All recognizable characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

A/N- This is for all who were wondering where Edward was. I have gotten a lot of e-mails concerning this….so…here you go. No I will not tell you what he and Carlisle are doing. That's for the sequel…maybe.

E POV

I sat down on the piano bench very much at home. I slowly raised my hands to rest them on the keys and played the first song that came to mind. It was one that I had composed a while ago, one of my favorites. As the song drifted to an end I glanced over at Bella to see if she was enjoying it. She stood up against the wall as far from me as possible with her eyes closed. I couldn't fault her for keeping her distance. I couldn't blame her for fearing me and hating me after what I had done. She was smiling a very content yet beautiful smile, and seemed relaxed for the first time. She really was quite beautiful, even before…there was something about her that stood out. She was so vulnerable and for some reason I felt the need to protect her.

I wondered what she was thinking. She was such a mystery to me. Never in my existence had I been presented with such a challenge. It would be so much easier to help her and know what to do if I knew what she was thinking. Maybe I wasn't concentrating hard enough. I opened my mind then to the world around me searching for anything that might give me a glimpse into her mind. Frowning, I gave up. I vowed then and there to find a way into her mind.

She slowly opened her eyes and looked at me. There was fear in her eyes and her body stiffened. Why was she scared? Had I done something? Before I could ask what was wrong she quickly turned and went to her room. I dropped my head into my hands sighing. She hated me that was clear, and I deserved her abhorrence. There must be some way for us to work together. I stood slowly making my way to her room. I would have to reason with her and find some sort of middle ground, or this was going to be a very long few months.

Once I reached her room I gently knocked on her door. She seemed confused by my presence, but let me in. Instantly I apologized for scaring her in any way, and tried to make it clear that she was welcome in this house. She still looked flustered and I became even more frustrated that I could not know what she was thinking.

Annoyed, I ran my hand through my hair and tried to think of some way to make her at least be able to tolerate being around me. I explained that I knew how she felt and understood, but we still needed to work together.

She seemed even more confused by my confession and her faced twisted with anger and bewilderment. I couldn't help but ask what she was thinking. Her response caught me off guard.

"You're the one who doesn't like me. You were so mean to me my first day in Forks. You always look at me funny and are frowning. I say how upset you were when Carlisle said you were the one who had to stay with me. I don't understand what I did to make you hate me so much. I've barley ever even talked to you." She said bitterly crossing her hands across her chest.

She thought I hated her. How could she think such a thing? My mind was spinning. I couldn't figure her out. She never thought or did anything she was supposed to, that any normal person would. I dropped my head and took a deep breath. I had to make her understand that I did not, could not hate her. It was my fault in every way. I hated myself not her, never her.

"Bella I don't hate you. I'm sorry for how I acted your first day here. I was over come by your scent and I hated you for smelling so irresistible. I know it's illogical, and truthfully it was myself who I really hated. I hated what I was and how I was unable to resist your blood. Please understand that it was never you, it was always me. I'm sorry for the life I damned you to." I whispered. I was ashamed of how I acted.

She actually thought I was upset that Carlisle put her in my charge. Truthfully I was thankful not to have to endure High School any longer. I was curious to get to know her and figure out how her mind worked. I was not upset at all, merely disgusted with myself.

"I was not upset with you, or with the task that was given me. I should be thanking you for saving me from High School hell." I chuckled, "I was just feeling guilty for what I had done to you. I am so sorry for what I have done." I looked intently into her eyes trying to make her understand how sincere and sorry I truly was. Our eyes held for the longest time and I promised myself that I would make it up to her somehow.

She surprised me by offering her hand to me, wanting to start fresh. I willing accepted her hand and eagerness to start anew. It was a start, and she wasn't running away for once. I was amazed at her willingness to forgive. She truly was a unique individual.

I was curious to know if she had any questions or concerns for me. She had spent most of her time since her change alone in her room, and she must be questions. I was right, for once it would seem.

Most of the questions she had were easy to answer. When she asked about her family, I tried to keep the sorrow from my eyes. It pained me to not be able to give her the answer she needed and wanted. The truth was she might never see them again. I could see the hurt in her face as that realization sunk in before she dropped her head hiding as she began playing with a piece of her hair. She took a deep breath and what she said next would forever haunt me.

"I just wish I had gotten the chance to say goodbye." She whispered her voice laced with grief. I wanted to tell her how sorry I was. I wanted to take her pain away. I was so filled with guilt and disgust for what I had done to her. She deserved better. She deserved a normal happy human life. She deserved better than this half-life I had damned her to.

She excused herself to shower, clearly needing to be alone. I welcomed the chance to get away. I went to my room and sank down on my couch running my hand through my hair. What kind of monster was I? I could hear her sobbing in her room and I felt the need to get away. I needed to escape, but I couldn't leave her alone. I wanted to hold her as I did in the woods, and tell her everything would be ok; even if it wasn't the truth. Not that I thought she would ever want me to ever hold her again. I decided to read a book to distract myself. I grabbed the closets book to me and opened it to a random location. I didn't matter where I started I had read everything in my room once before, and would have no problem following the story.

As I finished the first page Bella was at me door knocking loudly. I put my book down bracing myself for what was to come. I didn't really know what to expect, but knew she probably needed more answers and comforting.

She flung my door open visibly excited. I was stunned and bewildered by her sudden mood change. She wanted to go running, now. I would have agreed to almost anything to see her smile again. I decided to take her to a special place of mine. It would require a decent run to get there, had an amazing view, and most importantly was far from humans.

I made her wait on the porch while I got my car. The ride was relatively quiet and I couldn't help glancing at her occasionally. What had caused her mood change? What was she thinking? She was so intriguing and yet frustrating at the same time. She caught me looking her way a few times, and I could tell she was starting to get aggravated with me. Her face was amusing. She looked so endearing when she was upset, but I hid my amusement from her. I didn't want to trouble her. Unfortunately, when I was not honest about my reasons for looking her way I upset her anyway. She was so easy to anger, and it was entertaining to watch her reactions.

She was a terribly curious individual. It was obvious that her talent allowed her to know if people were lying or telling the truth. When I pointed this fact out it opened the floodgates to an entire discussion about talents. I was hesitant to tell her what my ability was, and the horror on her face when I did tell her was unmistakable. I quickly tried to comfort her, not wanting to upset her further. I let her know I could not read her mind. She seemed quite relieved, and I couldn't help but laugh.

We arrived at our location and I went to her side of the car to grab her hand. It felt strangely pleasant to hold her like that. She seemed confused and I explained that I would be leading her somewhere. As we began to run I couldn't help stealing glances at her. She seemed so free. Her long brown hair whipped behind her, and I watched as she closed her eyes taking in the scents around her. She looked so peaceful and elated to be out in the open. I couldn't help but smile.

I was excited to see how she would react to the valley and as we stopped I held back to better see her face. I was struck with her beauty as her face lit up at the sight. I slowly made my way to a near by rock never taking my eyes off her, and sat down. She was so small and appeared so fragile. It was so easy to be with her and there was nowhere else I would rather be. She came to sit next to me clearly still taken with beauty around her.

After a few moments of quiet I looked over at her from the corner of my eye to see her lost in thought. What I wouldn't give to know what she was thinking. I mulled over all the possibilities until I finally realized it was hopeless to guess. Bella was unlike anyone I had ever known. She pulled me from my train of thoughts with her next question.

"Why can't you read my mind? I mean does that happen often?"

I glanced at her and smirked. "No you are the first person whose mind I have ever not been able to read, and I do not know why." I frowned and continued, "It's incredibly frustrating."

She laughed in reply, causing me to become more annoyed as my frown deepened.

"Now you know how the rest of us feel." She responded with a friendly smile.

I grunted in response. I could see her trying to hold her amusement in.

"You never did tell me why you were not being honest with me in the car." She questioned. I was beginning to learn that she never let anything go. Nothing seemed to escape her notice.

I sighed and turned to look at her. "You know your little talent is not very fair. I was glancing at you wondering what brought about the sudden mood change. First you were crying then you were jumping up and down with excitement. I was just trying to figure out why."

"Oh." She said deep in thought. I tried to be patient for her to reply, but she never did.

"So are you going to tell me or not?" I said anxiously. She would be the death of me.

"I just realized that my life as I knew it was gone. It made me sad so I cried, but you have to move on and accept reality. This is my life now and I need to recognize that. I was listing all the positives about my new life when I started to think about running. It made me want to run and I got excited about the possibility of running again. It is such an amazing feeling."

"It is invigorating." I said stunned yet again by one of her answers. It was getting late and we needed to leave. "Come we should get back now before the others start to worry."

We drove home in relative silence. Once we got to the house I dropped her off out front and returned my car to the garage. I needed to be alone away from the thoughts of my family. I needed to think. I began running with out a destination. I let my feet be my guide. My head was whirling from all the emotions I was feeling. I didn't understand a most of them. Never in my life had I felt the need to protect and comfort someone as much as I did Bella. The thought of anyone hurting her caused such rage to course through me it was blinding. I longed for her company and her closeness. She was a constant surprise, and was so frustrating, yet she was like a drug I couldn't get enough of. I was addicted to her. I didn't see her as a sister as I had Rosalie, there was more somehow. I didn't know what, or how to explain it. I was drawn to her and eager to hear her opinions on everything. She never did what I expected. She was so unique, more than just unique she was special. She was the most caring forgiving person I had ever known.

I stopped then realizing where I was. I was at her father's house. Why I had run here I did not know. I felt an acute pain of guilt as I thought about how I had ripped her from the life she so richly deserved. I was not worth her acceptance or forgiveness. There was no possible way she could ever feel anything for me besides possible friendship. In a moment of weakness I had damned her to a life of darkness. I dropped my head and shook it slowly from side to side; I was a monster in the true sense of the word. She was too extraordinary to ever be with one such as I. How could I have done such a thing? Why wasn't I stronger? How could she ever really forgive me for what I have done? I realized then that I had no right to feel anything towards her after all the hurt I had caused her. I had treated her so badly from the first moment our eyes met. I swore to myself that I would make it up to her somehow as I turned away from her father's house and began to run through the night.

I ran for hours without stopping trying to understand my feelings. It was impossible to ignore them no matter how hard I tried. I wanted nothing more than to go back to how things were when life was simple, and had everything figured out. I was alone, yes, but happy. I was complete in and of myself. The day Bella moved to Forks my world had been turned upside down instantly. I was not used to having so many emotions at once. Most of these emotions were so foreign to me it was unnerving. My family knew something was going on, and Esme hoped for something that would never be, that Bella would be my mate. I knew only two things for sure; I was happier and more miserable than I had ever been since Bella had entered my life.