This chapter is very long and sad, so caution if you don't like tears

Cried as i wrote this too (no joke) hope u enjoy it anyway!!!!!


Chapter 12: Too Much…

To Sakura days had turned into weeks, and weeks into months. She had reached her 2 month period in Suna. Something strange was happening to her, she felt like she was getting closer to Gaara, but loosing him at the same time. She was racking her brain for an answer, but did not get one. She was sad a lot, and didn't know why. It was like a piece of her was missing, and finally she snapped. Her mind had enough and she couldn't take it anymore. It all began when Gaara came in one night from working late again,

"Hi Gaara-kun" she said quietly

"Hn" was his response, and sakura cringed from it, he didn't know how much it hurt her. Gaara was in and out of the shower very fast

"How was your day…?" she asked, almost inaudible but Gaara still heard

"Hn" was his answer again, and that's when it happened. Sakura's mind caved in on her

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN HN?! IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY TO ME AFTER ALL THIS TIME?! AND WHAT IS WITH YOU AND THIS CONSTANT WORKING?! IT'S LIKE I DON'T EXIST NOW! AND WOULD IT KILL YOU TO ACTUALLY SPARE ME A GLANCE ONCE IN A WHILE, OR IF I'M LUCKY MAYBE SAY 'SAKURA' WHEN YOU TALK TO ME OR EVEN LOOK AT ME?!" Sakura had exploded and Gaara's stressful day did not make him handle it any better. He pinched the bridge of his nose and turned to her

"Yes sakura? Is there anything you need?" he asked, a hint of annoyance in his voice. The fact that he was staying calm during all of this did not help Sakura's temper either.

"WHAT I NEED IS GAARA BACK! YOU HAVE BEEN CONSUMED BY WORK LATELY AND NOW YOU HARDELY EVER PAY ATTENTION TO ME!" she started crying now as she talked, it was too much for her to handle.

"WHAT, AM I JUST LIKE AN EXTRA SIDE TO YOU'R DAY NOW?! JUST DO WHAT YOU WANT WITH ME AND NOT CARE ABOUT HOW I FEEL?!" she started crying harder now that she was letting it all out

"You are very important to me Sakura, but never say I put my work as Kazekage before you!" he was officially mad now

"THEN WHAT IS IT?! YOU'R JUST AS BAD AS UCHIHA NOW!" the words stung Gaara; she had never said that before.

"Never compare me to him" he spat at her

"WELL I MIGHT AS WELL! YOU DID THE SAME THING! USED ME AND TOSS ME ASIDE LIKE A NAPKIN! I AM A PERSON GAARA NOT A, A THING!" Gaara had reached his limit, rather than exploding he simply left in a whirl of sand. Sakura was still fuming. Then the reality of what she had done hit her, and she fell to her knees and started sobbing. She cried to herself

"No…please…don't leave me…" she said. She felt her palms hit the floor, then her face. She couldn't move, she just laid there crying. Eventually she was able to get up. She wrote a letter to Tenten and Hinata with a very unsteady hand, but she still wrote it. She began running, she ran out of her room, and out of the building. She got to the mail carrier bird station and sent the letter. She then ran as fast as she could. She kept running, not knowing where to go. She eventually got to the gates of the village and just kept running. She ran right into the dessert. She ran through everything, a sandstorm, vicious animals and bugs. Everything in her path did not matter. Sakura eventually found a cave to seek shelter in. She cloaked it with chakra so if anyone came looking for her they would not be able to find her. She collapsed in the end of the cave by the wall. She curled up into a ball and the sobs escaped again. There was no stopping them now. She hoped the letter she sent got to them soon.

In the hidden leaf village

Tenten was sitting down sunbathing when suddenly a message ninja popped up in front of her. Startled she jumped up and almost lunged at the ninja, but realized he had a scroll in his hand. She apologized when he gave her the scroll and left. She opened and read the contents. Tears leaked out of her eyes as she read it. It was from Sakura. It said she needed her and Hinata, that she could bare the pain any longer. Immediately she disappeared in a puff of smoke. She re-appeared in the village square. She began running, she ran as fast as she could searching for Hinata. She finally found her, flirting with Naruto none the less. She called at her

"HINATA!" she screamed. Hinata looked over to see Tenten running towards her. She knew immediately that something was wrong when she saw tears in her eyes. She knew it was Sakura; no one else was able to ever bring tears to her eyes except for sakura. Hinata began running towards Tenten as fast as she could, and the too met up in a hug.

"We need to go, right now. Sakura needs us more than ever!" she said through her tears. Hinata merely nodded and they both disappeared in smoke.

"What was that all about?" Naruto asked into the air. Hinata and Tenten were on over drive now; they had to get to sakura as fast as they could. Surprised they reached the half way mark in only half a day. Hinata spoke clearly to Tenten

"We need to go faster if we are to make it to her by tonight!" Tenten nodded as they both pushed all their chakra into their feet and began moving faster then they ever had. Hold on sakura, were coming. Just hold on! Tenten thought to herself.

Sakura in the cave

Sakura knew that eventually Tenten and Hinata would reach her, so she got up. She pushed all her emotion into her feet as she began running again. Sakura was running for a while, until she finally reached the beginning of the forest. She collapsed against a tree once again. She waited patiently for Hinata and Tenten to reach her, but her doubts were screaming at her in her head. What if they didn't get my letter? What if they don't come? As Sakura got lost deeper into her though, she began crying harder. She heard rustling in the trees behind her, and slowly pulled a kunai out, standing to her feet and readying herself for battle. She knew if this was not Tenten or Hinata, this would be her last fight. To Sakura's dismay it was another group of thugs. She knew she would not survive this battle. I ms so sorry Gaara-kun, she thought to herself. The thugs spotted her standing alone. Most of them smirked as they began to approach her. Suddenly she heard someone yell,

"GET AWAY FROM HER! DAI KAMAITACHI NO JUTSU!" and with that a giant whirlwind of blades came flying at the thugs, affectively killing them all. Sakura was surprised to see Temari there, with her fan open to attack, which she did. She had note sensed Temari's chakra at all following her when she left. Oh well, at least she's here, Sakura thought. Temari ran up to the shaking girl

"Sakura, why did you run away? And what happened to you?!" she was alarmed now.

"I got in a fight with Gaara…" when she said the last word she burst into tears. Right as she started crying Tenten and Hinata popped out of the trees. Temari gave them a worried look and they were right next to Sakura in a second, with their arms around her, trying to comfort her. Sakura found the most comfort in Hinata, as she wrapped her arms around said girl and cried into her shoulder. All the girls had tears rolling down their cheek seeing their friend in such distress and not knowing why.

When sakura eventually calmed down all the girls bombarded her with questions.

"What happened?"

"Are you ok?"

"Did anyone hurt you?" when that question came out Sakura yelled at Tenten for asking

"NO! I HURT SOMEONE!" when she said the words her tears leaked over again

"Sakura please tell us what happened?" Hinata begged.

"I…didn't, mean…too……it, just…happened…" she cried again into Hinata's shoulder.

"Its ok Sakura, I'm sure you didn't mean it" Hinata said

"It's my…fault……he hates…me now…" She cried

"No he doesn't!" Temari told her. Sakura's head popped up

"W-what do u mean?" she asked

"Gaara has been miserable all day, ever since your fight" she told her. Sakura didn't believe it, but she didn't say anything either.

"You just need to come back Sakura, you need to come back and relax and sort through this all. Your love with Gaara is too strong to be brought down by something as small as this." Temari was trying to reassure her.

"No" was all Sakura said.

"Sakura, you can't say th-" sakura cut her off

"No. He hates me now, and I know it. He doesn't love me either" she said as her face sunk. The girls figured they could not convince her, only time would, so they just held her close.

After saying goodbye to Tenten and Hinata, Temari brought Sakura back to the sand village. Sakura stopped dead in her tracks when they were walking, Temari was immediately right by her side when she did.

"Sakura what's wrong?" she asked, frantically.

"I can't go back" she said, with her head down.

"Why now?" she asked

"I'm not welcome anymore" she told Temari

"Yes you are, you are welcome as long as I stay there"

"No…I can't"

"Yes you can sakura, so come on" she pulled on her hand. Sakura clenched her hands into fists. She was squeezing so hard she started to bleed. Temari got annoyed that she was physically and mentally killing herself now.

"That's it Sakura" she grabbed her hands and unclenched her fists as she pulled her into her embrace and they disappeared in a puff of smoke. They re-appeared in their room, as Temari sat her down on the bed next to her. She sighed

"Sakura, this is not healthy. You need to pick yourself up and fix things. You need to confront you problems, not run from them." She told her

"It's hard" Sakura said quietly

"I know Sakura, but it's not impossible. You CAN and WILL fix things, if it's the last thing I do." She said

"Temari, I can't do it yet. I can't face him. He probably hates me know, and I can't blame him. I hate myself right now…" she whispered the last words.

"Sakura, don't say that" she said in a stern voice. Sakura did not answer, instead she cried. She did not no how to handle this. So she did the only thing she knew how to, she cried. Temari wrapped her arms around her and pulled her close. Sakura's eyes began to sting worse and worse with each tear. She had comfort in the arms around her, but she craved a different set of arms. She craved Gaara's arms. She wanted the warmth that emitted from his body, and the protectiveness that came from him. She cried harder when she remembered that. Her eyes felt like they were bleeding from crying so much. Eventually she calmed down, and Temari began to talk.

"I have to leave for a mission tonight, and I won't be back for about 3 days. If you need anything you go to Kankuro right away. Do you understand Sakura?" Sakura simply nodded through her tears.

Sakura eventually calmed down and told Temari she would be ok, Temari got her settled in her bed before she sent her goodnights, and disappeared. Sakura eventually fell into unconsciousness, whether she wanted to, or she didn't.

Sakura woke up in the middle of the night, it was only about 12 midnight when she realized that Gaara was not there with her, and the tears came back. Sakura cried into her pillow, hoping she would fall unconscious again, but to her dismay, she did not. She could not control herself anymore, she needed someone. She went to the room next to hers, Kankuro's. She knocked on the door 3 times, and he answered

"What I-" when he got a look at sakura he changed his question

"Sakura! What's wrong?!" he asked

"I-I f-feel so e-empty" she said as she wrapped her arms around Kankuro as he held her close.

"Its ok Sakura, it will get better" he reassured her. She just cried, so he pulled her into his room and set her down on his bed as he asked her

"What happened Sakura, tell me everything?" she giggled lightly as he sounded like one of her girlfriends.

"I, sort of…um…exploded" she confessed

"That bad?" he asked. She just nodded

"What did you say to him to make him so miserable?"

"I compared him to Sasuke…" she cried as she said this

"Oh…well, um, that can be fixed" he tried to reassure her, but it didn't really work.

"Its ok Kankuro, you can stop trying now." She told him

"Sorry Sakura. I'm not good at all this comforting thing, but I'm trying" he told her

"I know you are." She said this as she hugged him for comfort.

"I miss him so much Kankuro" she started crying harder

"I know Sakura, I know" he told her.

"I…don't, know…what to…do…anymore" she cried into him.

"You will work it out Sakura, don't worry, you have to"

"How…do, you…know?" she was barely able to ask through her hysterics

"Because you're love is too strong. You guys care too much for each other. You won't let a silly fight like this break you guys, you can't. You are not a weak minded person, you very strong Sakura. You will get him back, because he still loves you. And I know you still love him."

"Are you sure?" she asked him. He chuckled lightly

"Of course I'm sure Sakura" she hugged him closely

"Thank you…Kankuro"

"Anytime Sakura" he told her.

Sakura cried for a long time. She didn't know how to stop. The tears just poured out, it felt like there was no end to it. Sakura could feel her heart dieing every second she was away from Gaara, she felt like it had withered up and died in her chest. Sakura had stopped eating as well, she felt no need since there was nothing left to live for, without Gaara she was nothing in her own eyes. No one knew her pain, or at least she though. She did not know how Gaara had felt from their argument; she figured he hated her by now. Little did she know, Gaara was suffering as well. Sakura thought about running away, going back to the leaf, but her heart wouldn't let her leave. It belonged to Gaara, and she knew it. There was no way she could be somewhere that he wasn't, she just couldn't fathom it. She missed him so much, if only she knew that he missed her as well. All the hate that she had imagined he had for her, was not real. Sakura was on her own downward spiral, she was just getting worse and worse. Every minute she was away from Gaara, she would die a little more inside. Sakura was finally able to get out of Kankuro's room once she silenced her hysterics; she was barely able to make it into her room before collapsing on her bed. She crawled up into a ball in the corner of her bed, as tears poured out. Finally when Sakura was tired enough, she closed her burning eyes and gave into unconsciousness once again.

Sakura woke up in the middle of her sleep again. She could tell it was only around 1:30 in the morning. It was still dark out, so she decided to take a walk outside. Well Sakura was walking she remembered every night she came out, every tear she shed, every kiss she shared, and every hug she gave. These thoughts brought more painful tears to her eyes, but she fought them back. She was tired of being weak all the time. She knew she had to pick herself up, so she tried. She tried with all her mite and was barely able to hold back her tears

"How am I supposed to go through the day if I can't even stop crying at night?" she asked herself.

"I guess I will have to if I plan on living" she told herself

"Great job Sakura, you are officially crazy now" she chuckled at her logic, it was a sad chuckle though, there was no happiness in it. Just like her, she had no happiness left after this. She continued talking to herself

"I wonder what happened to our Gaara-kun?" she asked

He's just as miserable as us…don't worry she smiled whenher inner answered her

"I think he hates us now…"

You're probably right. I would go talk to his inner, but his inner is the Shukaku, and he hits on me, so id rather not go there…

"That's ok. I understand…"

I'm going to go sulk in the corner of our mind, so I guess ill see ya later…try not to kill yourself when I'm gone, that might not make our Gaara-kun happy…I hope…

"Ok, ill try" she stated

"I probably look crazy, standing in the middle of the night talking to myself, don't I?" she asked, but got no answer.

"That's what I though, no one cares about us anymore" her smile faded into a deep frown. Sakura was startled when she heard a voice, it was faint though

"…I care…" it was Gaara; she knew it for a fact. She spun on her heel and her eyes widened when she saw a see-through Gaara standing before her. Her eyes moved to the ground; she was seeing things, now she knew she was crazy. When the hallucination placed his hand on her face she wanted it to be real, she begged for it to be real. She started crying as she sunk to the floor again, she cried

"Please don't leave me alone again" her cries intensified as the hologram faded as it said its last words

"…I will always love you…my cherry blossom…"

Sakura was barely able to trudge herself up the stairs again, when I say barely, I mean she was barely able to lift her feet over the stairs without falling on her face. She finally reached her room at around 2 in the morning. Once again she fell onto her bed, as she curled up like usual. Sakura's tears began pouring out uncontrollably when the hallucination returned, this time to hug her close in her bed. She felt herself cringe when she realized she could not put her hands around this image, for it was not real. Everything went black around her, and she feared, this time, she would not wake up.

Sakura's sleep was short lived. For she was woken up by a sharp pain in her chest, it felt like someone thrusted a dagger into her heart. She let out a scream as she sat up in bed, her hand flew to her heart as it began to glow purple, and trying to heal any internal injuries she had. It did not work, the pain was still there, and unbearable as ever. She felt like she was dieing. Little did she realize that Gaara had heard her scream from down the hall, and cringed deeply from it. He hated hearing such pain coming from her. After sakura let out her scream, she cried. She didn't realize Kankuro had pushed himself into the room until he was right next to her

"Sakura! What is it, what's wrong?!" she was barely able to answer through her pain

"IT, IT HURTS SO MUCH!" she yelled at him.

"I know it does Sakura, but you have to be brave, you have to fight it. Keep yourself alive, for Gaara's sake!" he told her

"I-ill try!" she started crying harder as. She put both hands to her heart and they began to glow pink, pushing chakra to her aching heart. It was barely a cure, for the pain was there, all her chakra did was merely numb it.

"Kankuro it won't stop!" she told him through tears. He put his arms around her to comfort her.

"It will Sakura, be strong for Gaara!" he told her, his words made It barely enough for her to stand it, but she did, and it eventually calmed down. Yes, there was still pain, but it was not nearly as bad. Her tears still rolled down her face, but she was not crying. They were just empty tears, all there was, was sadness behind them, pure pain and sadness. When she could finally talk, Kankuro asked her

"What was that sakura?"

"It was my heart…it died…"

"Sakura, that sentence hurt me, and I'm not even in love" he told her

"Sorry" she murmured to him. He sighed

"It's ok. I just don't like seeing you in so much pain"

"Well, do you think I enjoy this?" she asked him sarcastically

"No, but it still hurts the people that love you Sakura. Just remember that." With that sentence in mind, he left. Sakura could not fall asleep now, it was close to 3 am, and she had nothing to do with herself. Sakura decided to go take a shower. She rounded up her clothes and walked into the hallway. You can only imagine her face when she saw Gaara walking down the hallway; she couldn't believe he was awake at this hour. Her eyes were frozen open, and then his eyes met hers. He saw the sheer sadness and pain in hers, and she saw the longing and abandonment in his. She quickly rushed to the bathroom without a word and closed the door. She slid down the door until she was sitting on the floor. Gaara had done the same in the hallway. Sakura was the first to get up out of the 2 of them, she turned on the shower and after letting it warm up, she stepped in. She began sobbing. The water was very hot, as it burned her skin, but she didn't care. In Sakura's eyes, she deserved far worse than this. She used the shower to muffle her cries, they were a call for help, but she would not let anyone hear them, or so she thought. Gaara was sitting on the floor next to the bathroom, he heard her pleas and cries for help, and it killed him inside.

The shower did not last long enough, when sakura got out her eyes were beet red, and it matched her skin. She trudged on her clothes as she walked out. A sudden chill hit her, as she looked to the side of the bathroom; she thought she saw a figure sitting there.

"Sakura, you are the craziest person on this earth now" she told herself with a small smile on her lips, but it was a sad smile.

Hey, we are not crazy! We are just desperate! Her inner told her

"We are both…" she said

This is sadly true, I miss our Gaara-kun! Her inner said with a frown. Sakura frowned as well

"You don't know how much I miss him too" she said as she hugged herself.

Well I sort of do, because I am you! DUHH! Her inner was very obnoxious

"Well thanks for your support then"

It's what I do best. Hey you know, if you wined up getting close enough to him, I wouldn't mind having a few words with Shukaku after all. It could help us both.

"I don't think I have the strength to go near him…" she said sadly

Ok, whatever. When you are ready you let me know, and I will do my thing!

Sakura was a little comforted by her inner cheering her on

"Thanks inner, you really do help when a person is down" she said with a small smile.

That's why I am here! CHA! BELIEVE IT BABE!

"Hmm, you sound like Naruto now"

Oh great, that's the last thing I need is to be compared to that idiot!

"Hey! That idiot is one of our best friends!" she yelled at her inner once she was in her room.

Ya well have you ever tried dealing with that fox-thing inside him! What a pain he is! No manners and all he wants to do is kill everything! HATE HIM!

"Well that is your problem, not mine" she said

Thanks for the support, and here I am, trying to help you…whatever…

"You know I didn't mean it like that" she said

Ya I know. Hey I'm kinda tired now, so I'm going to go to sleep for a little while. See ya Tomrorow!

"Ok…bye…" she said bye sadly to her inner. Once her inner left, it brought back that same feeling of abandonment back again. Sakura sat on her bed and pulled her knees up to her chest and rested her arms over them as she cried once again.

Sakura died that day, as she watched her life crumble into bits and pieces, right before her own emerald eyes.


wow, what a powerful chap huh?? well, i thought it was incredibly sad writing it :(

Hope u liked it anyway

Reviews keep me writing

Allways,

Bryan :D