Chapter 10: Janet Wakes Up
Eddie woke up the next morning, groggy, eyes red from crying. He tried to tell himself that it was just a dream and that Janet was fine, but he knew it wasn't. Janet had been hurt in the vilest way possible and it was all his fault. He needed to get out of the house. He contemplated going back to the hospital but he felt that Janet probably wouldn't want him there, no matter how much Hannah argued to the contrary.
Eddie got up and without getting dressed, walked down to the kitchen. Phil was there, making pancakes. The smell assaulted him, reminding him of good mornings past when he, Janet, Phil, and Pizza girl would get together for Saturday morning breakfast. Those days were long gone now, he was afraid.
Phil looked up from the stove, sympathy in his eyes. "Hey, man. How's Janet?"
"Not good. She was still unconsciousness when I left and Hannah hasn't called since, so…" Eddie trailed off, unable to talk about it anymore. He felt like his heart was going to burst and he knew that he had never felt pain like this before; not when Nick left, not when his parents died, not even when Janet had told him she slept with Rooster. Nothing could compare to the fact that Janet was hurt and might never be the same.
Phil walked over to Eddie and put his hand on his shoulder. "Hey, if you need to talk, you know I'm here, right?"
Eddie nodded. "Yeah, just-just not now. I'm gonna go for a walk." Eddie went back upstairs to get dressed and ten minutes later, he was out on the streets walking aimlessly on the sidewalk. He wasn't sure where to go, just that he needed to walk. He needed to do something, like break something or someone. As if someone heard his desires, he ended up walking right up to Big Cat's office. Through the windows he saw Matt Lausch cleaning out his desk. Anger and hatred flowed through Eddie and he ran into the building.
Lausch saw Eddie coming but didn't make it away in time. Much like the Eddie had done with Big Cat the previous night, he slammed Lausch into the wall. "Did you do that to her?" Unlike last night, he wasn't yelling. The question came out in a deadly whisper that sent chills down Lausch's spine.
"Do what? To who?"
Eddie pushed him tighter to the wall. "Janet was found attacked last night. Raped. I know you hate me and would take it out on anyone. So did you hurt her?"
Lausch knew he should try to placate the man before he got killed but his pride wouldn't let him back down. "Janet the Planet? Now why would I do that? I don't want your sloppy seconds. Or should I say thirds? I mean, I did hear Rooster got his turn with her."
Eddie's jaw clenched and for the first time in his life he knew what it was like to want someone dead. It may have happened too if the door hadn't burst open then. "Eddie, Eddie! Man, let him go. We got this." Eddie barely registered the voice until he felt two pairs of arms pull him away.
Steve hated this. He had dealt with a few sexual assaults before, what with the Ridge being a college town, but it had never involved people he knew before. Steve stepped in between Lausch and Eddie and tried to talk his friend down. "Listen, you don't need to do this. We got an anonymous tip and we're taking him in. Ok?" Eddie only eased up when he saw the cops that had pulled him off walk over to Lausch and handcuff him. "I just got a call. Janet's awake." Eddie's head snapped up at that. "You should go see her."
Eddie nodded and left quickly, ignoring the sounds of Lausch's protests. The only thought on his mind was getting to the woman he loved.
Back at the hospital, Janet was trying to stay awake. She felt so tired and even though she had technically been asleep for hours and hours, she felt like she needed more. The doctor and Hannah were in her room and he announced that the prognosis was good. She had a concussion, but that was the only major injury. They had never seen anyone bounce back so fast, and he said she was very lucky. He told her she needed to stay for a couple more days but could go home at the end of the week.
After he left the room, Hannah sat back down beside the bed. "You had us all worried, honey."
"Sorry," she whispered. Her throat was sore from where her assailant grabbed her, but it was fading the more she talked. "I can't believe this. I never thought anything like this could happen to me, you know?"
"Yeah, but you're safe now." She started to say more when she noticed that Janet's attention was focused on the door. She turned her head and saw Eddie in the doorway. She smiled and turned back to Janet. "I'm gonna go see if it's ok if you eat something. I'll be back." Hannah left the room but the other two barely noticed.
Eddie slowly walked in and sat in Hannah's chair. "Hi." He didn't really know what to say. 'Are you ok?' was a stupid question and proclaiming his undying love to her seemed like a really bad move right then.
"Hi. I'm surprised you're here." Janet really didn't want to bring up the other night, but she wasn't sure what to do. She didn't want Eddie here out of pity no matter how good it was to see him.
"Yeah, I know. Janet, I'm sorry. I never should have left like that. It was stupid and selfish. You were just telling me how you felt that night and I didn't want to hear it. I was wrong. I'm so sorry."
Janet's eyes welled up but she refused to feel any hope. "You had every right to be mad. Still do. This," she gestured to herself, "doesn't change anything. You still have a right to hate me."
"You're right, I do have a right to hate you and this shouldn't change anything. But the thing is, Janet, it does. Because you're sitting here, hurt and bruised and battered and you're still the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. And for the life of me, I can't seem to find that anger I have been trying so hard to hold onto these past few months. And it's not because you're here. I mean, I knew the moment I walked out of your house that what my problem was."
"What was your problem, Eddie?" Janet braced herself. This conversation was so similar to the one they had in Sully's, what seemed like a lifetime ago. She didn't dare hope that it would end the same way, though.
"My problem was that, I was angry at myself. Still mad at you, sure, but madder at myself because I wanted to forgive you. My mind was saying that I should hate and punish you forever, but my heart was already on its way to letting you back in. I was fighting so hard against that, that I just couldn't admit to myself that I already had. And I do, I forgive you. I know it's a little too late, but there it is."
Janet started to cry. These words were what she had been dreaming of hearing for months and she couldn't enjoy them. She still loved Eddie but everything had changed now, despite her telling him it hadn't.
Eddie hated to see her cry, especially knowing that they weren't happy tears. "Oh, Janet, please don't cry." He reached out to take her hand, but she flinched and quickly pulled it away. Hurt flashed across his eyes, but he pushed it aside. He knew she wasn't afraid of him, but after what she had been through, it was going to be awhile before she let any man touch her.
"I'm sorry, it's not you." Janet wiped the tears from her face. "I just—I just can't forget—" Sobs overcame her body and Eddie had never felt so helpless. He wanted nothing more than to wrap her up in his arms and never let her go, but he knew that wasn't an option anymore.
Hannah had been waiting outside, far enough away that she didn't hear their conversation but close enough that she did hear her friend's gut-wrenching sobs. She ran into the room and pushed passed Eddie who looked like he had been about to leave and get help. She climbed onto the bed and pulled Janet into her arms. Eddie stammered something about leaving them alone and then walked out. Hannah just held her friend tight, rocking her gently like she used to do with Sam when he had nightmares and wished with all her might that she could take Janet's pain away.
Twenty minutes later, Janet had calmed down and was drinking some water the nurse had brought her. Hannah hadn't pressed her for information about her conversation with Eddie; she knew Janet would tell her when she was ready. They were just starting to talk about how Janet was going to stay with Hannah when she got out of the hospital when two policemen walked into the room.
"Ms. Meadow? We have a few questions if you're feeling up to it."
Hannah was about to protest, when Janet squeezed her hand. "It's ok as long as Hannah can stay?" The policewoman gave her a nod and so Janet began. Hannah held her hand tightly and fought back tears as she listened to her friend recount the most horrific thing that had ever happened to her. Suddenly all Hannah's problems seemed so insignificant and all the pain she had caused so stupid. Hannah vowed then and there to be a better friend and to do whatever it took to make things right in her world. She was pulled out of her thoughts by Janet saying Lausch's name.
"He whispered in my ear, 'You tell Latekka this is what happens when he messes with the wrong people.' I didn't see his face but I know that voice. It was Matt Lausch."
The officer nodded. "He was arrested earlier. We got a tip saying he was the man who attacked you. The doctor's got some DNA evidence from your initial exam so it shouldn't be that hard to compare it. I think we have all we need. We'll stop by if we need anything else." The two officers left, leaving Janet shivering on the bed. Hannah held her close and told her to try and rest. As she watched Janet doze off, she swore that she would no longer take what Ray said at face value. She new how close he and Matt were and if she found out he had anything to do with this, Eddie would be the least of his problems.
TBC…