As always thank you for the wonderful reviews. I'll try to make this short.
wolf of infinity: I always liked the name Gabriel, I thought it was beautiful too though the person I gave the name to is anything but beautiful personality wise. Oh well.
MusicalEscape: Oh she totally uses her past as an excuse which probably will be address again in later chapters.
aridnie: I want to feel bad for Loretta, but I know her and she's so mean. Especially in chapters to come Bitch don't know when to quit.
houseofnightfan1: That's really tricky. Zach's the only one who doesn't want to tell Nikel, you'll find out more why later.
SeptemberLoveStory: My Zach shield worked! It's not bad; Gabriel isn't that bad of a person. He just comes off that way. He doesn't like Kurt though; he's just projecting his leftover feeling for Nathan onto Kurt.
To everyone else who reviewed, thank you!
Now without further ado, onto the chapter!
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee or the song 'Hey Jude' by Beatles, just OC's.
Shattered: Part 2
I had no idea that the night
Would take so damn long
Took it out, on the street
While the rain still falls
Push me back to you
"Kurt!" Zach yelled out, as he enterd the lunch room after talking to Gabriel, "We grabbed you a plate already, come on you're really freaking late!"
"Sorry," He told the blonde sitting down, who was surprisingly not sitting next to Nikel. Apparently the two aren't going quite back to normal though depressed Zach seemed to have disappeared, "I got held up by Gabriel on the way here."
Nikel's eyes narrowed, "He didn't offend you did he?"
"No…he apologized to me actually and invited me out to coffee tonight to make it up to me."
The three boys stared at Kurt like he was insane. Blaine found his voice first, "You didn't say yes did you?"
"Actually I did. I think Gabriel deserves a chance to explain himself."
"Kurt, Gabriel's bad news…" Zach began tapping his fingers rapidly on the table.
"You admitted you use to hang out with him when he was dating Nathan."
"That was mostly for Nathan's sake. But you're right; we did hang out with him which is why you should believe us when we say Gabriel is bad news."
"It's just coffee guys, nothing else. You're making it sound like a date."
Nikel and Zach exchanged looks thinking back to what they heard in the hallway all those days ago. They had decided they weren't going to say anything, now they were kind of wishing they had, at least, told Blaine. Well, can't dwell on the past now. Seems Kurt was adamant on going on this coffee date.
"Well, have fun I guess. How are you getting there?" Nikel finally asked.
"Gabriel will drive." He didn't want to ask one of them to drive him then come back and get him later.
"Be very careful, Kurt."
Kurt rolled his eyes but didn't say anything. They were treating him like he was five. The group went back to eating though a little more tense than earlier.
An hour passed much quicker than Kurt would've liked and soon he found himself at the front entrance, Gabriel already there waiting for him.
"Do you have a ride?"
"I'm going with you, I suppose. I didn't want to bother one of the other boys."
Gabriel said nothing to that, just led Kurt out the door and towards his car. The whole drive was awkward, they spoke very little and nothing further than 'how's the weather' sort of comments. Soon they were at a table at the same coffee shop Kurt had been at last week with the boys. Each had a coffee in front of them.
"Why did you invite me here?" Kurt asked after a few minutes of silence.
"I told you to apologize-"
"That can't be the only reason. Because, honestly, why now? You all of a sudden decided to apologize now."
Gabriel wrapped his hand around his coffee and looked past Kurt, thinking, "You shocked me how you brought up Nathans…death, so casually like that. Nobody ever says anything to me about him anymore. Well nobody besides Jamie at least. He yelled at me too. Nathan, I mean, when I first met him. I said something to him; I don't remember what anymore, something about him being there on scholarship. He turned to me and let me have it. He wasn't afraid of me like everyone else. My father is a big contributor to Dalton, an alumni himself you see. He surprised me. Much like you did in fact."
"So you started dating him because he stood up to you?"
Gabriel laughed at his skeptical tone, "No, it just forced me to notice him. He forced me to live beyond my shallow life, to be better than myself. He was with me when I came out to my parents."
Kurt sat up in his chair straighter, "Really?"
"Yes I was quite nervous. I was only fourteen, a freshman. Were your parents accepting of you?"
"My mother died when I was young, but according to my dad they knew since I was three. My dad just shrugged when I told him, if I was gay, I was gay nothing he could do about it. He's very supportive, if not a little uncomfortable sometimes. He found my tiara collection awhile back and took my car from me. I think he panicked."
Gabriel laughed, "Tiara collection, hm?"
Kurt blushed a bit, "Shut up. What about your parents?"
"I live with Jamie actually. My parents refuse to allow me back at their house until I change my ways so to speak. You know, become straight. They still support me financially; they just don't want to see me. Jamie took me in; he truly is my best friend."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be. I don't want to see them either. If they can't accept their own child…I'd rather not admit they're my parents. Jamie's parents aren't much better, though. While they took me in even though I'm gay, Jamie's older brother was kicked out for getting a girl pregnant out of wedlock. They have no contact with them. Nikel does, though, that's one of the reasons he and Jamie don't get along."
"That's why?"
"One of the reasons at least. Those two have more problems than anybody wants to get involved with trust me. Nicholas and James are two people you're better off not coming between."
"Who?"
"Jamie and Nikel."
Kurt looked at Gabriel confused, "Wait, Nikel's real name is Nicholas?"
"You didn't know?" Gabriel sounded amused, "Nobody calls him that though, except Jamie. Even the teachers know better than to call him Nicholas. He just flat out refuses to answer it."
"Why Nikel then?"
Gabriel shrugged, "Something about it being as unique as he is. Even his parents call him Nikel. I don't know where the name came from so don't ask. You think Zach's insane, you should've met Nikel his freshman year here. Those two were terrors."
Kurt smirked at the thought, "I can't picture it. So why doesn't Nikel and Zach like you? I mean you do come off as less than charming but is it just because of Jamie?"
Nikel, Zach and Blaine always seemed to close up and refused to talk about Gabriel. He was hoping the boy himself might shed some light on the situation.
Gabriel sighed, swirling his coffee cup, "I'm sure it doesn't help I'm friends with Nikel's mortal enemy." He mused, "I told you how I treated Nathan when I first met him. Well he was already friends with those two idiots and they were protective of him. After we started dating they eased up for a bit…but I was young, Kurt, please understand that. Nathan was my first boyfriend and I lost my family by coming out for him. I don't think I was ready and I grew bitter towards Nathan for making me.
"We dated for years and towards the end of it, I started to make comments that in his fragile mental state probably were inappropriate. Nikel and Zach…and Sammy, for that matter, are convinced that my treatment was the finally straw for Nathan. I don't know what was in that note he wrote for Sammy but I can't disagree with them. I was no better than those homophobes that sent him those emails and threatening messages. I'm not proud of my past, but I can't change it. I just wish I could tell him I didn't mean it, that I did love him."
"What-nevermind not my business."
Gabriel smiled sadly, "He was depressed, he asked me if he made a difference in my life. The little brat I was, having just gotten in a fight with my parents again, I replied well I still would be talking to my parents, living at home, if it wasn't for him. Like I said I'm not proud of myself."
Gabriel looked at Kurt shocked when he put his hand on Gabriel's lower arm, "It's not your fault. How were you supposed to know?"
"Thanks." He glanced at his phone, "We should probably get back to Dalton; curfew is coming up. Sorry this turned into a sob story, it wasn't my intention."
"Don't worry about it."
They went their separate ways once they reached Dalton; Kurt to Warwick and Gabriel to Maxstoke. He barely walked into Warwick before he was approached by Blaine who must've been waiting for him on one of the couches.
"How was coffee?"
Kurt couldn't place the tone Blaine used so he shrugged, "Okay. I didn't know Nikel's real name is Nicholas."
Blaine laughed, relaxing, "Shh don't let him hear you utter that, he'll go into another speech how that is not his name, blah, blah, blah. Trust me, it's really boring."
"I'll believe you." They headed up to the rooms together.
"So what else did you guys talk about?" There was that tone again. It almost sounded like jealousy but that couldn't be it.
"Nathan."
Blaine stopped, "Really?"
"Why do you sound so surprised?"
"Gabriel doesn't talk about Nathan. I haven't heard him say a thing about what happened since I've been here."
"I don't know what the tell you." They reached Blaine's room, "I'll see you tomorrow. You're still coming to Finn's game?"
"You still want me to?" He sounded surprised.
"Of course…if you still want to that is…" Kurt bit his lip.
Blaine reached out and touched Kurt's hand, "Yeah, I still want to come. See you tomorrow, Kurt."
Kurt blushed, missing the feeling of Blaine's hand immediately, before he went into his own room. He opened the door to see Zach punching a pillow, his hands shaking every time he drew them back to smack the furniture again.
"What happened?" His thoughts of Blaine completely forgotten.
Zach sighed, throwing himself down onto the bed as if suddenly out of energy, "Nothing, don't worry about it. Ugh, just uh stupid straight, oblivious Nikel and stupid bitchy, pretty Loretta. Did Blaine find you?"
The blush was back, "Yeah, he was waiting for me in the common's room."
If Zach noticed his blush he didn't say anything, "Awesome. Well I'm going to bed and hoping this past week was all a nightmare. Good night Kurt."
Kurt stayed up for a long time after Zach went to sleep, who was moving around a lot in his sleep but was surprisingly not talking for once. That left Kurt to his own thoughts. He was nervous about tomorrow. He wasn't ready, how could he be? Maybe he should just bag it, but Blaine looked so excited to be going with him. Damn, he really liked Blaine; he didn't want to have another panic attack in front of him. Damn…he liked Blaine.
School went by much too fast the next day. It seemed like Kurt barely woke up -to Zach coming out of the bathroom, grumbling, which was surprising he woke up before him- and the day was already over. He had to go to the Warbler Hall for an audition but didn't want the boys to know. Just in case he didn't get in. Now all he had to do was ditch them…which was proving to be easier said than done.
"Don't you want us around? Don't you love us?" Zach whined as soon as Kurt asked if they were going to play a video game. Despite his usual hyper personality Zach looked tired and Kurt had to wonder if the fight with Nikel took more out of him than he originally thought.
"I'm going to the library, Zach; I just didn't think you wanted to go there." Kurt tried before muttered, "Oh were allowed in there."
"Hey! I was kicked out last year not this year." Zach replied, leaning against the nearby wall. He started looking around, obviously losing interest in the conversation.
"I hope you're joking."
"He's not." Nikel replied with a roll of his eyes. He noticed Kurt was acting funny, kind of nervous. He didn't know why but it wasn't his business anyways, "Come on Blaine; let's get you ready to meet Kurt's family. Zach, you're coming too, you're not allowed in the library without supervision."
"Why would we go to the library?" Nikel looked at Zach before shaking his head, pulling him away. Zach had such a weird sense of humor sometimes.
He mouthed a 'thank you' to Nikel as he dragged the boys away, Zach stumbling along. With them out of sight he went to his audition. Each step made him more and more nervous. Finally he was standing in front of Wes, David and Thad, the last who was giving him a hard stare. Oh yeah, Thad was friends with Christof who didn't like him. This was awkward.
"Kurt, we're glad you came. Since you were in New Directions we assume you can sing but we'd still like for you to audition." Wes started, trying to sound professional.
"I'm sure you'll do fine." David interjected, smiling.
"Right. What number will you be performing?"
"Don't Cry for Me Argentina from the musical Evita."
The boys look intrigued, "Proceed."
Kurt closed his eyes, opened his mouth and sang. He kept his eyes closed the whole time, not wanting to see their faces. He could feel his eyes filling with tears but he willed them away. Much like his memories.
'Maybe you should sing a song about it. You parade around singing; you make me sick, acting better than us.'
They won't take this away from him. He finished and slowly opened his eyes to see the council staring at him in shock.
"Wow, Kurt that was amazing. A true countertenor, just think of the possibilities, David."
The boys looked at one another all nodding, Wes turned to Kurt with a grin, "Welcome to the Warblers, Kurt. We expect great things from you."
"Thank you, so much."
He felt like he was floating on a cloud as he ran down the hallway to his dorm to get ready to leave. It felt so good to sing once more. Feeling good for once, Kurt threw on some skinny jeans and designer clothes. He topped it off with a scarf and almost felt like his old self again. After a quick glance at the mirror he headed to Blaine's room just as the three boys were exiting. It seemed Nikel wasn't lying they were going to help him get ready. Poor Blaine.
"Have fun, guys, see you tonight." Nikel yelled out walking away from them. Zach next to him.
"Not too much fun. Be safe, use protection. Remember if you-" Nikel clamped his hand over Zach's mouth.
"Lick my hand and I will end you."
Nikel must've removed his hand away because they could hear Zach's reply, "Why in the hell would I lick your hand? God only knows where it's been."
That was the last thing the two boys heard as they headed the other direction.
"You look really good, Kurt." Blaine complimented, as they reached his car.
"Thanks, you as well," It was true; Blaine was out of his uniform and looked adorable. They headed out on the long drive to Lima. Blaine had his Ipod playing, singing along. Kurt would hum or just listen, too embarrassed to sing as well.
Finally Blaine couldn't take it anymore, "Come on Kurt sing with me. Do you like the Beatles?"
When Kurt nodded, he switched to the instrumental Across the Universe version of 'Hey Jude.'
"Sing." Blaine prompted.
Very quietly Kurt began.
"Hey Jude, don't make it bad
Take a sad song and make it better
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better
He smiled slightly at Blaine before continuing.
Hey Jude, don't be afraid
You were made to go out and get her
The minute you let her under your skin
Then you begin to make it better
Blaine picked up where Kurt left off.
"Anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude refrain
Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
Well, you know that it's a fool who plays it cool
By making it a little colder
Na na na na na na na na na
"Hey Jude don't let me down
You have found her now go and get her"
Kurt interjected, "Let it out to let it in"
Both sang the next line. Blaine finishing the last by himself.
Remember to let her into your heart
Then you can start to make it better
better better better better better Whooooooooo
Both boys continued to sing together surprised how well their voices blended.
"na na na na na na na
na na na na hey Jude
na na na na na na na
na na na na hey Jude
na na na na na na na
na na na na hey Jude"
"na na na na na na na
na na na na hey Jude"
Blaine yelled out the next line laughing, "JUDE! HEY JUDE! HEY JUDE HEY JUDE HEY JUDE HEY JUDE HEY JUDE HEY!"
Before they finished the song together.
"na na na na na na na
na na na na hey Jude"
"Your voice is amazing, Kurt, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise." Blaine said seriously.
Kurt blushed, something he noticed he does a lot around Blaine. The rest of the car ride was filled with Top 40 music both boys singing along as they wanted. Kurt stiffened in his seat and stopped singing as they went down a familiar street that led to the school. Noticing this, Blaine reached out and lightly put his hand around Kurt's upper arm, offering some form of comfort.
He was practically hyperventilating by the time they reached the parking lot. They were meeting his parents in the stands. Blaine jumped out of the car and moved over to the passenger side opening the door. Kurt couldn't move. Blaine shifted so he was face to face with Kurt who was still in the car.
"Hey, it'll be alright. We're going to watch Finn play; cheer him on and New Directions when they do the half-time show. Then after the game we're going to see all your friends and I'll drive you back to Dalton when you're ready. Okay."
Kurt nodded still shaking, "Okay."
Very slowly he got out of the vehicle. He didn't want to be here anymore, it felt so wrong. Taking a deep breathe he began his walk through the front doors of the school, vaguely aware of Blaine a step behind him. When Blaine reached out to grab his hand to slow him down Kurt immediately yanked it away eyes wide. Blaine looked just as surprised, Kurt hasn't moved away from him like that in a long time.
"You can't just grab my hand like that, Blaine, not here. Do you want to die?"
"I'm sorry, I-I forgot."
If only Kurt could forget. The moved very swiftly down the hallway and out the back doors to the football field. Kurt stopped just short of the bleachers and put his hand over his heart, it hurt. His breathing picked up again and he could feel himself on the edge of a panic attack.
"Hey, it's okay. Breathe. Deep breathes, that's it, just keep breathing." Kurt watched Blaine's face while he instructed Kurt how to do something so simple, so instinctual that no longer was easy for him. Slowly he calmed down enough to speak.
"I'm a mess."
"You're perfect."
Kurt pretended he didn't hear that as he turned to go up the stairs of the bleachers, "Come on, we should find my parents."
Blaine gulped nervously as he followed behind him. He froze a few feet behind Kurt when he greeted two people he assumed were Kurt's dad and stepmom. Three girls ran up to Kurt and started talking to him wildly, Kurt looking a little uncomfortable. Swallowing his own discomfort he stepped forward to give Kurt some reassurance. Quickly all eyes turned to him.
"Oh, Blaine this is my dad, Burt, my stepmom, Carole, and some of my old glee teammates: Mercedes, Tina and you've met Rachel at Sectionals. Everyone this is Blaine, a friend from Dalton."
"Pleasure to meet you, Blaine. Your voice was amazing at Sectionals, we should sing together sometime. I think our voices would blend perfectly."
"That's the biggest compliment you'll ever get out of Rachel." Mercedes butt in, rolling her eyes at the other girl.
"Come on you two sit down." Carole ushered them to their seats. Kurt next to Burt with Blaine on his other side. The others sat down as well to watch the game. Kurt was tense at first but Mercedes discretely told him that certain people wouldn't be playing, because they refused to join in the halftime show and he relaxed a bit. He wasn't there. Even though he never told anyone what happened, for how badly he was teased every day it wasn't a far leap to figure out who probably hurt him. His friends weren't that stupid.
Burt only half paid attention to what was going on, on the field. Most of his attention was on his son. Blaine would say something and Kurt would smile. A real smile. Something he thought was taken from Kurt by those bastards, among many other things. But there he was, his boy, smiling like before. He was wearing his old clothes, speaking in his natural tone and his hair styled like it used to be. And Burt couldn't help but think it had something to do with the boy next to his son.
The girls left to get ready for the half-time show. Blaine was shocked to watch them perform. The Warblers never did anything like this. When he said as much to Kurt the boy just laughed.
"Yeah, we've done Rocky Horror, and Lady Gaga week was pretty interesting. Being freaks was fairly normal around here."
"You're not a freak, Kurt."
Kurt shrugged as if to say 'if you say so.' They were quiet for a few minutes. The half-time show just finished when Blaine shifted uncomfortable.
"So, there's a bathroom in this place right?"
Kurt rolled his eyes, "No Blaine, there's not a single bathroom in the whole school. Come on." He whispered something to his dad before grabbing Blaine and led back to the school. While Blaine was in the bathroom, Kurt leaned in against a wall in the hallway, looking around his old school. He didn't even realize he was moving until he was at the end of a hallway, looking down another dark hallway around the corner. He stared down the hallway, barely able to make it out in the pale moonlight.
Despite the almost blinding pain Kurt got up and tried to make a run for it. The instinctual need to survive kicked in and he went on autopilot. He barely made it a couple of steps before a foot shot out and tripped him.
"Kurt? Kurt! What's wrong?" He didn't even realize he was gasping for air until Blaine grabbed his shoulders forcing him to look at him. He just pointed down the long hallways. Blaine turned around to look as well, "I don't see anything. Kurt there's nothing there."
"It was there." He whispered, "I ran down that hallway trying to get away. It's where they found me."
Through his blurred vision he could see Azimio, who pressed his foot hard into Kurt's chest, right on his cracked ribs.
He sunk down against the nearest wall, not even noticing that tears were streaming down his face as Blaine crouched in front of him. He was shaking so hard he couldn't have gotten up if he wanted to.
"Shh, Kurt, it's okay, you're okay."
He tried to say something but he could only whimper as the memories assaulted him.
Kurt tried to speak, he didn't know what he would've said but it didn't matter. All that came out was trickles of blood.
Why couldn't he move? What was that noise? Oh it was him. He could hear Blaine trying to comfort him, but it hurt so badly. He could still feel it. The helplessness.
Kurt's eyes fell shut as he was dropped to the floor. He heard their footsteps fade away, some kicking him as they went. As soon as they were gone he tried to move into action. With his good arm he reached for his phone in his pocket finding it cracked and ruined. Black spots appeared in his eyesight and his ears were ringing. His hand was shaking so bad he dropped the phone and it clattered away from him. He couldn't even muster up the energy to try to grab it.
He gasped softly when he felt something warm on his cheek. Opening his eyes that he didn't even realize he closed he saw Blaine was right in front of him. He leaned forward again and kissed the tears away on the other cheek as well. Kurt could only stare at him shocked.
"Sorry." Blaine pulled away looking at the ground.
Kurt moved his hand to his cheek, gently touching the spot Blaine kissed. Not letting himself think too much he leaned forward and kissed Blaine's cheek in return. Biting his lip he pulled away to look down the hallway again, blushing furiously.
"Kurt," Blaine drew his attention back to him, "You're thinking about what happened here again aren't you?"
"I'm a mess." He said again.
Blaine stood up and reached out his hand for Kurt to take, "No you're not. You're beautiful." He helped the other boy to his feet, "I'd like to be given the chance to show you how beautiful you are every day if you'll let me."
"Blaine?"
"I'd like to go out with you, Kurt. I kind of had a better way of asking, one that didn't involve you crying, but…" He drifted off when Kurt smiled at him softly.
"I'm screwed up."
"Aren't we all?"
"I'm not good boyfriend material."
"Have you ever had a boyfriend?"
"No." Kurt replied honestly.
"Then how do you know?"
"My past-"
"I don't care Kurt. I just care about you and you're the strongest most amazing person I ever met."
"We can try." He said finally. He barked out a laugh when Blaine wrapped him up in a tight hug and lifted him off the ground a bit.
"Come on, goof let's get back before my dad sends out a search party."
"This is great; I know this little restaurant I want to take you for our first date. You know Zach's going to give us such crap for this. I hope you're ready for it. Kurt?" Blaine stopped walking and turned to look at Kurt who was a few steps behind him, frozen in place.
His body was tense and his eyes huge. Blaine followed his gaze to see a boy in a Red and Gold McKinley Letterman jacket. He was bigger, beefy with a scowl on his face. It soon turned into a smirk. Blaine, confused, turned his head slightly to look at Kurt while keeping an eye on the other boy as well. Who was this?
"Well if it isn't the little fag. I thought we showed you we don't want you here. Or do you need a reminder. I'm sure your little boyfriend could use the lesson as well."
"Karofsky." Kurt whispered before everything went black.
Yep, end of chapter again. I know you won't believe me, but I didn't try to end this chapter in a cliffhanger, it just needed to end here. The next chapter picks up the next day and has some important scenes in it.
a little preview since I only have about two pages written:
He was discharged about an hour later and somehow managed to wave off any ideas of him getting into a wheelchair, hospital policy be damned, he wasn't even injured. Soon Kurt and his dad were walking down the hallway, Burt bringing Kurt back to Dalton even though he wanted Kurt to come home to rest for the day. Kurt also fought that idea off, he needed to see Blaine. They were near the doors when Kurt saw a familiar figure out the corner of his eye.
"Zach?"
