I wake up from a horribly graphic nightmare at 4 AM. I can`t help sobbing because of all of the memories that have been brought back lately. And now I feel like I won`t be able to resist making myself throw up. Maybe it is made worse by my past, I don`t know. I feel embarrassed, and guilty for waking me up at this time, but if I don`t I know I`ll end up making myself throw up, and all of my progress will be over because I always spiral down after I do it once. I climb into the other bed, where Uncle Jason is and cuddle up right next to him. He stirs a little, but my quiet sobs aren`t quite enough to wake him, so I gently shake him. He opens his eyes and sees me there. He hugs me as I shake and gasp with the sobs.
"What`s wrong Lexy?" he asks gently.
"I had... a nightmare. I`m s-sorry. I didn`t want to wake you but- but I want to make myself throw up and I can`t calm down," I say through my sobbing.
"Shh. It`s ok. You can wake me up whenever you need to," Uncle Jason whispers and hugs me tightly. I lay my head againt him, and sob even harder.
"I-I`m scared," the dispair I hear in my own voice actually makes me more scared. I hate that I`m acting like this, and in front of the person who I admire more than anything too, but it seems like everytime I try to calm myself I just get more hysterical.
The next thing I know, I`m waking up. I don`t even remember falling asleep, but I guess all of the crying just exhausted me. The sun is coming in the window and the clock says it`s 8 now. Uncle Jason walks out of the bathroom dressed and ready to go. When he sees that I`m awake, he sits on the end of the bed and smiles at me.
"How you feeling?"
I smile weakly, feeling a little embarrassed as I remember last night and I remember telling him about being raped, "I`m ok. Thank you for letting me stay here last night."
"Well I`m glad I did. I wouldn`t want you to be alone when you`re so upset. Get ready. We`re going to talk to Hotch, ok?"
I hate that we have to, but I know that stalkers can be dangerous. Especially when this one started out as a rapist. I get ready quickly. I just want to get this over and done with.
I had to tell Hotch everything about the stalker. And I had to give them as much information and a little bit of a profile of each of the three men. It was horrible. Hotch then asked for anything that I had that he`d sent me. I`d actually kept it all in a box because I knew that this was stalker behavior and throwing it out meant throwing out clues. Even though she hadn`t written anything, she somehow felt embarrassed to have them reading it. They had an agent pick the box up at my house, and he found a large package with the same handwriting on my doorstep. They sent it over as quickly as possible, and the team basically stopped working on the case to look through it. To my horror, Morgan opened the new package and found my panties from college, copies of all of the very graphic pictures from the rape- and there was more than half a box full-, some sexual pictures of the stalker, and a lengthy five page letter. As soon as I looked over the table and realized that Morgan had seen very private pictures of me. I bolted. I couldn`t stand the humiliation.
Reid came out after me, which was nice of him after how I`d been treating him since he found out. He but an arm around me. He was awkwardly standing next to me. I could tell that he didn`t know if he should say anything. His cute awkwardness made me feel at least a little bit better. I turned and hugged him. He was surprised for a second, but then I felt him hugging me back.
"Can you stay with me when I`m in protective custody?" I mumbled.
"Yeah," he said back. He sounded thoroughly embarrassed, which was odd. Then I realized that I was pressed up against him and he had the beginning of an erection. I was really happy about that, for some reason, and I wanted to laugh, but I didn`t because he`d probably think I was laughing at him.
A/N: I`m sorry that I take forever to update. I hope this chapter lives up to the other ones. Thank you for reading! Add to your alert list if you haven`t already.