See Chapter 1 for info & warnings

Once upon a time, I was falling in love

Now I'm only falling apart.

Nothing I can say

It's a total eclipse of the heart.

~Bonnie Tyler "Total Eclipse of the Heart"

"Master Yoda, I cannot stay here. I know that I must live with the past, must come to terms with it, but I cannot do that here. The memories are far too close."

Looking before him at the Jedi Knight's kneeling form, Yoda nodded. "It is as I thought. If go you must, I know a place."

Relief flooded Tanilea. "Thank you, Master." She knew the wounds on her heart could never heal-or even become scars-while she still spent her nights in a bed she had shared with Qui-Gon, still ate at the table where they shared their first meal together. The memories picked the scabs from her bleeding heart as soon as they formed. /No healing can take place here./ "Where should we go?"

"Already know, you do."

Tanilea searched her mind. And then she realized it was not her mind she needed to search, but Master Yoda's. "Dagobah."

"Yes. To Dagobah will you go. Padawan O'A'bre can learn much of the Force there. And you can begin to heal."

"Thank you." She rose to leave, heart lighter than it had been in weeks.

"Tell Jedi Kenobi of your departure, will you?"

The thought stopped Tanilea dead in her tracks. Without turning, she replied, "I do not know, Master." And she left the Council chamber.

It was the first time Tanilea had faced her friend since the funeral. She wondered if the change Obi-Wan's blue eyes, the deadly seriousness, was still there.

The second the door hissed open, she knew it was. He looked too grave, so much older. "Hi."

"Hello. Come in. Anakin is visiting with the queen."

"Ah." Tanilea stepped uneasily into his quarters. She forced her breathing to remain normal. Nothing had changed. Almost nothing. Now Anakin's things were mingled in with the room's meager amount of personal affects. But so much was the same. Tears sprang to her eyes, but she willed them away. "I didn't realize Padme was still here."

"She returned to see Anakin. They have become good friends."

/Friends. Yes. Here I stand unable to look at the man who has been my best friend for more than ten years! Stop being foolish, Tani./ "Obi, I-I'm leaving. We are. I am taking Livien to Dagobah. Master Yoda suggested it. I... I can't stay here any longer, Obi. You understand, don't you?" /Please say you do,/ she prayed silently.

His expression softened. "Yes. Of course I do. Do you think I feel any differently? Don't you think it hurts every time I walk into this room? I sleep in his bed now. And I can still feel him here. Every moment of every day..." His words ended in a sob.

Without any form of conscious thought, Tanilea was holding him close, his head resting on her shoulder. The tears she had held back before now wet her face with their warmth. "I'm sorry, Obi. I didn't mean to say it doesn't hurt you."

"I know," he whispered, almost in her ear. "I know. And if I could leave... I feel I should train Anakin here as Master Qui-Gon would have. Just promise me you'll come back." He pulled away, holding onto her shoulders. "Promise me."

"I promise, Obi. I will come back."

He managed a pale imitation of a smile. "I'll hold you to that, Tani. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too."

He hugged her fiercely, holding her as if for the last time. "Please don't forget. I can't stand to lose anyone else."

/Neither can I,/ she told him quietly through the Force.