allen seemed to fall quickly into a slumber. Piper walked away, accidentally bumping into Deacon as she went.
"Sorry," she said quickly.
"No biggie," Deacon waved her off, "You alright?"
"Yeah," Piper said, adopting the most casual tone possible "Why?"
"You're crying." Deacon pointed out. Piper quickly dried her tears.
"It's personal."
"The Operative alright?" Deacon checked.
"He's having a bad day."
The pair of them looked over to their friend.
"I guess even he has a few of those."
"I guess."