Disclaimer: I own nothing….*sigh*

"Will, that's crazy," commented Mary. "What would we say? What would we do? We don't even know who this Philip Pullman is or where he lives."

"Mary's right. There are too many things that could go wrong, too many variables. And like I said before, it doesn't matter. We have to plan for the future, not go and try to satisfy our curiosity," whispered Kirjava, unease coming off her like fog off a bay.

But Will knew that she knew that was not true. It did matter. She just said that because she was frightened of what would happen, frightened of the unknown. But finding the truth was the only way he, and possibly Mary, could move ahead. Otherwise that question would follow them all their life like a guilty deed, eating away at their minds making it impossible to be anything remotely close to happy. It would always be there, reminding them of their curiosity that they refused to satisfy. Will didn't want that. It was already hard enough to not think of Lyra without that question attached to her name.

Will looked down at his daemon and she returned his gaze, her big cat eyes filled with uncertainty. The rolls were suddenly switched for it was now Will that was trying to calm his daemon by petting her softly, instead of the other way around. For some reason he felt strangely confident about the whole thing, that if they found the answer to that question, everything was going to be alright. Kirjava purred nervously in response, as Lena spoke up.

"Like you said Will that is what Lyra would've done. Or at least what I think she would do. I don't pretend to know her, and I know I never will, but I have a feeling that she would go up to Philip Pullman and find the answer to that question. But then again, like I said, I don't know her. So I'm not sure if that's correct or not…" She started with a confident voice that declined and ended in a quiet murmur.

She was trying but it seemed that the more she thought about it, the more it seemed less viable and important. She was doubting herself, because she was right, thought Will. She didn't know Lyra and didn't know what Lyra would've done if she was here. But Lena was still trying, trying to stand up for Will by agreeing with him, and it warmed Will's heart. He looked back up at his girlfriend and spoke his reply.

"No, you're right, Lena. Lyra would've done or at least proposed this way before now. And…and…" His voice was cracking. He hadn't spoken about Lyra to anyone besides Mary, and even though it had been a while since he cried about her, that still didn't stop the wave of emotions that were now washing through him. He took a deep breath, feeling Kirjava's and Mary's worried eyes on him, and continued. "And I think that we should do it. We should go up to Philip Pullman and find the answer to the question that I know we all have been wondering about."

There was silence that followed Will's words, silence that seemed to be filled with all the words in the world, with all the emotions, with all the unrest without a sound. During that silence Mary paced the floor, her footsteps echoing through the white and fairly barren kitchen. Lena fiddled with her fingers, unsure as to what to do next. Kirjava continued to purr nervously, and Will absentmindedly petted her, wondering what was going to be said in response to his words. He didn't have to wait long, for shortly after, someone finally spoke.

"You're right. As much as I hate to emit it, you're right Will. We need to answer that question, if we ever want peace….but how?" said Mary, stopping her pacing on the last words and looking up at Will.

"We could look up the Philip Pullman's bio on the internet. We might have to a little digging, but I bet we can find his address. The books came out last month, so there hasn't been enough time for them to get that popular, so there would be no reason for Philip Pullman to hide information because of fans and reporters," commented Lena.

"But what would we say? I mean we can't just go up to his door and ask how he knew the truth, could we?" questioned Mary, turning to Lena.

"We could come up with some cover story," replied Lena.

"And what would that be?"

"Reporters," Will suddenly blurt out.

He had no idea where that answer had come from, but the more Will thought about it, the more it seemed to make perfect sense.

"'Reporters'?" repeated Mary, turning back to Will.

"We could pose as reporters. Yah, that way we can ask all the questions we want, without it seeming suspicious or creepy. Of course we'd have to refrain from letting it slip that his books contain the truth, but that'll be easy," said Will, mood brightening with excitement of the plausibility of his plan.

"That's brilliant, Will! That could totally work," commented Mary, a slight grin on her face.

Will beamed. Lena smiled. But Kirjava was still uneasy.

"But how are we going to do that? He'll ask for an ID, which we don't have…and…and…other things could go wrong too," stammered Kirjava, trying to find a believable reason for not going along with Will's plan.

It wasn't the fact that she didn't want to find the answer to the question that plagued them both, noted Will. It was the fact that she was just uncomfortable with the whole situation, worried about what could happen, and possibly even a little weary of finding out the answer. In a way Will knew that she reflected what part of him really thought about the whole plan, but he still wanted to go along with it. To him, finding the answer was worth all the risk.

"Oh, that'll be easy. I've gotten by worse without a real ID before," replied Mary.

In the corner of Will's eye, he could see Lena's expression of confusion at Mary's seemingly sudden remark. But then after awhile, just like all the times before, she realized that Kirjava had just spoken and Mary was responding to what she said, and the confusion was wiped off.

"Oh! Just like you did to get to the window on Sunderland Avenue. You made a fake an ID with your colleague's…I think it was something Payne's old library card," spoke Lena.

You could tell on her face, that the moment those words came out of her mouth, Lena knew she had made a mistake. Mary, who was still facing Will, tensed up at Lena's comment. Those were details that even Will didn't know about, until he read the books. But having Will know was one thing, but his girlfriend? Will could tell that those thoughts and more were running through Mary's head by the sense of tension in the air. Even Will, who told Lena the truth, was still a little uneasy about her knowing the little details of his thought and actions that were written in the books. But Mary, who was at first against telling anyone the truth, was obviously a lot more on edge about the whole situation. The thoughts written in the books were more than private, more than similar to a diary entry. They were something that no one else heard if you didn't tell them, something that was supposed to be shared with people close to you, people that you knew and trusted. Will had a feeling that he possibly would've told Lena about them in the future, but he also had a feeling that Mary would've never done that. He could tell that what Lena had just said, was something that was a little, if not a lot, disturbing and awkward to Mary.

"Oh, Mary…I-I'm so sorry…I-I didn't know what I was thinking…I-I-I-" stuttered Lena, trying to find the right words to decrease the tension.

"Lena, please," began Will, cutting her off and holding up his hand to say stop. "You'll only make it worse."

She nodded in response and looked down at the floor, her cheeks like bright cherries. All that time Mary had said nothing. She was just standing there frozen with her muscles tense as a diversity of emotions ran across her face.

"Mary?" said Will, worry seeping into his voice.

"I'm fine Will. It's-It's just….," began Mary, reaching up and rubbing the heels of her hands into her eyes as if to wipe way the unease. "It's those damn books. Those damn impossible books. If only…Oh God…" Mary ran her hands through her hair, and looked back up at Will. "Again it that question turns up. That stupid question of how he could've known."

"All the more reason to find the answer to that question," stated Will.

It was hard to see Mary, so tired and stressed. The only time he had once before seen her like this, was when they had first came back. They were sorting out all the legal problems, and in the middle of that process, there was a period when the future looked bleak. Mary looked like she did now, only now it was slightly worse. Now there was more than stress and fatigue plaguing her, there were the emotions that only a few hours ago Will was going through. Will knew had to say something.

"Things will work out. That always seems to happen for us," began Will, placing his hand on Mary's shoulder. "We just need to get through them. Like we always do. And finding the answer to that question will help. I just know it will."

Mary turned to Will and gazed at him with her tired eyes. Will gave a comforting smile in return.

"You're right Will. We just have to move on," Mary said with a sigh. "My, how the rolls have been switched…"

Will smirked and gave a small laugh in response, as he took his hand off of Mary's shoulder. "Yah, I guess you're right."

Mary smiled, eyes twinkling, and went off to remake the tea.

"So…" started Lena, walking up to Will's side.

Taking his eyes of Mary, Will turned towards his girlfriend, still smiling.

"No harm done?" questioned Lena, a slight worried tone in her voice.

Will shook his head no. Lena will be caring to the end, thought Will. Not that he minded that. "I guess we should start looking up stuff about this Philip Pullman, eh?"