Chapter Eleven – Mountains
The new year brought with it a fresh layer of snow. Maura had the cabin to herself, Constance having decided it was much more fun to spend the holidays with friends – the Rizzolis. Apparently, Angela had invited them all, Maggie included, but as Maura wasn't reading her email, she didn't get the invite that was sent, though Constance made sure to tell her.
Maggie had stayed for Christmas and they had spent a lovely time together, sharing gifts and drinking champagne. It had been quiet, virtually snowed in. But Maggie had had to leave for New Year to visit with her family. She invited Maura, but it just didn't seem the right, and that bothered Maura. They'd been dating for months now and yet, Maura was in no rush to integrate herself into Maggie's life. She liked Maggie.
It had been almost a year already since she had left. A few more weeks and she would need to come to a decision. She would either have to resign or return.
Her thoughts were broken by the high-pitched ping of an email coming through. She opened her laptop and brought up the page. It was from her mother.
Darling,
Wishing you had been here, it's been such fun. Angela outdid herself with the food as usual, and the boys send their love.
Korsak wants to know when you're returning, the current replacement is a bit of a fool apparently.
I have added some photographs. Everyone insisted on taking them and sending them to you, they all miss you, Darling. Especially Jane, though she doesn't say very much lately. But, her little Luca, oh he is such a pleasure. You're missing out on so much. When are you going to come home?
Much love,
Mother
Maura closed the laptop and took a swallow from her wine glass. Why couldn't they all just accept that this was where she needed to be, the mountains. Curiosity got the better of her and she opened the laptop again. She re-read the email and then opened the attachments: 4 photographic Jpegs.
The first was of Constance and Angela holding Luca between them. They were all covered in flour and laughing. Luca looked so much like Jane. She couldn't deny that she had missed so much of his young life already. He had a tooth now.
The second photo was of Frankie, Tommy, and Korsak, with Nina photo bombing in the background. Maura laughed out loud. She touched each face on the screen. She missed them all, of course she did, but the mountains held a protective curtain for her. A physical barrier between her heart and Jane.
Photo number three was of TJ holding his baby cousin. Two peas in a pod.
The last photo was a group shot. Frankie had clearly set the timer and was caught running halfway between. Everyone in the photo was laughing or encouraging him to get back in time. All except Jane. The once confident detective hung at the back of the shot, hidden behind Tommy and Korsak. She looked sad still. Maura scoured the faces for Casey, but he wasn't there. Another deployment maybe; being an army wife probably wasn't much fun.
She printed off copies and slipped them into the drawer of her desk.
~R&I~
Angela Rizzoli was a resourceful woman. Family meant everything to her, and Maura's absence hurt her heart. When Jane left to take Luca home, Angela gathered the troops. She lined them all up on the couch in Maura's living room and explained the situation.
"So, I want all of you to swear that nothing said in this room, leaves this room."
"What happens in fight club, stays in fight club." Tommy grinned as he fist pumped the air. Angela and Constance both glared.
"I think we are all on the same page when I say that we all want Maura to come home, correct?" Constance asked the group and was rewarded with furious nods and the odd quizzical stare. "Good, so we know that by April the 1st Maura must either return or resign from her post."
Korsak sighed. "I just can't take it if she doesn't come back. The new guy's a tool, and as for Jane…"
"Yeah, well that's part of the reason," Angela began. "Look, I know none of you are stupid, we all saw it right?"
The group looked at each other, each wondering if they were being asked what they thought they were. "That uh, Jane and Maura…" Frankie stuttered.
"Were doing it?" Tommy interjected.
"What? No, that's not what…" Frankie shouted at his brother.
"Oh come on, they so were," Tommy continued to argue his corner and got a punch in the arm from Frankie.
"Hey, hey, enough…" Angela shouted, breaking up the fisticuffs. "As far as we are aware, there was no doing it." She glared at Tommy, who got an I told ya so look from Frankie.
All heads turned when Constance said, "Well, let's face it, they both wanted to."
Chapter Twelve – Accidents and Thespians
When Maggie finally returned from her trip home, Maura was beyond happy. She had missed her companion. Although they were sleeping together in the sense of carnal exploration, it was rare that they spent more than two or three nights together. Maura was a sexual being, by her own admission. She liked sex, and she liked sex with Maggie. But something was always missing – something that she lacked, not Maggie. Her lover gave her her all. Her passion and presence were always in the room with them, which was more than could be said for Maura.
Her mother's extended trip to Boston had been prolonged once more. Just a few more days, she had said into the phone the previous night. We're having such fun, Angela and I. Maura loved it that they got along so famously. It did her own mother good to have Angela as guidance.
She stretched and slid further under the covers against the warmth of Maggie, their naked skin flushed still from the exertion of making love. Her phone rang, the ringing sounding louder in the silence of the room. The snow outside had created a blanket that seemed to amplify the noise.
She ignored it, but then it rang again. And again. Now, with a sense of foreboding she climbed from beneath the covers and pulled her dressing gown around her, tightly tying the belt. It was her mother's number calling. She hit redial and prepared herself to give her mother a good speaking-to about boundaries.
"Hello, Maura?" Her heart beat rapidly. It was Jane.
"Yes, Jane…is everything alright?" Hundreds of questions began to run through her mind. She ran a hand through her hair and sat down.
"Maura, there's been an accident."
"What? What's happened?"
"Hey, its okay…look, Connie, she stepped out to cross the street and a courier on a bike, ya know the speedy ones that think they're racing at the Olympics…" She chuckled, but Maura remained silent, taking it all in. "Well, anyway, she got knocked down. She's okay, just banged up a little bit and she's…broken her wrist."
"What? Jane, this is serious. Which one?" An artist couldn't afford to injure their hand. She needed to go to Boston and find out for herself how bad this was.
"I dunno…I wasn't there. Ma called me to the hospital. I got there when they were fixing her up, so I didn't see her. Ma just thrust her phone at me and told me to call you, so that's what I am doing."
"Thank you, I'll be on the next available flight."
"Okay, you want me to pick you up from the airport?" Jane asked hopefully. She could bring Luca, they could finally meet each other.
Maura looked across to the bed at Maggie, who was now sitting up and listening to the conversation, concerned. "No, that's quite alright, Maggie and I will get a cab."
She heard the intake of breath, but Jane didn't comment any further other than to say goodbye and hang up.
"Is everything okay?" Maggie asked. She was up now, the sheet wrapped around her. Maura nodded, but when the tears welled, she grasped hold of Maggie and let her hold her.
~R&I~
She went straight to the hospital only to find that Constance Isles had already left. Of course, they couldn't tell her anything, regardless of the fact that she was the patient's daughter. Which meant only one thing: Maura was going home.
When the second cab pulled up outside of Maura's Beacon Hill address, Maggie whistled. "This is a pretty swell neighbourhood."
"Yes, I suppose it is," Maura said, paying the driver. She looked around and up at her house. She had missed it. "Well, let's get inside and warm up." Fishing her keys from her bag, she felt a little weird to be entering her own front door without knocking first. Maggie wheeled both suitcases behind her and waited patiently.
"You alright?" she asked quietly.
"Yes." Maura nodded. "It's just…I guess it's been a long time since I lived here." She placed her palm flat against the door as though she were caressing a loved one. "I didn't realise how much I missed it."
"Home is where the heart is, so they say." Maggie smiled and placed a chaste kiss to Maura's cheek.
Inside, the house was quiet. Her running shoes were exactly where she had left them, just inside the door where she had kicked them off last. The house was clean; she had made sure to organise a weekly cleaner while she was gone. She placed her keys inside a bowl, out of habit, and wandered further in, her eyes taking it all in as she teased gloves from her fingers. It smelt like home.
"I'll take these up, shall I?" Maggie asked, jutting her chin towards the stairs.
Maura smiled. "Yes of course, 2nd door on the right." She wandered into the kitchen, listening to Maggie climb the stairs with the two small bags. They didn't bring much; Maura had plenty already here, and Maggie was just a light traveller. From the kitchen window, she could see the guesthouse at the other end of the yard. A light was on, illuminating shadows of its occupants.
Her heels click-clacked across the hardwood floor to the stairs. She didn't wear heels often now; at the cabin there was little need of more than a pair of sneakers or her hiking boots. Wearing the heels today was just another small reminder of the little things she missed about Boston. "Maggie, I'm just going to run across to the guest house. I shouldn't be long."
"Sure thing babe," Maggie called back. "I'll just finish unpacking."
~R&I~
Constance Isles was many things. She was accomplished in many ways, but nobody knew just how good of an actress she could be, except for Angela. It was true that she had been run down by an overeager courier on a bicycle. And it was true that Angela had taken her into the emergency department for a once over, where, other than a few bruises, a couple of scrapes and some damaged pride, she was declared fit, well, and healthy and sent on her way. Angela Rizzoli was also many things, a wonderful mother for one. She had learned many ways in which to be sneaky and gather intel on her three children over the years. She knew which buttons a mother could push and which reactions they would garner. Which was why she had suggested this subterfuge to Connie.
It wasn't even that difficult. They had had plenty of time. While Connie rested in the hospital cafeteria, Angela had purchased a few extra bandages and a wrist support. A quick visit to the ladies' room, and Connie walked out with a bandage wrapped perfectly around her head, her wrist in a splint, and a limp she hadn't had when she walked in. It was perfect.
They called Jane and explained what had happened. She rushed to the hospital as they knew she would and fell for it hook, line, and sinker. "Maura however, might be a harder fish to catch, being that she is a doctor and will be insistent that she check me over."
"Just swat her off. Tell you don't need a second opinion for a concussion," Angela said, watching through the window as Maura marched down the path. She turned around to face Connie, holding Luca in her arms. "If she starts to get too fussy, I'll bring in our secret weapon." She grinned, turning Luca to face her. "You'll help your Nonnas, won't you, little man?"
Chapter Thirteen – Missing You
"Maura, stop fussing. I am perfectly fine." Constance Isles said, swatting her daughter's insistent inspection away. "What I'd really love, Darling, is a decent cup of tea. Wouldn't you love a cup of tea, Angela?" She had noticed how often her daughter's eyes flitted across, not to look at Angela, but Luca.
Maura inhaled slowly, her eyes narrowing at her mother. "Fine, I'll organise lunch too, I suppose." She eyed both women as she crossed her arms over her chest. They were up to something.
"Oh, here, Maura, it's okay, I can do it. I have everything Connie needs right here. Can you just take…" Angela didn't wait to finish the sentence before she pushed little Luca into Maura's arms. "Luca, he's a really good baby, not spitty at all."
Before Maura could complain and find a way out of holding Jane's child, Angela was already boiling the kettle. She held him rigid in her arms, not quite sure how to deal with this new problem. He was looking at her, with Jane's eyes staring right back at her. For a moment, she was mesmerised by the tiny version of Jane in her arms. He even smelled like her. She breathed him in, breathed Jane in, that hint of lavender. She missed it.
Luca began to fidget, his little legs kicking, eyes wet with tears. He had Jane's dimple. She pulled him closer to her, wrapping her palm gently around the back of his head as she rocked him, shushing against the soft feather-light dark hair that covered his head.
She was so engrossed in this small child that she hadn't heard the door to the guest house open. "Hey, Ma, there's a movie on tonight, I was thinking we…" Jane stopped speaking the moment she realised that Maura Isles held her son. "Maura, I…I didn't think you'd be here yet."
Maura spun around, eyes wide like a rabbit caught in the headlights. Without a word she thrust Luca at his mother, brushing past Jane and out of the room.
"What the hell just happened?" Jane said, turning away from Maura's departing figure to that of her mother and Constance. She held Luca just the way that Maura had held him.
"What happened, is you threw Casey out and you need to tell her that!" Angela said, turning to Jane.
~R&I~
Maura came through the back door like a whirlwind, the door slamming shut behind her as she opened the door to the refrigerator. She grabbed the unopened bottle of chardonnay and began the process of opening it and pouring a glass. Maggie stood back and watched the scene unfold.
"Everything okay?" she asked. Maura flinched; she hadn't even noticed Maggie in the room, so angry was she with herself for her reaction to Jane – no, her reaction to Luca.
Taking a long swallow, she placed the glass down gently and tried a smile. "Yes, I just…long day. Would you like one?"
Maggie shook her head. "No, and you might want to stop after that one too, someone called Korsak called, he said he heard you were in town and wondered if he could get some advice from you over a case they're working." Maura made no attempt to reply. She just stood there with her left arm wrapped around herself, glass in her right hand, and so Maggie continued. "I said you'd call him back, I hope that was alright to do?"
~R&I~
He had been very persuasive on the phone, and she had found herself making a promise to come out and look over the scene the following morning. Tonight she just wanted to drink wine and relax without thinking about Jane Rizzoli.
When morning came, Maggie watched from the bed as Maura got dressed. She had never seen her as Dr Isles, before and it was something of an eye opener. Maura at the mountains was still a classy and well-dressed woman, but nothing like this. She was spectacular. "You miss this, don't you?"
Maura looked at Maggie in the mirror as she put the other earring in. "What?"
"This? Dressing up, heading out to a crime scene?"
"I miss the mountains too." She grinned. Securing the clasp finally, she stood and checked her appearance just once more. "I shouldn't be too long," she said, leaning over the bed to kiss Maggie's cheek. "And then we can go for lunch somewhere nice, there's a wonderful little French restaurant I am dying to show you."
~R&I~
The crime scene was bereft of everything and everyone. Just Korsak stood there waiting for her arrival. She ducked under the crime tape and smiled as her old friend walked towards her.
"Maura, it's so good to see you," he said, pulling her into a bear hug. His overpowering aftershave filled her senses and brought with it a flood of memories. "I know that officially you're not here, but we're stuck with this and I just figured, another set of eyes…" He tailed off as she smiled at him.
"Of course, Vince. Let's take a look." He walked her through the scene, explaining where the body was found. Johnathon Sharp, 24 years old, found hanging from the rafter.
"But the door was shut and bolted from the inside. All of the windows were locked." She nodded, taking in all of the information. It was a loft apartment. Uncovered beams lined the roof, four altogether.
She could see the issue already. "Did somebody move the chair?" It was at least ten feet away.
He shook his head, smiling. She already knew what it was they were struggling with. The smile dropped from his face slowly as she looked past her at someone else entering the room. "Rizzoli, what are you doing here?"
Maura spun around and came face to face with Jane. Their eyes met and held, and for a moment, it felt like the old days. Jane smiled and those big brown eyes lit up, the dimple popped, and then she looked away over to Korsak. "Frankie said you were here," she said, looking back towards Maura.
"I should get going," Maura said, before turning to Korsak. "Was there a wet patch on the floor when you arrived?"
Korsak nodded. "Yeah, how did you…"
"I assume it was hot in here too, a fire or heater switched on high?" She knelt down beside a darker stain. "He used an ice-block. Slipped the noose around his neck and stood on the block. It probably wasn't too big, but as the ice melted…"
"He lost consciousness and then slowly suffocated," Jane finished.
"Yes, precisely." She picked up her bag and began to walk towards the door.
"Maura, wait," Jane said. She looked to Korsak, who got the message.
"I'll head back to the station. Thanks again, Maura." She smiled and touched his arm has he passed. She had missed him.
She stood there, waiting by the door, her bag held in both hands swung gently in front of her.
"Are you coming home, Maura?" Jane asked, straight to the point. She stood there in all her glory. Raven curls hung loosely, framing her beautiful face and falling down over the shoulders of her form-fitting suit. She looked good, too good.
"I don't know. I haven't decided anything." She spoke honestly.
Jane ran a hand through her hair and sighed. "Does she still make you happy, Maur?"
"Maggie? Yes, she makes me happy."
Jane nodded, swallowing down the hurt. "I just…I didn't get the letter. I wanted you to know that. Casey…he, he hid it."
Maura nodded. Did it make any difference now? "I should get going. It was good to see you, Jane."
Jane took a step forward and then another. Maura backed up, keeping the distance, until there was nowhere to go and her back hit something hard. She swallowed as Jane gained on her. "Can we maybe, could we have dinner or something before you leave?" She was so close now that Maura couldn't avoid looking at her.
"I… I I'm not sure, I have to look after my mother, and then there is Maggie."
Jane nodded. "I understand, I'd just like the opportunity to put things right between us." She reached up and tucked a piece of honey blonde hair back into place behind Maura's ear. "I miss you."
The whimper that left Maura's throat was loud in the silent room. When Jane's warm palm cupped her cheek, she couldn't stop herself from leaning into it. "I have to go. Maggie is waiting." She pressed her palm against Jane's chest and forced her to take a step backwards, allowing her to escape. She took the steps down almost two at a time until she got outside, sucking in lungsful of air.
Chapter Fourteen – Changes
Maura Isles was not an angry person, and so she was shocked with her own reaction to Jane's news. All this time she had been angry with Jane, had assumed that Jane just didn't care, but in fact, the problem hadn't been Jane at all, but Casey.
Casey Jones had come between them in every way a person possibly could, and she hated him for it. She hated herself for being so mean, but she was still angry with Jane. She was the one who put him between them in the first place.
She drove within the speed limit, her brain in overdrive with what to do. Nothing, that was what she decided. She would do nothing because there was nothing to be done. Jane had Casey and she had Maggie. It was that simple.
Arriving back home, she pulled into the drive and sat there, thinking.
Not more than 2 minutes later did Jane's cruiser pull in behind her. Maura ignored it, assuming that Jane was collecting Luca from Angela. She wasn't, and Maura watched, horrified, as she stalked up to the side of the car and squatted down to look into Maura's window.
She gave the universal sign for wind down your window and Maura ignored her, refusing to turn and look at her. Jane then used a knuckle to rap lightly on the glass. "Maura, come on, please. We need to talk."
Maura pressed the button and the window came down. "We most certainly do not."
"I just want to explain, Maura."
"There is no need, I understand all that I need to know. You choose Casey, every time, and I don't need to hear about it." She grabbed her bag and pushed the door open, forcing Jane to step back. "We used to be friends, Jane…"
"We are, Maura."
"No, we haven't been friends for a long time. You make choices that work for you, well now I am making the choices that are right for me."
Maura turned on her heels and saw Maggie in the open doorway. Her face showed no emotions. Maura turned back to Jane. "Thank you, Detective, but if you'll excuse me, I have a date with my girlfriend."
"Hi Jane," Maggie called out with a wave.
"Hey," Jane called back, a defeated smile on her lips.
Maura placed a gentle kiss to the corner of Maggie's mouth. "Give me 10 minutes and I'll be ready to take you to the most amazing restaurant you will ever eat in."
She brushed past Maggie and into the house without a further look at Jane. Maggie hesitated to shut the door. The detective looked distraught. She looked back into the house, where Maura was already halfway up the stairs. "Jane," she called out, taking a step forward. When Jane turned her way, she closed the distance. "Is everything okay?"
Jane regarded the woman and then smiled a thin smile. "Yeah, you take care of her though, alright? She deserves the best anyone can give her."
"I know." She watched as Jane walked away, climbed into her car, and reversed out of the drive.
~R&I~
The restaurant was exactly how Maura had described it, and Maggie enjoyed every morsel of whatever Maura ordered. They shared some wine and a chocolate mousse dessert, but conversation was stilted.
"Maura, what's going on?" Maggie finally asked as they walked back towards the car.
When Maura stopped walking, Maggie stopped too, turning to face her. "I'm sorry, Maggie. I guess I just…it's a little weird being back here."
"You miss it, them?"
"Them?"
"Your friends," she said before adding, "Jane."
Maura smiled sadly. "Of course, but…" She leaned in and kissed her. "I'm sorry, this is our time." She took her hand and started to walk again. "Let's go home, where I can make it up to you."
"Actually…" Maggie stopped walking, and Maura came to a halt too. "I was going to talk to you when we got back, but maybe…maybe now is the time to talk about it."
"Alright," Maura said with a nervous chuckle.
"When I went to see my folks, I kinda had to do some thinking of my own, and I thought I'd come to the right conclusion, but now…"
"Maggie, I don't…you'll need to explain because I'm really not good with trying to read between the lines."
Maggie smiled, cupping Maura's cheek in her palm. "I know, it's one of the things that I love about you, but that's just it…I love you, Maura." Maura blushed, and when her mouth opened to speak, Maggie placed a finger to her lips. "The thing is, I've been offered the opportunity to grow my business, there's a studio that is just perfect for me. Your place is here Maura, not in the mountains. You're missed here, and I can see how much you miss it."
"Maggie, I…" She wanted to explain. It wasn't that she didn't love her, she did in her own way, but it wasn't the same love that she held for Jane, and that was what Maggie deserved.
"It's fine, Maura." She leant in and kissed her cheek. "I'm going to go back, organise my life and go back to Michigan to set up the new studio." She smiled sadly. "I want nothing but happiness for you, Maura, and I wish, I wish that it was with me, I really do, because I know that I could make you happy. But I see the way she looks at you."
"Who? Jane?"
Maggie chuckled. "Yeah, Jane. She loves you, and you love her."
Maura shook her head. "She has Casey,"
"And you have me, but it's not me that you want."
"Maggie, that's not…" She was about to say true, but it was. She wouldn't lie to Maggie, not now. "I can be happy with you."
"I know," she said, taking her hands and kissing her knuckles. "But that's not enough, Maura. I want to be with someone that can't imagine a day without me."
A single tear slid down Maura's cheek, and Maggie pulled her into her arms and they clung to each other. "There will always be love for you within my heart."
"Thank you." Maura sobbed and clung more tightly.
Chapter Fifteen – Home.
She dropped Maggie off at the airport. It was a sad and emotional goodbye, but when Maura sat down later by herself, in her own living room, surrounded by her own life, she knew that Maggie had been right. This was home.
She sat quietly, motionless for the most part, and dissected her entire life, year by year. The solitude of her childhood, the disconnect from her parents through her teenage years and early twenties. The time she spent abroad when she blossomed into the beginnings of the woman she was today, and then there were the Rizzolis, specifically Jane. The one woman who had managed to learn all her quirky ways and actually liked her social awkwardness.
Her silence was shattered when Constance and Angela came in through the back door, laughing about something they had heard on the radio. "Oh, Maura…just the woman," Angela said, still chuckling and kissing Luca's cheek.
Constance limped past Angela and came to sit beside Maura, patting her knee once she was comfortable.
"Yes, Angela, what can I help you with?" As she spoke, Constance narrowed her eyes and watched her daughter.
"Are you and Maggie joining us all for Sunday dinner tomorrow?"
"Oh, uh no. Maggie had to go back to…She went home," Maura admitted. She felt her mother's palm touching her arm. She looked at her and smiled sadly.
"Has something happened?"
Maura nodded sadly. A tear loosened and fell. "We decided, well Maggie was honest enough to acknowledge that maybe we both wanted different things."
~R&I~
Jane was finishing off her shift. She'd already ripped Korsak a new one for not including her in speaking with Maura. It was her case too. She didn't notice the conspiratorial wink he gave Frankie. The plan was simple and had been executed to perfection.
Maura at the crime scene this morning had thrown her for a loop. Since Casey had gone, she had read and re-read Maura's letter more times that she could admit, and each time it had pierced her heart a little more. The thought that Maura had left because she thought Jane didn't care, or love her, stabbed at her own heart. She loved that woman more than she loved herself. Only Luca had a bigger place in her heart than Maura. But then she remembered Maggie.
Her phone buzzed, a text message. She ignored it and picked up a file. The first page had little interest and she moved on to the next. Halfway down the page, another text beeped. She sighed and closed the file. Picking the phone up, she saw her mother's name on the screen. Her initial reaction was fear; was Luca okay? She took a deep breath, realising that if anything had happened then her mother would have called, not texted. She swiped the screen anyway and read the message.
Helicopter Sitter: Come home, Maura's upset. Maggie's gone.
Helicopter Sitter: Now, Jane!
She grabbed her coat and keys and headed out. "Korsak, I gotta go. Maura's…I gotta go, alright?"
"Sure Jane."
~R&I~
Constance had stayed with Maura. Jane found Angela in the guest house with Luca. The baby had needed a diaper change and a feed, so Angela has used the opportunity to send the message to Jane. "Ma, what's going on?" She took Luca from Angela and kissed his rosy cheek. He was teething, his first tooth trying to push through. Angela gave him a teething ring that seemed to quiet him.
"Maggie, she's gone."
"Gone?"
"Gone. Left, no longer here," Angela said sarcastically. "Now, you can swoop in there and…"
"And what, Ma?" Jane said, bouncing Luca gently. "I can't be with her, I've told you this."
"But Jane, you love her."
"Yeah Ma, and that's why…you know this."
Angela wiped the countertop down and remained quiet. These girls frustrated the hell out of her.
"Ma, come on, don't do that."
"Do what?" Angela shrugged and feigned indifference.
Jane pointed at her. "That, that silent treatment bullshit."
"Language, don't use that mouth around my grandbaby."
"He doesn't care, Ma," Jane said moving around the counter. "I know you just want what's best for me. You love me so much, right, that you want the best for me." When Angela nodded, Jane added, "That's how I feel about Maura."
Angela nodded. "Baby, just…it's Maura, honey. She's over there and she needs a friend."
"I'll try, okay, Ma…But if she sends me away, you gotta accept that, okay?" She smiled at her mother and breathed deeply before heading to the door. "Oh and Ma, tell Constance to remember to limp on the right leg. Maura will spot it in an instant."
~R&I~
Jane knocked on the back door and entered Maura's home. She found her friend in the kitchen, the kettle boiling as she prepared cups for tea. Constance nodded and smiled. "Jane." She reached out touched her arm. "Maura was just making tea, maybe you could join her? I am feeling a little tired, my head still aches a little."
Maura turned in alarm. "You still have a headache? Temperature? Any pain anywhere—"
"Maura, Darling…I am fine, I just need a lie down. I am sure Jane here can keep you company, you have lots to catch up on." Before Maura could make any further comment, Constance had limped out of the door.
The silence between them was loud. Maura finished making her tea, including one for Jane, though she hadn't asked if she wanted one. When she took the tray into the living room, Jane followed.
"I should have expected that Angela would send you over," Maura said, pouring the tea into a cup.
"She's worried about you…we all are," Jane replied, taking a seat opposite. The days of squashing up together on the couch were behind them.
Maura held up a cup and saucer for Jane to take. "I'm perfectly fine. I came to check on my mother." Jane took the cup and Maura began to pour her own cup. "You do know there is nothing wrong with her, don't you?"
Jane nodded. "Yep,"
"Hmm, I'm not sure what she is up to…"
"They want us to talk," Jane butted in. "And they want you to come home, everyone does."
Maura tilted her head. "Everyone?"
Jane grinned and nodded. "Yes."
"Even Casey?" Maura said, sipping her tea.
Jane breathed deeply, placed her cup down on the table. "I wouldn't know what Casey wants." When Maura didn't comment, she continued. "I didn't get your letter Maura, Casey took it and hid it from me."
"Would it have made any difference if you had?"
Jane shrugged. "Yes and no."
Maura waited for further explanation. She wasn't sure what she had expected the answer to have been.
"It would have stopped me from marrying Casey," Jane admitted. "And I would have come to the airport."
"But not because you wanted me."
Jane stood up and paced. She ran her hand through tangled raven locks and then stopped, turning to face Maura. "You know how I feel."
"Do I?"
"Yes! That's why you wrote me the letter, why you tried to force my hand."
Maura looked away, knowing the truth in those words.
"You know…that I love you."
Maura closed her eyes. She didn't dare look at her. To hear the words she had longed for and know that a "but" was going to follow it up was a torturous mix of wonder and pain.
"I can't be responsible for…while he is alive, I can't…"
"Your marriage vows are important, of course. I think you should go, Jane. Go home back to your husband and your life together and let me… let me live mine," she pleaded.
Jane sighed and threw her hands up in the air. "Casey's gone, Maura. I threw him out the minute I discovered he had stolen your letter, before I even knew what you had said in it."
"I…I don't understand…" Maura stood herself now, pacing the room as Jane had done. "If not Casey…then why?"
"Hoyt."
"Hoyt?" Now Maura really was confused. "He's in prison, Jane. Why would he have any…"
"Because he kills couples Maura, and while he lives, and he obsesses over me…I can't let him know, he would find out about you and then you'd be his target. You, Maura!"
Maura remained silent, letting the information sink in. She had been gone for almost a year, and their relationship strained for much longer.
"And what about your child?"
Jane turned sharply to face her. "What?"
"Your child, Jane. Do you think a child is immune from someone like Hoyt?"
"What? No…What do you mean?"
Maura was livid. The time they had wasted. The lives they had interacted with and hurt. "You brought a child into the world…a world that's so dangerous for you that you couldn't let yourself love me?"
"That's now…I'd die protecting Luca," Jane argued.
"And that's just how you were with me, Jane. Hoyt tried and failed because you stopped him."
Tears streaked down Jane's face as she remembered. "I can't lose you," she stuttered.
"But you have! Don't you see that?" Maura shouted. "You chose Casey and you lost me!"
Jane moved in, bringing them close to one another. "But you can come home, now that Casey is gone we can…"
"We can what, Jane? We can spend our evenings snuggled on the sofa, best friends raising your child together?"
Jane nodded, wiping the tears away, "Yes! That's…"
"No! No, Jane that's not…I can't be just your friend, I want more and if you can't…won't, give it to me then my home is elsewhere."
~R&I~
The mountains were cold and misty. Maura had arrived back the previous day with Constance in tow and immediately set about cleaning the cabin from top to bottom. Anything to keep herself busy.
Constance had given up the pretence of an injury after Maura had put her and Angela straight. She made it clear to both of them that they were to stop interfering. Jane had made her choices and that meant Maura had all the answers she needed.
She had three weeks left to make her final decision, three weeks to organise herself one way or the other.
Chapter Sixteen –
The mountains were particularly lovely today. It was cold, but clear. The sun was bright and shining down on the cabin Maura considered home for now.
Constance had gone into town. She had ordered in some art supplies and they had arrived at the store ready for her to collect. So, Maura thought nothing more when the sound of a car pulling in filtered through to her seat on the deck. She'd wrapped up well and was enjoying the cool fresh air, a book open in her lap. She kept her eyes closed and relaxed.
She had returned three days ago, and she missed Boston. The hustle and bustle of daily life, heading to a crime scene again had been a real buzz, and she hadn't realised just how much she missed it until she found herself back in it. Having spent the last year trying to prove how much she didn't need it, she realised all she was doing was proving how much she didn't need Jane, and she was wrong on both counts.
Footsteps grew nearer and she smiled at the thought of her mother. Who knew that Angela would rub off so well on Constance?
"Did you get it?" she asked, her eyes still closed against the sun.
"Not yet…"
The voice wasn't that of her mother, and her eyes shot open. "Jane?"
The brunette was really there, right in front of her. A half smile on her face lay somewhere between nervous and excited.
"Hi."
"H-how?" Maura sat upright and instinctively smoothed out imaginary wrinkles in her shirt.
"Well, it seems Jane Rizzoli is not above begging when it comes to Maura Isles. Constance gave a good fight, but I wore her down when I told her I could just find out with an illegal use of my badge. Apparently, she doesn't 'want to see her future daughter-in-law get a criminal record and become unemployable.'" She used air quotes and shrugged.
Maura didn't speak. She found herself wedged in a space between shock and hope.
"The thing is, Maura. I can't marry you…not yet, I started divorce proceedings with Casey, but ya know it takes as long as it takes."
"You're divorcing him?" Jane nodded. "Because he stole the letter?"
"Yes, that's part of it, but mainly the reason is that I love him, he's a good man in his own way and he did his best, but I'm not in love with him. I never have been. I had this irrational fear of Hoyt…"
"Hardly irrational, the man has tried to kill you. It's a perfectly normal…"
Jane stepped forward and placed a fingertip to Maura's lips. The gentle touch brought a small gasp and then silence.
"My point is, Maura. I am in love with you, and I figured if you won't come home then I'd best come out here and see what it's like that keeps you here…I figure if I'm going to move here then I should at least know what…"
"Move here?" Maura exclaimed. "You'd move here…to be with me?"
"I'd go to the ends of the Earth to be with you, Maura. Don't you know that?"
Maura shook her head. Tears pooled in her eyes until one solitary drop slid and created the path for others to follow.
"I've been a fool. I thought that if I just…I thought you'd be there, that you and I would raise Luca. Casey would be away for most of the year and we'd just settle into…" She stopped speaking, ran a hand through her hair and looked around. "I settled. I settled for second best when I should have been running after you and never allowing you to even think about needing to leave. I let you down, I let us down. But not anymore." She reached out and took Maura's hand, grateful when she didn't pull away. "If you still want an us, then I..."
"Where is Luca?" Maura asked.
Jane smiled. "In town, with Constance."
"With my mother?" Maura's eyes widened. "Are you sure that's wise?"
Jane laughed. "She's become quite attached. He does that, uses that little finger of his to wind you in."
"I'm moving back to Boston." It was only as she said the words that she realised that was her plan. She was going home.
"Great, well that's…" Jane smiled but the nerves returned, aware that Maura hadn't answered her question.
"But I have a few weeks left here."
"Okay, well I'm just glad you're coming home."
Maura smiled and moved in closer. "Do you have unused leave like usual?" Tentatively she let her palm rest against Jane's shoulder.
Grinning, Jane said, "I do…"
"Good, take it and stay here with me."
Jane closed the gap, their lips just inches apart. "Already did." She smirked before moving in and claiming the doctor's lips with her own. Maura slid her palm higher, around the detective's neck and pulled her closer until nothing could come between them. Lips parted, allowing Jane entrance into her heart and soul. A kiss that poured all the words they would ever need into each other's soul. "Don't leave me again," Jane whispered as they separated, clinging to one another.
"Never."
AN: My stories will no longer be posted here. Instead, I have a facebook group you can join. Its called ItsClaStev Fanfic, If you like reading my Rizzles fanfic then come along and join me there. Cx