I call this one, "Updating the night before surgery as a distraction because I'm really nervous."
I'd pictured this moment a thousand times.
It was on my balcony on the roof, mostly. I'd look down at the trees and see him walking out of them. Older, taller, but still the same boy I had known.
In my mind, I'd see him coming to my window at night, finding me in the yellow garden, stealing me away from a visit to another province. I always tried to conjure an image in my mind of how he would have changed. He always kept his hair short, but his bangs were always longer. I used to tease him about the way he'd blow them out of the way when they'd fall into his eyes.
I used to marvel at the idea of him returning to me with stories of his adventures from wherever his knightship had taken him. I always loved what he told me about his training at the castle, so I was fascinated by what he would have experienced throughout all of Hyrule. I only feared him getting hurt again. I couldn't bear the thought of seeing my best friend with a gruesome scar on his arm or face, or some other evidence of the violence he had faced.
He wasn't really one for hugs, and truth be told, neither was I, but every time in my fantasies I'd see him and immediately run into his arms. I would tell him I missed him and he'd laugh and say he missed me more. He'd tell me all about where he'd been and what he'd done. He would tell me that he was done with that now, though, and that he was back, and he could come and see me every day again.
I had thought up so many variations of our reunion that they had started to blur in my mind, but…but this, this was not like anything I had imagined.
In the dim tavern, he flashes a cheeky grin, so like himself and foreign at the same time. "How are you?" he asks lightly as if he's an acquaintance I had run into a month after we met.
I just stare at him. The lantern light catches his eyes, and they seem to glint at me suddenly. Did he seriously just ask that? How am I?
His hand on my waist tightens at my silence, and what little distance is left between us seems smaller than ever. His faces clouds over slightly. My discomfort must be very apparent to him.
After a moment's more silence, he wordlessly pulls me away from the wall where we've been dancing. I let him pull me toward the door, but I glance back at the throng of people dancing to see if I can find Malon. Nothing. We leave, and I realize when the warm spring air feels cool on my cheeks how hot it was in the tavern.
The outside smells sweeter and freer. The scent of warm bodies no longer clogs my nose, and each inhale makes my thoughts feel clearer. I can hear a soft hum from the tavern and chirping crickets faintly farther away. Streetlights make our shadows long and distorted on the ground as Link continues to lead me around the back of the building.
This feels exactly like the first few times we snuck out. He pulled me along behind him just as he's doing now. The memory eases my anxiety about where I am in the present. It's just Link. I have no reason to be nervous.
It's darker outside now, but I can see his silhouette clearly. His hair is much longer and messier now, and when I saw his face inside I noticed that his bangs now swoop to the side rather than awkwardly in the middle. He got taller too, which makes me feel odd. I was so accustomed to having a sense of superiority from the inch I had on him, but he now stands easily three inches above me.
He stops and looks around. We're now behind the tavern between it and another building. It's dark except for a lantern above a closed door in the back of the structure. He pulls me by the wall again, to the right of the door so we're not blocking it. The light shines on his face and illuminates it much better than it was in the tavern. I can't believe I didn't recognize him. Seeing him now, this is clearly my Link. Even still, his face has aged, his eyebrows are more heavyset, and his mouth tilts upward at the corners with a confidence he did not have when he left me three years ago. More than just his appearance has changed, that much is obvious.
I realize that we've been standing wordlessly for a moment now. I clear my throat, trying to ease the awkwardness, but he seems perfectly comfortable. Even his posture is looser and more careless than I remember it. He's staring intently at me. He almost seems amused, but I'm not sure. I was never able to read him as well as he could read me.
Finally, he looks down and exhales a laugh. "Hello to you too, I guess." I open my mouth to respond, but he only laughs again. "Zelda, it's okay," he says, looking at me again.
I want to say hello back, to ask how he's been, to ask how living away from Castle Town has been, but instead, I say, "You look so different."
He smirks goodnaturedly. "I suppose I do, yeah. I must if you didn't even recognize me."
"I-It was dark. And I was overwhelmed. And you don't look—" My voice falters. "You're not the same."
He frowns. "You're not either." His tone is almost defensive.
"It's just a disguise."
He shakes his head and doesn't respond. "Now, will you tell me how you've been?"
How have I been? The more I think about it, the more I realize that it isn't a question I'm asked often. "I'm...okay," I answer.
"Just okay?"
"Do I need to be more than okay?"
"Well, no. I just think it's nicer to be."
I pause. What an odd thing to say. It reminds me a bit of Jaspar. "How are you?" I ask.
"Oh. Um, I'm okay too, I guess."
I mimic him. "Just okay?"
He smiles, which to my relief hasn't changed at all. "I'm good," he corrects. "I'm doing good."
"I'm glad," I murmur. I don't know where the conversation is going to go. What is there to say? I think of the night he left, the way he seemed to break as he yelled at me. The way he didn't say really goodbye. The way he left me crying on the ground alone.
I feel oddly numb to these memories. It feels like they happened to someone else. It doesn't even feel like he's really standing in front of me.
"Zelda?" I blink, coming out of my thoughts. His mouth is turned down in a frown that seems more characteristic of the boy I knew. "Are you sure you're alright?"
No. I'm really not. I haven't thought about it, and I haven't let myself feel it. Not really, at least. I left my home to get away from Quentalin and my responsibilities and my loneliness, but the weight on my chest came with me. I haven't felt any better at all.
"Yeah, I'm sure." I sigh and cross my arms around my stomach, grabbing my sides. "It's just...I never thought I'd see you again."
He's clearly thinking something, but he doesn't respond. His expression suddenly changes to panic. "Wait, why are you even here? It's not safe. What if someone bad recognizes you?"
"Relax, relax. You're the third person I've actually talked to since leaving."
"I don't care. It's not safe. You're all alone in a place you've never been, and people aren't exactly happy with the royal family right now. You could be in danger. I won't allow it."
I sneer. "You won't 'allow' it? Since when do you have any say in what I can and can't do?"
"Don't be stupid." He runs his hand through his hair agitatedly. "You know I'm right."
I tighten my grip on myself, the pressure giving me something to ground myself on. How dare he, after leaving me without even a real goodbye, suddenly appear again just to tell me what to do? I'm about to give an indignant reply when I realize the full weight of what he had said. "What do you mean by people aren't happy with the royal family?"
He brings his hand down from his hair and rubs his temples. "Monster attacks have gotten worse. What happened to us in the forest is now commonplace, and there's only so far you can take sympathy from the fact that it happened to one of the castle's own before people start to turn against you because nothing is changing."
How have I not heard anything about this? Am I really so sheltered that I have no idea about the problems in a kingdom I'll one day lead? I shake my head. "Why would I be in danger, though? I have no say in how things are run, what issues are addressed."
He takes his hand from his face and looks at me, almost surprised. "You're the goddamn princess. You're probably the most powerful bargaining tool someone could have against the castle."
I raise my eyebrows, suddenly realizing. He's right. I'm not in danger of being killed, I'm in danger of being kidnapped and used as a pawn.
"You could be in a lot of danger," he repeats.
I snap at him. "Yes, I am aware. But it isn't your job to protect me. I've been fine so far. I don't need you."
He opens his mouth to shoot something back, but closes it before making a sound. He takes a breath carefully. "Zelda," he says seriously. "I just want to help you."
"I...don't need your help. I'm going back tomorrow."
"I know you don't need it, but I want to." He pauses and adds, "I might agree that the castle isn't doing enough to help the people, but putting the princess at risk is not the way to solve it."
I sigh. "I suppose you're right. Maybe I should go back tonight instead."
"No, if you leave now, you'll get there in the middle of the morning. I know you're not supposed to be here, so you need to return in the middle of the night so there's less of a chance someone sees you. Did leave without telling anyone, or does someone know you're gone?"
I hadn't even thought about my arrival time. He always knew to consider things that would never even cross my mind. "My handmaiden. She's telling anyone who asks that I'm ill."
"Good. Now, if I can get Paldo to cover for me, we can set out by midmorning. That gives us plenty of time to get you there by night."
"'We'? You're not coming with."
"Try and stop me. It's my duty to protect the kingdom, and that includes you."
"I've been completely fine on my own. Stop, please." I stare at him intently, willing him to agree.
He reaches a hand up to run his fingers through his hair again but instead puts both hands on my shoulders. My mouth opens slightly in surprise at the feeling of it. No one touches me but Impa, and she's is always gentle and careful about it. The force of his hands feels like it's pushing me into the dirt.
"Where are you staying?" he asks, ignoring my protests.
"With Malon, she has red hair and—"
"I know Malon. Everyone knows Malon."
Somehow this doesn't surprise me. "She offered me a room at her father's ranch. Can I trust her?"
"As far as I know, yes. Her only secrets are from her father, and she only keeps them because she knows it's easier than explaining." He moves his hands, and I feel so light it's like I'm about to float away. "Go find her. Get home as soon as possible. Set out a bit past noon, and I'll meet you at the edge of the forest."
The thirteen-year-old in me wants to disagree just because he told me to do it, but I swallow her pride and nod my head. This is more important. It's not like he's going to stay in my life long enough to order me around again.
He looks lost in thought again. He's looking at me intently as if contemplating something. He shakes his head and his gaze shifts to the ground. His body language seems odd to me. It's strange. His movements seem awkward—almost jerky and smooth at the same time? I'm not sure how else to describe it.
"C'mon." He nods his head toward the direction we entered the alley. He seems normal again. Maybe it was my imagination.
This time, he doesn't pull me along behind him, but he still walks a bit ahead of me leading the way. The warmth and voices of the tavern hit me like a wave the closer we get to the door.
Moments after I step inside, a red blur suddenly fills my vision. "Thank the goddesses, I thought you had gone off on your own or had gotten taken away!" Malon eyes Link suspiciously. "And just who do you think you are, takin' my Hilda aw—"
I put my hands up soothingly. "Malon, it's ok. He's just an old friend. We went outside to talk." She raises an eyebrow skeptically. "Nothing happened," I assure her. "We just talked."
"If you're sure, girlie. I just know this par-ticular boy has a bit of a reputation proceedin' him." Her accent is more pronounced. It almost seems like a defense mechanism, but she's defending me and not herself.
Link smiles genially. Even at his friendliest, he has an air of smugness. "I knew Hilda when I lived in Castle Town a few years back. Finding her here was a total coincidence. Small world, isn't it?"
Malon squints at him for a moment longer before sighing. "Small world indeed."
Link gives me a pointed look. He gives a slight nod toward the entrance to the tavern. Right. Leaving. "Malon," I say, putting a hand on my forehead, "my head is hurting terribly. I came back inside to tell you."
"Oh darlin' no, I'm sorry!" She looks behind her almost longingly at the throng of people dancing. "Well, let's get you home then. Maybe we can come back tomorrow," she murmurs sadly. My stomach twists with guilt.
I decide to tell her that I'm leaving when we get back to her ranch. She and I leave the tavern, and as the wooden doors swing shut behind me, I catch one last glance at Link. He gives me a smug wink, and I roll my eyes. I turn to Malon, who I realize saw the whole thing.
"Per-sonally, I prefer that pretty brown-haired boy you were dancin' with before, but the heart wants what the heart wants, I 'spose," she teases.
I wave my hands in front of me. "Oh no. He's just an old friend who enjoys making me miserable, that's all."
She clasps her hands together by the side of her face and bats her eyelashes. "Ah yes, 'cause you seemed oh so miserable when you were with him."
I sigh. "Well, it doesn't matter if I like him," I say, giving up my attempts to disagree, "because I'm not going to see him again after tomorrow anyway."
"We'll see. The goddesses seem to always have a way of—hic—linin' these things up," she replies, throwing an arm around my shoulders.
Her close proximity lets me finally smell the alcohol on her. She's not too drunk, but enough that her cheeks are flushed and her coordination is a bit off. She still leads us back without a problem.
When we return to the ranch, she goes into one of the barns so quickly that I thought she had fallen. I peek inside to see her shaking hay off of the apron I had left here earlier that night.
She hands it to me and hiccups again. "Off to bed, sleepy head…" she mumbles, giggling softly at her rhyme. I smile.
When we go inside, Malon insists on tucking me into bed, and I let her because when I said no she looked like she was about to cry. She pulls the covers up over me, and I have to dodge her attempt to plant a goodnight kiss on my forehead.
"Mmkay, g'night Miss Hilda," she says sleepily before leaving my room and closing the door behind her.
The room is suddenly filled with a wonderful quiet, occasionally punctuated by cricket chirps from the open window. I can hear the chirps much better here than I could in the town. At home, I only ever heard one or two crickets in the gardens when I was there by myself. Out here, I hear dozens, possibly even hundreds of them. Blissful, I let them sing me to sleep.
HEY GUYS! So remember when I said I'd update in November...heh. Oops. If you want the real reason, it's because a) school kicked my ass all year, and b) I got into a relationship! He actually has read most of this story. He says he likes it, but I think he's just being nice. Anyway, yes, I am having surgery tomorrow, but it's nothing serious. Honestly, I'm hoping to write more while I recover, but...welp, you know me.
I hope you enjoyed this little chapter! I know I enjoyed writing Malon and nervous Zelda. And yes, I leave a lot, but I promise, I won't ever abandon this story completely. Bear with me, y'all. :)
Wish me luck~!
