A/N: Some of you may have been wondering why I've sort of left this fan fiction on the back burner for so long, and simply put, it's because the idea of mortality, how fleeting life really is, how fragile it can possibly be, really hit home for me these past few months, after having lost my uncle to cancer.
I'm not looking for a pity party, things like that happen to people every day…it's merely my stated reason as to why I had no interest to pick this fiction up for a while. I just didn't want my negativity to seep into this story, as I noticed it had been trying to do every time I sat down to write.
It's a fit of luck (not sure of good or bad) that this chapter got finished this month at all. Truth be told, I was going to take another month away from this fiction, however, four sleepless night in a row leads to roundabout thinking, and occasionally you get diamonds in the rough.
Although, I will admit, chapter 11 is strictly that…a diamond I've tried to polish up to the best of my ability while I'm trying to get back into the swing of this fiction, and it's happening slowly and surely. It's just taken longer than I thought it would.
Chapter 11
It may seem trite to say this, but even this record can't possibly escape the fact that creation, and its many peoples, are very willing to drown within their own wells of hypocrisy. Let me see if I can adequately describe the problem.
Let's start with mortals. Humans. That's a good place to start. They are not exempt from their own ideal of right and wrong. Moreover, they haven't grasped that their actions have far reaching consequences. Not that they should know such a thing, but, even so, I find it odd that they haven't.
Why?
Well, even in blindness, immortals must realize that someone, somewhere, will suffer because of our action, or perhaps inaction. We know this because it is the way creation works. Frankly put, the system force bespeaks it.
In light of that, I feel the urge to remind the souls that read this passage that while mortals are not always correct about their ideals and faiths, there is something uncanny, not to mention true, about their assumptions of Judeo-Christianity. It is often the strongest of the heavens that fall from the light of grace. The bible has many tales of this...and it is true.
After all, it is not uncommon for a god or goddess to turn to a darker path. How does the bible translate?
Take the story of Satan, if you will. He was considered one of the most powerful, and beautiful angels of the heavens. He fell from the grace of heavenly light when he thought himself above the others around him. If you don't believe me, search the scriptures. You'll find it amusing I'm sure. Such a hypocritical book, to be sure, but that too, is true of creation.
There are so many laws, so many morally questionable areas within creation, that it is little more than a breeding ground for hypocrisy at its most basic core…but, I digress…
Anyway, just like Satan, the demons of the many hells are quite the same. That is to say, that many demons of power, many unholy figureheads govern the countless districts of the bowels. Of them, none are more powerful than ones who were once graced with the light of the heavens.
Perhaps it is because they chose such a path of darkness, or maybe it is because those born native to the hellfire planes do not think it wise to anger beings who quite clearly have no qualms about upheaving the very foundation of creation itself. Whatever the case may be, I can assure you there is nothing more fearsome than a divinity gone rouge.
How do I know this? My mother is among them.
And, so am I.
-Urd, protector of the well. Norn of the past. Demon first class, heir to the onyx throne. Progenitor of the scorned race of both the holy, and unholy land.
"Remind me again, how do we find this to be a blessing?" Belldandy asked, leaning over a very large bowl, too ill to move about. Breakfast had gotten away from her yet again as her tummy tumbled in dismay.
"Mortal women were never meant to have an easy time of it, of that I assure you." Aphrodite said, idly knitting some little clothes in a gender neutral sunshine yellow. "However, you can give me that atrocity now, you won't be needing it." She said taking the birthing book from Belldandy's bedside, plunking it in the trash where she felt it belonged.
"I was reading that you know." Belldandy lamented as another wave of nausea hit.
"Bell dear, if there's one thing I know well, it's about the workings of a womb." Aphrodite chuckled, as she put her knitting aside, and instead, taking pity on the poor mortal women before her, focused her energies to quell the demanding child growing within her. A gentle light emitted from her fingertips, and instant calm flooded over Belldandy in a way her body hadn't experienced all day…and arguably, all week. "You should not be reading that tripe, it wouldn't due for a woman of your make to be brainwashed by such trash."
Belldandy sagged back into bed, and nodded, but felt unsure of those facts. "I don't know if Keiichi will take comfort in that."
"He will, if you will." Aphrodite told her. "The child is within you, and as such, it's your job to assure Keiichi that you understand your own body, and the child within." As she went back to her knitting she smiled. "The women of old had nothing but instinct to draw upon, and they were just fine without all of the beeping machines, metals, and plastics."
"Some mortals might disagree with you." Belldandy smirked, but the amusement didn't reach her eyes.
"Those selfsame mortals know nothing of the body you possess." Aphrodite took a breath and closed her eyes, noticing that no other mortal were in the area, she decided to bespeak something that had gone on untold to Belldandy. "You may not say this to anyone of blood and bone." Aphrodite warned before licking her lips. "However, you should know a goddess's body and a mortal woman's body share one very similar thing in common."
"Oh, and what exactly might that be?" Belldandy asked, sitting upright to take a drink of water. The nausea was starting to come back.
"The dimensional space that harbors life. We both share the disconnected space that's located between the living and the dead." The goddess explained with a soft grin. "The place where souls go before redemption, damnation, or reincarnation." Aphrodite said, pointing to the triangle region that sat below Belldandy's belly. "Women of any make unknowingly tap into that space. The womb is in essence, a four dimensional rift crammed into a third dimensional paradox."
"I never realized a mortal woman could be connected to such a space." Belldandy murmured.
"Why do you think their bellies grow so big?" Aphrodite nodded. "Or that in a mortal's case, they're even able to dilate large enough to actually push an infant from their body, when normally, they can't alter body structure?"
Belldandy hadn't ever given thought to that, had never needed to. With a shake of her head, she smiled in spite of herself. "None of that honestly ever occurred to me." It did however, explain some of her mortal ailments of pregnancy as well. The horrific feelings of a body being forced to change in ways it normally would not. "It's strange to think that another creature, especially a mortal, would be connected to such a finicky thing as multidimensional reassignment."
"Oh, there are limitations." Aphrodite shrugged. "The ability to do so in a mortal is all subject to time, and as you know, that space is not without susceptibility to ailments." As she cleared her throat, she wondered just how much Belldandy knew about pregnancy in immortals, and suspected such knowledge was not something she had studied deeply. "However, that dimensional space, the place where the life's spirit is produced from, is the exact same place. In light of this, a goddess will always be more qualified to handle childbirth than a mortal."
"You learn something new every day." Belldandy said, slightly amazed, and even bewildered to some small extent. "However, I believe I will understand it better when I gain my powers of a goddess back."
…
Academics weren't a cup of tea for everyone in the house, and Urd wasn't about to listen in on the complex details of paradoxes. She had a very good understanding of them already, and had no desire to further educate herself in that topic. Instead, she decided to relax outside, taking in the fresh air, and the song birds in the trees.
"Now that's a sight for sore eyes." Urd laughed as she said on her favorite rock, watching as Keiichi dumped all of his baggage at the foot of the door. "I can't even remember the last time I saw you in something like that."
Keiichi looked down at himself. "I crashed at Megumi's place last when the plane came in. I hadn't visited in a while, and I wanted to make sure she was taking care of herself." Beat up jeans and a white dirt covered shirt made up his attire, and even the sneakers he had on had seen better days. "This is all she had from when I used to spend time over there after auto club."
"It suits you better." She told him. "I never did get used to you in suits. Mortals age so fast." In fact, his patchy five-o-clock shadow proved it. The scruffy hairs on his face were not something that grew in so quickly back when he was in university. "Belldandy's inside, but I think she's still sleeping."
"I hope so." He said with a laugh, even though there was a worried truth in his statement. "She's been pushing herself too hard."
"Not anymore, Chihiro has banned her from coming to work until she gets over that morning sickness of hers." Urd said with a shake of her head. "I think she's bored since Aphrodite won't let her do any of her usual housework either."
"Well, I think I picked up just the thing for that." He said with a wink, pulling a box from his bag. "I thought she could use a relaxing hobby, and scrapbooking is pretty popular. A lot of new moms get into it…just like they get into the baby books all the time."
"Remind me to hide when you give that to her." Urd muttered.
"Why's that?" He asked as he packed the box back to the way it was.
"She's been getting into the nesting thing recently." Urd explained with a roll of her eyes. "If she's moved your futon once since you've been gone this weekend, she's moved it ten times…and every time she does, she sighs about how she doubts that a crib will fit in the same room."
"When Megumi and I were babies, we slept in a drawer." Keiichi laughed then. "Our parents didn't believe in buying unnecessary things, so for the first few months, we were either sleeping on one of them, or sleeping in a pulled out drawer next to their bed." Then, a distant memory made him smile. "I've heard story about how whenever dad was puttering around in the garage, he's just plop me in the drawer and bring me outside with him. I guess he wanted to start early."
"Now that, I can believe." Urd told him with a soft smile. "There is something to be said for the days of old, when such a thing took place often. Children were humbled gifts of creation, once upon a time. They went with their parents everywhere."
Keiichi nodded, pulling open one of the doors that would lead into the living room, stepping through and leaving his bags right outside, where the rest of the linens would probably be gathered as always before someone set about to washing them. When Belldandy wasn't in the back yard, living room, or kitchen, he looked in the bedroom.
The sight made him grin. The napping woman seemed to have very indignantly wound up with a cloth resting over her eyes, and an ice basin nearby.
"Oh, Keiichi, I'm glad you're finally home." A quiet voice said from within the depths of the darkness, as two very feral eyes seemed to glower in the distance. "I don't know where it is you seem to disappear to every so often, but perhaps you should consider not doing so."
"It's not like I have a choice." He told the rather large feline before him. "If my boss tells me to do something, I kind of have to do it."
"Boss…" The goddess tasted the word before something lit up on her features. "Oh! A slave driver you mean." Even her animal form, she could still offer a grin, though it looked sinister for anyone who gazed at her. "I should think you're a well coveted little mortal if you're released from his confines so often."
"Get a grip, Bastet." Urd said, floating into the house, to peep in on her resting sister, happy the woman had finally found some measure of relaxation. "This is modern japan, not some third world country. Slavery is outlawed."
"Huh…" The goddess said before prancing off, Urd following in tow. "That explains a lot."
"Never a dull moment." He muttered to himself as he closed his bedroom door behind him. Deciding to lay down beside his sleeping wife. He placed a hand over hers, smiling to himself as she didn't stir. It was such a deep sleep that it amused him. "Once a goddess, always a goddess."
…
She had made the all too willing mistake of forgoing any pretense of caring after she awoke that there was indeed a world, and a life, outside of her bedroom. When her eyes had fluttered open, Keiichi was there, and there was nothing more soothing to her heart than his embrace.
Being the emotional woman she was, she would cry if he had been away too long, and when her hormones were on a rampage due to the growing child inside of her, she couldn't say it made it any easier.
In fact, there were days that purely because she was pregnant, she missed him all the more. Whishing he was there to comfort her. Although she had to admit, she was thankful he could be the only monitory provider for the house, which wasn't easy when one considered Urd's booze consumption.
It wasn't even as if Belldandy wanted constant attention, because more often than not, she really wanted to be left alone to experience the changes to her person…ones, she honestly hadn't expected. Breast soreness was among the many complaints she had about aches and pains, but dizziness and nausea were quite bad as well, especially about four weeks in…and, unfortunately for her, they had yet to subside.
She was even beginning to experience sensitivity to particular smells, one whiff would send her fleeing for the bathroom.
Fatigue was beginning to be another problem that seemed to rear its ugly head, but it was also one that Belldandy had grown quite used to. Sleep had always been a regenerative source of energy in her past, and thankfully, it was the one symptom she wasn't bothered about…though it did mean that she found herself in bed quite a bit.
Among all of the changes in her body, and her life, she was blissfully happy about one thing. The house was quiet. As she sat up in bed, Keiichi handed her a glass of milk, since water seemed to be harsh on her stomach. "Is Megumi doing alright?"
"She more worried about you. We've got to do something about all of the strange things going on around here, Megumi's starting to notice." Keiichi said, scratching the back of his head. "She wanted to come visit, but then she saw Bastet on the roof, and that sacred her. The fib I've got going on is that she's Skuld's new pet."
"I knew it was only a matter of time." She had to admit, stretching the truth about a wild animal taking residence in their home would probably be a hindrance. It was one of those rare times a little white lie was better than to risk breaking the very foundation that mortal faith stood upon. "The one thing to keep in mind about Bastet is that she once lived as a huntress among humans for a short time. That was in a time and place long ago, in an environment conducive to her rather lacking style of dress."
"It can't be any worse, can it?" Keiichi asked then, causing Belldandy to give him a bemused smile.
"She walks around with her breasts exposed, her dress actually starts underneath them on a good day." Belldandy offered, though the color beginning to form on Keiichi's cheeks prompted her to continue. "There are times she wears even less than that. One of the reasons she enjoys walking around in cat forms so much is that it's like walking nude."
"That would be bad." Keiichi admitted swallowing hard. "Can't she put on a normal dress, or something?"
"To Bastet, that kind of attire is normal." Belldandy sighed, just because she could fib all day and every day in her mortal form, it went against her moral constitution. There were times though that she hadn't exactly fibbed, but had stretched the truth enough for others not to question the odd explosions and questionable robotics Skuld got into trouble for. it was the thought of the youngest norn that made Belldandy offer a true smile. "I suppose I should just be thankful that Skuld finally gave up the fight. She went on a stroll with Aphrodite today."
"So, she's starting to warm up to Aphrodite then?" Keiichi asked, but Belldandy shook her head.
"Skuld's reception to new people has never really been warm. In Aphrodite's case, Skuld's already subjected to the murmurs of the heavens." She sipped on her milk and yawned, leaning against her husband as he wrapped his arms around her. "As such, I made a bargain with her."
"A contract?" He asked, amused when she smiled at him.
"An informal one, but yes." Belldandy said. "I told Skuld to give Aphrodite an honest chance while I was a mortal, and if she wasn't interested in receiving training any further once I became a goddess again, that I would appeal the council directly. I'd have them put a freeze on Skuld's training, and I would begin to train in Aphrodite's certification."
"Sounds kind of complicated." Keiichi muttered, all of the talk of licenses were enough to confuse him on a good day. "I thought you already had a first class license."
"I do, commercially." Belldandy said slowly, wondering how best to explain. "But, to think about it in an earthly application, well…" Belldandy trailed off, nibbling on her lower lip, before a thought came to mind. "It's like when we had those part time jobs at the corner store. It's literally like a customer service rep that you'd find here on earth, and while it's a very important function on a blanket level, many goddesses choose to do it. It's not by any means a difficult task." She shrugged then. "Skuld's a debugger, and Urd is qualified to run Yggdrasil as a system administrator. Those are much more complicated fields of work."
In fact, the more she thought about it, the more she realized how much more training she could choose to do in her life. "I'm no more qualified as a goddess, than a person with a bachelor's degree from a university. Just like how you chose to get a master's degree, there's license specializations that gods and goddesses can train to get."
Keiichi merely hugged her a little more securely, resting his forehead on her shoulder as he kissed the back of her neck. "I don't know how you do it…because university life put me through the ringer."
"You'd get bored otherwise." Belldandy told him, closing her eyes and tilting her head to give him more access. "Immortals live such long lives. For some training others is a form of entertainment."
…
Even if Belldandy wouldn't admit it, Aphrodite was one such goddess that took joy in her pupils. She had many children whom she raised in her younger years, but now that she was older and wiser, she enjoyed youths that were not her own. Some were a real challenge, and Aphrodite liked a good one to pass the time.
It had taken four years for Skuld to come out of hiding enough to converse with her. Four years of waiting just to yield a response that was a little more invested than Skuld's usual sporadic greeting. Surely, this walk was gifted obligatorily out of politeness alone, but even that was a gift.
Sometimes, Skuld wasn't even in the mood to be friendly. This was their first stroll through the streets of the city as teacher and student. While there wasn't any teaching going on, at least Skuld wasn't trying to avoid her either. Aphrodite let herself be dragged from store to store, and all of the places they went spoke of Skuld's first category backgrounds.
Hardware stores seemed to appeal the most to her, but there had been a few computer stores that had also attracted Skuld's eye, and Aphrodite had to admit, those were out of the realm of her expertise. It had been so long since she stayed on earth that their newfangled ways confused her.
"Who needs a calculator when an abacus works just as well?" She'd lamented after Skuld started playing around with ones that had unusually large screens.
"This is a scientific calculator." Skuld had told her in an offhanded reproach. "It's different."
"And this…" Aphrodite said, holding up one of the newest brands of smart phones. "A remote perhaps?"
"A cell phone." Skuld muttered, not exactly surprised that Aphrodite hadn't any idea what most of the items in the store were, or how to use them.
"And this…what is this thing?!" Her horrified expression got Skuld's attention. Frantically Aphrodite tapped a large square screen where fish seemed to be swimming about, but she could detect no life forms. "The poor creatures…" She frowned as they swam away from her finger every time she poked the screen, and not even the warm light of her fingertips could sooth them. "They must have had their souls sealed away in this contraption."
"They're not real." Skuld said quiet enough that no one would hear. "They're just a little screen saver." She pushed the button on the tablet, and the screen came to life with games and all sorts of other little show pieces. "This is like the smart phone, but bigger, and you can't call people on it."
"Redundant, isn't it?" Aphrodite said with a shake of her head. "Not to mention cruel, those poor fish."
"They don't have any feelings, it's a primitive mortal program." A little quieter, Skuld voiced a question that had been on her mind a while. "You're a second category goddess. Why would they pair you with a first category like myself?"
It was the first major breakthrough, and Aphrodite took it. "Because no matter what category you are, you still have an angel, and that reflection of your soul needs a safe harbor." Aphrodite nodded to the door, and Skuld followed out of curiosity alone. They went around to the back alley where no one would see a thing. "Those with commercial licenses work with others, reach out to them, and connect with them. Goddesses like myself and Belldandy exist because creation can't survive on computing skills."
There was a puddle of water in the back. "The other thing to consider, Skuld, is that you and I share one fundamental thing in common. We are water based deities at our most basic element." Aphrodite held out her hand. "Trust me?"
Skuld made no move at first. "Where are we going?"
The elder goddess pushed some of her blond hair behind her ear. "My home of course."
"I don't think going to heaven is a very good idea." Skuld said hesitantly before Aphrodite burst out in laughter. The musical lilt in her voice was breathtaking, and while the woman was so at ease, it was hard for Skuld not to regard her mentor with just a bit of acceptance, though it was a fine line between that and uncertainty. "What's so funny?" An upraised eyebrow only seemed to further amuse the goddess before her.
"You are very much your mother's daughter." Aphrodite said, recalling when a much younger Anzasu would eye Bastet with the selfsame scrutiny and borderline trepidation. "We're going to my birthplace in the sea." She said then, as if Skuld had been silly to assume otherwise. "I believe it would appeal to Noble Scarlet."
…
"Hild turned off the recording that Mara had brought to her, not at all amused of the current standings found on earth. Goddesses…" Hild sighed, rubbing the side of her head as a migraine tore into her. "I will never understand why Urd amuses herself with them…"
"I don't know either." Mara said, sitting cross legged in a floating position. "I can't get close with that big animal around."
Hild grinned at that. "Bastet is more than an animal. She's an elder goddess of fine make." In fact, Hild recalled her younger years, and her childhood in the heavens was one that forged some lasting bonds, even if they were questionable at best. "She's not a beast to be chained, although, I wouldn't advise you to get on her bad side."
"Elder goddess or not, I doubt they'd be the type to ask me in for tea." Mara just huffed an angry breath, crossing her arms. "Lady Hild, Urd isn't going to see eye to eye with me on this."
"Urd is fond of you, Mara." Hild said quietly. "Perhaps she could use a little more convincing, but there is no demon better suited to my daughter."
Mara didn't dare to question Hild's choice in the matter, as defying her queen in any way would result in unspeakable consequences. "I've tried to feel out the situation, but I don't know." However, Mara wasn't as dumb as many made her out to be, and the fact of the matter was, Urd didn't seem interested. "Maybe she's just not into women."
"Urd is afraid." Hild said quietly. "She lives a life drenched in fear, and struggles to find acceptance." In fact, if there was any good reason to hate the heavens, it was their less than satisfactory way of dealing with Urd directly. Many thought her inferior, and others wished not to think of Tyr's moment of weakness…however, it was the reminder that a god could love a demon at all that bothered heaven the most.
That Urd maintained her desire to be a goddess was not a problem Hild trifled with…however, it did concern her that the best romance Urd had found was a plum tree spirit all too willing to take advantage of her. In contemplation of that, Hild shook her head. "Urd is not discriminate of gender, not in beings such as ourselves where such a discrimination is so easily amended." No…it was something deeper…something more profound. "As it stands, I see only three plausible outcomes. Truth be told, I hate goddesses, so as befitting as Lind might be, I would like to avoid that one."
"I would try to make Urd happy." Mara groused then. "But, I just don't know if she could ever think of me other than a friend and rival." One of her fangs dug into her lower lip. "We're demons."
"No more demonic than the mortals she befriends." Hild murmured quietly. "We have foresight, and the ability to understand things that make us much more forgiving….kind even, I would say." In fact, as she watched the earth realm, she found herself bothered by all the petty squabbling. Even she didn't argue with the heavens as much as humans fought with each other. "Demon's feed on sinful shares, but we are no more monsters than the humans we gain nourishment and livelihood from."
"She would argue that because of our influence, we are to blame for that." Mara said, knowing that to be the case. "Lady Hild, in my time spent watching over Urd, I've noticed that she most enjoyed that little human boy…she seemed as taken with him, as Belldandy is with Keiichi."
"One day, that boy will be a man…and a man that I wouldn't begrudge Urd." Hild agreed, thinking of the brief time that creation had malfunctioned, causing Urd to regress in age for a mere few days. "However, you suit my desires of her future better. You are an immortal, and you will outlast any little human she toys with…you also share a history with her that could only be rivaled by her sisters, and that history, Mara, is what makes me think Urd could consider you a proper suitor."
"It is your will, so I wouldn't think to question it." Mara remained unconvinced, even though deep down, she hoped that was true. "I vow, I will continue my appointed task to the best of my abilities." Mara said dutifully.
"Yes..." Hild nodded. "See that you do."