Ever After

Blood

Firehouse

"Who was that man?" Casey asked emotionlessly. He was leaning back on the windowsill in Boden's office facing the chief whilst Severide was sat on one of the chairs by the desk.

"A reporter," Severide replied, "He's been here before asking for you."

"Ok," he accepted, "And why does he know more than I do? I assume he doesn't know more than the cops?"

"Nesbitt's ankle monitor was found but…" Boden began to explain.

"But no Nesbitt," he said.

Boden shook his head, "No Nesbitt."

"And I hadn't asked about him so no one brought it up in front me?" he questioned.

"He's gone for good Casey," Severide stated.

"That a fact?" he said incredulously because how could Severide know that for sure.

"He won't be back here in Chicago, he's gone," Severide assured him.

Before Casey could respond the alarms went off and Truck 81, along with Ambulance 61 were called to a person in distress.

Severide walked up to Casey in the locker room after their shift finished, "Do you wanna go out for dinner tonight?"

"Dinner?" Casey frowned.

"Dinner," Severide shrugged, "That's what friends do right?"

"I guess," he replied, it was an odd request, they had takeaways, dinner at home and with others from the house but they never just went out for dinner.

"Thought it would make a change from bar crawling," Severide explained.

"I have plans for tonight," he said.

"Oh all right," Severide replied, "And you're…"

"… At the Davison site today," Casey finished.

Severide sighed, "Are we just going to avoid each other because of Nesbitt?"

"No. It would be a bit redundant to argue about it now anyway," he replied. "I do have plans for tonight but we could go for a run together tomorrow evening? I'd rather do that than have dinner."

Apartment

That night Severide lay awake in his bed, the heat was stifling, he'd turned the fan on in his room but still heard Casey enter the apartment over its constant hum, there were muffled voices, he wasn't alone, as they moved across the lounge Severide could make out snippets of conversation.

"God how'd you do that? At work?" a female voiced asked.

"Uh huh," he heard Casey mutter, "You wanna drink?"

She scoffed, "I think we should attend to something else first."

Casey's bedroom door was then opened, slammed closed and he heard nothing more.

"Good night?" Severide asked when Casey emerged from his room the next morning. Apparently the woman that had come home with him hadn't stayed after their late night activities.

"Huh? Yeah it was fine," he said, a little distracted, "I gotta go pick up some supplies and head back over to the Davison site, see ya later." He was out the door with an apple in his hand before Severide could even reply.

Lakeside

"So who was that you brought home last night?" Severide asked as they jogged side by side along the lake front that evening.

"Just some…" Casey began.

"Just some woman," Severide provided.

"Hey I've never complained about you bringing people home," he smiled.

"I'm not complaining," Severide stated.

"Really?" he grinned, "Cause for a second there I thought you were gonna lecture me."

"I don't need to lecture you," Severide replied.

"No, you don't," he said shortly.

After a while Severide spoke up again, this time with concern, "You want a breather?"

"Nah I'm good... or is that your way of saying that can't keep up with my pace?" he grinned.

"You look pale," Severide stated.

"I am pale compared to you," he scoffed. "Race you back to the car?" He'd barely finished the sentence before sprinting off in front of Severide, leaving him no time to protest before he went after him. Casey slowed a little when he caught up and they matched each other's pace back to the car park.

Severide took note of Casey's trembling hands as he took a swig from his water bottle, "How's your chest?"

"It aches," Casey replied honestly, "But it doesn't hurt," he said, "My ribs aren't broken, they're just a little bruised still, this time next week they'll be as good as new."

"Herrmann saw the bruises," Severide said rather lamely. For most of their run he'd been trying think of a way to bring up a certain topic that Casey was unlikely to take kindly.

"Yeah…" he frowned at the oddity of the statement, "I was changing my top, I wouldn't be surprised if he did… and I'm not really surprised that he spoke to you after."

"He was concerned," Severide said.

"I know," he replied with a small shrug. He'd come to expect it of Herrmann after all the years of working with the man.

"He wasn't so much as concerned about the bruises, more about the fact that he thinks you've lost weight," Severide explained.

"He told me, well, stated the obvious really. I know I have," he said dismissively and took another swig from the water bottle.

"Oh, ok," Severide was surprised at Casey's indifference, "Erm… intentionally?"

Casey shook his head and replied lightly, "No."

"I don't need to remind you what happened last time," he edged.

"No," Casey said stiffly, "And besides I'm not ill any more, not even having nightmares." He smiled a little too much for Severides liking.

Apartment

Casey had gone into his bedroom with the intention of showering and changing before they ordered food but he'd fallen asleep on his bed, atop of the bed covers and fully dressed in his running gear.

Severide knocked on Casey's bedroom door; he had showered and was ready to order dinner. When there was no response he entered and a small smile crept across his face when he saw Casey fast asleep. His arm was wrapped around a pillow and hugged close to his chest, a habit that he noticed Casey had developed. Severide assumed it was recent or maybe he'd never really noticed before, it seemed to happen unconsciously, perhaps because his friend had spent so many nights in bed with Hallie or Dawson, maybe it had happened often before when he was alone in bed.

He picked up the folded blanket from the chair in the corner of the room and draped it over Casey. It was warm but Casey was still wearing his clothes that had gotten wet with sweat and his hair was still damp and partly plastered to his forehead. A few years ago Severide would have woken him up but now he would just let him sleep as he never really knew how restful and easy Casey's sleep was nowadays. Severide quietly shut the door behind him and warmed up some leftovers he dug out of the freezer, there was no point in ordering any food now.

Casey woke up several hours later. He sat bolt upright, panting, sweating, shaking, for a moment he thought he was going to throw up all over the bed but he gathered himself, took some deep breaths and countered to ten three times. He lay back down, still taking in long deep breaths, the images left over from his nightmare faded. He sighed and let his eyes drift close again only to be assaulted by the memory of the two dead men, the men he had killed. He shot out of bed, nearly stumbling over the blanket as it followed him off the mattress, burst open the ensuite door, landed heavily on his knees and threw up violently into the toilet.

Once his stomach had emptied and the dry heaving had subsided he felt incredibly weak and incredibly dirty. All he could see was the splatter of blood all over his body, the thick rivulets spread all over him, obscuring his vision, sticking his fingers to one another. With no thought to the clothes he was wearing he stumbled into the shower and switched on the stream of water. It was cold, he didn't think to adjust the temperature. He didn't care. He just wanted to wash away all the grime and blood, he stripped off his clothes and let them fall onto the bottom of the bath as he continued to stand under the heavy stream of water, scrubbing away at his skin.

Severide rolled over in bed, half asleep, he could hear the shower running from the other room, he glanced at his alarm hoping that it wasn't the morning already as it felt like he'd hardly slept. The clock read 01:34. He let his eyes slip close again. The shower was still running the next time he opened his eyes, the clock read 02:06. That wasn't right, why was the shower still running? He pushed the covers back and sat straight up with one thought in his mind. Casey.

He'd rushed to Casey's room and entered the ensuite to find the shower curtain open wide and Casey sat below the heavy stream of water, unmoving with his eyes gazing unseeingly.

"Case? Matt?"

Nothing.

He leant forwards, put his arm through the water and turned the shower off. "Damnit Case, it's freezing."

Still no response. He grabbed one of the large plush towels and draped it around Casey's inert form. He stepped into the bathtub and knelt down in front of Casey.

"Matt? Matty?" Severide sighed disappointingly at the lack of response. "I'm going to touch you," he warned before he gripped Casey's shoulders.

"Sev?" Casey breathed and he looked up into Severide's gently eyes.

"I'm here," he exhaled in relief as he gently pulled Casey forwards into a soft embrace, "You're ok." He could feel Casey's calm breaths on his shoulder. Satisfied that his friend wasn't panicking and didn't seem fazed by the situation he said, "Let's get up, you need to get warm and you need to sleep, it's the middle of the night and we're on shift tomorrow."

Severide guided Casey's lethargic form to bed and pulled back the covers, his hair was still wet but the towel had nearly dried his body so he said nothing as Casey just pulled the towel tighter around him and got into bed. "Night," Casey muttered as Severide pulled the duvet over him.

"Are you going to be ok?" Severide asked.

Casey's response was a barely noticeable shrug before he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep. Severide remained in Casey's room after tidying up the ensuite. He'd been sat on the chair for a couple of hours when he watched as Casey moved under the covers, in his sleep Casey tried to untangle himself from the towel and duvet that had become twisted. Once Casey was on his right side, his left still too sore to lie on, Severide saw an arm creep out from under the covers, he smiled, stood up from the chair and quietly moved one of the pillows under Casey's arm, who grabbed it weakly and slept still for the rest of the night.

"Morning..." Casey spoke blearily when he discovered Severide sat on the chair in the corner of his room.

"Morning," Severide replied.

"Sorry," he stated, "Sorry about last night… this morning." He pushed himself upright, the duvet fell to his lap revealing his scared and bruised chest.

"What happened?" Severide asked.

"Nightmare I guess." He shrugged even though he knew that was exactly what had happened.

"You've remembered what happened?" Severide questioned.

He nodded after a moment.

Severide frowned, "Did something trigger it or…"

"Nope," Casey shook his head.

"Oh ok, I guess that's good?" he questioned, Casey just shrugged, "When's your next session with Lawson?"

"In about two weeks," Casey replied.

"Two weeks?" he repeated with surprise, "You gonna call him today?"

"He's on holiday," Casey replied. Lawson had given him his mobile number and provided him with several numbers to contact other doctors if Casey needed it; he wasn't going to use them. "I'm gonna get dressed," Casey stated.

Severide took it as his cue to stand up and leave. "I'll get some breakfast going, bacon and eggs, you want mushrooms?"

"Nah, I'll eat later, I'm going to go for a run first," he said.

Concerned Severide stated, "We went for a run last night."

Casey nodded, "And I'm going for another now."

"Is that wise?" he scoffed, "I can see your ribs."

"And I can see yours," Casey shrugged.

"Fine, do what you want," he said.

"I will."

Firehouse

"Late night partying? You look exhausted!" Cruz greeted Severide as he walked into the common room at the start of shift.

"Something like that," Severide replied stiffly and went straight for the coffee pot.

With a mug of coffee in his hand Severide made his way to his quarters and was glad to see Casey sat at his desk with a plate of toast and scrambled eggs, he'd showered but not eaten after his run, claiming that he would be late for shift. Severide had offered to drive them both to the house but he'd declined.

Later that day Casey was slumped over his desk writing up his report for the call they had gotten back from an hour ago. He was struggling to concentrate and kept having to go back read what he'd written for fear of repeating it. There was a knock at his door, Herrmann was stood outside with a grim expression on his face, he motioned him in.

"Lieutenant," Herrmann greeted him. "I need your help with something… on the downlow."

"Yeah, sure, close the door," Casey spun round on his chair to face Herrmann who sat down on his bed. "What's up?" he asked with concern.

"Cindy cannot know," Herrmann warned him.

"Erm… this isn't another anniversary present is it?" his concerned ebbed away into a smile.

Herrmann shot him a look.

He shrugged, "Just checking."

"I promised I'd have the wardrobes in the loft room sorted by the end of the week and they're still just pieces of wood lying on the floor," Herrmann explained.

"You need a hand then?" he questioned.

"I just don't have the right tools," Herrmann replied.

"When do you want me to come over?" he asked.

Herrmann smiled, "Cindy has a PTA meeting tomorrow night, six 'til eight?"

"That's fine," he nodded.

"Stay for dinner after," Herrmann smiled, "It's steak night."

"Nah it's all tight, I'll eat at home, you don't want Cindy to wonder why I'm there," he said.

"Fair point," Herrmann said, "Although you have always been welcome to come over."

"It's fine, we'll get it done quickly, she'll never know you didn't do it on your own," he smiled.

"Thanks lieutenant," Herrmann said gratefully.

Apartment

Casey got home late after helping Herrmann. He dropped his keys on the side table and grabbed a bottle of juice from the fridge.

"You've had a busy day," Severide spoke up.

"Yeah, I'm exhausted," he said as he slumped down onto the sofa next to Severide.

"Early night then," Severide said suggestively, "You sleep all right last night?"

"Uh huh," he nodded.

"Good," Severide smiled.

Casey hadn't slept well last night. After tossing and turning for a few hours he decided to get up and sit at his desk, flicking through a few internet pages on his laptop before getting back into bed where he spent the rest of the night reading, he didn't want to sleep, he didn't want to wake up in the firehouse disoriented and confused like he had done at home the previous night.

He bid Severide goodnight after watching another half hour of TV with him. Showered and brushed his teeth. He'd opened the bathroom cabinet for a new tube of toothpaste and eyed the orange pot of blue pills that had been sat unused for over a year. He rinsed and glanced at the orange pot once more, he was exhausted, he really needed to sleep and that's exactly what the pills were for so he took two and dry swallowed them.

TBC