Okay, I have a plan – it's going to take around another 10 chapters after this one and hopefully it won't be another four years before I finish it. Please stay with me, I've never finished writing a story before and I want all of you to be the first to witness it!

Please correct me on any spelling or grammar mistakes as I've literally posted these as I finished them…

Love to everyone reading this, and even more so if you were here four years ago and have returned!

Scorpius

The boys had suggested a night at the Hogs Head might shake me out of the mood I'd been in all week but I had my doubts, nevertheless I went - thankful for the momentary distraction. There was a band playing when we entered and I appreciated the loud constant hum of music through my head because it left room for little else. I went to the bar with Al to order a round of butterbeers to start our boy's night out whilst Peter and Tristan went to find us all a table somewhere. The pub was full of students, the majority fifth year and over, but I could see a group of three third year girls at a table, eyes glued to the lead singer of the band whilst he played a particularly over-the-top guitar solo.

I sighed and turned back to Al at the bar, feeling the weight of age on my shoulders even though I was only two years older than the girls. I could still remember the first time we'd all come into the Hogs Head, 13 and convinced that we were all the height of maturity coming into a pub unaccompanied. Al and I carried two mugs of butterbeer in silence over to where the other boys had found a table. He'd asked me what was going on with me earlier and I could still give no more answer than 'nothing, I'm just tired', he knew I was lying – we'd been friends since we'd met but that didn't change the fact that he was Rose's cousin. Rose. My Rose. Even I didn't know what was going on between us anymore, we didn't even seem to be friends anymore, everything that we had built in the last four years seemed to mean little to her now. Maybe I should just tell her everything? Tell her how her smile gave me butterflies and just being around her left me weak at the knees? It had to be better than this growing apart that had practically happened overnight.

I'd tell her, I'd have to, my whole reasoning for keeping quiet seemed to fall away around me, surely if there was no friendship to worry about saving then there was no reason to keep quiet? It might not be too late, perhaps it would bring her back to me? Some little part of my mind knew that it would never be that simple but my wishful thinking prevailed. I was absentmindedly running my thumbs over the rim of my mug and staring into the foamy head of the beer inside without realising that the boys were having an entire conversation outside my notice.

"Tryouts are next week so we really need to get some time on the pitch before then." Said Al to Tristan whilst Peter just nodded. Ah Quidditch, it was easy to talk about Quidditch without putting much thought into it.

"Are you trying out again this year Pete?" I asked, since he was the only one yet to get onto the team.

"Yeah, thought I'd give it a go again, I've got nothing to lose right? You'll be seeker again no doubt." Peter mused.

"Hmm I wouldn't be so sure, his head is way out of the game." Interjected Al, directing his gaze to me.

"Psh, don't you worry about me boys, I'll still run all of you into the ground." I smiled without feeling, knowing that I had no other choice.

The other boys just looked at me, Al with pity in his eyes, so I coughed and started again.

"So which position will you try out for this year Pete?" I asked.

"Well I was thinking beater, you're in need of one and I'm not too bad at it."

"You're not too good at anything else either." Joked Al, and the two boys laughed together.

"True, but just wait until I have a beaters bat in my hands and say it again." He threatened, still laughing.

This is what I enjoyed, laughing with my friends about stupid things. I pushed myself back from the table, standing up I said,

"Another round boys?" and they all nodded and made noises in agreement as I picked up their mugs before I turned around to head to the bar.

The bearded old man at the bar barely looked up as I ordered another four butterbeers, placing the empty mugs on the aged wooden bartop. I turned and leant my back against it as I waited and surveyed the pub. The band was still playing and the third year girls were hanging onto the edges of their seats as they leaned forward intently like they hoped to hear some sort of secret message the song was conveying. The pub was busier than usual with groups of people taking over most of the tables. As I looked around I caught pockets of conversations, the discussion of quidditch here, and the groans of homework there. It was nice, feeling surrounded by normality and comfort. I started to turn myself back towards the bar when I caught sight of a maroon dress near the window. Of course she was here, and with him. They were sitting close together in the corner of a small table, two mugs of butterbeer forgotten on the table.

I took a deep breath, steadying myself for the waves of pain that I knew were coming and they didn't disappoint. Each detail I noticed about them sent an even sharper pain through my chest. Their heads were bowed closely together, so close that I could see the loose tangles of her hair touching his face. Their hands were clasped together on the table, folded into one another, her small pale hand nearly hidden beneath McLaggen's larger tanned one. He laughed and their bodies were both rocked by it as she smiled in response. This was far worse pain than I ever thought possible, my body ached to be that close to her, my skin felt cold at the absence of her touch and my chest felt hollow. I swallowed hard, willing my hands to stop shaking and the fog to clear from my mind but nothing quelled the pain.

I had to go speak to her, I'd already decided that she needed to know how I felt and I couldn't take the suspence any longer. I pushed myself from the bartop, hoping to propel my feet towards her, my round of butterbeers forgotten. I wound my way around a few tables before I reached theirs, neither one had noticed me yet so it was with a surprised look that they both turned at my cough.

"Hey… Rose could I talk to you for a minute?" I asked, my voice sounding harsher than I meant but steadier than I felt.

"Errm I'm kind of in the middle of something here, Scorpius." She replied, not making eye contact with me.

"It's important." I urged.

"She said she's busy." Interupted David McLaggen with mild annoyance.

"I'm sorry, but I didn't ask you." I replied cooly, not taking my eyes from Rose.

I heard him get up before I saw him. He was taller than me, but not by much. His advantage was in build, he was more muscular with larger shoulders but I knew that I could cause some damage.

"Well I'm telling you that she's busy so you can leave." He was stood directly in front of me obscuring my view of Rose so I couldn't see her reaction.

"I asked her." I stated cooly, hating the fact that I still had to look up slightly at him.

"Then we're going to have a problem, because you're being rude and we're on a date."

"I'm being rude?" I questioned, taken aback.

"Scorp, just go." Rose appeared at his side, her eyes beseeching.

"I want to speak to you." I repeated, less sure now.

"I can't speak to you." She murmered

"CAN'T? YOU CAN'T? OR YOU WON'T?" I cried too loudly. The music had reached a lull and many people were now turning to see what the commotion was.

"I can't." She repeated calmly.

"BECAUSE OF HIM?" I shouted, leaning my head in the direction of McLaggen.

"DON'T SPEAK TO HER LIKE THAT. JUST LEAVE!" Shouted McLaggen, moving himself between Rose and I once more.

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT I CAN AND CAN'T DO YOU IDIOTIC FLOBBERWORM, SHE'S MY FRIEND AND I WANT TO SPEAK TO HER." I was fuming. This was not how this was supposed to go. I registered Pete and Tristan appear either side of me and begin pulling me away but I held fast.

"WELL SHE DOESN'T WANT TO SPEAK TO YOU, IS THAT SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND?" He shouted back, inches from my face. I felt myself snap and suddenly my fist found his face. I'd taken myself by surprise and evidently him too but he was still fast and the pain in my chest was doubled as his fist made contact, pushing me backward into my friends.

"SCORP, JUST GO." I heard Rose shout. I looked up for her but she was at McLaggen's side and had turned back to inspect the damage to his face. I'd got him good in the nose and he was bleeding.

"Rose…" I began, but she interrupted me. "Go Scorpius, leave." She said it with such cold detachment that I was sure the ice would pierce my heart.

Tristan and Pete pulled me up and lead me outside, but my eyes never left her – and hers never met mine as she pulled his mouth to hers and kissed him.

Okay so more dialogue in this one, probably not the dialogue you want though... But bear with me... We know Rose has her reasons.

Thank-you to everyone that has read or re-read this, love you all. x