K is for King's Den
"So you said you were… friends of Sora?" Simba asked after a moment, brows furrowing together as he watched the darker lion plant one of his large paws on the blond's muzzle and shove it into the ground.
Leon huffed swatted his companion's head again, then turned back to the pride's leader and nodded. "Yes. He promised that he was just going to show Riku the general area and then he was coming directly back to Radiant Garden, where Kairi's staying." His eyes narrowed. "He was supposed to be back two days ago."
Nala frowned in concern. "I hope the hyenas didn't get them. They've been acting up a lot lately."
"Do we need to go and find them then?" Cloud asked, once he'd shaken off any dizziness from the brunet slamming his head into the stone floor.
"No, they probably just lost track of time." Leon paused, then reached over and slammed his head back down. "That never gets old."
"Just because I regenerate is no reason to keep hurting me!" the blond snarled, glaring at him.
"I have plenty of reasons. Would you like me to list them?" Leon narrowed his eyes.
Before Cloud could answer, Nala replied, "I wouldn't mind hearing them."
The gunblader turned his attention on her and scowled in annoyance. "Well, first of all, he's a pervert. On top of that, he's not even a respectful pervert; he doesn't care where we are or who we're with when he gropes me."
Simba and Cloud blinked. Simba was trying to comprehend why two male lions would do sexual things to each other. Cloud was trying to comprehend why showing his lover how attractive he thought he was happened to be a bad thing.
"He's a horrible person to sleep with besides; he snores," Leon continued. "And he hogs the covers. And he has no common sense whatsoever. The other day, he was helping Aerith with spring cleaning, and he accidentally knocked the ironing board over so the iron was about to fall down. Now, a normal person would have let it fall, or at least just grab the cord, because an iron is insanely hot. This moron grabbed it and gave himself second degree burns."
Nala frowned. "I don't know what an iron is, but that reminds me of the time Simba and I accidentally pissed off a rhino. Now, me, I leapt into a tree. Simba, on the other hand, just kept running. And that rhino just kept on charging after him."
"So we both agree that Simba and Cloud are morons," Leon deduced. "Fantastic."
"Hey!" Cloud scowled. "I'm not a moron!"
"…Yes, you are," the brunet stated firmly, then titled his head as he heard happy chattering outside of the cave.
Simba frowned. "It was just that one time, Nala."
She raised a brow at him skeptically. "Should I mention all of your bad ideas from our childhood, too?"
"…No."
"Well, if I know Sora's chatter—and believe me, I do—he and Riku are back. Thanks for letting us stay in here until they managed to drag their butts back here," Leon stated, heaving himself to his feet. "We'll be forcing them back to Radiant Garden now."
As he turned and walked away, Cloud hurried to his feet as well. "I don't really snore, do I, Leon? Leon? You know you could always just kick me and I'd wake up for you to tell me to stop. Leon? …ACKNOWLEDGE ME."
"Fine, I'll kick you next time you snore. Will you hurry up before Sora gets distracted and scampers off again?"
The blond whined. "Why do you never show you love me?"
Leon huffed. "I think cooking for you and having as much sex as you want and then dealing with everyone's teasing shows just how much I love you."