While I Was Away

By: Naru-chan

Disclaimer: I don't own "DNAngel" for sure!

Naru-chan: AHHHH, I'm SOOO SORRY!

Dark: Honestly, she is! She spent all day working on this!

Daisuke: You see, after she went to China she couldn't update…and then her parents made her go to Canada just when she got back…

Naru-chan: Gomen ne Minna-san! I made this chapter longer! And I'm working on my other fic Someone Just For Me as well if you read that!

Dark: This chapter's good though!

Satoshi: A lot of things happen…

Naru-chan: So I hope you enjoy! I promise to update sooner now!

Riku: But remember…school starts soon.

Dark: Yeah. Today, instead of doing her summer reading, she finished writing for you guys!

Naru-chan: Oh, and a ton of things happened in China if you guys are curious! It'll help me with writing! Enjoy!

"He Knowth Not that the Dead are Thine"

The weapon that you fought with was a word,

And with that word you stabbed me to the heart.

Not once but twice you did it, for the sword

Made no blood start.

They have not tried you for your life. You go

Strong in such innocence as men will boast.

They have not buried me. They do not know

Life for its ghost.

-Mary Colerige

Chapter Twelve: His Most Important Person

"I've loved Riku since the moment she got here." Dark paused, thinking of the right words to say. Daisuke waited quietly. "To be honest, she first reminded me of my first love. She doesn't look too much like her, but…Riku shares her smile. Heh…Their hearts are both pure and sweet… To me, they alone are special in my heart, despite all the others who want me. I carry a torch for them that neither seems to diminish. Of course, I don't want them to, but…then again…"

Once again, there was a long pause and Dark swallowed hard.

"But…I soon realized that she wasn't like my first love. Riku is…Riku. She's kind, nice, funny, cute, beautiful…and yet she can be so boisterous," he chuckled, more to himself than Daisuke. "She has such a great left hook. Believe me, I know. She's just so…so wonderful; Like a breath of fresh air. She's no one else and no one can be her. To explain my feelings…is so hard. I don't know why…maybe because I…don't want to let it go. If I say I love her I'm afraid…that it will leave me…like the words leave my mouth." Here he looked up at Daisuke with a pained expression. His hands clenched and unclenched into fist. "I don't want this feeling to ever go. If I love her, it makes me feel so complete…! I've never…really felt this way before…

"When she smiles, I smile…when she laughs I laugh…and when she's sad…"

"When she's sad you feel like you're dying…" Daisuke continued for Dark softly, staring despondently at his hands. "And it's the worst if you can do nothing about it, right…?"

"…Yeah…and that's the thing. Sometimes she is and I…I can't do anything about it…I can't even wipe the tears from her face…! She won't let me because it seems…that she doesn't quite…know if she has feelings for me or not…" Dark finished despondently, with a sigh, not looking at Daisuke. "What about you…?"

"Well, you see…when Riku was still in Japan, I…" Daisuke began, but trailed off for a moment. Revealing such things hurt, since it made him say all the horrible things he thought of himself aloud. "I totally ignored her. I didn't even get to know her. I only saw her as…Risa's older twin. At the time I was…too infatuated with Risa. And before I knew it, I…had feelings for Riku and Riku alone.

"It's…kind of funny," he chuckled quietly to himself. "I mean…there's nothing funny about the whole situation but…had I only noticed her before then…I wouldn't have felt any of this pain in my heart now. Of course, she might not have liked me, but it would have been better than this whole messy situation. But then again…pain is good for me, isn't it? People don't realize that I know I'm a rather protected person. They don't think I'm selfish, but I know I am…

"Dark…you love her too…" he smiled. "Anyone can see why we love her…it's her smile, her frown, her laugh, and…her whole personality. She just draws us in and doesn't let us go. To be honest, you might love her more than I do. But then…I love her nonetheless. I'd be willing to die for her a million painful deaths just for her. That's how I know I love her…"

"I know I love her because…I'm willing to give up my happiness for hers…" Dark answered slowly. "If she wants to be with you…then…"

"I am too," Daisuke agreed. "But then…I still want her with me. Can you forgive me for that? I don't even think I can at times…"

"I don't blame you," Dark replied reasonably. "I want to be with her so much it burns…"

"There's selfish love and unselfish love. Selfish would be seen as bad, wouldn't it? But I don't understand… I love her selfishly because I want to be with her always. I don't want to see her with someone else. I love her so much I can't let her go. I just can't. What's so…bad about that…?" He shook his head as Dark began to reply. "I know unselfish love is probably better. You would let her fly free… All I'm saying is…is it that wrong that I love her in a different way…?

"But you know," he said after he took a deep breath, "this pain isn't that bad. Really, it isn't. If she returns your love, I won't regret anything. If I cry…if I wish I were dead…I still would hold onto this pain. I might not be able to feel, for surely I'll be numb both inside and out, but…if I have to feel all that pain to show just how much I truly loved her…I'll be okay with that. Plus…she'll be happy without me. She's been happy without me for the past six months. But I'm not one to give up. I love her enough…to not give up…" He gazed silently at the veiling, his lips curling to a soft smile.

Dark couldn't bring himself to look at Daisuke.

If she knew about his feelings…



"You want me to…meet someone…?" Riku repeated, having no idea who she was going to meet. She looked up at him and felt her breath get caught in her throat at the sight of his smile. She quickly focused on the ground.

"Yeah…there's been someone I've wanted you to meet for a long time now," he confirmed. He sighed a little, but not loud enough for her to catch. "Do you…want to?"

"Uh, but what about…" she drifted off. She then looked up and met his eyes directly, her face beginning to flush. "I…actually, I'd really like that."

Dark almost swallowed hard, but held it inside. "Okay." He continued to smile as he held out his hand. She hesitantly touched it with her gloved hands. He took a firm hold of it and laughingly began to run, forcing her, in her surprised state, to stumble with him. "Come on…!"

"W-Where are we going?" she managed. She had to use her free hand to push hair out of her face.

"You'll see…!" he turned momentarily, flashing her his famous grin.

"Why are we running?" she demanded as she almost tripped.

"Because running is fun!" he panted slightly. "Don't you realize that no one does this aside from in Paris? Who else out there just starts running down the street? To be honest, no one does! They're too occupied worrying about how others see them! It's so silly! What's wrong with running?" he laughed, "That is how we have become fat idiots!"

"Hey…!" she blushed. "Are you calling me fat?"

"Ha ha ha," he laughed before spinning around and suddenly lifting her into his arms in a wedding-like pose. "No at all…you're as light and delicate as a feather."

"Help! What's happening?" she instantly cried out in distress.

"You don't have to squeeze me so hard. I won't drop you." He smiled down at her, his face so close she felt her face reddening because she could feel his breath on her face.

"Huh? S-Stop! Don't get so close! LET GO OF ME!" She demanded, desperately trying to shove his face away, only to end up nearly falling on the cold, hard ground. She cried out in alarm and fright and automatically grabbed onto his neck tightly.

"Although…" Dark said, half smirking and half smiling in his charming way. His cheeks had the slightest tint on pink. "…I'm not complaining about it."

"I-IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK!" Her yell caused other merry people on the street to turn and giggle, whispering something about "newly weds".

"What a stubborn girl you are! You know, it would be easier if you would just be quiet," he laughed quietly to himself as he began trotting on his way, with her still in his firm arms. "But then again, you would be Riku I know and adore, would you?"

Riku didn't know what to say. Whenever he said something so sweet, she was always rendered speechless. She couldn't help but look away from him. Dark had…a kind and sweet side. She had known that for a long time now, despite his cocky side. And she knew this side of him was reserved for those he only deeply cared for and respected. Usually, this would affect her, but today she it did more. Already her world had been thrown into chaos because of Daisuke's surprise and shocking arrival. Now she was struggling to clear her ambiguous feelings for the two similar yet totally different people she cared for. She bit down on her lips painfully.

Daisuke…he had never left her heart. One's first true love always is a part of the one they affected. It was almost as if her heart was a silent, unmoving ocean and he was a drop of water that just rippled over her whole being. All he had to do was smile and say her name and her heart was a hurricane. At the start, there had been only pain, but now… there was something in his red eyes… it was new …and yet not. She had seen it before… but in Dark's red eyes.

Dark…though Daisuke had always been with her, Dark alone made her temporarily forget the hurt she had gone through. With him…she wanted to fit back the broken pieces of his soul. Sometimes she wondered if he even knew himself. His personality was a flash of blinding colors. It is so blinding, almost no one sees the soft, kind colors behind it. Sometimes… Riku felt he was only putting on a show because he was scared of being hurt. He was like her, in that way. And yet…he had the courage to love again. He opened himself so much to her. He wanted her to be courageous and love again as well because he thought of her as a strong woman. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt him…

"I wish I could always be the one to lift you up," he whispered softly, causing a small bit of white air to come out of his mouth. He did not look at her, but she looked up at him. The sun streamed down on his face and it accentuated the lines of his strong jaw and cheeks. A little smile graced his face. It was only the slightest bit of one – barely for it was just the bare edges of his lips that curved upward - so it seemed etched with sadness…but he was smiling nonetheless. Only Daisuke and Dark could smile through pain.

"Don't…say such things," Riku muttered, feeling herself blush even more. "I never know what to say…"

"Then don't say anything," he answered. "I can fill the silence. Or…we can be silent together. I don't mind…as long as I'm with you I'm content. Really, I am."

"Yeah…I know," she murmured to herself.

It wasn't as if she was stupid. Her mind was screaming for her to obviously pick Dark. Dark had been there for her when she needed him most. He had been there for her when she had no one else; when she needed to have somebody – anybody! – to be with her and love her alone. But then again…why did Dark love her? He said it was love at first sight, but…

"We're here!" he announced in a tone mixed with determination and happiness, and yet…a tint of sorrow.

Riku dragged her gaze away from him only to have her eyes widen as big as saucers. Time stood still for a moment and her blood ran colder than the bitter, icy snow around her. A bell ran off in her head and her heart cracked just the slightest bit.

In front of them…was a graveyard.


"Daisuke…? Daisuke…! Daisuke!"

"Huh? Ah?" he blinked, finally resurfacing. He turned and found himself terribly close to Risa's face. His lips slowly, as if they had the whole day, curved upward into a warm smile. "I'm sorry. Is there something you want?"

She blushed instantly and pulled back, bringing her hand to cover part of her face by habit. She stuttered, "Ummm…that is…what was it again…?"

Daisuke continued to smile, but felt like chuckling. Risa was so cute sometimes. When she acted like this, it made him think of Riku. Of course, Riku would be different. She wouldn't have control over her voice so she would end up screaming almost. Not that she meant to yell. She just didn't know how loud her voice could be.

"That is…I was just going to check up on you and I was surprised to see you out of bed, much less doing something," she managed. She fiddled idly with her lacy white skirt nervously.

"Ha ha," he laughed. "Don't worry. I'm fine. Really I am. Maybe…I can spend a little time with Riku…"

She bit down on her lips. Of course he didn't want to spend time with her… Of course he wanted to be with Riku…of course… She forced herself to smile. "That would be lovely. However, you shouldn't push yourself! If you're sick it won't help at all if you went…!"

"What you say is true," he agreed. "But…"

He took a moment to look down at what he was doing. In front of him was his sketchbook and pencil. He had been drawing the scenery outside. Paris was very beautiful. Just the view outside was stunning. He blinked as the paper began to slide down. He fumbled with it and stopped when he spotted a sketch of Riku. He hadn't even realized he had drawn it…!

"Even if I'm sick…even if I'm about to faint…I want to be with Riku," he finished finally. He turned to look up at Risa. "The one I want to be with the most is…Riku. But thank you for caring about me. You're such a good friend."

It was as if a knife had run through Risa's heart. Her smile faltered so she quickly turned away to face the white curtains near the window. Her throat was dry as sand so she was surprised when she heard herself speak.

"What's so special…about…friends?" she muttered.

"Hmmm?" Daisuke blinked, not hearing her. He had been putting his things on the bed so he hadn't heard. He stood up and looked at her curiously. "What was that?"

"N-Nothing!" she said in a laughing tone. "What's the matter with me…?"

"Is something wrong?"

"I want to talk to you for a minute. Do you…really like Riku that much?"

"Riku?"

"I know you do, but…it doesn't seem…! That is – is there no one else you can like as much?" she found herself almost shouting. She had turned to look at him without realizing it either.

"I-"

She didn't know it, but she had rushed over toward him and now was facing him with a helpless look on her face. She had no control of her body. Desperately, she clung onto his shirt and buried her face in his shoulder, nearly causing him to stumble back.

"It just doesn't seem right! Do you really love her?"

"I-"

He was once again cut off when the door opened. There stood Satoshi. His face was expressionless as usual, but it was actually unusual for only around his closest friends did his appearance change in just the slightest way. His eyes, when he was with those he held dear, melted in the slightest way. Those that knew him well knew that he was vulnerable with the ones he cared for. But now his frosty cobalt eyes landed on Daisuke and held before they slid to Risa and for a moment, she felt that they bore through her soul. Then he looked away.

"I'm sorry. It seems I have interrupted you two," he drawled in an indifferent tone. "Mademoiselle Mio wishes to talk to you, Risa."

"Ah…!" she jolted upward, letting go of Daisuke as if contact with him burned. She had been captivated by his freezing stare. Chills now ran down her spine as she stepped away from the redhead and she found she was trembling. She swallowed hard, trying to calm herself down. She couldn't look Satoshi in the eye. "Y…Yes, I'll…get on that right now," she fumbled for words as her numb legs walk unsteadily to the door. Satoshi stepped away from, almost fearing to even brush against her. Her eyes burned and she bit down on her lips hard enough to make them bleed, but she tasted her own betrayal rather than blood.

Satoshi took a moment to calm himself down when he turned and closed the door after her. It wasn't Daisuke's fault…it wasn't even Risa's. Still…it pierced his already fragile heart. He now looked at his old, and first friend.

Daisuke looked, and felt, confused. He wasn't sure what exactly was going on, but he had a hunch it wasn't so good. He nervously ran a hand through his disheveled scarlet hair. He had done nothing wrong, but he felt the weight of sin on his shoulders.

"Satoshi, that wasn't…"

"Wasn't what?" Satoshi said curtly, hating himself for not being able to control his voice, nor his flaring emotions.

Daisuke cleared his throat uncomfortably, feeling color flood his face. He didn't want to say "It didn't look like your girlfriend was making a play on me!" He tried to smile, but if waned.

"Risa was…just worried about me. She knows I…am hurt because I'm not…with Riku," he tried to explain. He wasn't sure if what he was saying was the truth, but it didn't sound like a lie to him. Risa even remotely liking him more than a friend was 100 impossible in his eyes. Risa was nothing more than a friend! They both just cared for each other. But as friends. Strictly friends.

"…If you want to try to get closer to Riku you should…try to find some alone time with her during the festival…" Satoshi heard himself say. "I can find a way to make it so."

"Oh? Wow! Thanks Satoshi!" Daisuke said gratefully. At this, Satoshi looked at him sharply. "I really couldn't figure out where to start at all! I'll work on it! I can't thank you enough!"

Satoshi suddenly reached out and grabbed Daisuke. Ulp! Thought Daisuke.

"How…how can you be so thankful to someone who's been so rude to you?" His ice blue eyes stared intently at Daisuke.

"Ow! Let go…" Daisuke cried as Satoshi's grip tightened painfully.

"How…How can you smile at the person who didn't want to help you come find what is most important?" his eyes now carried a look of pure pain. "You know…"

"Sa--!" Daisuke cried as Satoshi's grip tightened even more.

"I can capture you as easily as this."

"Satoshi!"

"But I…I can never allow anything to get in my way…" Satoshi said agonizingly.

Satoshi… Daisuke realized. This is the first time…I've seen you in such pain.

"I didn't want to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you!" he grinded his teeth together. "So…stay away from me when you defenses are down. Or else…I might not be able to control myself. I love Risa so I have no choice!"

Ah… This is why I've always thought Satoshi felt distant.

"Even if…" his hands slowly slid off if Daisuke's arm. "…I have to hurt you in the process."

But it's a distance he doesn't want.



"Here we are," Dark said softly. He gently let Riku down, not knowing how shaky her knees were. He began walking and it took him a little time before he realized Riku hadn't followed him. He turned and smiled a bit at her. "What's wrong?"

"Ah! That is…" she glanced away before returning his small smile, "nothing. Nothing's wrong."

Slowly she walked forward. Dark continued on and she walked behind him, staring disoriented at the gray stone path her shoes clicked against. She wondered whom exactly they were meeting. She wanted to believe it her fallacy that it was his relative or something, but her heart and gut told her otherwise. When he stopped walking, she nearly walked into his back, but quickly stumbled back. The grim, large black letters divulged her fear, and she barely kept from crying. "MENOU".

Dark crotched down and touched the white lilies that lay near the grave hesitantly.

"Mio has already been here…" he said more to himself than Riku.

"This is…" she choked. "What is this?"

"I thought you'd like to meet her," he smiled. "You two are so alike… I think you would have liked to know her. Everyone liked her… She was beautiful but she was beautiful inside as well. No one ever felt a kinder hand… And her smile was like spring coming during a cold hard winter. It's like your smile."

"So that's it…" she said lifelessly. She quietly turned around and began walking away.

"Huh? What? Wait!" he cried in alarm, instantly rising. He started after her. "What is this about…? Don't you want to meet her?"

"Meet her?" she cried, her voice filled with venom. "Meet her? What will that do?"

"Why are you being like this? Menou is important to me!" he yelled, angered.

"Important…" she said as she trembled. "Ever since you told me about her, I…I've been so afraid…that you only…" here she turned sharply to look at him. Tears filled her caramel eyes and they threatened to spill over her flushed cheeks. A look of pain and insecurity covered her face. The words spilled from her mouth like tears. "You only liked me…because I'm just like Menou! So afraid…

"All you talk about is how I'm like her! How can I compete with her…? You loved her so much…! It's no wonder why you'd want to find someone just like her and claim you loved her too…! I'm so afraid you only want to capture me…because you couldn't capture her!" she screamed. She took a short second to catch her breath before saying, "We can talk later…but right now…leave me alone…"

She then ran off, leaving Dark standing in the bitter snow with a look of hurt on his face.

"Riku…it's not true…" he said aloud, though she now couldn't hear him. "Only my feelings for you…make me whole!" A gust of wind blew fiercely and his long purple hair danced wildly around his face as he looked away. "I really just don't get…women…"


Riku ran away blindly. Her tears blurred her vision. She completely felt numb and forgot the fact that she was running as it was snowing. She suddenly felt herself slip and fall against the hard, cold ground. Around her, people were exulting so happily. The green and red lights twinkled cheerfully at her as she bent over, bundling into a ball, and sobbed into her arms. She didn't know what to do anymore…!

I shouldn't have said that…to Dark… her hands clenched as she heard herself cry "I've been so afraid…you only liked me because I'm like Menou!" in her head again. When I said it out loud… I felt ten times worse than I already did… Why did I say that to him? For a moment…I saw such pain on his face… I should never…have said that… Dark…

"Riku…? Are you alright?" a worried voice called to her as warm, welcoming arms wrapped around her. She looked up to in shock to see Daisuke holding her with such concern on his face. He had actually gone on a walk and happened to see her through the crowd. His red eyes scanned over her.

"Did you get hurt?" he asked, stroking her hair. "Don't cry…!"

"Oh, Daisuke…" she sobbed into his chest. "I was…lost…" she improvised.

"If you're the one who's lost…" he whispered to her softly. He hugged her tighter, but comfortingly. "I'll come find you…"


Naru-chan: Well…? What do you think?

Dark: AHHHHH! WHY?

Daisuke: By the way, I'm in the next chapter a lot.

Satoshi: I was so…hurt in this chapter…

Dark: Feh, more like dorky!

Satoshi: …At least no one ran away from my ugly face.

Dark: WHAT WAS THAT?

Daisuke and Naru-chan:holds Dark back:

Naru-chan: Ahaha…! I've already got what's going to happen next down so review and I'll update! Love you!