Hiyah! I'm in a good mood today, so I'm not going to hack a certain anonymous user's computer and plant the world's evilest (is that a word?) bug...

Don't swear at me, it's rude. And that statement was also very perverted, I'll just point that out. No, mister (or miss) anonymous user, you WILL NOT have sex with me. You don't even know where I live. For all you know, I could live in Kenya, or the Yucatan, or, well, you get the idea...

Percabeth won. Don't get mad at me because of it, you're the ones who chose that pairing, not me. It was completely unbiased. Yes, I'd prefer Percabeth. No, I did not falsify the results. Percabeth won. Heck, if you want me to write a story later that has a Percy/Siofra relationship, I will. It'll probably be a one-shot, or a short story, and will not be "in canon", but I will write one if you want. Heck, you can write one! Well, as long as you explain Siofra in the A/N...

Another thing my father just realized: I have pierced ears! Amazing. Absolutely amazing.

DISCLAIMER: Shirt of Ultimate Disambiguation. Figure it out yourselves (Whoever reviews and guesses what my shirt says will be mentioned on here for their brilliance next chapter...).

2004 A.D.

Manhattan, New York

Siofra's POV

"Percy! Siofra!" said Sally, hugging us each in turn. "You've grown since Christmas!"

Total lie. Well, actually, Percy has grown. I haven't. There's a reason why my name is Gaelic. That reason is that the Greek word for elf is ageriko, and doesn't make for much of a name.

Elves are basically nymphs, they're just shorter, aren't trees, and have pointy ears.

Basically, imagine Tolkien's elves. He was a son of Athena, and wrote about them a lot. Obviously, he couldn't talk about the gods, so he created Middle Earth and all that. Okay, I absolutely suck at explanations. Anyways, I haven't grown since I was, like, five. I'm shorter than average, even for a elf, being three feet, five inches tall. That makes me exactly two feet shorter than Percy.

Sally asked us about school, and didn't even bring up that we had gotten expelled. She said something about Percy's letters, and I started laughing hysterically. "Letters?" I managed to ask in between wheezes. "You wrote letters? Dyslexic, and you send letters?"

Percy's POV

Siofra was still laughing, and to support herself, she touched my shoulder. Now remember, this is the walking electric chair we're talking about here. My hair stood on end, and smelled like it was on fire. "Siofra!" I whined. "Not cool!"

"Sorry..." she said. "But it's funny!" She was still laughing, and now even Sally was smiling.

"Oh, crap! I need a freakin' inhaler!" She was searching through her backpack for it. "Ah-hah!" she yelled triumphantly, before using the thing about twenty times.

We talked for a while about classes and stuff. I didn't mention the museum incident, and Siofra, now that she could breathe, was staring daggers at me because of it. I didn't want to worry Sally.

"Sally! Bean dip!" yelled Gabe.

I gritted my teeth, fervently hoping that the moon stayed where it was supposed to be. I had accidentally caused enough tsunamis in my life. Siofra tensed her hands, and electric sparks jumped from her fingers.

"Can we just kill him?" she asked.

Sally ignored the question. "We're going to Montauk. Three days, same cabin, no Gabe." We hadn't been able to go there for two years. Gabe always said we didn't have enough money.

"So we can't kill him?" Siofra looked genuinely disappointed. She scares me sometimes.

"When?" I questioned.

"As soon as we get ready," she smiled.

Gabe stood in the doorway. "Sally? Did you hear me? Bean dip."

Sally smiled at him. Crap, she should be an actress. I could never pull that off. "Of course, Gabe. I'm on my way, I was just tell the kids about the trip."

"The trip? You mean you were serious about that?"

He is so not going to let us go, I thought, but Sally bribed him with food.

A/N: Okay, so can you tell that I'm obsessed with AF and LotR? You can't say I didn't warn you... And, obviously, I made up the whole Tolkien being a son of Athena thing. Actually, he was an avid Christian, and great friends with C.S. Lewis. Jack wrote ST after a conversation with J.R.R. They had decided that one would write a time travel story, and the other would write a space travel story. J.R.R.'s TT story remained unfinished after his death, but is currently published in a book of his short stories.

The whole 'elf' thing doesn't have much of an impact on the story, I just decided to put it in. Gods don't have to be humans... Pan is a satyr, and Eros is a cupid.

Sue me if I wanted to do something a little different with her, plus it was a great way to say how tall Percy was.

- Amariah, wishful adopter of Schrodinger's cat