I had the day off. Hawke was gone to the Wounded coast so I spent the day with Merrill. I thought she would appreciate the company. We spent the day walking and shopping all over Kirkwall. It was getting late in the day when we passed the Hanged Man.

"Kat, we could eat here for dinner. Have you had their stew yet? It's very delicious. Some people don't really like it on account of not knowing what the mystery meat is."

"If you want to go in we can. I don't have a problem with it."

"Maybe Varric will be around and we can listen to some good stories."

We entered the Hanged Man. It was still mostly empty at this time of day. The real business wouldn't pick up until later. Merrill went to the counter to order us some food. In the mean time I looked down the corridor to Varric's palatial suite. The door was open so I made my way to the door.

Once I got closer I was able to see a red headed guard sitting at the table with Varric. I studied her uniform closely without letting myself be seen. I would have probably thought that this was an ordinary guard, but I had heard tales of the Ferelden guard captain. Is Varric paying everyone off?

It wasn't long until Merrill came up behind me holding a bowel in each hand. "Go on in. Varric won't mind. Oh and look Aveline is here."

I took one of the bowels from Merrill and followed her in. I sat beside her as we joined the others.

"Hello Daisy, What brings you here?"

"Kat and I decided to have supper and listen to one of your stories."

"Which one I wonder?"

Aveline quickly answered, "That guard story of yours. The… the one with the guardsman who falls in love with the templar knight-captain.

"Oh, the romance! Swords and Shields. I just started that serial. It's got ten chapters to go."

"Yes, but you know how it ends! Just tell me."

"I've got an idea, but the story...the story will go where it wants to go. The characters drive it, not me."

Aveline seemed pretty annoyed, "You're the author! That makes no sense at all!"

"A good story, you don't really write. It was always there. You just uncover it."

It was a good change of pace; to see Varric picking on someone other than me. I guess it's just his way of showing you he cares.

Varric took a drink from his cup. He seemed quite pleased with himself. I started to enjoy my stew as I watched the comradery between what appeared to by long time friends.

Merrill suggested the next story. "I want to hear more about the one you started for me."

"I don't remember Daisy. Why don't you tell me how it went, to jog my memory?"

Merrill laid down her spoon from eating and her eyes began to sparkle. I loved the way she would get so into the things she liked.

"It's the one with the moody rebel mage with the feathered pauldrons who falls in love with the mysterious Lady Katherine who has a dual identity she's keeps hidden from him. You were just at the part where Lady Katherine was kidnapped by pirates and I wanted to know if he was going to save her."

I was in the middle of taking a slurp of soup and just about spit it everywhere. I managed to not too, but still had the stew running down my chin.

Varric saw my reaction and smiled with satisfaction. "I'm afraid it's too soon to tell anything with that story as well."

Merrill seemed down. Aveline tried to lift her spirit or at least that's what I think she was trying to do. Maker she was bad at it! She didn't seem very good at that sort of thing, "Don't worry Merrill. Knowing Varric he'll just kill one of the characters off and disappoint you."

Merrill looked back at Varric with her puppy dog eyes, "Really?"

Varric shrugged his shoulders, "Well, it's not a good story unless the hero dies."

That horrible! My mouth fell open at his comment. Merrill however, was quick to argue. "Please don't Varric. I want a happy ending."

"Well for you Daisy, I'll see what I can do."

After Merrill and I finished our stew, Merrill decided to leave. "It's getting late. I'm going to go wait on Hawke. He should be home soon right?"

Merrill left the Hanged Man presumably to head to Hawke's estate in Hightown. She had been heading there more and more as time went on.

That left me in the room with guard captain and the dwarf. Aveline was now looking at me suspiciously. "I don't think we've met."

"No, we haven't."

"So who is she Varric? One of yours."

"One of mine? What's that suppost to mean?"

"You know what I mean! Why is it you never give a straight answer."

"Where's the fun in that. If you want to know so badly just ask her."

Aveline seem to sit straighter in her chair, "Alright, do you work for Varric?"

I looked at Varric. I kept my face as straight as I could. I knew he was playing some sort of game. He was always playing some angle. "I do work for Varric, yes."

Aveline slammed a palm to the table, "I knew it."

"If you knew it, why'd you ask? Besides, all you know it that I work for Mr. Tethras. You didn't ask what I do."

Aveline was taken aback for a moment. "Okay… So maybe you're not one of Varric's spies."

"Would one of Varric's spies know that Hawke is on the Wounded coast with Isabella, Fenris, and Anders today? They're looking for some treasure box Isabella lost or something."

She cocked an eyebrow, "Well yes… A spy would know something like that."

"Well, it's not like it's a secret. Hawke told me yesterday that's where he'd be."

Varric chuckled at her expense."Maybe I wasn't obvious about this already, but finding out things I'm not supposed to know is pretty much what I do. And who says I need spies to do it?"

It still didn't prove whether or not I was one of Varric's informants. But that was the game; Varric's game. It was fun to be on the winning side. And Aveline didn't seen upset about Varric using her for a laugh. She must have known him for a long time now and be used to it. She sat back in her chair and sighed, "You said Anders is with him. Well that's at least good news. Having that abomination out of the city for awhile is always a comfort."

With that comment she piqued my interest. I could feel my temper rising and knew I had to defend my master, "Why would you say that? Anders is a great person and a great mage."

"I don't really have a problem with Anders. I just never know when the demon will over take him. He's a potential danger just stewing down there in Darktown."

"You don't know him! He's caring and thoughtful and dedicated in his beliefs."

"Oh… and you know him that well?"

"Better than you, apparently."

Aveline leaned forward in her seat to eye me closer, "I've known Anders for years."

I could feel my blood boil. I tried to sound as snotty as I could, "Strange, I never see him with you. And yet you claim to be his friend."

"So you spend a lot of time with him do you?"

"More than you."

Aveline rose to her feet with all the grace and authority one would expect from her position, "Funny, I've never heard of you."

I rose to my feet to stand level with her, knocking my back in my haste. I wanted to show he I wasn't backing down, "Oh really! I highly doubt that."

Aveline didn't seem impressed at my aggression. She shook her head patronizingly like speaking to a child.

"I'm Lady Katherine!"

And there it was. In a moment of anger I yelled it out. In two seconds I was exposed. It was out there and I couldn't take it back.

Aveline narrowed her eyes, "Lady Katherine is a cat."

I fumbled for words. My lips moved, but no sound came out. While a small part of me wanted to smile. So, he does talk about me.

Varric intervened to my rescue."Now, now ladies. There's no reason to get upset. I'm sure there's a perfectly logical lie to explain all of this."

I'm not sure when Isabella returned, but she was at Varric's door. I had been so focused on Aveline I didn't notice her presents until she spoke, "Varric how could you. You know you're not supposed to interrupt a cat fight. Especially when both of the participants are such fiery red heads."

I was in no mood for Isabella's teasing. I took the opportunity to vacate the room as soon as possible. I ran passed her and out of the Hanged man.

I'm such an impulsive idiot. I can't believe I blew my own cover. And for what? because I was angry. She wasn't worth it. Emma was right, I don't think before I react. I'm always getting myself into trouble.

I figured I would have to run again. I decided to flip a coin; head- Starkhaven, tails- Cumberland.

I should have known not to get too attached. Hot tears trickled down my face. This was my own fault. I should have remembered; apostates don't have homes. They only have places to hide.

I walked aimlessly while I pondered my future. Before I knew it my feet lead me to Darktown right outside Anders's Clinic. I knew he was inside. If Isabella was already back at the Hanged Man he was already back here.

I stood far enough away to watch him. I wondered if he would miss me if I was gone. And if he did would he miss the girl he met once or the cat.

I clutched the necklace with my name on it. I should at least say good bye. Of course cats don't really say good bye. So I'll just see him one last time.

I transformed to my cat self where no one could see and walked into the clinic. I jumped to my box and watched Anders at his table. He reached over and patted me on the head.

Time seem to pass so slowly with him. After a while I had almost forgotten about the trouble I got myself into just hours before. It wasn't until I saw Hawke, Varric, and Aveline walk through the door that I remembered and felt a wave of dread fall upon my shoulders.

This was it; time to leave. I left my box and hastily made my way to the door. Aveline made a move toward me. She blocked the way and forced me to stop.

"It's okay, Lady Katherine, I have something for you."

In Aveline's hand she held out something wrapped. She walked to the tin bowel on the ground and unwrapped the parchment. I could smell the gravy on the mutton she placed in my bowel.

She then turned to me in a hushed voice meant only for my ears.

"Varric explained things after you left. I've had some time to think about it. And well it's not such a bad thing to have an extra pair of eyes on him. I can't get my guardsmen down here often enough without raising suspicions and if Anders saw them he would get upset; making things worse. I guess what I'm trying to say is… you don't have to worry. I'll keep your secret. It's a good thing that you're here; for Anders and for Kirkwall."

I was surprised to get such praise from her. I didn't think I left her with a good first impression. She must be more reasonable than I thought. She was patient with Varric. And understanding of my position. Maybe there was more to the story than I knew. Aveline seemed to be very …reasonable.

I turned my attention back to Anders who was now discussing something with Hawke.

"Come with me tonight, please. Help me find evidence of Ser Alrik's 'Tranquil Solution'."

Hawke answered, "I wouldn't let you face this alone."

It warmed my heart to know that Anders's friends would help him out with just about anything.

Anders continued, "I've always feared being made Tranquil, now more than ever. I'm ready to go when you are. Our entrance is concealed not far from here."

Hawke left the Clinic with Anders, Aveline, and Varric. Leaving me to wonder; maybe Anders was a different person around his friends?

I guess there's no real harm in following. Varric told me I didn't have to worry about him when they were out. Of course that didn't mean not to follow.

I scampered behind the group as Anders lead them to the same entrance to the Gallows that we had used. I had been in these same tunnels so many times the dark atmosphere no longer seemed troubling. I knew my way around easily and in some cases took alternative routes so not to be seen. They were always within ear shot so I would knew where they were.

I could hear the conversation between Anders and Varric that started with a particularly interesting comment from Varric, "If you've got something to say, just spit it out."

"Are you sure you want to encourage me? I might be about to confess my undying love."

"I get that a lot. So what's on your mind?"

"I just realized it's been a while since any of the gangs in the Undercity came to my door."

"They're busy people. Places to go, throats to cut. Maybe you've slipped their minds."

"Right. The apostate running the free clinic in the sewers. Easy to forget. You didn't have anything to do with this?"

"You must have me confused with someone else! I'm just a businessman and a storyteller."

When I got to the open room that opened to the Gallows I started to hear people speaking. I must have gotten there first. As I looked around the room there were a group of templars and a mage girl, but not any of Anders's party.

A young mage girl pleaded, "No… please! I haven't done anything wrong."

There was an older templar there, "That's a lie. What do we do with mages who lie?" His light blue eyes seemed judgmental and menacing.

The girl spoke again, "I just wanted to see my mom. No one ever told her where they were taking me."

My heart sank as I had flashes of my mother pop into my head. I would have done the same thing in her position. Heck, I'd done the same thing in her position.

I then watch as Anders and Hawke joined the fray. Anders seemed more than upset. He seemed to almost glow for a moment and shyed away from what was going on. Must have been the lighting?

The templar teased on in his cruelty, "So you admit your attempted escape? You know what happens to mage girls that don't toe the line around here, don't you?"

Now I was angry. I could see nothing wrong with her actions. From all accounts she could easily have been me. It's not like she didn't come back. I'd hardly what I would call an escape attempt.

The girl fell to her knees and begged, "Please! No! Don't make me Tranquil. I'll do anything."

"That's right. Once your Tranquil you'll do anything I ask."

I couldn't take this anymore. I wanted to jump from my hiding place and claw the old man's eyes out.

Hawke's voice did little to console me, "The Chantry frowns on those who take personal advantage of their charges."

It may not have been the intervention I wanted, but it did help me realize I could do nothing from my current position. It also alerted the man to the presents of others.

Then it happened, Anders body sparked and crackled with a weird glowing light. The pressure in the room increased causing my limbs to feel heavy. I felt my stomach fall and every hair on my body rise. He stepped forward and spoke in a voice unlike his own, "You fiends will never touch a mage again!"

After that he stepped forward and the all of the templars around took defensive positions. Hawke, Varric, and Aveline all came to Anders aid as the battle started.

I would have to wait until the battle was over before I could leave. The four made a great team and quickly subdue the templars. It was then that Anders continued on his rampage while his friends had put their weapons away.

"They will die! I will have every last templar for these abuses!"

Hawke pleased with Anders to calm down, "It's over, Anders. There all dead."

"Every one of them will feel Justice's burn."

The girl called out, 'get away from me you demon."

It was a sentiment I would have been too scared to say, but was thinking myself. I had never thought Anders to be an abomination, but he certainly looked possessed. He was just as Aveline had said.

In anger Anders approached the girl, "I am no demon? Are you one of them that would call me such?"

Hawke tried to console Anders one more to no avail, "You're out of control, Anders."

"I will have my vengeance."

After those words were spoken I watched in horror as Anders proceed to strike down the mage. She went down easy. She didn't fight back at all. She just cowered in front of him. She was not a threat. She was the reason he was fighting. The reason he fought every day. She was a mage.

I panicked and I ran. I ran away as fast as I could. I let my fear take hold of me and used it to my advantage. I didn't stop until I was in Darktown.

I stopped then to catch my breath. Once I felt like myself again I witnessed Hawke going to Anders's Clinic. I didn't know what to do at a time like this, but I knew Hawke did. So I turned my back and went to Lowtown.

I breathed a heavy sigh while I stood in front of Merrill's door. I knocked. No one answered. I used the key Merrill had given me so I could let me self in. It was a bit of a relief to know she wasn't home. I could be alone with my thoughts.

I entered the dark room and looked at the embers in the fire place. I stirred them with a poker and the flames sprang to life. The fire in front of me was no comfort. I still felt chilled by what I had seen.

Leaving was always an option. I could disappear just like all the times before. But this time I would be leaving a home with friends and a job. Hawke didn't leave. Hawke knew the whole time what Anders was. I could probably assume every one of Anders's friends knew. They didn't leave. Even after an outburst like that Hawke when straight to Anders's side.

I won't go. I had to help him anyway I could.

As the fire roared in front of me I thought of every spell I knew. Every spell I had heard about and any spell there could be.

I remembered back to my time in the Circle. I was very young. I pulled a large book from behind a large bookcase. I was dust covered and forgotten. Leather bound with a picture of the sun. I remember opening the pages and not understanding a single word. I held that book close to my chest. I wanted to know everything in it. It was like a drug. I had to know its secrets. I craved that book.

When the Enchanter saw me with the book he took it away from me. He said that I was too young. When I was older I looked for the book, even asked about the book. I combed the library. I never found it. I assumed he put it away in his office. I desired that book.

I later learned as I was older that the sun on the front was a symbol of the Tevinter Imperium. The words inside were more than likely Arcanum. Ancient magic. Forgotten magic. Dark magic.

I immediately started writing a letter to my sister.

Dear Emma,

I need your help. I have need for a particular book which I believe is in the Senior Enchanter's office. He might have it locked away. It's leather bound and old. On the cover is a shield emblazed with a yellow sun. I need you to bring the book to Kirkwall. It shouldn't be a problem for you. All you need to do it ask for leave to study outside the Circle. Father will give you leave. You can even bring along a templar to accompany you. I might suggest that one that fancies you. Bring the book to the Hanged Man. Speak to a dwarf named Varric Tethras. He will be able to find me.

Your sister,

Kat

Author's note: Sorry for not having three chapters for you like usual. The holidays ate my time. It may happen again with Christmas coming. Just to warn you.

Thank you every one who is reading. And Melgonzo for commenting and reading. I thought when I started this that it would have to be just for me. It's nice to know that other people are enjoying it.