The Insanity of Us

Chapter 11: It all makes sense now

A/N An awesomely obese thank you to JMai, Sirwayde X2, Illegitimi, miniwoo, WEIRDkittywwinz, inKSpiDeR, andalogia, bluengel-maggie, Iridescent Twilight, Pinay (X7 the awesomeness of you to review nearly every chap is awesome ) SoroNoMiko (X2)

Guys, I cannot thank you enough for your patience with me and this story. Real life makes writing harder for me and honestly, I didn't think I was built for it. But I was reading through all the great things you guys wrote in your reviews, and I got my act together and finished up this chap. The Insanity of Us is only about four chapters away from its end.

And I want to thank every one of you out there who waited for this, and every one of you who gave me support.

Thank you, more than you could possibly imagine.

Thank you.

Disclaimer: On some planet, far far away....it's mine...but here and now....well...I can't say it..but you get the idea.

The Insanity of Us

Chapter 11: It all makes sense now

As Sano would put it,

No shit Sherlock.

Aoshi must have developed Death's telepathic power as well because just as the thought flashed through my mind, one corner of his lips quirked a tiny little bit upwards; The normal human equivalent of holding your gut and laughing out your innards. Peachy mental imagery right there.

I smiled back.

"What are you doing here Shinimori?" We must have smiled at each other a micro second too long for Enishi's paper fine patience. Jealous? Nawww.

The lip-quirk faded as Aoshi's face returned to its normal blank wall display that screeched business. He spun around and walked up to the body curled up and unconscious on the wooden veranda. With a practiced ease, he tugged away the cloth face mask of the body. "The Oniwabanshu have been infiltrated."

Misao swore, something foreign sounding but acidic against the ears. Lee shifted seeming to actively push his paranoia another notch. Enishi just became really, really still. Which was always a bad sign when it came to the constantly active man. Take all but fell over to get a better view of the figure.

The face was young, a boy just reaching mid puberty, 14 at most. It also banged all kinds of warning bells in my head. I knew that face. Not well enough to identify, but I had seen it at least once.

By instinct I glanced to his hands. Cut off gloves revealed slim fingers bared in the preferred way of some ninja, with nails that were very neat, very short and very clean. And then something clicked

Brat!

That little brown messenger that delivered Misao's letter. He was cleaner, and apparently meaner but that face would not be mistaken for anyone else. Or those nails. But somehow...it didn't seem to click. Misao was no longer a technical part of the Oniwabanshu, why would she one of their ninja, an infiltrator no less, to send her message?

"I know this kid. He said his name was 'Brat'. He came by yesterday. I thought he was one of your messengers Misao. " When in doubt, ask.

Misao was beginning to look like she could have swallowed a fish, whole. "You've seen him before?" and after a microsecond and at an ear splitting pitch she continued, "You think he is my MESSENGER?!"

I nodded. Aoshi had the first glimmers of worry in his face, and that was making me very nervous.

"Kaoru," Misao continued, at a forced calm pace, "I sent my letter to you via pigeon."

Somewhere in Japan, a plate shattered and all of us heard it.

"Explain."

That was Enishi, not me. Though it should have been.

Misao looked away, gathering her thoughts with a frown. "I sent in my pigeon from the port a week ago. " And then she seemed to click things together and then turned and looked nearly accusingly at me. "That's why you had your bokken with you last night. You didn't know I was coming!"

I shook my head. "Actually, I did. Your letter ....it said 'tonight', I remember freaking out at that part. It was very specific about the time. Did you plan that far ahead?"

Misao hissed under her breath. "They forged it, the bastards! They took my letter and gave you an edited forged version."

"Irrelevant." Enishi cut in. I wanted to protest, but the look of absolute thunder in his face stopped me. His eyes were a burning midnight blue. "They had the letter for a week. What were its contents? How much of information has been compromised, and who is that to you Shinimori." Enishi glanced at the prone form of Brat and looked back at Aoshi. I wondered if I could slowly edge away from his sudden shift in personality.

Misao looked like she was about to vomit. Lee made as though to cup her elbow, in the way some men did for the elderly. She waved him way. "They know about you Enishi, not by name but the hints were obvious enough. Nothing else."

Suddenly Enishi flashed a feral grin, his dark eyes shining suspiciously. "That explains why they haven't done anything else."

They haven't attacked because of Enishi? That made no sense. He was a wanted man after all. But before I could ask, Enishi moved his gaze to Aoshi and jerked his head in the direction of the body. "Who's the kid? You seem to know him."

Aoshi looked troubled for a bit. "He is one of our youths in training in one of our splinter groups based in Tokyo. They are mostly dismantled now, but we have a few in function for intelligence gathering. "

If Enishi was any less of cultured man, he would have snorted. "So, you've lost control of your external factions?"

Aoshi blinked. "No. They are just responding to orders from central command."

"I thought you were central command."

Something in Aoshi's features darkened, becoming sharper. "Tamaki has communications. They follow his orders under my name."

"When?" Misao shot up, if possible looking sicker.

"Three days ago."

"Shit."

I bit my lip. Aoshi's men were sleeper agents. They didn't have a home base so to speak, and they were only ever contacted through some sort of secretive message system. There was not actual way to find them outside of it. It was a way of keeping them safe should central command fall.

Their protection was now working against them.

"Wouldn't they know that it's you here?" I asked.

Aoshi shook his head. "Cloning features is a basic infiltration technique. Looks mean nothing. They will not take time to ask questions."

Misao's hand flicked down to her many sheathed daggers. "But why haven't they attacked yet? Everything is here. You know how many of them are out there. They are holding back for something."

Enishi snorted. " I told you, they are holding back for me."

Aoshi arched a brow in question.

The smirk hanging off the edge of Enishi's lips was as dark as his eyes. "Your Tamaki, he is a government official?"

Misao nodded, also looking wary.

That dark smirk just went up several notches and began to flash some very white, pointy teeth. "He will never get approval for an all out offensive so long as I am in the area. The government needs me too much."

"What?" More than one voice went into the question.

"Misao," Enishi's voice was authoritative but with a slight hint of teasing. He was having fun with this. "What are the main exports of my company?"

The question snapped her out of her lost air, and she seemed to read off an internal list she had memorised for years. "Silk, wheat, cannabis, opium, gold, spice, iron, gu-" Her eyes widened as some great lightning bolt struck her.

"Guns. You supply guns to the government!"

He smirked. "Exactly. And I'm the only one they've got that's even willing to consider trading with them. The underground is not fond of the Government, and ordering it in from the west takes too long and costs too much."

Aoshi frowned. He didn't like guns of any kind, I knew that, so it was only morbidly ironic that it was guns that were saving his life again. "This protection won't last long. He is unstable and will go against direct orders if he thinks the ends justify it."

Enishi's dark blue eyes flashed unpleasantly and suddenly I had a very bad feeling in the pit of my gut.

"I'm counting on it."

Half an hour later I was in my room kneeling in a half meditative half contemplative state of mind. I was tranquil. I was clam. I was anything but strong. No. Right then there was no strength in this humble body. Because if there was strength here, I would grab Enishi by the hair and bash his head repeatedly against a sharp rock until the inner bits came out and my hands were bloo-

Nope, no strength at all.

It was a stupid plot. A plot worthy of the combined efforts of Yahiko, Kenji and Sano. If the enemy has the advantage of numbers, then do something supremely stupid like instigate a God damn attack in an arena they weren't prepared for, so that they are at the very least, somewhat disorganized. The blond man had the balls to suggest it with a straight face.

Oniwabashu ninja's 'somewhat' disorganized would be like having a katana that was somewhat bloodstained. These were men under Aoshi. Their 'disorganized' could still topple the government with one hand behind their back. As it was he had to personally take Brat away to do, what I could only assume was some form of brain washing. I had no doubt he would succeed.

But apparently, between two ninjas, a demented bodyguard and a psychopath, no one else saw it that way. So at sunset, to get the collective panties of our avid spies in a twist, we were going to make a little trek down by the docks. Where there would be a ship waiting for us.

Take, taking the time to show off nominal knowledge, informed that all ships at said port had their sails damaged. The waiting list for new ones were a month long, at least.

Then the words 'Government Registered Ship' made all that disappear. After all, Mr Tamaki was a government man, why ever would he want to damage a government ship? They were the good guys.

Moron.

So there I was, three hours from sunset, kneeling in my bedroom and waiting for some company. Of both the earthly and unearthly sort. The ripple of shadow from a wall of my room started a second before the tiny rap against the bamboo.

"Come in Aoshi."

By the time the dark haired man walked in, the whole deathly family were in the room and looking polite and presentable.

"Good evening Himura-san."

Kenshin bowed.

I smiled. Aoshi made it a life-long goal of keeping people at a distance by using last names. But he was also tricky. There were apparently two Himura's in the room at the moment, so it was perfectly acceptable to greet both at once, if only one could be seen.

He was most skilled in the art of not acting insane while dealing with ghosts. Perhaps I should ask for some pointers.

"Which Himura, Aoshi? We appear to be a little crowded at the moment."

He smiled. It was both beautiful and wistful. Revealing crow's feet wrinkles around the eyes and a smile that should not have been kept hidden for that long. Relief was a good look for him.

" I apologise. A greeting to both Himura Kenshin and Himura Kaoru." He paused for a moment frowning for a second and then I felt a slight peak of Ki in the room. "And to the three other spectres who are beyond my sight. Yahiko, Sano and Megumi-san?" He looked towards me for conformation.

Beyond his sight? Strange. "Yes. Was it a group for you too?" If left alone, the man could go on with the niceties for hours. I figure cutting to the chase would be better.

He nodded as he came down to a formal kneel before me. "My four subordinates and Himura-san. Have you gleaned their purpose?"

Damn, these Death guys travelled in packs. "Yes, in a way. But I was informed that they were not my....punishment. Whatever that means." I eyed Yahiko as I said this. He grinned and gave me a thumbs up but remained silent.

Aoshi let out a half-sigh. "You are lucky they are not so. Torment from an unchangeable death is most terrible."

Shit. He was going into zen-backwards-monk mode. "Unchangeable death?"

"They came for my sin, the blood on my hand and the betrayal on my conscience. It was my punishment to watch them fade without influence, taking those I cared for with them. Himura is the last. If it is not so for you," he looked up, his dark eyes glimmering strangely, "than perhaps there is hope yet for us."

Fade without influence..."You mean I could influence who they took?" I looked amongst them. Familiar faces on an unfamiliar presence. "I could influence you idiots, and you didn't tell me?"

Not all that comes to you is meant to be punishment Kaoru-dono. Fortune comes in strange forms. Kenshin's words from earlier today echoed loudly in my ears.

Sano shrugged, "You had to figure it out without our help. Cosmic rules and all that shit. Frosty there was a lucky break for you."

"Yeah Busu." Yahiko sneered. "Getting a bit slow in the head in your old age arn't you?"

Aoshi squinted, as though he was listening to a far away echo. He shook his head and took a deep breath. "Himura-san, have you seen their true faces?"

I bit my lip. My eye caught sight of Megumi who looked coy and sneaky as ever, right before she flashed her eyes to their unnatural deep maroon and then back to their normal human lie again.

I immediately looked away and Megumi let loose a string of foxy hoots.

"Yes. But just only this morning. I still am not sure of what exactly they are. What do you know of them?"

Aoshi nodded. "You are taking it well. I was... not so tranquil after."

I know people who would pay big money just to see Aoshi un-tranquil.

"Himura-san, the entities, they are each different because they carry different duties. Death takes many forms in many skins. Violence, illness, misfortune, old age and young death are given different bodies."

As he said it, my mind pieced together the titles with the faces. Battousai was violent by nature and now by title as well, Megumi pale and thin was illness, Yahiko small and childlike was young, and Sano hazy and indistinct could only be misfortune.

Shit. Megumi at least wouldn't be an immediate threat, and I couldn't for the life of me figure Yahiko out. But Sano and Kenshin were eerily probable. With what was happening tonight, I feared that both of them would be called on.

"I would ask of you, Himura-san, a favour." He continued.

I nodded, my voice still stuck in my throat, choked silent by information.

" My previous spectres faded with the deaths of what was left of the core Oniwabanshu group. The only spectre left to me is Himura. And all I have left of my family is Misao. Her death, is one thing I cannot have."

Yahiko.

It all suddenly made sense. The Death of youth. An unborn infant is by definition youth. My hand found itself at my mouth, to hold back a gasp perhaps, or even to muffle out what was already loud in my ears.

Misao was going to die.

"Kaoru, please. If you can, however you can, make sure she survives. Their vendetta is with me, but she is what they need. I fear I might not be enough for her this time."

What do you say to that? I didn't know then, heck I still don't know. Whatever I said left Aoshi looking relived as he bowed once more before sliding my shoji door shut. Leaving me alone in a room full of Death.

Great, really.

"That went well." Kenshin cautiously offered.

I glared at him.

"You were talking to frost man, ya know. You're lucky you didn't freeze or some such around him. The man is cold."Sano, chewing on his fishbone dropped his two sen in as well.

Megumi smacked him in the back of the head. "Don't talk with your mouth full. And were you even listening to the same conversation? Shinimori-san just said that he was willing to do anything to protect Misao. That is the purest form of love out there; Not that a rooster brain like you would understand compassion if it bit you in the ass."

Sano flinched and covered his head with a broad palm. "Ouch man, stop it ok. I'm just saying there comes a time when a person must decide the value of a life. Either you love it enough or you don't. You can wrap it up however you want, frosty there didn't love her enough to be with her. He couldn't get over himself long enough to love her. I don't think he could love anything other than his principals. And they make cold bed partners."

Yahiko snorted. "As though you would know rooster-head, you don't have any principals!"

"Shut up ok! I'm just sayin' some things are bigger in life than just what you believe in. He made his choice, and if I think he's a cold man for it, what is it to you?"

"Shut up. All of you." I cut in before things could get truly out of hand. This conversation seemed as random as anything else. "What is going to happen tonight, and how do I stop it. That's all I care about right now."

Yahiko shrugged, in a way that always drove me nuts. "Can't say. You'll figure it out when it's gonna' happen. We can't be too helpful ya' know. Rules and such."

"Who the hell makes these rules anyway?!"

Sano blinked very deliberately. "You don't wanna' know jou-chan."

"Either way," Megumi snapped. "The evening will be here soon. You might not see us in this form for some time. We need to perform our duties."

A herd of someone's somewhere must have been walking on my grave because the shivers that climbed up my spine were choice.

"Who are you here for? Tell me that at least, if not when."

"Kaoru-dono," Kenshin was being soothing. Bad things were going to be said if Kenshin started off by soothing me. "we are not here for a single person. We are here for four very different deaths. It makes no difference as to who it happens to, just so long as it happens. "

I frowned. It wasn't making much sense. "Isn't that the same-" It hit me then.

They weren't assigned to people, they were assigned to events. Four deaths had to happen in whatever remained of my life. The only thing that could possibly change in that, was who it happened to.

This whole thing was ultimately pointless. Someone should have stabbed me in the beginning of this mess and gotten it over with. I was to be a witness to four deaths no matter what I did.

They lied. This was punishment.

"This unworthy one is sorry Kaoru-dono. But it is time for us to go. But remember what was said of the worth of life Kaoru-dono. Don't regret it." He flickered once from violet to golden eyes and then slowly all of them faded back to faceless formless shadows.

The sharp rap against my door a second after was expected.

The look on Misao's face told me that it was time for the first part of Enishi's plan to come through without her even saying a word. I was already in my hakama and gi with bokken in hand. Just about as ready as I could get.

The silence between us only lasted as long as it took me to shut the shoji door behind me as we walked towards the front gate where, no doubt the whole group would be waiting.

"I just saw Aoshi leave."

I nodded. In my head I went through the many, many ways a human body could be ripped to shreds by the hands of the insane and the broken body in my mind was always Misao's.

"What did you talk about?" She wasn't even looking at me. It was both uncomfortable and a relief at once. I don't think I could handle lying to her with eye contact.

"He wanted to talk about Kenshin." In a way, it was true. Kenshin, and whatever was wearing his face now.

Misao let off a half smirk."Yes. About Kenshin, but also about me. I am a spy Kaoru, I'm not stupid. What did he say?"

I bit my lip and wondered just how to word the gist of our conversation without making both Aoshi and me sound either crazy or condescending. "He...asked me to watch your back, when he could not."

She snorted and shook her head. "Thought as much. He still doesn't think I can take care of myself. I'm sorry to say this Kaoru, but between the both of us, I'm actually the one more prepared to deal with a no holds barred battle. I fight dirty and I'm unapologetic about it because it works. He can't see me that way though. That's how I knew he could never love me as I love him."

That wasn't true. I wanted to tell her so. But how could I say that she had the hand of death on her and Aoshi was terrified that she would die before him. I couldn't. But she had also said love. Not loved, love. "You still love him."

She suddenly had a distant look on her face. "I always will. But I know now, more than anyone else exactly why I cannot be with him. He does not feel for me as I do not feel for Lee. There is nothing Lee can do to change what I don't feel, as there was nothing I could do to change Aoshi. The irony is something only a sadistic God could throw my way. A great love is beyond my grasp."

"Misao...." What should I say? She sounded so...resigned. It was almost like she was waiting for death to come grab her. "Not all love must be great, or even fully mutual. Great love can grow from tenderness. Do not discount Lee. You may not love him greatly yet. But you still can. The kind of dramatic love you're looking for is as rare as the stories of them are numerous."

"But you and Kenshin..."

I smiled sadly. Yes. What we had would look like a dramatic storybook romance from the outside. "Before Kenshin married me he talked to me about Tomoe-san. A human heart can have many kinds of love Misao. Part of his heart, a part I could never touch would always be hers. She was his burning romantic heart killed off too soon. Our love was built on his tenderness towards me. It wasn't a great dramatic shift in emotion. It was choice. He chose to love me. Which in its own way made our love richer."

Misao's eyes widened.

"Would it be impossible for you to give to Lee what Aoshi didn't give you?"

Misao looked away, slightly pale. "I don't know."

Everyone was already gathered there and waiting. And when I said everyone, I meant everyone, ghostly forms included.

Take was nearest to me and looked terribly twitchy, but as I came to a stop beside him I also sensed a calm sort of acceptance.

"You don't have to be here Take, you don't have to fight. Go home. Protect Manami-chan. Yahiko would understand, whatever the hell you promised him."

He smiled, it was a half smile that reminded me achingly of Kenshin's when I was trying to convince him not stop being overly noble. "This isn't about a promise Sensei. This isn't about any stupid old promise. I am your best student. It's only fair that I watch your back, no?"

And then he had to destroy the image by giving a thumbs' up sign and shooting off a wink. "After all, it gives me something to brag about to the brats when classes start again. I think some of them are beginning to get a little bit too big for their bokkens. I need to chop them back to size."

I laughed hard. He was still so much that idiot that I moulded from youth. But he was also becoming a wonderful young man. If I had to wipe away a few tears because of that. So be it. "Stupid boy."

He gave that soft smile again. "Always will be sensei."

I gave him a little pat on the shoulder and continued forward.

Misao stopped off to the side slightly, and behind her, nearer than he had been in some time, was Lee for once without his trench coat. He looked about as armed as Misao in the small, metal and pointy department. I ignored the pale sickly form of Megumi hovering around the pair, hovering around like an ill boding crow with a curled up and furry Yahiko at her heels.

Aoshi was also free of his coat apposite the pair. His kodachi at his side like well trained dogs. He gave a half nod to me, which I returned. Battousai stared at me unblinking and fanged from the fringes of Aoshi's shadow.

And waiting like a ghost himself at my gates was Enishi. The sun just setting behind him set his hair on fire in watery yellow and gold. He looked like some strange sort of winter sun god; Tall, pale and strikingly beautiful on fire.

Behind him an exquisitely dark carriage waited for him with doors wide open.

His eyes were turquoise but there were flecks of dark blue waiting to be called out at any moment. Beside him, close enough to touch, lurked Sano. Hazy but as menacing as ever in his air of absolute misfortune, Sano. It stabbed my heart.

Enishi too could die this evening. This weird kidnapper-criminal-student-man made my life a wave of confusion and a different sort of hell. But he also brought me to life again. He gave me something to fight for.

I didn't love him. But...I could.

Perhaps it was time to take my own advice.

I stopped right before him. Barely half an arm's reach away.

He looked down at me from his ridiculous height. "You must leave as soon as I'm gone. The spies will get to him in fifteen minutes at least and it will take them as long to get into action. You need to be on the ship by then. As soon as they are sure that I'm not in the area, they will attack. There is no time for any mistakes. Do you hear me?"

Yes I did. And what I heard was "Don't die don't die don't die don't you dare die!"

"Ok. But you have to listen too." I grabbed a handful of his shirt just under his throat and tugged downward.

He arched a brow but bent to the pull without comment. Coming close to my face so we met eye to eye for what felt like the first time. He had beautiful eyes, especially up close.

"Don't you dare die on me, you hear? I refuse to accept it. I put too much work into beating sense into that thick head of yours to have it end unfinished. Be careful or I will beat you down myself!"

He smirked, his beautiful eyes softening in such a way that they seemed a light sky blue. "Hai, sense-"

I kissed him.

My lips pushing against the slightly parted seam of his with enough force to hurt. He tasted the same way he smelled, rich spicy and deep. My mind went to some other place where thinking didn't exist. He burned to the touch so much so that I thought my lips should have been steaming.

One second I was on the ground, the next I was in his arms with my feet on the tip of my toes with most of my weight pressed against his body with both of his arms braced around my back and my arms around his neck.

He kissed back like he expected no resistance. Lips, tongue teeth hunted for mine. He tasted me with his tongue like he never wanted to forget my flavour and wanted me to carry his taste forever. He pressed hard against my lips as thought he would never part again. And his teeth nipped as though he wanted my mouth to never forget his presence. He kissed as though he wanted to brand my body though his mouth so that for as long as I lived this would be how I always remembered him.

Hot, demanding and someone I wanted with every fibre of my being.

He pulled away as fast as he attacked me, but he didn't release me. Hot spicy breaths brushed against my brutalised lips as his stomach flexed with every breath against my hips in a way that set me tingling to the tips of my arched toes.

I was panting too, my chest brushing against his in a way that gave all sorts of wonderful mental images to me.

"That is an excellent reason to be careful sensei. Can I be promised such a reward if I return unharmed?" Sneaky, sneaky man. My hormones were telling me, the guy deserved to be molested half to death for simply breathing the same air as me, anything else was just that much of a bonus.

"You get anything you bloody want if you come back in one piece." A dangerous promise to give a man like Enishi. But I meant every word of it.

If we survived this, and he still wanted me, he could have me.

He grinned then, his eyes dark as midnight and flashing in an extremely flattering way. "Then you better keep yourself unharmed as well Kaoru. I will have my reward. And I will have it in full."

Lighting shot down my spine fusing both my brain and breath. The tingling was back tenfold. "W-whatever you say Enishi."

"Yes," He growled. Baring teeth as he restrained himself from taking his reward right here against the gate. God knows I could feel how badly he wanted me. Pressed up this close, I had no doubt, that if we all survived this disaster, I would be one satisfied woman.

Slowly, reluctantly Enishi slid me down his body. Causing all kinds of shivers down my back as every ridge of his body pressed hard against every curve of mine. My feet were on the ground but my head was still in space.

With aching gentles, Enishi cupped my face, bringing me back to reality. "Don't die Kaoru."

I smiled at him, burning with want need and a deep tenderness for a man who wanted me beyond all reason. "Don't die Enishi."

My body shivered slightly as I watched the carriage disappear from sight around the corner.

"We should go now." Aoshi voiced from a polite distance behind me. I didn't know if he disapproved of what he saw, and frankly, I didn't care.

"Alright." I patted my bokken at my side gently. "If you're ready, let's head off. We don't have time to spare." And I began walking to the docks. We had to walk there because we had to make sure as many people saw use leaving and heading towards there as possible.

But we didn't have to be slow about it.

"Yo, Sensei." Take jogged up beside me and kept up with my brisk pace. I noticed that Take and Misao flanked me on either side. Aoshi held back as rear guard. A full battle formation.

"Sensei, you should have told me that you were serious about the whole training thing being foreplay! I'll never think of the dojo the same way after seeing that! You guys didn't do anything in there did you?? EWWWW I don't want to know! Don't tell me!"

I smiled. Some things, even in the face of battle, never changed.

"Well Take-kun...we didn't use the dojo....much."

Take's groan was a thing of beauty.