"Kurogane-san…I'm worried about Fai-san. He looked… Old today."
"He's no spring chicken, princess," Kurogane returned.
"But Kurogane-san… he looked old. He's always looked so youthful, like he can't be older than his late twenties, but today he looked really old, like almost his age old. Do you think maybe it's stress?"
"And what stress would that be?"
"Er, that is, I'm not sure, but I do know he won't talk to me about it. I think he doesn't want to worry me about whatever it is, but he doesn't get it that the more he keeps quiet about his troubles, the more we worry about him when we see that he isn't okay. I … I think it has to do with something from before he came to town, and stayed here."
"I see. I'll look into it for you, princess, and see what can be done about the idiot."
"Thank you Kurogane-san. He left a little early from work today, so he might be home. Sumeragi-kun and I will be closing up soon, so if you need anything else…"
"Understood. You take care, and I'll talk to you later."
As Kurogane came home that day, he noticed a few things immediately were off. As he entered the shared apartment, he saw that all the windows were open and he could smell the scent of lit candles as though to cover something else up. He quickly moved past Fai's door to his own and dropped his things off, before he came back to check on his roommate, surprised by what he saw. Fai was nestled onto the corner of his bed, a TV tray in front of him, where a cup of ashen water sat with quite a few used cigarette butts filling it up and Fai halfway or so through another one.
Kurogane walked in, ripped the cigarette out of Fai's hand, and submerged it into the cup.
"Hey! I was using that," complained Fai.
"Yeah, I noticed… You don't smoke," countered Kurogane.
"I do when I need to; what are you, anyway, my nanny?"
"Need to, my ass…you're asthmatic."
Fai rolled his eyes, as he pulled out what was left of the box, and took out a new smoke lighting it, "Better'n needles," Fai muttered around the butt of the cigarette.
Kurogane swiped the rest of the box from Fai, stashing it in his pocket. Fai exhaled, a puff of smoke escaping, "Besides, don't recall asking for you to control my personal decisions."
"I don't remember giving a fuck if you did or didn't. Since Daidouji-san cares too, she'll have me stay home with an idiot because he's too afraid of doctors to go get the care he needs like a big boy, so of course I'll stop you from doing something that'll definitely hurt you."
"Overbearing Daddy," Fai huffed out.
"Whatever; you gonna say what gave you the bright idea to poison yourself, or are you just going to sit in here and sulk I took away your premeditated cancer in a stick?"
"Not like it'll make a difference either way; because it can't be helped that things turned out this way."
"The hell are you talking about?"
"Figure it out yourself; better yet, ask your bosses what they haven't been honest about."
"Wait- what does Daidouji-san and Ichihara-san have to do with you and why you went and got a pack of cigarettes?"
"You mean you –you really…" Fai began, only to cough violently as he did so.
"Told you so," grumbled Kurogane, making a move towards Fai's dresser, where he noticed a newly added fist-shaped crater resting inches above, only to see him grab beside him for his inhaler. Kurogane leaned up against the dresser, and crossed his arms as he watched Fai cough a few more times before taking a deep intake with his inhaler. The coughing receded, and Fai tapped the excess ashes into the cup.
"You were saying?" Kurogane asked as soon as Fai ceased having difficulties breathing, calmed by the increase of oxygen.
"Nothing important." Fai took one last drag on the cigarette before he exhaled and submerged it himself. "Cmon, I'll go work on dinner now."
Kurogane got up from the dresser as Fai pocketed his inhaler and picked up the cup. He made to leave, but Kurogane grabbed his arm instead, forcing him to stop momentarily.
"Don't bother. Take care of picking up after yourself, and meet me in the car."
"Kuro-?"
"Don't ask questions; just do it alright?"
"Oh, uhm, s-sure…alright."
Kurogane let go of Fai so he could head to his own room for a few minutes to make preparations. Fai walked into the kitchen, dumping the contents of the cup in the trash before he cleaned up the cup. He then moved around to shut most the windows he'd opened, blow out the candles he lit, and turn off the fan in his room. He was just about to grab his cell phone from his nightstand when Kurogane popped back in. "You won't need that. Just leave it."
"But…"
"It's fine; just come on."
Fai let out a breath before he walked away, leaving his phone there, and headed to Kurogane's car. Fai climbed into the passenger's seat and clicked on his seatbelt, as Kurogane sat back down in the driver's seat, and started up the engine.
"Now what?" Fai asked lightly.
Kurogane pulled out a special blindfold. "Put this on."
Fai looked at it questioningly, as he was familiar with it, and how it caused complete visual blindness, so long as it was worn properly, unable to even see a spec of light with how it covered front and peripheral view with maximum coverage. However, as familiar as he was with the blindfold itself, he didn't understand why Kurogane wanted him to wear it. Fai slowly took the blindfold out of Kurogane's hands and slipped it on. He blinked a few times, and soon, all he could see was absolute darkness.
"Good," Kurogane idly commented, getting his own seatbelt set, before he slowly drove off.
Fai lasted about five minutes before he started to get antsy and asked, "Where are we going?"
"To get you some fresh air."
"But why do I have to wear the mask?" Fai asked still confused.
"Surprises aren't surprises if you know what it is."
"So confused."
"No matter. Don't worry about it."
"That only makes me think I should worry," Fai paused, "Can I- will you let me hold your hand there then?"
"…Tche. Whatever to keep you mitigated," Kurogane responded in a low mutter, only seeming loud because of the lack of stimuli.
Fai reached out tentatively for where Kurogane should be, and Kurogane caught Fai's hand with his own, and held it loosely, allowing Fai to hold it as tight as he needed, wanted. Fai intertwined their fingers, and for a moment, a small smile flitted itself on Fai's face. Kurogane wouldn't call it bright, obnoxious, fake or cheesy, like some of Fai's other smiles. It was small and there and now.
Kurogane kept an eye on him through the rear view mirror, keeping watch of any change. After almost twenty more minutes, his expression changed, no longer smiling, like it settled on neutral before it grew to almost frown-like, as if Fai was hesitant or questioning something.
"Talk to me? Please?"
"About what?"
"Anything. Anything you want, it doesn't have to matter or make sense, just… just talk. Please?"
Kurogane thought for a moment, before he spoke, "Do you remember when we first met?"
"Yeah, you were at work, and I was a- how did you phrase it, 'a pain in the ass' mutter 'can't you have something better to do than to cause mischief for the security around here?'"
"Correct," Kurogane responded, faintly impressed that the blond had heard everything and still remembered it all. "It was late afternoon on a Sunday too. I remember that because Ichihara-san was drunk and laughing her ass off when the next day she went to review the Surveillance footage of that afternoon, all the while having me sit through her idea of commentary. It was Sunday, because that Witch only takes the time to view Surveillance tapes on Mondays and Wednesdays."
Fai cracked a half smile, half chuckle, at that, "I can only imagine what kind of commentary Yuuko-san might give."
Fai remembered the afternoon well, as it was one of his fonder misadventures amongst the walls of Piffle Corporation. He had made a complete travesty of the security guards; their only saving graces that day were that no one was seriously hurt, no mass-hysteria occurred and it was Kurogane who was the one in Surveillance that day. It didn't go public for the most part, only a minor blip in the news. The near-invisible scar on his upper face, hidden by his bangs, was his own personal reminder.
"After the next few incidents you caused, it was Ichihara-san that came to me and went around arranging so we would be roommates. Don't know why, but it might have something to do with the fact that somebody had made idle talk with the princess and the princess passed the word to Daidouji-san, so that the generalized consensus was it would be better if we were living together."
"Yuuko-san did mention once to me while she was a customer at my Café that she was concerned you don't eat properly on your own."
"She would say something like that," Kurogane muttered, before he grew quiet for a minute.
Fai waited in the silence that fell, knowing that Kurogane sometimes needed time to put his thoughts and words together, could feel a gentle beating from within Kurogane, as it reached him through their conjoined hands. Fai squeezed their hands a little.
"At first, it was a real headache, having to move in with another person, everything became topsy-turvy for a while, but then things slowly settled into almost routine, even amidst the chaos and drama, like Thursday with the kids or the princess calling if she noticed something was up with you, steady meals and grocery pickup, and even having something different happening on Saturdays. Being able to count on something being a way was …nice, even as annoying as certain people can be from time to time. "
I don't think he means just me, but I'm sure he does mean me too, when he says certain people, Fai mused to himself, more thoughts crossing his mind, and one that had returned, one that bothered him a lot to not know the answer. And as much as it scared him to know the truth, he had to know.
"Kuro…"
"What?"
"If, if Yuuko-san or Tomoyo-san told you to shoot me, to kill me, would you?"
"I-what!?" Kurogane asked startled, the shock of such a question having him hit down on the breaks a little harder than necessary, pulling the vehicle into a sudden temporary stop. Fai winced a bit as the car pulled to a halt, until the seatbelt was no longer too tight.
"Seriously, Fluorite, where is this all coming from?"
"Answer the question. If a time came when they asked, told you they wanted you to shoot me dead … would you?"
"I…" Kurogane wanted to insist that there was nothing an idiot like Fai could do to get them to say something like that, but the way he could sense Fai's need for an answer, he thought in silence about what to say, "If they ordered me to shoot you, I'd shoot," Kurogane began, and he felt the slight alteration in Fai's heartbeat as Fai shivered lightly. He squeezed his hand himself, "I'd shoot, but I wouldn't kill you."
Fai turned his head in Kurogane's general direction, his ears perked attentively, "Why? Why not?"
At that, Kurogane smirked. Even if Fai couldn't see it, he could probably hear it in his voice, "After all the crap I've had to go through because of you, and making the lil princess worry over probably nothing, killing you would be too easy. It'd be much crueler to make you live."
Fai's breath hitched, and he was unsure what to say in regard to that. Using the pause, Kurogane elaborated.
"Besides, I don't think any of you would do anything that would warrant such action. Daidouji-san cares about the princess, and if you got hurt, that would make her upset, and Daidouji-san cares too much to want to hurt her on purpose. And Ichihara-san…bet she'd miss one of her drinking buddies if you died –I mean, there aren't that many around here that can keep up with her level of drinking. And you, even if you got some dark shadow following you from your past, or some secret agenda, you're too kind. If you were going to do something that needed you to be taken out, you would have already done it before you got too attached to the people around you."
Fai's chest heaved, his shoulders shook for a moment, as he let out a quiet brittle laugh. "I should have known you of all people would answer like that."
Fai slowly reached out with his other hand, gently touching Kurogane's hand, and just feeling his skin for a moment, "If…and if I wanted you to kill me, would you do that for me?"
"And what would make you want me to kill you?"
Fai held his tongue for a minute as he thought of what he could say, licking his lips before he spoke with absolute solemnity. "There is a chance I may be coerced to make a decision I never want to decide between, and I'd rather die without having to betray my heart than to exist and be completely dead on the inside."
As they were stopped, Kurogane reached out with his one hand, and slowly touched Fai's cheek, "If such a time arrives," Kurogane began, gently brushing some blond hair to the side, "ask me then." Kurogane then lightly kissed Fai on the forehead, just above the blindfold, "Now… we're almost there, so if you can hang out for a little longer…"
Fai nodded slowly, "…thank you Kuro-tan."
Kurogane smiled a little, before he slowly eased the car back to speed, and he finished driving to the destination. After a couple more minutes, he parked the car.
Fai began to reach to lift off the blindfold, but Kurogane stopped him, "Ah ah ah, no peeking just yet," Kurogane said, and Fai pouted. The blindfold somewhat ruined the effect.
"How much longer?"
"Just bear with it a little longer. Once we get out…we're going to go for a little walk. When I let go of your hand, I want you count to ten out loud. When you reach ten, then you can take it off, alright?"
"Mm… alright, Kuro-tan."
"Can you get out on my side?"
"I…I think so."
It was a bit clumsy, but after a little bit of maneuvering, both men were outside of the car, and Kurogane used his free hand to shut and lock the car up, before he pocketed the keys and began to lead Fai away from the parking lot. Fai could tell it was outside, because he could feel the light heat of the setting sun on his skin and a cool breeze, and the air smelled of late autumn.
Kurogane leads him somewhere, and he can smell the trees, but can't much make out more than that. Progress is slower than normal as Fai is uncertain of the territory and lightly shuffled his feet to avoid tripping. Kurogane was courteous enough to warn him when he got too close to the curb, and then from sidewalk, the ground changed into grass, and then into a sandy recline. When they neared the destination, after a small step over, the ground changed once more, no long soft yet solid, now harder and more malleable, and Fai guessed it was wood chipping.
Once certain Fai was steady, and knowing what he had to do next, "Alright ... I'm letting go now." Kurogane said giving Fai a small heads up before he slowly pulled his hand free and took steady steps away from the other. Remembering what the other had said, he began to slowly count to ten. As he reached the final number, he reached for the blindfold once more, this time not obstructed from taking it off, and pulled it away to see.
"SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"a large group announced, popping out of the nearby bushes and behind trees.
Fai is completely startled and backs up a whole two paces, one hand going towards his hip and the other to his chest, as though to protect his heart from bursting out of his chest from the surprise. He looks at near everyone he knows best in town is there, dressed up in colorful party hats and streamers. Except for of course Kurogane who couldn't let Fai in on the surprise early while Tomoyo was now busy adding her own amount of color to her Security Guard.
"K-kuro-sneak…wh-what's going on?"
Kurogane turned his attention from his boss and her blue streamers she was trying to push onto him to Fai, who stared at him both confused and accusingly.
"I mass texted everyone in the Club into throwing you a surprise party…you'll see the texts when you get home."
Which explained telling him not to get his phone, and the blindfold, but, all the same, it was still unbelievable and he still didn't understand what was going on.
"Because we have never been able to celebrate Fai-san's birthday in all the time we have known you, this is a surprise birthday party for you," helpfully added Tomoyo Daidouji. "Now come down here, Kurogane-san, so I can dress you properly. You can't be at Fai-san's surprise party looking like that. You stick out like a pink elephant on a yellow dress."
"What kind of comparison is that?"
"I…I don't know what to say," Fai stated still flabbergasted and overwhelmed.
"Then don't and go cut your cake," Watanuki piped in.
"Wait…there's cake?"
"What birthday party would be complete without food? By the way, Kimihiro…I'm hungry."
"Get your own food!" Watanuki barked at Doumeki, as other murmuring went about, a couple that popped out from behind a bush musing about the look of shock and being worth it.
Yukito came over with a quiet shake of his head, holding out a birthday hat that was a little fancier than the others, "Here you are birthday boy. Can't be at your own party without your own special hat."
"I…but…"
Syaoron was already more than halfway over, and playfully patted Fai on the back, "Don't be shy, plenty of food and fun to go around. And rumor is there's presents later."
"I…I … thank you, just…thank you all of you," Fai said smiling, his eyes lightly wet with unshed tears.
Yukito helped Fai put his hat on, before he walked towards the major consensus of the crowd of people, only a few not specifically 'members' of their little Club. But members or no, Fai was just marveling what these people would do for a friend, so in awe that it made his heart hurt a little both in happiness, and the brittle truth of what this town held.
I'm an idiot but you
all love me anyway.
"Do you think he noticed?" Syaoron asked with an amused smirk, as he watched Fai walk around with a sign taped to his back.
"Might've; probably too distracted to care," Yuuko replied taking a swig of some blush wine as she stood next to Syaoron for the minute before calling out to Watanuki about more alcohol.
Sakura stood at the back with Subaru, "Do you think this is okay?" she asked him hesitantly.
"What concerns you, Kinomoto-chan?"
"Do you think Fai-san will be better afterwards, or will this just make things worse for him?"
"That's a hard question to answer, Kinomoto-chan. However, as it is Fai-san, I am sure this will help lift his spirits. And furthermore if Kurogane-san was able to persuade Fai-san to ease his own burden."
"I really hope so," Sakura said, still in that concerned voice of hers.
Subaru was not dull to not notice, and smiled at the waitress, "Kinomoto-chan, shall we go and give Fai-san his present from us?"
"Yes!" Sakura said smiling again, as she thought of the surprise awaiting her boss. With that thought implanted, she happily skipped off to go fetch the gift that they had wrapped, albeit a bit arbitrarily.
