Thanks to everyone who left reviews on the last chapter because, besides comments are always good, now that we no longer have Cory and will miss Finn too, I'm always in doubt whether people will continue interested in reading or not. Please keep me informed!
I had very few reviews on the last chapter of the fic What can not be cured, which is now complete. I don't know if you haven't seen that it had been updated or if you did not liked it, so I'm talking about it here, for you to read if you like history, but haven't known it. If you didn't like it, just ignore! haha
A big kiss to all of you and happy reading!
Rachel parked her brand new and very white Maybach Landaulet, that she made a point of driving, in her particular spot in the parking lot of the private mansion where the BDSM club took place, between a red Karmanguia, that was a collectioner item owned by Harmony, and Kitty's black Range Rover. She got out from the car and finally managed to smile, observing how the models of the vehicles reflected the personalities she and her best friends assumed when visiting that one place.
The mansion was huge and screamed luxury, both when viewed from the outside and in each of its rooms opened to members. On the top floor, there were bedrooms with acoustic treatment where sexual domination could be practiced, but it also existed, in the property, bars, restaurant, private rooms for group chat, game rooms, saunas and heated pools, as in an ordinary luxurious club. It was, in short, a place of interaction, so that people who had something peculiar in common could be presented to eachother or just reunite and talk about their unusual preferences, which they normally could only do to one another.
Miss Berry walked to one of the private livingrooms, which had been reserved earlier, so she could talk to Kitty and Harmony, since this was the purpose of her visit, and not finding any partner nor participating in any erotic game. She needed Kitty, who was a dominatrix like her, and had also entered that world because of past traumas, to understand what was happening to her feelings, and Harmony, who was a submissive in sex, to try to understand what Finn probably was feeling.
It is clear that any woman in her situation would resort to her friends when passing by an impasse in their relationship, but in her case, it was crucial that their best friends were part of the club, because the troubled relationship was not conventional and she could only imagine that conventional advices would not apply. She had never been so grateful to have met the two girls in her first visit to the club, when she was taken by a young man with whom she had started a relationship and that, unlike all the others that used to just move away, realizing that she only felt pleasure when she was in control, decided to introduce her to the right place where she would find the right people.
Upon reaching the lighted room, furnished with beige suede sofas and armchairs, and dark mahogany tables with pink marble tops, she found Kitty, with her blond hair stuck in a high ponytail, eyes highlighted by a dark makeup and purposefully pale lips, her body sculpted by a leather jumpsuit with snake print, and a very high black scarpin in her feet. Rachel greeted the girl with a hug and walked to Harmony, which contrasted with her friend in everything, starting with her very dark hair, which was loose and tidy in waves, and the makeup, in which the most prominent thing was the red lipstick, and ending in the clothing that completed her pin-up style: a strapless white dress with black polka dots and flared skirt, with a yellow varnish belt marking her waist, and a pair of peep toes with the same three colors on her feet.
If Kitty and Rachel had lived from early with male tyranny and, because of that, they had ended assuming the dominant positions in their relationships, Harmony, in turn, sought to take the submissive position to try and access her more feminine side through the practice, because she had assumed, yet very young, a position that demanded a posture that was somewhat masculine, when join the United States army. When she was not dressed in dark green uniforms or camouflage, and driving jeeps, she made a point to doll up and drive to the club in her red car with upholstered in white leather, to have sweet and colorful drinks, and make sure that she was still a lady.
"So what is the emergency?" Harmony was the one who asked, after the greetings.
"It seems to be serious!" Kitty said, looking Rachel up and down, and not disguising that she was wondering about her little preparation to visit the club.
Rachel would typically use sophisticated and sexy dresses with plunging necklines and slits, or transparencies that suggested more than they showed. If she were there to have a private meeting with a sub, she would bring her costumes in a bag, keeping her most elegant side in the public environments. That night, however, she was wearing tight dark jeans, with a black silk shirt and ankle boots. She was yet more sexy, beautiful and elegant than most women Kitty knew, but she was casual, as if they were in a conventional bar or in one of the many trips they had made to practice extreme sports around the world.
"It's serious." She sighed, throwing herself into a chair. "It's pretty serious!"
"Spill it! You're making me worried." Harm said and Kitty agreed, nodding.
"My sub left me and it affected me... and it had never happened before."
"What do you mean with 'affected you'?" It was Kitty's turn of questioning.
"It really... affected me. It messed with me!" Her friends continued with a questioning semblance. "I... miss him." She breathed heavily. "I even cried." She added, really softly, burying her face in her hands.
"What?" She listened one of them ask, not by surprise, but because they not even heard her.
"I fucking cried!" She shouted. "I just started crying like crazy, totally uncontrollably, after he left." Her two friends looked at each other, while Rachel kept her eyes glued to the carpeted floor.
"You're in love." Harmony said, carefully.
"WHAT?" Berry screamed again. "No, I can't!" She shook her head, denying it, nervously. "I can't. I just can't!" She continued denying and stood up, walking from one side to the other. "I did everything right! I didn't let him kiss me... I... I didn't let him call me by my first name ... I didn't sleep with him... I know almost nothing about him." Then she stopped and looked at Kitty. "I did everything how we learned here... I swear!"
"Rachel, you don't need to swear anything to us... I believe you followed the rules." The blonde said. "And even if you hadn't, you have no such obligation, and we would never criticize you!"
"But I followed them!"
"I know, honey." Kitty got up and took Rachel's hand, leading her to a chair so she could sit down again. "I believe you, because I know how important it was for you to stay in control." She continued. "But all these little rules... not kissing, avoiding fondling and conversations, and everything else... are to try and keep the submissive and the dominant in their correct position, TRYING to avoid involvement, because feelings can make the roles no longer so clearly defined. "
"And I followed all of them, exactly because I need our roles very well defined." She reinforced, afflicted.
"Yes, but didn't you hear me? I said TRYING!" She said and looked at the brunette, that seemed confused. "Rachel, we are human beings! Even if you follow a lot of rules and try to protect yourself, you can always like someone... fall in love with someone."
"This couldn't have happened." She said, no more contradicting it. She felt a lump in her throat and tears wanting to fall from her eyes.
"Why did he leave, Rach?" Harmony asked, approaching and holding her friend's hands affectionately. "Did you tell him you were falling for him and..."
"No!" Rachel interrupted her, when the question was not even finished. "No, quite the contrary. He kissed me and then..."
So Rachel talked with the girls about all the details: how she had invited a boy who had never been a submissive to be one, how much he had changed over time, everything he had said before leaving her house and his dismissal request, and finally how she was feeling bad for not having him as her submissive anymore, after spending the best months of her life without being aware of it.
"I don't know what to do without him." She said lastly. "But I don't know how to handle being in love! I never wanted that for my life... and it freaks me out!"
"Rachel, Finn is not your stepfather... and for everything you told about him, he is not even a bit like your stepfather." Harmony said.
"Sorry, Harm, I know you wanna help, but... it's different for you! You were raised by loving parents that are married until today. Your mom and dad always took care of everything together... the two of them working, both present in their children lives. Your father supported your decision to go to the army. He's almost a feminist." She laughed, but then resumed the serious tone. "You're so well settled that what you come here to play at being a sex object."
Harmony didn't become upset with Rachel, and even understood her. Indeed, for her, it was more a matter of having a place to be feminine, where men would see her as a woman, and not as a superior whose orders they should obey or as a subordinate for whom to give orders. She wanted to be able to look pretty, wear makeup and cheerful clothes, and she thought sexual games were pretty cool, but only this. They didn't represented a refuge or protection for her. She was really okay in her own skin, to the point that, unlike her friends who have always been only domineering, she had already played the two roles between four walls. Maybe she was underestimating Rachel's problem, so she just preferred to hold her hands stronger and caress them.
"For I agree with Harm." It was Kitty's turn to speak. "Finn is none of those dangerous and idiotic sexists who passed through our lives. If you fell in love with him, and he's in love with you, maybe it's time for you to stop hiding here, Rach."
"And do what? Have a relationship with him? Date him?" She questioned, as if speaking of something extremely absurd.
"And why not, hon? Maybe life is giving you a unique chance."
"You're telling me this because it is not with you." Rachel affirmed, indignant.
"No." Kitty countered, serious. "Actually, I'm telling you this because I wanted it to happen with me." She saw Berry wide eyed. "I don't want this life anymore, Rachel. I like sex toys and plays, and I think I'll always like to dress this way, from time to time." She laughed. "But I don't want a relationship where I command someone else... in fact, there's already some time I don't want it."
"But how?"
"I fell for a sub too, but I didn't have your luck... and he didn't fall for me." She shrugged. "That was when I saw that, while I invest in this type of relationship, I'll be investing in not getting involved... and I wanna love, wanna have a family one day."
"In theory I agree with you, but... I have FEAR! Men scare me." She gasped.
"Rach, I was also afraid for a long time! I understand you. But therapy and socializing with friends showed me that not every man is like Bob." She said, referring to the brother of a classmate who had sexually abused her when she was entering adolescence.
"You have a choice to make, my dear." Harmony dared to rejoin the conversation. "You are the only one who can decide whether to face the fear... or lose Finn and continue living a superficial life."
"Yeah, because it's clear that he wants you." Kitty nodded. "But he wants you whole... and not just a small part of you."
What her friends said made Rachel thoughtful for the rest of the night, while they took a few drinks and talked about other issues, such as Harmony's recent promotion to colonel and an exam that Kitty, being a veterinary, had made in a lion in the previous week, which only did Rachel think about Finn, and the new cage they had planned to use together often and now seemed doomed to become obsolete.
It was about half past eleven when they left the club and it was only midnight and ten when Rachel reached a low and old building, located in one of the few fully residential neighborhoods of Philadelphia. It was very different from the skyscraper where she lived, located closer to Market Street, where were also the offices of her company. It reminded her the place where she had grown up, but it especially called her attention for having the same unpretentious charm of the person she had gone to see there.
It was not so difficult to get the address, unless you consider it hard to wake up the guy that works for you as chauffeur and security, making him go to the car, parked several floors below, to search a record in its GPS. It was even easier to get there, having a car like hers also with a global positioning system available. What would be probably complicated was the conversation she would have with the resident of apartment 202.
Finn took some time to answer the intercom call, because he thought he was hallucinating or that someone had accidentally touched its bell button. At the insistence, however, he walked up to the equipment, rubbing his eyes and yawning. He had just fall asleep and was cursing at least the next three generations of whoever was calling to his apartment, because it had been very difficult falling asleep and he could foresee that, after speaking, there would be hours of insomnia and thoughts about Rachel again, like in the previous evening.
The boy at first doubted his own ears, when the person who had called identified herself, claiming to be Rachel, but he pushed the button that would open the gate of the building, because the voice was no doubt hers, and then he went from confused and sleepy to worried. Why would she go to that point of the city, specially at that hour of the night, to speak to him? What could be so urgent?
"Rachel, what happened? What are you doing here?" He asked, without hesitation, when she finally appeared in front of his open door.
"Can I come in?" She asked, more humbly than usual.
"Sure! Excuse me." He stepped aside and pointed with one of his arms inward.
"What is this, Finn?" She questioned rhetorically, showing him the letter of request of resignation he sent to personal department, when he closed the door and turned toward her. "You don't need to..."
"Of course I do!" He was quick to interupt. "Wont you ever understand that I need to get away from you?" He roiled up.
"I don't accept it, Finn!" She replied gravely. "I DO NOT accept your resignation."
"Don't accept?" He laughed wryly. "Do you know that request is just a way of saying, right? This letter is a warning... and I have every right not to work for someone I don't want to work with, right?"
"Wrong!" She insisted. "Completely wrong! You're a great employee and will continue working in my company." She challenged, dangerously approaching him, who did not understand anything! Was she thinking that she could seduce him and make him continue being her employee in the company and also her sub? If that was what made her go to his house, she was wrong and wasting her time! He was slow to make a decision, but now that he had done it, he would not go backpedal.
"I told you, Rach." He not even realized the nickname escaping, with her hands resting lightly on his chest and her eyes fixated in his, with a different glow that was not the one full of malice they used to have. "I already explained that I need to get away from you."
"That's another thing that I..." She breathed and filled herself with a courage she didn't know she had. "I can't accept, Finn." She said, standing on her toes as high as she could, and pulling his neck to glue her lips to his once more.
This time, they experienced together the longest seconds of their lives. He for not knowing exactly what meant Rachel's initiative, and she for not having a clue about what kind of reaction she might expect from him, after everything that had happened between them.
Oh, God! She kissed him! What do you think will happen next?