I - Lost

Kylo's gargantuan figure covered the entire doorframe. It had been years since he had entered his father's old ship, yet everything seemed just as familiar. He studied the rusty walls and the exposed wireframe. Exactly the same as it had been when he had been a child. Rey eyed him curiously, as he explored the ship with his hands.

"You can't teach an old dog," Kylo said, as he forced a twisted panel on a sidewall, "new tricks." The panel clicked, and a secret compartment opened. Within it was a number of old Jedi dolls. He offered a couple of them to Rey, and they regarded the figurines' features in silence. He had shared these models with Ella, several lifetimes ago… "There must be so many hidden treasures in this old piece of junk." he remarked. He was quickly lost in thought, as the flood of memories and emotions took over.

Rey kept her eyes fixed on the small dolls, finding it harder and harder to look at his new face. The tiny, funny men held their colorful lightsabers proudly in their hands. "It looks like you took the Jedi culture to heart," she said without thinking.

"You have no idea." he replied darkly. He put the dolls in his hands back into the compartment, before beckoning for her to return the ones she held. Once the panel slid closed, an awkward silence invaded the room. It suddenly occurred to her that this was the first time they were alone together since they had defeated Snoke and his guards. So much had changed since then.

"So." Kylo said.

"So…" Rey echoed, every nerve on its edge.

"You have summoned me."

"I have."

"To what purpose have you brought me to the middle of nowhere?" The yellow, cyborg eye never shifted, as if it were tied to her by an invisible chain.

Rey remained unphased. "To settle unfinished business." she declared.

"I see," Kylo said as he ran his mechanical hand over the Falcon's controls. "There seems to be a lot of that between the two of us lately. I'll leave the terms up to you." he said.

Rey felt the urge of curiosity, "I'll let you know a truth, and you let me in on one." she said simply.

He eyed her hungrily, "I know more about you than I let on." His truth taunted, completely breaking her line of thought.

Though his statement had made her stumble, she was far too ready to fall. And she knew exactly what she needed to address first. "I knew the bomb would hit you before I fired." she confessed, full of conflict.

She always managed to throw his eyes off balance. "You'll hate me after all of this." he said simply, watching her reaction carefully.

Rey smiled. "I could never hate you." she said, as she stepped even nearer.

Ben eyed her closely, "You don't know how wrong you are." There was a tinge of hopelessness in his voice this time. Rey was afraid of this small reaction because she knew how much it meant in him. He sounded so certain, it made her insecure. She wanted to search his eyes for answers but found that the remaining charcoal eye was once again void of emotion. The digital eye simply could not reflect it.

Suddenly there was sadness inside her. "I'm sorry." she whispered.

He studied her face; it was inches away. "What for?" he asked earnestly.

Her eyes wandered over the parts of his body where skin had been replaced by metal. Her hand reached involuntarily to the exposed mechanical skull. Ben closed his eyes. Though that part of his face would never feel again, the soft touch of her hand reached him through the Force, and he was comforted. "I did this, Ben. I am so, so, so sorry." She felt a sharp ache beginning to rise from her stomach up to her chest. The dam behind her eyes threatened to break, but she was too stubborn to allow herself to feel self-pity and cry. Again.

Ben's eyes opened and found hers. His mecha-hand reached up and lay softly on Rey's. His free hand found a small, tightened fist, and coerced it to unwind. He took the open palm and placed it gently on his warm, right cheek, where her lightsaber had forever left its mark. "You did this." Ben said, not letting their gazes part. "You saved me, Rey. I am alive because of you. Never forget that." He let her cradle his face as he pressed his forehead against hers, for real this time. They breathed together for a moment, trying to catch up with the present.

He released her hands and they fell limply to her sides. He stepped even closer. His gloved hands ran up and down her trembling arms, trying to bring her tranquility while bringing memories of the time he had done the same while being lightyears away. "I made that shot." she gasped.

"And I chose to fly to meet the blast, that wasn't on you. What was your responsibility is how fast you reacted to save me. We are meeting here because of you. I have never blamed you for any of it." Ben said slowly, openly enjoying the warmth that was growing between them. "It's your turn."

Rey's heart raced dangerously, yet she couldn't keep her hands from reaching out to feel his strong chest. The rhythm of his heart was perfectly even. Her sparrow eyes lit with determination. "I didn't ask you to come meet me halfway across the galaxy so we could destroy one another." She yearned for a reaction.

But, as always, there was no light in his tired eye. "I know how this night goes." His hands slid off of her strong arms, as hers also pulled away from his body. "I think you do too." Suddenly, his voice was full of fire, and Rey was caught in the blaze. His fingers were still intertwined with hers, reluctant to let go of the feeling of her skin. But they wanted more.

They never knew who started first, but one by one, their clothes fell uselessly to the floor. Ben watched as Rey's skin met the open air, breathless at the sight of her. His hair was in a disarray, desperate to be free of any convention. He was clumsy and unbalanced but never lost his focus. And there she was: bronzed and strong and beautiful. Most of all, she looked fearless. He reached out to her, unafraid of breaking off, certain that they would find each other at the end of this encounter.

His rough hand met the softest skin. Her scent was everywhere. She trembled as he came closer, hoping to feel as much of her as possible. They had both dreamed of this together. They had shared a kiss across the universe. But they had never had the joy of intimacy. Of being alone in a small space where nothing else existed. This kiss was different. There was nothing standing between them anymore, so they let go of all their undisclosed desires.

Ben had never tasted anything sweeter nor more immediately addictive. Rey was caught in his heated rapture. She had never kissed a man, not really. But she could feel both in her heart and on her skin that this was true and real and beautiful. A collision of opposites, closing in a full circle. The kiss kept deepening until it was no longer just a kiss, and together their bodies trembled upon their awakening instincts. And, just as he had foreseen, all was lost.