God's Gift

Being in a relationship didn't mean changing what Edward and I already had an awful lot. We still went on dates. We still engaged in epically hot make-out sessions.

In fact all that was different was that Edward looked pretty damn pleased with himself a lot of the time.

One Thursday night, when I was working at Moonlight, I was taking my break when my cell rang. I took it out into the alley where I chained up my bike and Garrett's car was parked.

"Hello?"

"Bella? It's Emmett. Edward's brother."

"Hi Emmett, Edward's brother." I said, leaning against the wall, "What's up?"

"I, uh…" He sighed heavily, the line crackling, "I need your help. With Rosalie."

"What about Rosalie? What did you do?" My eyes narrowed, "I swear to God, if you've upset her, I'm going to hunt you down with a rusty spoon and-"

"Jesus, woman!" I could hear him cringing, "I didn't do anything! At least… I don't think I did."

"What's going on?"

Kate appeared in the alley, also taking her break, and lit up a cigarette. She waved the packet in my direction but I shook my head. I hadn't smoked since I was a teen.

"OK, so Rosalie and I had a really good talk when Edward and I came to see you at the coffee place, right? And we exchanged numbers. We've texted back and forward a lot and we've talked a little. I really want to ask her out but… I can't get a read on her. She's so…"

"She's shy, Emmett." I said, watching the ash fall from the tip of Kate's cigarette, "You can't just ask her out suddenly. She'll freeze up and I mean that literally. The last time a guy asked her out in a bar, she just stood there and stared at him for about a minute and a half until he walked away."

"So what do I do?" I could hear the frustration in his voice.

"Are you working tomorrow?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"I'll come and see you in the office around lunch." I wanted to do this face to face. He might have been Edward's brother but I didn't know the guy and I wasn't going to set him up with my best friend until I'd gotten a good read on him.

Emmett's office was the same floor as Edward's but off to the right of the elevator instead of in front. I wondered about calling in to see Edward but his assistant, Clark Kent a.k.a Tyler was on the phone and looking incredibly harassed so I steered off towards Emmett's office.

He was on the phone, feet up on the desk as he tossed a baseball up and down. He didn't appear to be speaking English but grinned at the sight of me, waving me to the office. There was an open packet of salted peanuts on his desk and I leaned forward to grab a few. Emmett pretended to scowl and I winked, chewing on them.

He said goodbye or at least I think he did because he hung up.

"What language was that?"

"Mandarin Chinese." He leaned forward and tossed a handful of nuts into his mouth before straightening up and placing the baseball on his desk, smiling at me, "Thanks for coming, Bella."

"Emmett…" I arched my fingers and looked over them at him, doing my best Monty Burns impression, "What are your intentions with my Rosalie?"

Emmett broke into laughter and I narrowed my eyes.

"I can't help but feel that you're not taking me seriously, Emmett."

"You're so cute. I want to pinch your cheeks." Emmett beamed and I scowled.

"Emmett, we need to be serious. Rosalie is a special girl and if I don't approve of you, consider your chances blown." I warned him and he cleared his throat, lacing his fingers on the desk in front of him.

"OK. I'm serious."

"Good. Now, like I said, Rosalie is shy. She doesn't see that she's a total knockout and most of the guys that go for her are total jackasses. Hence the majority of her ex-boyfriends have been total jackasses."

I thought about Royce, Rosalie's last boyfriend. He'd been absolutely doting at first and Rosalie had been delirious with Prince Fucking Charming. Until he'd become a possessive douchebag who had not only started showing up unannounced at her work and her home but reached such a level of obsessiveness that he actually threatened her when she tried to walk out during an argument.

And then he hit her.

At that point Rosalie locked herself in the bathroom of her apartment and called first the police, and then me.

That dick was just lucky that the police got there first. I still regret that I didn't get a chance to attack his balls with a cheese grater.

I didn't tell Emmett any of this. It wasn't my place but what he was going to know was that Rosalie deserved nothing but the best.

"Treat her like a princess. Rosalie is romantic. She falls hard for guys and if you're only interested in a quick fuck, then you're looking at the wrong girl." I warned Emmett and he held up his hands.

"I swear. I want to get to know her and I promise I'll treat her well."

I narrowed my eyes and then pulled out my cell, dialling Rosalie's number. I knew she was on her lunch break at school. Emmett leaned forward curiously.

"Hi Bella."

"Hey Rosie. Can I ask you a quick question?"

"Sure." She sounded distracted, "I can't talk long. I've got a parent-teacher conference after school and I'm trying to get a few things together."

"No worries," I grinned at Emmett, "I just wanted to see what was going on with you and Emmett."

She was silent and my smile widened as Emmett looked anxious, unable to hear her reply.

"Bella… this isn't really the time to talk about it."

"Well, do you like him? Tick yes or no."

"… Yes." She sounded embarrassed, "I mean… we've only texted a little but he seems really sweet. But we both know what my taste in men is like. Urgh… oh, I shouldn't say that, he's your boyfriend's brother. Wow, that's awkward."

"OK, let's have dinner tonight." I offered, "I'll bring wine and ice cream. Order something in and we'll talk about it properly."

"That sounds- shit! Oh god, I just dropped an entire jar of glitter on the carpet. Bella, I'll call you later." She hung up in a glitter-dazzled haze of despair.

I lowered my cell phone and looked across at Emmett, who was waiting in anticipation.

"What did she say?"

"…She thinks you're sweet." He fist pumped the air and I pulled a face, "What are you, seventeen? Grow up. Take her to dinner, somewhere romantic. Bring her flowers. The whole stereotypical movie-perfect date."

"So… as a basic rule of thumb, if you'd hate it, she'll love it." Emmett guessed and I winked at him with a cheesy grin.

"You got it."

"What's he got?" Edward's voice came from the door.

"Her heart. She's leaving you for me. It was inevitable really." Emmett leaned back in his chair, his hands behind his head. Edward smirked as he came into the room.

"Curse your betrayal… and with my own brother."

"What can I say? My life is a soap opera." I grinned up at him and Edward laughed, leaning down to kiss me.

"Do you have time for lunch?"

"That depends. What are we having?"

"There's a great sushi place around the corner." Edward offered and I nodded before looking back at Emmett, gesturing from my eyes to his.

"Watching you, Cullen. Treat my girl well."

"Only the best. And you have full permission to do whatever it was that you were threatening to do with that rusty spoon." Emmett promised.

"What was that about?" Edward asked as we got into the elevator.

"I'm giving relationship advice now."

"Really? You?" He smirked and I poked his cheek.

"Yes. We've been going out for, what, twenty minutes? I'm practically an expert at this shit."

Edward's arm slipped around my waist and he pulled me closer, brushing his mouth against mine.

"Maybe you can give me some advice then."

"Go on then. Test me." I laughed, leaning up to nip his lip.

"What do you think of a man taking the afternoon off from running a multi-million dollar company to hang out with his girlfriend?"

"A little needy. Luckily his girlfriend is really cool and can deal with it."

"Yes, she is." Edward agreed as the elevator opened on the ground floor and we stepped out. He moved over to the receptionist's desk, where a pretty girl smiled at him, totally flustered.

"May I use the phone, Bree?"

"Of course, Mr Cullen!" She positively gasped and he smiled, dialling the phone.

"Tyler? I'm going to be out for the rest of the afternoon. Emmett can handle the contracts. See you tomorrow."

Edward turned back to me, loosening his tie.

"Sushi? And how about a movie?"

"Sure. Just don't pick something like a rom-com or I'm calling this whole thing off." I threatened and Edward laughed, catching my hand with his as we left the building.

"And screw up my chances with a relationship expert like you? I'd be a fool."

"He's so freaking cute, Bella." Rosalie sighed, "He's like an enormous puppy dog."

"Bestiality isn't sexy, Rose." I warned and she rolled her eyes, topping up my wine glass.

"You know what I mean. Emmett is just… amazing. I don't know what's holding me back on this."

"I do." I looked at her pointedly, "You have fucking awful taste in men."

"Not with this one." She said stubbornly, digging into a pint of cookie-dough ice cream. I snatched the pot away before she could dig out all of the cookie-dough.

"Then go out with him. He wants it, you want it. What's the problem?"

I wiggled my spoon into the ice cream, loosening a chunk of dough before leaning back against the couch where Rosalie was lying, an episode of How I Met Your Mother providing background noise. After a takeout dinner of pizza, I'd brought up the subject of Emmett and the tell-tale blush in Rosalie's cheeks was more than enough to convince me of her thoughts on him.

Rosalie licked her spoon before shrugging awkwardly.

"What if… I don't know. After last time, with Royce… it just seems like I need to take a step back from men."

"You take any more steps back from men and you're bordering lesbian territory." I warned her, "Go out with him. Come on – you're always telling me to go out with men and it's actually seemed to work out this time. Give him a chance."

"Why does this feel like some bizarre Freaky Friday situation?" Rosalie said dryly before reaching over to take back the ice cream.

"Because I am now a relationship guru. I'm going to have business cards made up." I said with a shrug. She giggled before draining the last of her wine and stretching out on the couch.

"I can be your first client."

"Then as my client, I demand that you call him so that I can finish the ice cream before you take all the cookie dough out." I said, taking back the tub. I wasn't sure why we didn't just buy cookie dough. Neither of us really cared about the ice cream.

Rosalie's arm snaked around my shoulders and she hugged me tightly. She smelled of perfume and wine.

"You're the best friend ever, Bella."

"I'll put that on the business cards." I teased, smacking a kiss on her cheek.

"How about… we double date?" Rosalie asked uncertainly, "I could call and suggest it and then if things are really awkward, you could step in with cynicism and divert his attention."

"Good plan." I said, handing her the phone. "Call him."

As she dialled, I went into the kitchen to put the rest of the ice cream back in the freezer. I also took out my cell and texted Edward.

Rosalie is suggesting a double date with us and Emmett. Good plan?

Great plan. I'll book a table.

Don't go overboard, Cullen.

Would I ever? Goodnight, beautiful girl.

Damn it. If I didn't sleep with that man soon my ovaries were going to start a riot.

A/N: I won't bother apologising. Let's just universally agree that I suck at regular updating and I'll rehash the excuse that my job is super stressful and time consuming. Also, if you are a teacher, don't drop an entire jar of glitter onto a carpet. Your classroom ends up looking like a twilight vampire exploded in there and the children get hyper.

You guys, on the other hand, are incredibly awesome and supportive. I've bashed this chapter out because it wasn't one that I found particularly thrilling – next chapter, with the double date, will be more exciting. Promise!

TEW