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Chapter 12: Just the Beginning

Kendall's alarm went off at 8 AM sharp, startling him out of his deep sleep. He resisted the temptation to press the snooze button and forced himself out of bed. He threw on some athletic shorts and a t-shirt before making his way downstairs for some breakfast.

He went for orange juice and a couple of granola bars. No one seemed to be awake yet; the house felt quiet. He poked his head in the door of his mom's bedroom to tell her he was leaving for lacrosse soon, but he was surprised to see that she wasn't in there. Nor was she in the bathroom, the living room, or the backyard.

Did she not come home last night? Kendall shook his head, disgusted, and tried to keep the mental images of his mother spending the night with John at bay. Gross. Kendall didn't see how his mom could have been dating someone for so long and not have told him and Katie. They were supposed to be a close family. Their mom had never hidden anything from them before. Why should she start now?

Kendall slung his equipment bag over his shoulder and grabbed his bike from the garage. He made it to the field with about fifteen minutes to spare, and took the time to stretch his sore muscles some more. His neck and back were a little stiff because he wasn't accustomed having to run with so much gear on—it was different than skating. Harder. There were a few boys already there, and soon enough Derek and Scott arrived in Derek's shiny dark green Jeep. Scott looked a little worse for wear, dragging his sandaled feet towards Kendall.

"'Sup, Knight?" Scott lay back on the grass, looking like all he needed was a pillow and would be ready for a nap.

"You alright?" Kendall asked.

"He's fine," Derek said, rolling his eyes in Scott's direction. "He's being a baby because he puked up everything in his stomach this morning." He tossed Scott's bag at him, missing his face by inches. Scott still didn't budge.

"Ah," Kendall replied. "Little too much to drink last night?"

"Don't remind me," Scott groaned, his voice muffled as he spoke into the grass. "Don't even mention drinking to me for the rest of the week."

Kendall and Derek grinned down at him.

"So how's your boy Logan doing?" Derek asked. "He was looking pretty rough last night."

"Huh?" Kendall didn't know what he was talking about. "I lost track of him after a while. I left kinda early so I get back home and get some sleep. Why? What happened?"

"He was pretty wasted when I saw him. Carlos and James practically carried him out, and they weren't exactly in the best shape either."

"I didn't know that. Everyone was still passed out when I left this morning."

"Well if they didn't wake you up or call, I'm sure everything's fine," Derek reasoned. Scott let out a soft snore from the ground.

"Is he seriously asleep?"

"Not for long." Derek uncapped his water bottle and squirted a stream of the ice-cold liquid directly onto the back of Scott's neck. "Yo, Foster! Wake your ass up!"

Scott jolted up and shoved Derek harshly. "Asshole."

"We've got practice in five, loser. Here, drink some water."

When Coach Jenkins arrived, the boys were instructed to run four laps in their gear, including sticks. After stretching, he paired everyone up randomly and had them practice tossing the ball to each other and scooping it off the ground to get a feel for everyone's level of experience. Kendall could easily tell who had played before and who hadn't. He made sure to focus, but it wasn't hard to see that he was not the best player out here. Still, he wasn't in the bottom half either, which cheered him up a bit.

They did different fundamental things for a while before moving on to actual offensive and defensive drills. Handling the stick was probably the hardest part for Kendall. In hockey, he was used to carrying his stick low to the ground. In lacrosse, he had to hold it vertically most of the time. He also needed to work on his feet. Running fast and skating fast for long periods of time was really different. But he had the physicality to make it through the rest of tryouts, so he wasn't terribly nervous when Coach posted the final cuts at the end of practice.

Sure enough, he found his name on the Varsity list, along with Derek and Scott and thirteen other boys who were all seniors and juniors, except for two especially gifted sophomores. His friends congratulated him and a few of the other boys who had made the team introduced themselves. It was a bit refreshing to hang out with other guys for once, Kendall thought. Teenage guys didn't typically know who he was, since they didn't listen to boy band music, and it was nice not to be stared and giggled at everywhere he went.

When he got back home, Kendall found the other three boys upstairs in the game room. The lights were not on and the volume to the TV was low. Carlos looked fine, but Logan looked like hell. James seemed okay, but more subdued than usual.

"What up with Logan?" was the first thing out of his mouth.

Logan was lying on his side on the couch, looking pale and exhausted, still wearing what he must have fallen asleep in the night before.

"Loges had a bit too much fun last night," Carlos said.

"Trust me, it was not fun," Logan mumbled from his spot on the couch.

Kendall plopped down on the ground in front of the couch. "Then why'd you drink so much? What happened last night?"

"I talked to Camille right before we left. She's dating her co-star now."

OOOOOOOOO

Logan was sweaty and drunk and dancing with Hannah, but he barely noticed her body pressed against his. All he could think about was his conversation with Camille. And. It. Sucked.

Maybe he deserved it, he thought miserably, thinking back to the fight they'd had that day in the park. Camille had called him out on his crap, and she was right. He tried to date Peggy when he knew Camille still had feelings for him. He was jealous when she tried to move on. He told her she had no right to be upset with him when he made out with another girl. He was a total jerk to her. No wonder she decided to move on for real.

He had a vague notion that something was off when he watched James follow Michelle out of the room… For some reason he felt he should stop James or ask him what he was doing, but he couldn't think of why. Instead, he drained the rest of whatever was in his cup and tried not to resent James. It was so easy for him. All he had to do was look at a girl and she was his. He never had to work for it.

Logan felt Kendall grab his shoulder and say something to him. The music was loud and Logan's head was foggy because of that fifth (or was it sixth?) cup. Logan just nodded at him. He had no idea what Kendall was saying, but it was easier just to act like he did. Kendall shot him a skeptical look, but Logan waved him off. A few minutes later Kendall was nowhere in sight, and James had never returned from…wherever he had gone.

Hannah had disappeared too, but Carlos was a few feet away dancing with that brown haired Hispanic girl who was in like four of his classes. Ashley? No, Amber. Wait… Anya. That was it. He made his way over to Carlos, looking bleary-eyed and off-balance.

"You good, buddy?" Carlos shouted over the music.

Logan nodded. "Come get a drink with me."

Carlos extricated himself from Anya, who took the opportunity to tie her hair up off her neck. It was crowded and hot in the living room. Logan stumbled into the kitchen with Carlos following behind. Carlos thought that maybe he should stop Logan from drinking anymore, or at least try to slow him down, but he wasn't sure how bad off Logan really was.

"Let's go outside for a bit, yeah?" Carlos said. Maybe he could at least distract Logan from the alcohol for awhile.

They went outside where there were a few people sitting around and smoking. Derek sat with Scott (who looked even more drunk than Logan), another brown-haired boy who Carlos had never seen, and the quiet girl from the last party they'd been to—Holly, the one who'd offered Kendall a cigarette. Carlos and Logan approached the group. They weren't the closest of friends with these people, but they did share a lunch table every day, so it wasn't like they were total strangers.

Holly was again holding a cigarette between two fingers, and the brown-haired guy was lighting up one too. No, wait. It wasn't a cigarette he was lighting, Carlos realized. Sure enough, the boy took a long drag and passed the joint along to Derek, who refused it. Scott however, reached for it and took a hit himself before handing it to Holly. The unmistakable smell of marijuana soon surrounded them.

"Yo, is Logan alright?" Derek asked Carlos as Holly held out the joint. Logan held it with his thumb and index finger and looked like he didn't quite know what to do with it.

"He's good," Carlos said uncertainly. Logan took a puff and held it for a moment, before letting the smoke out and suppressing the cough he wanted to let out.

Carlos refused the joint too, so the boy who he didn't know took it back. "I'm Luke," he said, holding out his hand. Carlos shook it.

"Carlos," he said, introducing himself.

"They're new this year," Derek told him.

Luke looked from Carlos to Logan and back again. "Are you guys in that band? Big Time Rush?"

Carlos grinned embarrassedly. Being recognized by guys was weirder than being recognized by girls. Girls tended to scream or giggle or blush. Guys tended to scoff and roll their eyes.

"My sister has a picture of you on her wall," he explained. "She's fifteen."

"Wait 'til she hears you got high with her favorite band," Holly smirked. "She won't know whether to be excited or jealous."

Logan finished up his drink and took another hit off the joint before standing up, stumbling a little. "Need some water," he mumbled.

Carlos went with him, and they ran into James on the way to the kitchen, looking slightly disheveled.

"Where have you been?" Carlos wanted to know.

"Around…" James answered vaguely. "What up with Loges?"

"He's wasted. We gotta get him out of here." Logan was leaning over the counter with his head resting on his forearms, looking like he could pass out at any moment.

They got him to stand and James kept a hand on his shoulder to keep him steady as they left the party. Luckily Logan was able to walk on his own—James did not want to have to carry the shorter boy out of the party. That would practically invite everyone there to take pictures and put them online. Near the front door, James caught sight of Michelle, who made eye contact with him briefly before turning and walking in the opposite direction. Carlos didn't notice the exchange, too busy making sure Logan didn't trip over his own feet.

They went in the back door, not bothering to try to climb the tree and sneak in. They'd just have to be quiet. They managed to get Logan up the stairs and briefly wondered if they should wake up Kendall.

"He's got practice early though," Carlos reminded James.

"Alright, well let's just get Logan to the bathroom," James said. "I'm beat…" he trailed off, looking longingly towards the stairs that led up to his bedroom.

"Someone's gotta stay with Logan!"

"I'll play you for it," James said with a grin. "Rock, paper, scissors."

Carlos rolled his eyes but played anyway. He lost.

Logan kneeled in front of the toilet, clutching onto it for balance. He felt horrible. A wave of nausea overtook him and he vomited into the toilet. Carlos had to look away to keep from gagging himself. Being a good friend though, he patted Logan on the back and waited for him to finish before handing him some tissue to wipe his mouth and a cup of water.

"Thanks," Logan mumbled. He stood up and swayed a little. Carlos caught him and took him to his room. He pulled out a t shirt and a pair of sweat pants for Logan to sleep in, and looked away pointedly as Logan undressed. Carlos was a good friend, but he drew the line at helping Logan strip down.

"You okay?"

Logan shook his head. "Sorry you had to take care of me." He was in his bed under the covers, with his eyes already closed.

"Are you gonna be good? Should I stay for a bit?"

"Stay. Please." Logan looked up at Carlos, who bit back a small chuckle. Logan looked like a little boy who wanted his mommy to bring him some chicken soup. Carlos swiped a pillow off Logan's bed and one of his extra blankets, and made himself a little makeshift nest on the floor. It was an interesting role reversal for Carlos. Usually Logan was the responsible one, the one making sure everyone was okay.

"I didn't mean to drink that much," Logan said after a moment. Carlos didn't say anything, sensing that Logan would finish his story without prompting. "But Camille has a boyfriend now and we really are over. But I like her." It came out as a whine. "I really like her and she gave up on me."

"That sucks, man," was all Carlos could think of.

"It does. It does suck. You know what sucks the worst? I told her I was cool with it. I told her we were still friends. But I don't wanna be friends. We're supposed to be together, you know?" Logan rambled on, some of his words slurring together. "But I deserve to be alone."

"No one deserves to be alone, Loges," Carlos said, sitting up.

"I do," Logan said sadly. "I was mean to her. Why does it have to be so hard?"

"Why does what have to be hard?"

"Being in love. Or…in like. Whatever. The point is, it shouldn't be hard. If I like her, and she likes me, then we should be together."

"Yeah, you should."

"Then why aren't we?"

"If it's meant to be, you have to give it some time, man. But if it's not, you'll find someone else."

"Promise?" Logan asked with a big yawn.

"Promise."

OOOOOOOOO

"Wait…She called to tell you that she had a boyfriend? Harsh."

"Yeah. Camille and I are officially over. So I drank my feelings like a total girl, and I feel like crap, and I'm never drinking again."


The next week at school, Michelle avoided James whenever possible. She made sure to surround herself with other people in Drama, and was practically attached to Nathan's hip during lunch periods, making sure that James could never catch her alone. But he had to talk to her. He had to know what was going on between them. He knew he wasn't crazy—she had to be feeling the same things he was.

The realization hit James harder than a body check into the glass. James Diamond—the James Diamond was falling for a girl. But he wasn't the 'falling' type! Or so he told himself. He was a serial dater! He was the pretty-boy who got any girl he wanted, and who grew bored of those girls quickly. He wasn't supposed to be the type of guy who… he couldn't say it. He would not use the "L word" to describe this feeling. But here he was, catching himself thinking about Michelle, wanting to get close to her again, remembering the feel of her body pressed against his. No…this was nothing but a good old fashioned case of teenage hormones. He would get it out of his system eventually, right?

On Thursday, before Michelle could bolt from Drama, Mrs. Franks wanted to speak with her about her monologue. James hung back and waited for her to emerge. She tried to walk past him but he was taller than her and easily kept up with her quick stride.

"You can't avoid me forever you know."

She said nothing.

"Come on. We have to talk about us."

This stopped Michelle in her tracks. "There is not an us, James. We made a mistake! I. Have. A. Boyfriend. Get it through your head."

The warning bell rang and Michelle continued her pace. She would be late to Pre Cal if she didn't hurry.

"Stop acting like this is so one-sided," James said. "I know you feel something for me too; you're not an innocent bystander."

Michelle paused. She was only a few feet from her classroom, and the door was wide open. Her teacher was standing in the doorway, tapping his foot impatiently. There were about 30 seconds until the late bell.

"Just leave me alone, James," she said before slipping through the doorway. The teacher glared at James momentarily before shutting the door.

James stood there in the empty hallway, staring after her.

When he didn't show up to lunch, Kendall texted him. Michelle pretended not to notice his absence, focusing her full attention on Nate, who didn't see anything unusual about her behavior.

James had his next period class with Logan, who'd signed him up for AP English, but he strolled into the room right as the bell rang, giving Logan no time to question him. He bolted as soon as they were dismissed, leaving his friend thoroughly mystified by his actions.

Logan gathered up his belongings and made a quick stop at his locker before heading to his Honors Physics class. Today they would be assigned lab partners, which Logan was apprehensive about. Usually people gravitated toward him, knowing his intellectual reputation. He hoped it would be different here, since it was an honors class, meaning the other kids all had to be pretty smart too. Maybe for once he wouldn't end up doing all the work.

He was somewhat relieved when he found out that his lab partner would be Anya, the girl he saw dancing with Carlos at the party before everything turned fuzzy and he could no longer remember any more details. He hadn't spoken to her very much, but she was in a few of his honors and AP classes, so he knew she would be a good partner. She was one of the few students who actually participated in class, like him.

She smiled at him as they made their way to the lab. "Lucky me," she said, nudging him playfully. "Not only is my partner a genius, but he's also a famous musician."

Logan chuckled. "I'm pretty lucky, myself. My partner won't stick me with all the work."

"Psh, don't count your chickens before they hatch, Mitchel." She grinned at him to let him know she was teasing.

When lab was over, their teacher handed out worksheets full of questions to answer, due by tomorrow. The class groaned in unison, earning themselves a stern look from Dr. Aldridge.

"You want to work on this after school?" Anya asked as they exited the class. They had their last period class together too, so they walked in stride down the hallway.

"Sure," Logan replied. "Do you want to come to my place?"

"Sounds good."

James and Hannah were already seated, waiting for them to arrive. Once the final bell rang, everyone went to their lockers and decided to meet up outside. James and Logan waited for Carlos and Kendall, who were both so disorganized that it took them forever to locate everything they would need from their lockers. Once they were all there, Logan tossed the car keys to Kendall as Anya approached them, her own car keys in hand. The fivesome went out to the parking lot, and Logan hopped into Anya's car with her so he could direct her to the mansion.

Once the other three boys figured out that Logan and Anya were working on homework, they made themselves scarce. Logan was notorious for badgering them into sitting down and doing all their work too, and none of them had any desire to read textbooks and do math problems just yet. However, Carlos, having the shortest attention span, wandered back into the room about a half hour later, claiming he was bored.

"Well, you could always st—"

"Don't say 'start your homework,'" Carlos warned. "Not yet."

Logan rolled his eyes and was about to argue some more, but his phone started buzzing. "It's my mom," he said apologetically to Anya. "I haven't talked her in a few weeks, I'll be right back." He answered it and stood up. "Hey, Mom. Ugh, don't call me Hortence!" they heard him whine as he left the room.

This left Carlos and Anya to sit in semi-awkward silence for a moment, until Anya decided to break it. "So, thanks for the dance on Friday."

Carlos grinned. "No problem. The pleasure was all mine," he said, affecting a British accent.

She laughed. "Did you guys make it home all right?"

"Yeah…" Carlos trailed off, not wanting to betray Logan's trust by revealing just how wasted he'd been. "We were good. Little hungover in the morning."

"Same here," Anya said. "Brutally hungover, actually."

Carlos caught himself just watching her as she spoke, content to just listen and watch her mannerisms. She was cute, with the way she spoke with her hands, and played with a certain section of her hair over and over again.

When Logan came back in the room, he stopped in his tracks, noticing the interaction between his two friends. Carlos was leaning forward slightly, looking engrossed in their conversation, and Anya had a sweet smile on her face and slight blush to her cheeks. He cleared his throat loudly, causing both of them to jump.

"Sorry for the interruption," he said, glancing back and forth between them.

"No problem," Anya replied. "We were just getting…reacquainted."

"Yeah. I'll let you guys work on your Physics," Carlos said, standing to leave. He did not miss the deliberate smirk on Logan's face nor the suggestive way he waggled his eyebrows at Carlos.


When Logan was on his way to lunch the next day, he was stopped just before entering the café by Hannah.

"Hey, you have a minute?"

"Um, sure. What's up?"

"Don't be weirded out by this, but do you think Carlos might have a thing for Anya?"

The question caught Logan off guard. "Oh. Uh… I don't know. Why?"

Hannah smiled wryly. "She would kill me if she knew I was doing this. But she's too shy for her own good. We talked last night and she wouldn't shut up about him, since they hung out at the party and at your house yesterday."

"Really? She likes him?" Logan smiled too. This was excellent news for his friend. Carlos never got the girl; he was probably the unluckiest guy ever when it came to relationships.

"Yeah, I think she really does. But I know she won't make a move, so I wanted to see what you knew about it."

"Carlos isn't exactly the smoothest person," Logan said, thinking aloud. "But it's not like he's never asked girls out or been on dates before. He seemed like he was enjoying it when they were talking yesterday. I'm sure with the proper… set-up, he'd ask her out."

"Awesome, that's exactly what I wanted to hear," Hannah answered. "I'm thinking a set-up is exactly what this situation calls for. What if we all went on a little… group outing/double date thing tonight?"

"A double date," Logan repeated. "You mean… you and me, and Carlos and Anya?"

"Yeah. We could just go as friends if you don't want to call it a date…"

"No, that's not it," Logan said quickly. "It could be a date," he grinned in spite of himself.

"Cool," Hannah said happily. "How do you feel about the four of us going for sushi maybe? And then we can go back and hang out at my place."

"That sounds fun."

"Okay. So… we'll meet you and Carlos at Kona at 7:30."

"Alright. Operation: Matchmaker is a go."

Logan had been feeling so down about Camille lately that maybe going on a date was exactly what he needed. Hannah was pretty, she was fun, and she was just as cool as Camille. And she was a good kisser. This would be a good thing. And if it turned out that they didn't have feelings for each other, they could always play it off as a pretend date that they'd come up with in order to get Carlos and Anya together. This was a win-win situation.


After school that day, James headed to the theater for the play auditions. Girls were reading first, so he had no chance to get Michelle alone and talk to her. But he probably should have been focusing on his part anyway. He would, of course, be reading for Romeo. He put in some headphones to drown out the sounds of other boys rehearsing their monologues. James didn't bother. He knew his monologue like the back of his hand. He probably knew it better than the back of his hand.

It was a long, long afternoon. There were a ton of people auditioning, and the monologues had to be performed in front of not only Mrs. Franks, who was directing, but also the entire group of kids auditioning. Scary. Michelle was beautiful up on stage reading for the part of Juliet. She nailed the emotion of her scene, looking as if she were born to play this role.

Once all the girls had performed, it was the boys' turn. There were considerably fewer boys auditioning than girls, so it took a lot less time to get through them all. James did well with his monologue, but he paid attention to some of the other boys who went after him. He hadn't stumbled over any of the words or forgotten any lines, but seeing how others performed made him aware of how he could have done things differently.

Mrs. Franks announced the lists for callbacks. Auditions would be finished by tonight, so either way, James would know if he'd gotten the part within a few hours. Mrs. Franks paired up people randomly to read together, then narrowed her list again and had everyone perform one more monologue. Finally, all there was left to do was wait.

James saw Michelle sitting with a group of people, most of whom he didn't recognize. He wondered if he should go over to her, but as he was deciding, a girl across the auditorium shrieked.

"It's up! The cast list is up!"

There was a mass migration for the doors as kids jumped out of their seats and sprinted to the bulletin board. James decided to wait for the madness to die down a little bit. A few people were already huffing angrily and stomping away, or dissolving into tears at not finding their names on the list. By the time he walked up to the bulletin, he and Michelle were the last two people. She didn't notice him standing behind her.

"What's the verdict?" he asked. She jumped a little at the sound of his voice.

"I'm Juliet," she replied. "You?"

James shrugged. "Haven't looked yet."

He stepped up the piece of paper, running his finger down the column of names.

James Diamond…Mercutio

He gulped. "Mercutio." Mercutio. Romeo's cousin.

He couldn't help but notice the look of relief that etched itself onto Michelle's face. She might as well have thanked God out loud. This pained him. Why was she acting like this? One minute they were hooking up in a bedroom and the next she wouldn't give him the time of day.

"Are you really that disgusted with me?" he asked. "That you don't even want to be in a play with me?"

"I'm not disgusted with you," she said quietly. "But I shouldn't be around you. I have—"

"A boyfriend, I got it," James cut her off. "But I know I'm not making this up. There's something between us and you know it."

He waited for her to say something, anything, and when she didn't he took a step towards her. "Just look me in the eye and tell me you don't want this too. Look me in the eye and say it, and I'll leave you alone."

Michelle looked up at him. She seemed to be struggling with herself. She wanted to say the words. She wanted them to be true. But the truth was that she wanted James as much as he wanted her. When she failed to say anything, James closed the gap between them and kissed her again, not caring that they were on school property, in full view of anyone who might walk by. Not that anyone would, or did. They were safe, in their own little world.

They broke apart, panting a little, and there was no regret in Michelle's eyes as they walked to the parking lot together.


Be honest… how many of you thought James was going to play Romeo against Michelle's Juliet?

Anyway! Be sure to check out wintershine(dot)tumblr(dot)com for updates on my progress and for extra tidbits of info that didn't make it into the chapters. It's stuff that I've come up with for background information on my OC's and things like that. I'll also be posting the full list of every OC with their first and last name, brief description, and face claim.

Thanks for reading! Please review!