Chibi-Kari: What have I been up to? Well going through a really hard time in my life. Work got increasingly toxic until I gave up and found a new job. That job was great, but they were overworking me with no overtime and I hated where I was living. My parents decided to fund me going back to school because they could see how unhappy I was and how it wasn't just going to change without a move. Now, I'm back in a city I love studying something I love. It had been so long since I had touched any of my fics, but then one day I was walking to school and passed by a wonderful looking abandoned hospital and I found new direction for this fic! I do feel terrible for having such a gap in time, but I just couldn't write. I do hope people are still reading this and aren't too terribly upset with me over the hiatus. I still don't own and all characters are fictional, I just put them in the real world for fun!
Alive Part 2
Chapter 5
It was week two of tutoring and Mai was certain she was going to lose her mind. Screw being a psychologist. She was going to be lucky to pass her A-levels with the amount of stress she was under. It was bad enough that one Oliver Davis was helping her study for her course in mathematics. But that simply wasn't the worst of it. Gene had taken to reading, and she used that term loosely, in a corner chair and periodically aiming snide comments towards his brother. Madoka and Luella took to chatting over tea in the small room directly to the left of the table she and her tutor were using. Their sly looks and conversations were starting to grate on her nerves. It was as if the entire room was trying to catch her attention at one point or another. It was distracting to say the least.
"So we have to solve for the slope of the line given 5x - 5y = 7. What do we do first?"
Mai groaned. Slopes…not her favorite part of algebra. Actually, her least favorite. "Use a formula?"
She could tell from the look on his face that he was trying to be as patient as possible. Her statement had certainly not impressed him. "Okay. Which one would you use to find the slope?"
Mai could feel herself on the tip of the answer. She studied so hard why she couldn't just remember this simple fact was beyond her. There were just too many numbers and letters in algebra. And formulas. Way too many formulas.
"You know she has trouble with slopes. Just walk her through it again." Mai hung her head as Gene's voice ripped through the room.
She heard the chair skid roughly on the wood floor. "I can't just walk her through this. She has to learn. I won't be there to hold her hand through the test. She knows this; she just needs to remember."
"M is the slope right? So we have to find m." Mai cut in before the boys could really start yelling at each other. She did have to learn this and half of her study time was a fight between the twins. It was more of a waste of time than a tutoring session.
She felt Noll's eyes on her. "What form does the equation have to be in to find m?"
Mai glanced back to see Gene sulking. Although she hated seeing him look like that, it did mean she was on the right track. "y = mx + b?"
"Do it then." He gestured at the piece of scrap paper in front of them.
She scratched on the paper for a few moments, listening to the bustle of the two women in the room next door. Although distracting, it was nice to have this much life in a house. She had missed that and it hurt to think of what it must have been like here without Gene. "This can't be right."
"Why?" That was the good thing about her tutor, he rarely gave away anything. He honestly wanted her to find the answers herself. It was similar to her Naru, but so different. He used to enjoy being condescending when she didn't understand something, yet he did always hear her out completely. The man sitting in front of her kept the condescending to a minimum. It was a little unsettling, but she wouldn't complain.
"Well 7/5 is a horrible fraction. That can't be right can it?" Mai rubbed her eyes roughly. She thought she was starting to understand for once.
"7/5 isn't the slope." Noll patiently supplied waiting for her to get to the answer.
"I know that. It's b, but still that doesn't seem right. The slope would be 1." That was too simple. And simple was rarely right, or at least in Mai's experience.
"The slope is one. And although you don't want to believe it 7/5 is b. Just because a fraction seems illogical doesn't mean you are doing something wrong. That's just algebra." He watched her quietly for a moment. "That's enough for the day. You're doing much better."
Mai nodded slightly as she leaned back in the chair and rubbed her face harshly. If algebra wasn't already bad enough, she hadn't gotten enough sleep in almost a week. The same dream was haunting her sleep.
She was always in a large white room, never seeing the entirety, but could hear the screams. She was rooted in the spot, cold seeping onto her bones from the surrounding air. Then she would see a man in a white coat walk in, his hands holding a metal canister that vaguely reminded her of a watering can. He would start spraying the room with something-a fine mist settling over everything, ignoring the voices and screams coming from the room. Everyone and everywhere would be covered and no one minded. Whatever was happening was normal for the room. So clinical. It was always with that thought that she found herself able to move and would turn to look at what was going on and suddenly be in a different area of what obviously was some sort of hospital.
She would be among women who were sitting quietly with cards held firmly in their hands. Some looking at the vibrant yellow walls, others looking at the ground glass adorning the window edges. It was calmer, nothing like what Mai assumed was the operating room, but something was still wrong. It was right under the surface. She could feel it thrumming. She wasn't sure why she was sitting among the women and holding her own card but she always did. She never questioned it until she awoke. As her name was called and she stood to follow the path she had seen women take before she would find herself outside a massive red building.
The brick rose ruthlessly towards the grey sky. She would be struck by the beauty of the colours and the strength that was held in the brick and then the screaming would begin. It always seemed as if the entire building was convulsing in terror as hundreds of voices climbed to a crescendo. Then she would wake up with the same two phrases ringing through her mind: Samaritan Hospital; Marylebone Road.
Last night after the dream, she had pulled herself from her warm bed and scrambled to her computer. With a few clicks of a button she found it. There in zone 1 London on Marylebone Road. It was abandoned, but she still felt like she needed to see it. To understand what it was calling her there for. TFL had given her directions from the closest underground station: Edgeware Road. She just had to get the Hammersmith and City line, exit the station to the left, and it wouldn't be a far walk up Marylebone Road. There was a public library nearby too. That was the perfect excuse to be in the area. She just had to find a way to get out unaccompanied. That was the hard part. It seemed she couldn't go anywhere with someone else or many times four other people. If Gene wanted to go, Naru would be sure to follow. If both of them were there, Luella and Madoka weren't far behind. She once went on a terrible excursion to Camden Town with everyone including Lin and Dr. Davis. She didn't even want to relive it! Embarrassment was an understatement. Although it was true that she didn't want to repeat that experience, she also had to do this alone.
"I think I'm going to go to the library." Mai let the statement hang in the air. Maybe no one would want to go with her.
"I could use a leisure reading book." Noll said quickly before glancing back at Gene. He had just gone to the library the day before. His scowling face showed that even he knew he didn't have an excuse to accompany her.
Mai blinked. She hadn't expected Noll to try to come with her on such a flimsy excuse. She couldn't remember him ever holding a book that had nothing to do with research, but now that she thought of it, she had seen him out in the garden just last week with what looked like a paperback. There was no way she could stop by the hospital with him around. He was still her Naru in that respect.
"Not today. You said you would work on Dr. Lewis' paper today." Martin seemed to materialize out of nowhere and winked at her. He was Mai's solace in the craze that was the house. He understood that she needed some time alone. She had spent so much of her life in solitude and suddenly she was surrounded all the time. It felt suffocating at times, but she would take that suffocation over the ache and loneliness she had felt before.
Mai found herself smiling at him in relief. He was everything she wished to have in a father. Strong, understanding, supportive, and kind. He balanced out the pure joy that seemed to be Luella. She walked in a room and it seemed to come alive with energy. Mai couldn't help but love the woman for it. And Gene and Oliver were…well themselves. There wasn't anything she could do to describe them.
"Why don't we let Mai have the day to study quietly in a library or maybe take a break and read a book."
"Martin, dear, Mai's still so new to London. I don't think she should just be taking off on her own." Luella seemed moments away from getting her handbag and coat.
"I think she has a mobile phone and an oyster card. She's more than capable of finding her way around or contacting one of us if she can't." Martin then turned towards Mai and she felt herself sitting up straighter. She hated lying to him. She could almost feel the disappointment she knew he would have if he knew what she was planning on doing. "Just don't go out of zone 1 and if you feel uncomfortable get yourself out of the situation. I know you've lived in a city before, but you're not from here and people will take advantage of that."
Mai nodded and picked up her math book for show. "Stay in zone 1. Got it." She needed to go now before she lost her nerve or told him what she was really going to do, but at least she could promise him that.
The ride seemed much shorter than it actually was. It was as if she had just sat on the small blue cushion before standing on the platform of Edgeware Road Station. She could feel a dread pool in her stomach as she took the few steps towards the steeps stairs. Moments later, she was through the turnstiles and was spit out onto the noisy street. Turning left she crossed the road to avoid the construction and started down the road. Coming up to the major road she turn left and started towards where she knew the hospital would be waiting, the red brick rising above her. It wasn't a long walk before the road shifted to the right and within a few more steps she saw it there, on her right, and the only thing she could think to do was run away.
TBC
