The Way, The War, And The End – Chapter 11
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the HDM characters in this chapter except for Lily Bailey, and Warren Patterson. Oh I forgot to make a disclaimer for Jennifer and Janurius! I'm not particularly sure whether or not Warriors of Hrat is mine, I just came up with it on the spot; so that means the creation is also mine. Is it??
Sorry, I haven't been writing, I was halfway through this chapter when I hit an invisible wall, I tried bashing it with whatever my mind could muster. I could see what was going to happen but I still couldn't break through this unseen barrier to get this chapter moving! This was an interesting chapter to write, I honestly can't think of any detail I could possibly add to such a critical moment. Recommendations anyone?
Will found himself walking along a dim hallway, there did not seem to be an end to the hallway, Kirjava was walking alongside Will. There were doors, Will tried to open some of them but none gave way. 'Where are we?' Will asked.
'I'm not sure but lets keep going…' said Kirjava, 'wait… is that a doorway right ahead!'
Will squinted forward, and there was a door right ahead of them, they moved from a stroll into a quick paced jog straight to the end of the hallway. As Will put his hand on the handle he felt a surge of uneasiness, but he could feel something familiar. 'Kirjava something isn't right…'
'I know I can feel it too Will…' Kirjava said, and both looked behind to find themselves closed in. There were nothing but walls around them. Only the door stood there, wanting to be opened. 'But I think there's no where else to go but forward.'
Will slowly slid open the door, and found himself in a room with several doors, Will could feel something familiar emitting from the doors. Without hesitating Will opened the door…
Will found himself in his old house, the same house he and his mum lived in during his childhood. He then saw two men pass through him as though Will was a ghost. At that moment, Will knew exactly where he was. 'Kirjava… this is where it all started…' And Will remembered the man he accidently killed. Will went through the door, and Kirjava followed. Both jumped at the sight of Will's twelve year old self, Will could see his old cat, Moxie, coming out of the bedroom. He could remember every detail of that incident. The man shone the light through the gap at the door and began to head towards it. As the door opened, Will's twelve year old self was ready, but neither of them saw the cat. And the man tripped over Moxie, tumbled down the stairs, and Will could remember that hideous crack he heard, but he never looked back at it.
The scene faded as the twelve year old Will ran out the door. Will found himself in the same room and so he opened another door, this time he found himself walking on familiar ground, but exactly what moment he arrived pained him. Will found himself at the grove. He watched as his twelve year old self and Lyra come out from the bushes. Will watched as they sat down and ate. He could remember that day as if it were only yesterday that it had happened. Then it happened. Will watched as Lyra take one of the little red fruits and bring it to his mouth. Will started to tear up. 'Why is this memory so painful…?' Will wondered. And the scene faded away.
This time he found himself at school at around the time he was sixteen. 'Wait, why are we here?' Will wondered, 'nothing special happened this day… hmm…' and then he saw his sixteen year old self, politely declining several girls' requests to take them to the year ten prom. In a distance he saw Lily Bailey, a girl roughly as tall as himself with dark blonde hair, with green eyes just like Will; skirts seemed to be her fashion as Will noticed she often wore skirts instead of jeans. Will often took a glance at her and quietly chuckled half-heartedly to himself as he thought how similar she resembled Lyra. But there would never be a relationship; it would be a lie full stop. The scene faded once more and he found himself in the same room he started with.
This time Will opened a door that found his other self in front of Xaphania. Will could hear himself yelling and kicking at dirt as his other self raged on about the news Xaphania had given. Will found himself crying even more, 'The day that we were told we could never see each other again until death was the day I thought it was all over for me…' Before he could even take another glance at the scene, it had faded…
'I think that will do…' said a voice.
Both Will and Kirjava turned around to find an exactly identical Will wearing the exact same clothes. 'Who are you?' asked Will.
'I think you might know, look deep down into the deepest corners of your heart and you will know…' said the other Will.
'I still don't know…' Will said.
'I am that voice in your head telling you what you want to hear and do. But do you follow me?' the other Will said, 'I don't think so, and look where that's ended up! You've been wanting Lyra for the past five years when those five years could have been spent with her!'
'You don't understand, I had no choice…' Will said, 'Xaphania said…'
'There wasn't an option?' The other Will questioned, 'Bull crap! You still had a choice but no… you were too weak to stand up to the likes of an angel. They're just another sentient being; they're no different from us. Do you understand what she was trying to do?'
'Separating us, would prevent Dust from leaking out the windows we would create,' Will said loudly, 'and avoid anymore Spectres, we have to build the republic of heaven and spread the message otherwise Dust cannot continue flowing and the dead will have no peace….'
'Oh forget about the dead you weak fool!' The other Will mocked, 'the dead are of no concern to you, what about the murderers, the criminals, every person who makes everyone else's lives miserable! Are you going to give them peace? They deserve to die and live a horrible afterlife! You don't even see it do you!' Will crumbled to his knees and now the other Will shouted, 'you were too weak to stand up to Xaphania that day, you know even now you can't protect Lyra! Because you were weak, pain is all you'll ever feel and know!'
'Will do not listen!' Kirjava thought.
'But he is right; I couldn't protect Lyra from that bullet…' Will thought.
'But you were hit too!' Kirjava thought, 'and you're not dead and you know it otherwise we'd be meeting the old boatman! William Parry, you are not weak and you know exactly why!'
'You're wrong,' said Will as he stood up. He took a pause and continued, 'I'm stronger than you'll ever be! How many people would give up their one and only love for the world! I doubt many would. I love Lyra with all my heart and soul, but I was strong enough to give her up for the sake of everyone, regardless of what pain came in the way. I was unprepared for any of the pains I have experienced, but I kept standing! I kept standing in the pain! I don't regret that day when we left each other…'
'Why?' the other Will inquired
And with a smile Will said, 'Because I know Lyra doesn't regret it either!'
And with that the other Will said, 'You are really stubborn, but tell me this… do you know exactly what is happening, I mean, what is really going on here, do you have any idea of the intentions of everyone else around you.'
'Why are you asking me this?' Will asked.
'Because, like I said in the beginning…' the other Will said,' I tell you what you want to hear but in this case I'm telling you what you need to know! I don't think you'll be seeing me again so farewell…'
And Will felt himself being pulled back, and watched as the other Will disappeared from sight. Will found himself to weak to fight back, and so he let himself get pulled back and closed his eyes.
Elsewhere, Lyra walks in a fog, hugging Pan close to her. Lyra walks aimlessly, not knowing where she was but having recollected what had happened, she remembered Will holding her close, but despite Will offering himself as a shield for her, both were hit nonetheless. Whispering to Pan, she said, 'Pan, are we dead?'
'No, I don't think we're dead,' Pan said, 'if we were, we'd see the boatman by now… something isn't right, I can feel it at the tips of fur.'
'I can feel it too,' Lyra said, 'I'm getting this familiar feeling, but it feels too familiar…' As she looks around, she does not notice the door she knocked into. 'Where did this come from?' She grabbed the door handle, turned it slowly at first, and pushed the door wide open.
Lyra found herself in that same room, where he had just saved his father from being poisoned. Lord Asriel hurried her twelve year old self into the cupboard. 'Pan, this is where it all started!' she said as his father began his theory on other worlds as he showed images of Dust. The scene faded before she could see the head. Lyra found herself at a ball, less than a week after her fourth visit to the Botanic Gardens since they both left their separate ways.
'What?' Lyra exclaimed with a touch of annoyance, 'what is so interesting about this? I know we go to balls like once a week! What makes this one so special…?' Lyra then watched her sixteen year old self as she politely declined man after man as they attempt to flirt with her. Lyra then eyed upon a man halfway across the ballroom. His name was Warren Patterson, a handsome young man, with dark brown hair, and blue eyes as rich as Lyra's; he also had a dark blue cat resembling very much like Kirjava. Warren attended these balls at St. Sophias simply because of his roommates, and would usually sit near a window and watch the night go by. Lyra looked in his direction many times before and wondered how similar he resembled Will, she chuckled at herself and told Pan how alike he was to Will. Despite this, Lyra didn't want to get involved in a relationship with another man, because no matter how hard she would try, she would never forget about Will. The scene faded and Lyra found herself in a room with only one door.
As Lyra touched the doorknob, a shiver went down her spine, as if knowing there was something horrible behind this door, she looked around; there was only her, Pan and the door in front of her. With nowhere to go but through the door, Lyra twisted the doorknob and pushed it wide open. Of all the memories, Lyra found herself at Cittagazze, at the very moment, she and Will said goodbye to each other, and kissed for what was supposed to be the last time they would kiss. Lyra began to tear up, 'This memory is in the past… so why does it hurt?'
'Because it's your past,' said a voice.
Lyra turned around to find an exactly identical Lyra, wearing identical clothes… but no daemon. 'Who are you?' demanded Lyra. Lyra had never seen anything like it, and hugged Pan close to her chest.
'Oh c'mon, surely you know who I am,' the other Lyra said, looking at her with a joking smile, then getting no reaction from Lyra, she said, 'okay… I see you don't know me as well as you thought you did…'
'I honestly don't know who you are,' said Lyra.
'Well, and I thought you could tell tales as tall as Jordan's towers,' the other Lyra said.
And almost instantly, Lyra saw someone familiar, more than familiar; she was this familiar person, 'Y-y-you are me when I was a young girl… how is this even possible?' Lyra was looking at herself when she was a child.
'Never mind how, the question here is why,' the other Lyra said.
'Okay why?' Lyra said.
'I'm here to talk to you about Will,' the other Lyra said.
'What about Will?' Lyra said.
'Like why didn't you go against Xaphania's word?' said the other Lyra.
'Why didn't I?' Lyra exclaimed, 'I had no choice, the knife was creating Spectres and Dust was leaking out every second, and the dead…'
'Woah, slow down…' the other Lyra said, 'you had a choice, go against Xaphania's word or follow it. You could have saved yourself a lot of pain.'
'But that's all in the past!' said Lyra, 'we've found a way to be with each other without any consequences.' Lyra noticed this Lyra's attitude became different.
'The past isn't something you can run, hide or cover from, it's with you for life, and you have to deal with it,' said the other Lyra, 'who knows whether or not you would have found the way if you stuck with Will, how long has it been… FIVE YEARS! Five years of pain, and suffering, when those five years could have been spent with Will in absolute bliss! Have you thought about the rules of the worlds? No one can live ten years in a different world without dying…'
'No!' Lyra shouted, 'but…'
'Have you thought about where you and Will would settle? Where you would live? Have you no thought for the future?' the other Lyra questioned.
Lyra crumbled to the ground and thought, 'She's right, I haven't any answers to such simple questions, but…'
'Lyra!' Pan thought hard, 'don't listen, there is something dark about this Lyra, remember, you did what you did because of Will, you became a better person because of him, who knows who or where'd we be if we didn't meet Will in Cittagazze. Lyra Silvertongue, because of your past, you've become a better person, despite all the pain we've been through, it has all lead up to this moment, now show this Lyra who you are!'
Lyra slowly stood up and said, 'I ain't got the answers to such questions, but I know Will and I will work it out. You said I can't run from my past; despite all the pain and suffering I have been through, all that has pointed me in this direction! If me and Will weren't separated, we would forget the job we were given to carry out, and drown ourselves in the love we shared back then… I'm smart enough to see that now and I sure as hell know that I don't regret leaving Will back then!'
'Why?' inquired the other Lyra.
'I don't know…,' Lyra said looking down sheepishly, 'I know he doesn't regret it because…'
'Because what?' the other Lyra said.
Lyra then looked up and said, 'Because he's Will.'
'Ha! You are a stubborn one, but nonetheless, I think you've already noticed something strange,' said the other Lyra , 'aren't you gonna ask?'
'Who are you really?' Lyra asked, 'you stopped acting like me a while ago, who are you really?'
'I am the side of you that is concerned with time,' the other Lyra said, 'I am concerned with the past, the present and the future.'
'Are you evil?' Lyra said.
'We aren't evil,' said the other Lyra.
'Wait, who's we?' Lyra said.
'I've said too much,' the other Lyra said, 'you will find out quite soon who we is. Oh and one more thing, I am dealing with the present here. Do you know exactly what you are doing, I mean really understand the purpose of this escapade. Do you know the intentions of everyone around you excluding Will in this case?'
'What does this have to do with the present?' Lyra said.
'Everything!' the other Lyra said, 'I think it's time we parted ways, I don't think we'll see each other again though so goodbye…'
Lyra felt herself being tugged back but suddenly became too weak and tired to fight it, and let herself get dragged as she watched the other Lyra fade away in the distance before closing her eyes…
Well, how'd you like this chapter, delicious, nearly 3000 words, to make up for the lack of words in the last chappy P. Any MAJOR errors plz let me know straightaway! Anyways plz review, would love to hear from readers. Oh, I am also looking for a proof reader; if you are interested plz send your email to and include a 100+ word note on why I should let you be my proof reader. For the ppl I may consider, I will ask a few questions before I choose my proof reader. Don't ask why I want a proof reader, I have my own reasons. P Oh, one more thing, did I mention I am now 15? (Don't ask when, just know I am now 15)