Chapter Twelve

Three days passed that it seemed like everything was slowly piecing itself together and it took one moment of giving into their heart's desires what both of them wanted. Cameron manages to come back to work after a few days worth of rest and coming to an agreement to equally split her time between working in Diagnostics and in the ER. She agreed with Chase to let him cover a couple of shifts at the ER on her behalf every so often to give her an opportunity to spend more time with their son. The only way she was able to hold down both jobs was to allocate some of her time within the week to prevent her from overworking herself which she consented to. In the free time she had Cameron devoted it to Chase and their son. Two months ago she came back to Princeton with nothing to fallback on; an ailing son fighting for his life and heading down the road to dissolution. How did it become possible that her situation brought something good out of it? Why did Chase managed to stand by her after she left him; kept his son away from him for months; and nearly broke his heart when their marriage ended? The result of their situation brought upon a second lease on their newfound relationship and more than ever they were on the road to reconnecting.

They were both happier than ever enjoying each others' company and establishing the family they dreamed about with their son. Yet, they still had their doubts, each of them expression their fears of ruining their newfound bliss of happiness and the family Liam needed. The events that occurred during their year apart still plagued their minds wondering how badly it affected them individually. For Chase and Cameron all they had to fallback on was each other since it was evident to one another just how important they were in each others' lives. It was all about trying to reestablish that faith and trust that held their relationship together years ago and at the same time trying to protect each other from disaster. Granted both of them got what they wanted which was a second chance, but they wonder what was next to follow? Where do things go from there between them? It was the questions that plagued their thoughts and for their sanity and for their sake Chase hoped that somehow the hand of fate wasn't cruel to rip away the blissful feeling of happiness they had.

Cameron sat in the conference room along with Foreman and Chase reviewing the next case they received from Pediatrics when she returned to work. The three of them conveyed running through differential diagnoses on their new patient, a ten year old boy named Stefan Wright who suffered from short bowel syndrome for the last three years. Cuddy insisted that House and his team take the case as his parents are wealthy and make huge contributions every year to the Pediatrics Department for new research and medicine. A few days ago they discovered that Stefan's condition began to deteriorate at an alarming rate and listing down the initial persistent systems of abdominal pain; diarrhea; fluid retention; fatigue and weight loss they began to try to pick up from where Pediatrics left off.

"Purple file tells me that this is Cuddy's sugar money Pediatric case." House replied walking into the room. "Something about treating kids is the imagination that they have that the world is filled with butterflies and rainbows. Stick the needle in them then their nothing but whinny little brats crying for mommy and daddy. These kids think the world is all sugarcoated and filled with sunshine that their dreams get blown out of proportion."

"If it helps a kid think that the world is filled with butterflies and rainbows let them imagine that." Cameron pointed, countering House's remarks. "What I learned about working with Pediatrics at Children's Memorial Hospital is that all these kids have are hope and their belief that magic can happen. So while they're getting stuck with needles and getting cut open they need a distraction from the pain and suffering they're enduring to get treated and all they can hold onto is hope and dreams."

"That's what makes them the sick dying puppies you have that soft spot for huh?" House smirked as she glared at him. "Unfortunately thanks to you three buckling under Cuddy's request we're stuck treating the little bugger. So what do we know?"

"Ten year old suffering from short bowel syndrome with abdominal pain; diarrhea; fluid retention; fatigue and weight loss." Chase recapped reading the symptoms on the whiteboard. "Still the same information that pediatrics supplied for us. The blood work is still in range, labs came out negative for any deficiencies."

"He's on treatment with H2 blockers; loperamide; lactase supplements and this kid has been living off a parenteral nutrition diet for the last seven months." Foreman added. "We've leaning towards starting him on treatment for Crohn's disease Whipples; and Enteritis."

"Boy this kid has gone through every single surgical procedure for small bowel syndrome including an Bianchi procedure." Cameron added as they stared at her. "I heard about it at Children's Memorial Hospital from one of the Peds surgeons. One of the two procedures known that is highly controversial in surgery. I'm surprised this kid survived one round of it and it bought him another year."

"And probably the only reason why we're taking this case is because of the dollar signs in Cuddy's eyes." House smirked looking at his team. "Our patient's parents are wealthy investors who donate a giant slump slum of cash to Pediatrics and by treating this kid we guarantee the hospital a giant tax write off for donations."

"Or maybe they're looking to us as doctors to help their son out how's that?" Cameron snapped suddenly. "Most parents don't want to bare the fact of watching their children die does that dawn upon you?"

"Look going through his records his track sheet on small bowel surgery has been a mess and we can't afford to put him on the table again." Chase said, trying to sound civilized. "If we start treatment it will buy him more time."

"Start the kid on treatment for Crohn and Whipples." House ordered. "We're expected by Cuddy to make sure this kid still has his small intestines in tact and keep the little bugger's dreams alive without taking a trip to OR land." As the three of them got up from the table to administer treatment, Cameron was following Chase out of the room when she was stopped by House's voice. "Dr. Cameron, may I have a word?"

"What seems to be on your mind?" Cameron glared at him, irritated by his remarks during differentials. "You're not done taking jabs at me so you waited until Chase and Foreman are out of the room."

"Your record of employment was faxed the other day from Children's Memorial Hospital." House said, noticing that her expression suddenly changed. "It seemed like you had something going for you in and consider a potential candidate for a pediatric surgical fellowship until little Chase came into the picture. It seems like you just had more than outstanding hospital bills from your previous employers to deal with but charts in regards to your progress in your Peds fellowship and noticeably your file had an attached deposition notice. Something tells me that your motherly duties to your ailing baby wasn't the only reason why you suddenly got released from your job. There's another half of that story you're not telling, and I'm guessing that you don't want Chase to know about it."

"What is it to you what was in my file?" Cameron questioned, with uncertainty. "Look what happened with my previous position at Children's Memorial shouldn't be any of your concern."

"Usually I wouldn't give a crap about your credentials but the way things turned out for you last year wasn't all you expected." House said. "The problem with working with sick puppies under the age of seventeen is that emotional attachment and the need to care about them. You were under the impression that just because you were about to be a mother you could learn about handling kids, even if their not yours. Their fragile patients as you put it and load behold if anything goes wrong with them someone has to be held accountable. A deposition filed can only be served to a doctor who is being sued by the family of a patient who either mean one of two things: an infringement against patient consent or two wrongful death of a patient due to treatment administer by their attending doctor. Judging by the one in your file a pink one usually spells for a stake in your employment and joining Foreman's ranks that working here is your only option."

"Why do you suddenly care about my wellbeing? Are you worried that I made a mistake coming back working here because if I could I would go work for some other hospital but I can't. If you haven't notice I'm in a big financial hole right now and this is one slip up I can't afford Chase to find out about. It's just another one of my many notches on my debt mountain that no one shouldn't know about."

"Cuddy knows but she has a soft spot for you because of your situation and professionally she thinks you're still competent enough to put up with any shit thrown at them. She knows about the deposition, thought in my own better judgment should bring up the issue with you for your own sanctity. When we tried to contact your former employer at Children's Memorial, your attending resident wonder if you were still in the right frame of mind to handle working pediatric cases. It puzzled me to wonder what was the real reason you were let go and what in the world would make your former resident question your ability to continue pediatrics?"

"If you had a kid that you spent months wondering if they were going to live to see another day there's that question what comes first? Is it your child's needs or the patient? It was a lesson I learned the hard way House and I may live to regret it but I knew at the time my priorities were in line back then. We spend many hours a week trying to save lives but sometimes the line between our professional and personal lives collide something has to give. For every decision I made in both my professional and personal life at the end of the day it comes down to what made me do it? What was my motivation? You wanted to know where my head is and all I'll tell you is it's right here, doing my job and going home."

"It gives me an idea of where your position stands." House said nodding in approval. "Suddenly you've just become a more complex interesting person that you weren't before. One way or another since your employers disclosed the information about that deposition from us, you rather think it's best carrying the thought of it inside of you. I put you on a Pediatric case because well you're part of the team you need to get to paid. However I question whether or not that will end up being a cloud looming over your head. If your mind is truly here then do your job; but sooner or later eventually you have to come to terms with it and talk about it to someone, let's say your baby's daddy before this eats you up inside."


Cameron needed to get herself focused and work on saving their patient Stefan Wright. She hasn't worked on a pediatrics case since her termination from Children's Memorial Hospital. What was it about pediatrics that still drew her to take an interest and an initiative to work in that department? She remembered the first time being hired at one of country's top pediatric hospitals located in Chicago thinking that she'll finally get her big break. It wasn't until when the news about her pregnancy came her priorities suddenly shifted in the span of nine months while she worked her way up her residency, well once upon a time she thought. It was only after Liam came, things started to spiral out of control for her both professionally and personally but she never regretted having her son, he was the one thing that turned out right for her that year. While everything in her life started falling apart, it was when the deposition happened it signaled the end of her career at Chicago's top pediatric hospital because of one slip up.

It was when she was helping Chase administer the treatment for Stefan Wright her mind went back to the incident that if she dwell on what happened last year it will distract her from her task at hand right now. Literally, she was outraged that House brought up the subject about the deposition and questioning her sanctity and ability to work their pediatric case. However, Cameron knew it did impact she was just afraid of dealing with it and instead she paid for it with her job and damaging her medical creditability for future employment. Her short run at Children's Memorial served as one of the notches of her failed attempt at a new life away from Princeton and is now spending her days dwelling and living with it. Her sudden silence and her distant behavior was noted by Chase after they finished their rounds and brought their patient for a MRI he tried to reach out and attempt to get her to open up.

"Hey you okay?" Chase asked, looking at her distant expression. "You seem kind of out of it. Is something the matter?"

"Would there be a problem with me?" Cameron asked, trying to deflect the conversation to a different topic. "Did you call Marina to check up on Liam? Is he doing alright?"

"Come on that's an given statement and yes our son is healthy, eating right and sleeping properly when it's naptime don't worry." Chase said. "Can't wait till later on to see the little guy later on when Marina drops him off." He could sense that her mind was on something else and it was bothering her literally. "Babe talk to me, you seem distracted and with your experience in pediatrics cases like these should come to you easily."

"Well it used to...not anymore." Cameron sighed, focusing on the screen. "I thought pediatrics would be easy and once you become a parent treating kids should be a breeze. It's still hard separating the line between being a doctor and being a parent when you're at work. Look...I haven't been really honest with you about everything that happened last year with me. If I'm going to be with you I want to be open with you about everything and maybe I'm hoping that you won't look at me differently."

"Is that what you think?" Chase asked, applaud by the thought that she thinks he was doubting being with her. "Why do you think I'm going to look at you differently if you keep a few things from me? Sure I did that to you with the whole Dibala incident and it made you run off to Chicago for almost a year. Come one we did things that we weren't proud of and we're still here together that what should count right?"

"I wish it could but I feel like this thing I'm keeping inside of me was one of the reasons I realized in the end that my attempt at a life away from Princeton; from the hospital and from you was a utter failure." Cameron added, taking a deep breath trying to keep herself in line. "And because of it I feel and I question my ability to still do the job I love and a job I have passion for because I'm not in the right frame of mind."

Chase could tell that whatever was eating Cameron up was clearly affecting her state of mind to focus on treating their patient. The given hostile remarks from House in regards to pediatric cases got the best of Cameron and by her tone she was clearly offended by them. How could she tell him about the real reason she lost her job and how it ended up affecting her medical performance. In the years she worked with Chase when it came to working on cases that involved them treating children it amazed Cameron how he was around them. That was her inspiration to work in the pediatrics in Chicago because of Chase, she wanted to feel that experience and develop that skill that he had when treating children.

"You know when I heard you actually took a job with one of the top pediatric hospitals in the US it surprised me." Chase said as they continued running tests. "I never imagined you of all people working with kids and knowing your whole stigma on getting emotionally attached to patients kids are the likely you'll be prone to have that soft spot for. Look whatever happened in Chicago it shouldn't effect your performance working on these cases with the training you got. Come Allison you already have enough experience with kids and on top of that you're a mother so it should help you do your job when dealing with kids."

"When it comes to treating pediatric patients it seems like you were more better at it than I was because you relate to them." Cameron replied looking at him. "The way you dealt with them was what inspired me to find a way to do my job when I was working in Chicago. You and then expecting your child Robert was what motivated me. I guess when Liam came I had to find a way to separate my professional feelings from my personal life and then the line between the two started becoming blurry. When I finally worked to get my opportunity to prove myself it took one slip up to make everything fall apart in my medical career at Children's Memorial."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Chase asked, hoping to regain her trust in confiding in him. "I'm here to listen if you want."

Once they finished the MRI on Stefan they wheeled him back to his room in Pediatric ICU to give him time to rest. After giving the scans to Foreman to examine and let him takeover for the next round of tests and treatment Chase and Cameron headed to the cafeteria once lunchtime came. If Chase was going to try to reestablish a sense of trust and convince her he could be her confidant there had to be some sort of trade agreement to get her to open up.

"I know you're here to listen and you'll lend an ear I just feel...like I don't want things to be awkward between us." Cameron protested with doubt in her voice.

"How about I tell you something I was afraid to reveal to you about what happened in the last year to me I didn't disclose to you?" Chase offered getting the best of her curiosity. "You're holding in something that's eating you inside and its effecting you both emotionally and mentally. If I tell you this then maybe...I can prove to you that you'll always have someone as a confidant to confide in. Will you listen to my story first?"

"You have my attention." Cameron replied placing her hand on top of his. "I'll listen first if that's what you want."


She sat in the booth across from him as Chase glanced around the room and spotted Jenny buying her lunch before taking a seat at a table on the other side of the room with some of her colleagues from radiology. Cameron noticed who Chase was staring at before turning his attention back to her and taking a deep breath. "You know Dr. Jenny McKessie from radiology?" Cameron nodded her head to reply to his question. "Before you came back...I was involved with her for a few months. Foreman was the one that hooked us up thinking that I should try reentering the dating scene again."

"I know and I understand why since I wasn't around it's alright." Cameron said, not sure why he mentioned about possible women he dated during their separation.

"If you thought the stuff with the nurses during last Christmas was a kicker for a need of an idiotic adrenaline rush...Jenny was like my highest one of them all. She wasn't what anyone expected and I learned just what she was like outside of the hospital and she ended up being my next adrenaline rush I needed to numb my pain and agony in life." Chase kept his focus on Cameron hoping to try to get her to understand. "Jenny...is one of those people who has issues, but something about her I can't explain why I got involved with the likes of her."

"What was it like with her?" Cameron asked, timidly. "Did you have feelings for her?"

"That's the thing I don't know what was the deal with us, romantically and emotionally I don't know what I felt for Jenny." Chase continued trying to make sense. "To me...she was someone I turned to when I needed another adrenaline rush in my life and the stuff I saw first hand with her, experienced helped ease my pain, anguish, and hurt that I needed something to distract me. I really didn't connect with her but I wanted to look out for her and make sure she stayed out of trouble. House and Foreman warned me about trending the line between common sense and stupidity but it didn't matter to me. I became addicted to the adrenaline of doing something stupid that maybe if I kept going somehow I get pulled back from the edge. I wanted to see the low point first hand and with Jenny she was the prime example...someone in need of a deadly fix."

"Are you saying...were you involved with an addict?" Cameron said, surprised by his revelation. "Jenny, is she an addict?"

"She is...no one doesn't know except a few of us and lives with it because it is what she is." Chase replied. "I found out about the heroin addiction; worse part was I helped press on her addiction though it should be in my power to stop her. On some days I drive her to meet up with some of her contacts to score some smack; she deals on the side too for some extra income and I just watch from the sidelines her shooting up; wheeling and dealing. I knew in my right frame of my mind I should have not gotten involved with her but being with her I didn't have to feel anything for her. As long as she gave me what I tried seeking, another adrenaline rush I was satisfied and then it will be difficult to find the line again. There were some nights where things got dangerous, out of control, and sometimes wanted to experience life on the edge."

"So you went out with a drug addict for months; helped her score some smack; watch her shoot up; watch her wheeling and dealing and with your history with addicts you still managed to keep at least some part of your moral compass in tact in a situation like this." Cameron placed her hand on top of his and carefully rolled up the sleeve of his shirt. She didn't know why she did that but wanted to her mind wanted to make sure and then rolled his sleeve back down. "I'm trying to understand this though this is out of character for you and I feel that if I judged you about your choices and actions then what kind of person would I be? I shouldn't judge because heck I didn't make any good decisions or choices back last year and look at where I am right now. There must have been some part of you that felt something inside all those months you were with her and if you managed to put up with all the stuff she did what was your reason?"

"I can't explain it...because I still don't understand why I still dated her and heck she really didn't know what this thing between us was." It was the honest truth and still even after as they glanced at Jenny across the room something about her always baffled him. He was trying to find a sense of understanding for his actions; while at the same time trying to reestablish a sort of trust foundation with Cameron again. "We've been around addicts, meet them and come to understand them look at House for example. Most of them don't care much except for their need of getting the next deadly fix to fuel their addiction. Jenny...she's not like most addicts whether she is high or not. She knew that I could never feel anything for her emotionally because even if I distract myself by trying to make something work at a futile attempt at a new relationship. How do I put it in a simple way...even in an addict like her apart of her still has a conscious that still was in tact, the need to protect those from herself and her addiction."

"A conscious?" Cameron asked as he continued on with his story. "You think you didn't feel anything for her but you may have contradicted yourself that even if you didn't emotionally feel anything for her compassionately you still were capable of looking out for others. She has a conscious and knowing the situation she's in didn't want anyone to end up like her. Inside like most addicts Jenny is struggling and she feels that she can't bare the thought of someone to go what she's going through seeing the low point. Maybe being with her served as a purpose for your benefit which is only yours to understand and figure out. Things happen for a reason like you talking to me about her there had to be a reason for it right Robert?"

"She needed to get me away from a place I wanted so much to experience, another emotional addiction I tried to get out of her...an adrenaline rush. Jenny was the one that gave me a pardon out of our little thing going on or whatever it was. The funny thing is that she knew I still love you and that it was something I couldn't get rid of with an adrenaline rush. It was when Liam and you came back into the picture she figured that somehow I needed to get my life back in sync and focus on what was important in life. She told me something about not letting good guys fall from grace, dragging her down to her level and something about us...that our story has not been fully written yet. A drug addict with a conscious wanted me to have my salvation, my absolution back and steered me towards what my heart truly needs."

"It seems like you owe her...proves that there is still a sense of goodness left." Cameron slightly smiled at the thought. Sometimes it takes the strangest events and people to make them realize what they need in life and still baffled, but yet trying to come to terms with the whole Chase and Jenny thing, she learned what an impact this woman had on him in her absence. "Thank you for telling me. It gives me a better understanding of what you went through. I should...owe you for that."

"You had a right to know and I hope...it doesn't change your opinion about me." As he tried to continue with their conversation they were interrupted by the sounds of their pagers going off. After their moment of reestablishing the foundations of truth and honesty in their relationship it was time for them to focus on the task at hand. Chase was the first to pull out his pager reading the page and pulling Cameron back on focus on the job. "It's Foreman something is wrong with our patient. Listen I need you to focus you'll be fine alright. Allison you could do this...nothing bad won't happen."

Cameron nods, trying to pull herself together as they stood up. "Okay come on. We have a patient to tend to."

One minute she was sitting here listening to Chase revealing something that he was at first afraid to tell her about last year with Dr. Jenny McKessie and the next minute she is suddenly back focusing on her job. Her mind was rattling between the thought of the revelation of what happened at Children's Memorial coming to light and having Chase take the first step to reestablish their honesty factor in their relationship in exchange for hers. Chase made the first move, now it was up to her to reply back. In regards to this case, Cameron was just hoping that she didn't have to relive another utter upset like before. At this point with Cameron questioning her ability to do her job it was affecting her thoughts on how to tell Chase what really happened in Chicago that signaled the beginnings of her road to dissolution.