I remember...how I sunk...
It was just another sortie, and like always, we eliminated the Abyssal fleet in the area. I barely did anything as we only encountered an Abyssal torpedo squadron. Right after we eliminated the enemy, I saw a figure...a white human-like person in a distance.
I want to go back...
Her lips moved and despite the distance, words echoed in my head. It was as if she was speaking inside my mind.
"Fubuki-chan, what's wrong?" Mutsuki-chan looked worried
"That person over there..."
Yuudachi-chan went to my side and the two of them looked at each other, very puzzled.
"What person, poi?" Yuudachi-chan tilted her head
"Heh? That person over there" I pointed in a distance
"Fubuki-chan...there's no one there"
A second ago, a person clad in white stood on the water's surface, directly gazing at me. The next second...the girl disappeared without a trace. Maybe, I was just imagining things.
"Right..." I'm as confused as they are
When we returned to the Naval district, I'm still curious at what happened earlier and didn't notice Mutsuki-chan was talking to me.
"Fubuki-chan, are you even listening?" She waved her hand in front of me
"Ah, sorry. I was spacing out"
"Moouuu. You're acting weird again, poi"
In the end, I brushed it off as nothing but a figment of my imagination and it's nothing to be worried about.
"It's not real..." I sighed
It took me while to sleep that night and once I closed my eyes, I entered within another dream. Though...it's more of a nightmare than a dream...I was sinking to the bottom, helplessly falling and falling.
"The...light..."
I want to reach for it, but I just seem can't. It was impossible. I thought I would be surrounded by darkness when crimson surrounded me. When I sank to the bottom, I woke up floating on the water's surface.
I want to go back...
An arm clad in a black metal or made of black steel grabbed my hand and tried to pull me down, but I resisted. The same words repeated over and over again until I was awaken.
"Fubuki-chan!" Mutsuki-chan shook me
"Are you okay, poi?"
The two of them looked really worried at me. I was confused to why.
"What?"
"You were having a bad dream, poi" Yuudachi-chan answered
"Yeah. You're head was turning left to right and you were saying something"
"I-I was..."
I rubbed off my head and tried to process what just happened. It was lunch time when I was able to clear my mind and focus on what will happen today.
"Are you sure you're not sick? You look a little pale" Mutsuki keeps worrying
"N-no, I'm fine. Really...!"
The three of us head to the cafeteria to get something to eat. We sat down and started enjoying our meals when the commander makes another announcement.
To all ship girls present and currently listening, I have an important announcement to make.
"Important announcement?" I'm curious to know
"Is it a night battle?!" Sendai-san raised her arms in the air
"Sendai-neesan, you're making a scene again...!"
To keep Sendai-san silent, Jintsuu-san struck a vital point and rendered the ninja unconscious.
Three days from now, the Maizuru Naval district will initiate a night operation to Savo island together with another Naval district. Ship girls who will participate in the operation will be announced tomorrow. That will be all for now.
An operation, huh? It's been more than a month since we had our last operation with another Naval district. I wonder how the operation is going to be and who will be included.
"I-if it's a night battle...leave it to me!" Sendai-san weakly smiled
Savo...island. I wonder Why do I feel dread when I thought of that place.
It's because it's your grave...
I heard that voice again. I looked everywhere, but I didn't see her or anyone that could have possibly said that. I stood up and looked around, but there was no one...
"Fubuki-chan?" Mutsuki-chan looks puzzled
"A-ah. It's nothing..." I sat back down
I thought it was just my imagination when I heard it the first time, but hearing it for the second time...it's something else but my imagination. That night, I had a hard time falling asleep, thinking about that strange voice.
"I...wonder...what does it means...?" I yawned, beginning to fall asleep
Closing my eyes, I hoped not to see a nightmare like me last night...but it happened again anyway.
"..."
It was so dark, I could barely see my surroundings. The details are a bit static, but I can see myself retreating from the bombardment with Mutsuki. Someone suddenly turned on her searchlight and shone at the enemy.
"No!"
The figures that bombarded us are Abyssal battleships and destroyers. One of them I can recognize. I clearly saw the feared Battleship Princess grinning at us as she ordered the Abyssals to fire.
"Aaah!" All of us are taking damage
We couldn't retreat as Abyssal planes are preventing us from doing so. We are being overpowered and we are trapped. As I keep taking damage, Mutsuki attempted to fire at the enemy flagship, thus focusing on her instead.
"Mutsuki, no!"
I don't know what's happening anymore, but I used the little strength I have to go to Mutsuki at my top speed. The enemy battleship started to focus on her and before it could deal a fatal blow on her, I rammed her with all my force...and took heavy damage.
"Mut...suki..."
My vision is beginning to fade as I slowly reach my hand to Mutsuki even though she's far. After that, it became dark and I woke not in the real world but at that crimson place again.
"You can never escape it. You will come back...back to where you first ended..."
The voice became a bit clearer and less echoing. Tue voice is a bit similar to mine with the exception of the echoing effect.
"Who...are...you? What do you want from me?"
"I am you...and you are me..."
A white figure surfaced out of the water and looked at me. I was shocked to see she greatly resembled me in facial appearance.
"We' were separated...but we will become one again..."
I screamed as chains forcedly dragged me below the water surface as I retaliated. In the end, I woke up with a gasp and realized it was morning...
"Just what did that dream meant?"
I decided to take a walk early in the morning and tried to think about what's been happening to me. I sat near the cape's edge and sighed.
"Oh? You're a bit early, Fubuki-san" Akagi-senpai smiled at me
"A-ah, yes...!" I stood up
Her expression changed. Akagi-senpai tilted her head and looked at me closely for a while.
"Something's bothering you, isn't it?"
"You noticed...?"
"I can tell if someone is having a problem" She smiled
Her kind and gentle expression gestures me to tell what's been on my mind. Knowing Akagi-senpai, I decided to consult her about my current problem.
"The truth is..."
I told her everything starting to the figure I saw the other day and the strange dream I had last night. After hearing all of it, Akagi-senpai closed her eyes and went into a deep thought.
"Fubuki-san, what you're seeing is a sign"
"A sign?"
"Yes. You're dream may be showing you what will happen to you"
"What will...happen to me. A premonition?"
Akagi-senpai nodded with a serious yet worried expression. A premonition. Don't tell me...that it's real and will happen eventually.
"That dream...what can I do about it?" I asked for advice
"The only thing you can do is fight it. Fubuki-san, if fate pushes you...you have to push harder with you will"
"My...will?"
"Your will to change the outcome will determine your fate. If you don't have a resolve, you will be pulled by your fate"
A...resolve? So I have to do my best and fight against this so called fate in order to prevent from losing my friends. Akagi-senpai...you talked as if it happened to you before...
"Right! I will...I will not let that premonition come true!" I told her
I am ship girl, but I will not let fate and the past dictate what will happen to me. I will fight against it...no matter what!
Later that day...
It's already dinner time and the torpedo squadron three ate together. Since it's night, Sendai-san is twice as active than in the morning.
"Ooooh! I can't wait for the announcement!"
Since it's a night operation, Sendai-san is definitely hoping she will be included. Jintsuu-san just smacked her face with her hand when the ninja loudly yells "night battle" over and over again.
"...?" When the buzzer hit, we know the Admiral is going to make the announcement
Good evening, ship girls. Tonight I will be announcing the two fleets that will be participating in the operation.
The others are nervous while some are excited, especially the night battle maniac and...Yuudachi-chan.
For the assault fleet, Yamato will be the flagship. Ship girls included are Battleships Hiei, Kirishima, Heavy cruiser Kako, and Light cruisers Sendai, and Jintsuu
Upong hearing her name, Sendai-san stood in excitement and yelled so loudly, Jintsuu-san punched her unconscious. She then dusted off her palms and quietly sat back down.
For the Express fleet, Aoba willl be the flagship. Ship girls included are Destroyers Fubuki, Mutsuki, Yuudachi, and Heavy cruisers Furutaka and Kinugasa
Unlike the others, I feared for the worst as my heart raced.
The operation will commence at 2200 tomorrow night. To all ship girls included in the operation, prepare not just your body but your mind as well. That will be all.
My hands are shaking, probably a sign that I greatly fear for what will happen. Remembering that dream, I saw how we were overwhelmed by the enemy. Ship girls sunk...including me, but I won't let anyone sink.
The next day...
Twelve hours before the operation and my hearts is still racing every time I think about it. I expect for the worst...that's why...I had to talk to the commander last night.
"I wonder if I should tell Mutsuki-chan..."
Her cheerful and excited face is stopping me from telling her that there's a chance I along with other ship girls will sink in the operation.
"Fubuki-chan" Mutsuki embraced me from behind
Like always, she's cheerfully smiling as if there was no hint of sadness. I just couldn't break her happiness if I tell her I might not survive tonight's operation.
"Aren't you excited, Fubuki-chan?"
"H-huh?" I'm confused
"We get to be in an operation together. It's been a long time, you know"
I guess she's only happy and excited because...we get to be in an operation together after a long time.
"Yeah. I'm happy..." I forced a smile
Mutsuki-chan noticed the strangeness in my smile and realized my expression isn't genuine.
"You look a little down, Fubuki-chan?"
"N-no...I just thought how great a friend Mutsuki-chan is"
Looking at her reminded me of something Akagi-senpai told us some time ago.
Tell the people you love what you feel about them...because they might not be there tomorrow.
Those words alone filled my heart with great regret and sadness that I just hugged Mutsuki-chan.
"Mutsuki-chan, even if I'm not here...promise me you won't be sad"
"W-what?"
"When I'm gone, don't cry...okay? Because you're sadness pains me"
I let go of Mutsuki-chan and told her that...preparing to either face or fight my fate. I want to make sure...at least, I can ease Mutsuki-chan's pain a bit if I were to sink.
"D,don't say such weird things! I even want to give you this charm"
"Charm?"
"Here"
She brought out a silver pendant held by thing silver chain. The pendant has a character engraved in the middle which reads safety on one side and protection on the other.
"This gave me strength whenever I got nervous on dangerous missions"
"I see..." I'm going to treasure it
"Now it's yours. So don't go saying weird things like that, okay?"
"Right...Thank you, Mutsuki-chan. I will treasure this forever"
With this, I can be reminded of Mutsuki-chan whenever I would touch and look at it. I hung it around my neck and the two of us smiled happily.
That was the last time...I felt happiness...
The night of the operation came. At 2145, the two fleets gathered at the slipway in preparation of launching. As I held the necklace, I closed my eyes and thought about my fate...
I will fight against it...no matter what...
Before we could launch, the Admiral makes one final announcement before we equip our rigging and sail.
To the Assault and Express fleet, this is your admiral speaking. Some of you may be nervous with the exception of Sendai...but remember we proved to overcome many night battles before.
"Yeah night battle!" Sendai-san yelled excitedly
This is just another step forward into claiming back our calm seas! That is why, us from the Maizuru naval district will show the Abyssals that we will not lose the war!
Everyone raised their hand and roared battle cries, including me. As the fairies finished the preparation and signalled, all the ships launched one by one...
Solomon islands...
By now, we will reach Savo island in about an hour and meet up with Yokusaka's Express fleet. The wind feels nice, but the moonless night feels unsettling and it worries me greatly.
"Fubuki-chan, are you nervous?" Mutsuki-chan suddenly asked
"Eh? Well...maybe...a little?" I shrugged my shoulders
"Me too. But knowing Fubuki-chan and Yuudachi-chan are here, it makes me feel better" She's cheerful as ever
"Yeah. Me too...but I'm still a little worried"
My hand reached to my chest and I can hear my heart beating fast, the fear rushing all over my body.
"You don't to worry or be scared Fubuki-chan. We've been through worse"
"Mutsuki-chan..."
"We'll definitely go home together!" She raised her hands in the air
"Poi!
Yuudachi-chan joined in as well and raised her arms wildly and excitedly in the air. I'm glad to have met such good friends and comrades...
"Alright, 75 kilometers before we reach the destination" Aoba-san, the flagship updated us
"Don't yell too much, Aoba. There might be Abyssals here"
"They can't see us with the cover of the moonless night"
Aoba-san is too confident and relaxed despite being a bit of a risky operation. Everyone knows what the Abyssals are capable of which is why we mist never underestimate them.
"And we can't see them either. There might be Abyssals waiting for us" I told Aoba-san
"That's right" Furutaka-san agreed
"Aaah! You guys worry too much"
I noticed Mutsuki-chan looking at me with a worried expression again.
"What's wrong, Mutsuki-chan?"
"Ah, it's nothing. I'm just a little nervous since it's so dark..."
I'm more than nervous...I'm afraid with the lightless surroundings and the fact that our radars aren't reliable at night. It's been a few minutes and I think I can see Savo island's figure from afar.
"Ooh? It's the allied fleet" Aoba-san pointed
"I don't think those are allied ship girls" Kinugasa-san shook her head
"It's hard to see, poi" Yuudachi-chan squinted her eyes
"They are our allies. It's just hard to see because our allies" Aoba-san insisted
"You're not even paying attention! How can there be even an allied convoy here?!" Her sister ship is completely furious
"Alright. As flagship...you check it and confirm it" She pointed at Mutsuki-chan
I suddenly had a bad feeling about this and I saw the image of that white figure in my head. Its voice echoed in my head repeatedly whispering to me 'I want to go back'.
"Flagship! Requesting to accompany Mutsuki-chan" I asked
"Ah...sure. Go ahead"
"I still don't think those are ship girls"
Furutaka-san told the flagship, but she refused to listen. As Mutsuki-chan and I cautiously head towards the location of unknown figures, a glint in the sky sent warning signals to all my senses.
"Mutsuki-chan!" As I called her out, shells rained on us
Most of them missed and we were lucky enough to take little damage from those battleship sized attacks. As Mutsuki-chan and I decided to retreat, I was shocked at what the flagship did.
"We are not the enemy. This is Aoba!"
"Thats clearly the enemy, idiot Aoba!"
At that moment, Aoba-san light up her searchlight, revealing not just the enemy fleet that fired at us, but our positions as well.
"I told you they are enemies you good for nothing!" Kinugasa-san smacked Aoba-san
"Everyone, surface combat!" Furutaka-san yelled out
Enemy battleships? Here?! It can't be! Don't tell me they predicted our plan and had their heavy force ambush us here knowing our fleet composition.
"Battleship Princess spotted, poi!"
The enemy flagship is none other than Battleship Princess. Just then...dive fighter-bombers struck us from above and damaged us.
"Also Wo kai flagship, poi!"
A carrier?! No...why...?! This is the one thing...I wanted to avoid. At this rate, we will all be sunk by the Battleship Princess' fleet...and the operation will fail. Furutaka-san gets damaged and temporarily loses power and Kinugasa-san covered fire. Yuudachi-chan and Mutsuki-chan can't evade nor fire their cannons properly with enemy planes and shells bombing us. I froze in the scene of chaos, seeing how the future I wished to avoid...unfolded right in front of my eyes.
"I will not let that happen!" I readied my main battery
I started fighting with all my strength, but it's impossible for a Destroyer to take on a battleship. I keep firing my cannons, but the heavy bombardment is making it hard to hit the enemy.
"Aah!" I was moderately damaged when the battleship Princess fired at me
The enemy flagship grinned victoriously as she ordered her mindless pet to aim once more. A single missed shot from Mutsuki-chan caused the Princess to turn around and notice Mutsuki-chan.
"No! Mutsuki-chan!"
I became badly damaged from a direct hit from the Battleship Princess and the gunfire from other Abyssals. I forced my body to move with all its remaining strength and my desire not to lose any of my friends.
"Aaaaah!" I moved at my current top speed
Mutsuki-chan is taking gunfire from other Abyssals and before she could reposition herself, the Battleship Princess pointed at her, signalling thr thing behind her to fire a salvo.
"Mutsuki-chan!" I pushed Mutsuki-chan with all my strength
As a result, I ended taking heavy damage from a single shell from the Princess class Abyssal.
"Not...good...!"
My engines are down and my propeller shaft is barely functioning. I'm beginning to lose power on my turbines...
"Aah, looks like...I'm dead on the water..."
Mutsuki-chan is on her knees, but she's forcing herself to stand up. When she realized her legs are refusing to listen to her, she tried to reach out to me even though we are separated in a distance.
"Fubuki-chan!" She called me out with tears in her eyes
"I'm sorry...but...it looks like...my fate...is inevitable..."
Using the last of my strength, I raised my arm and tried to reach out to Mutsuki-chan. She kept calling out my name even though it's already hopeless for me.
"Mutsuki-chan...when I come back...I...want you...to fulfill...my last wish..."
She continued to cry. Mutsuki-chan, you know I don't want to see you cry because it hurts me the most...
"I'm sorry...I can't properly...say goodbye to...you..."
It was my last words to her as the moment the shells struck me and exploded my ammo storage, everything went dark and the pain faded away. The moment I fell below the water surface, my senses are beginning to feel numb.
"I'm sinking...huh"
Even though sinking as a ship girl is a horrible fate, I couldn't help but smile st this. I wonder if I was able to change something? I wonder...did I protect Mutsuki-chan? Because...I want to go down...knowing I at least protected my friend.
"When I come back...I hope...I won't see you cry..."
My body feels so cold and my consciousness is beginning to fade away.
"H-huh...a light...?"
Why is there a light? Well, it doesn't matter that now I'm sinking. I wish I could reach for that light, but my hand failed to reach for it.
"I don't...want this...but it can't...be...helped..."
That's it for me. I closed my eyes and embraced the cold darkness waiting for me. I didn't what happened to me or my body, but I remember that white figure's voice.
"You came back...in the end..."
A girl whose clad in white with distinctive red eyes and a pair of horns. Not to mention that iron collar on her neck and shackles...
"I know you would come back here...because this is your fate"
Right. I forgotten about it a long time ago. The original vessel of my soul sank being split in half without accomplishing anything. I wanted to do so much as a special type Destroyer that my desire created me...
"The person who you used to be will disappear and be forgotten in this eternal grave"
I no longer have the strength or retaliate as my body became numb and paralyzed. Her metal like arm with glowing red cracks gently touched my cheek.
"Your hope will disappear and only your resentment for humanity will remain"
"I...don't want that"
The power of the abyss itself is beginning to consume me with darkness starting spread. It won't be long before my consciousness will completely disappear...and I will come back as an Abyssal.
"This is our fate as ship girl and Abyssals"
"..."
"...That is why...this was bound to happen..."
"..." My strength is fading away
"You don't have to do anything anymore. Just disappear in a closed world awaiting for the net tragedy bound to happen again"
"Mutsuki-chan...everyone...forgive me..."
The last thing I saw was my Abyssal self blankly staring at me with a stoic and emotionless face. Am I...going to come back...as an Abyssal with no memory...of my old self...and devoid of all feelings?
Everything went dark...
"And the cycle repeats again..."
I don't know how long I was resting under the bottom, but when I woke up again...I heard the voice of the abyss calling me back to the surface.
"Mutsuki. Mut...suki..." I uttered her name instinctively
I remember it clearly now. It was my desire to see Mutsuki again that I let that voice get a hold of me.
"I...don't want to forget...myself..."
I instinctively thought of that the moment I came back. Now I understand why, but something inside me is preventing me from remembering my old self.
"I must never...forget...who...I am..."
I walked towards the shore, clinging to the only reminder of Mutsuki I have left. It was the necklace she gave me before...I sunk...
"Mutsuki-chan!"
After I became dark again, I gasped for air and realized, I my body is lying down with a tree shading me from the sunlight. The moment I woke up, I remembered...my final moments...before I sunk...
"Now I understand what you're trying to tell me...and who you are..."
It's all coming back to me now and these fragments are becoming clearer. The reason why I retained vague feelings and memories about my former was because...my soul...just became whole again. That mysterious girl...she was who I used to be before I became like this.
Extra
Fubuki awakened in an island she never saw before. Rather than being an ordinary island, she saw concrete ground and structures built all over the island. The structures are definitely man made, yet it looks abandoned for a long time and not a single person is present. She walked around for a few minutes and felt a little eerie over the complete silence. Not long she heard footsteps coming to her direction and faint growling.
"...!" When she turned around and prepared to attack the source of the sound, she raised her her hands when she saw who the person is
"Took you a while to wake up"
An Abyssal with long hair and physique at the same size as Harbor Princess greeted her with a faint smile. The Abyssal whose turrets have monstrous mouths and acted as her tail walked towards her.
"Aren't you...? What are you doing here? How did I get here?"
"I found you passed out in a...risky...territory so I brought you here since this is a neutral territory"
"Why?"
"Seaplane tender Water Princess asked me to make sure none of the other Abyssals find you, especially Central Princess"
Fubuki is still suspicious towards the Abyssal Aviation battleship despite the claim of 'saving' her. Well, in her situation, trusting another Abyssal is the last thing she would do.
"It's fine if you don't trust me. But know this...Seaplane tender Water Princess isn't on the Abyssal fleet's side"
"Then whose side is she on?"
"Her own"
"Why...why would she do all this kind of things? What does she want from me?" Fubuki demanded to know
"There's still chance for you. Another chance for you to finally find peace and get the rest your soul had longed for"
"What I had longed for?"
The Princess class Abyssal smiled gently at Fubuki's confused state as if it was cute.
"You'll find out soon...once you recovered all of your memories"
"My memories?"
"You're a bit different from us that's why there's still hope for you..."
As the clouds blocked the moonlight, the strange Abyssal turned away and walked away waving her hand at the still confused Fubuki.