Characters belong to Shonda. The rest is mine.
One More Try: Chapter Twelve
ELIZA'S POV
Three weeks later…
Yeah, this day can officially suck it. It can suck it big time. All I want is to be at home. Or with Arizona at least. The last few weeks have consisted of us just getting back to being a family. They've consisted of happiness and I don't worry as much. Sure, it's still there in the back of my mind at times, but my wife was truthful when she told me she was there for me. My wife was being honest when she told me she was here to help me through everything. Honestly, I'm not sure what I'd do without her and she knows that. She's been nothing short of amazing and every moment I spend with her lately feels like a blessing. I mean, I have a gorgeous wife and two incredible kids. That's all I need to focus on. If I focus on that alone, nothing can go wrong. If I remember why I'm here and why I'm happy, everything else is forgotten about. At least, most of the time it is. I do sometimes wonder if I'm good enough for them, I won't lie. I do sometimes think about how I've hurt Arizona with my accusations and then it hits me. I've been a complete bitch. The worst. Why she still even gives me the time of day, I'll never know…but she does. She does because she loves me. Our family. Everything that we are. She loves me and she tells me that more so now than ever before.
She doesn't need to tell me, though. Her actions alone tell me how much I'm loved and cared about. How she looks at me and how she touches me. How she stands back and watches on as I relax with our girls. Yeah, she loves me and honestly, I think I love her more now than I ever have. At one time I wouldn't have thought that possible, but the last few weeks have shown me that my wife is totally here for me. She's got my back…just like she's always had. There are no two ways about it, and I get that now. I get that I'm allowed to feel weak at times. I get that I'm allowed to feel unsure about what each day will bring. I'm only human after all. Human with a world of emotions lately. So, I'm trying. I'm really trying. For myself, but also for my family. The only family I have and right now, the only family I will ever need.
Finishing up in my office. E x
Setting my cell down on my desk, I clear away the test papers I've been working through and relax back in my seat. I'll just give myself five minutes and then I'm outta here. I've loved being back at work, but it's Friday and I'm ready for the weekend to arrive. I'm more than ready. This week has been pretty full on in terms of balancing work and time with our girls, but we've somehow managed it. We've managed and sitting down to dinner together each night has been kinda nice. That's a lie. It's been awesome. Just like it used to be before my mood got in the way of everything. Honestly, I haven't had a single bad day this week and I just hope it continues. I hope this good feeling I have lately lasts more than five minutes. I can see how happy it makes Arizona, so yeah…I need this to last.
"There you are…" A familiar soft voice pulling me from my thoughts, I glance up to find Arizona standing in the doorway. "The most beautiful woman in the world…"
"What are you after?" I narrow my eyes, a small smile curling on my mouth.
"You." She shrugs. "And I'm hoping that can happen."
"Oh." I raise an eyebrow. "Is there a particular reason you're trying to win me over?"
"No, but it's a thing I'm working on." She moves further inside my office. "Each morning, I plan to make you fall in love with me. I mean, I know it's not morning, but you left before me, so?"
"Don't waste your time." I stand and round my desk. "I already fall in love with you each morning." My ass resting on the edge of my desk, Arizona closes the distance between us and stands between my legs. "More and more…"
"Yeah?" Okay, she sounds shocked. "You do?"
"Of course, I do." My arms wrapping around my wife's waist, I pull her in closer. "Just watching you drinking coffee makes me fall head over heels in love with you…"
"Come away with me…" She whispers against my lips. "Tonight."
"Uh…" Pulling back, I study her face. "I think you're forgetting the fact that we have two small children at home. One…very small."
"So, I kinda did something." Arizona shrugs, her smile widening. "And it was kinda meant to be a surprise but well, I'm telling you now…"
"Telling me what?"
"Mom and dad are collecting the kids from daycare…" She replies. "We have an hour to get home and get some things together."
"W-Why?" I furrow my brow.
"I've booked us into a spa for the weekend." She smiles. "Our wedding anniversary is next Wednesday, right?"
"Right." I nod.
"And I figured we could spend some time alone this weekend and just relax. Mom offered to take care of the kids at our place, so?"
"So, we're going away?" I ask.
"We are." Arizona nods as my hand wraps around her the back of her neck. "Just us. You and me."
"And there it is…"
"What?" She gives me a look of confusion.
"Me…falling in love with you for like the tenth time today." Pulling her into me, my lips press against her own and a low moan rumbles in her throat.
"I cannot wait to really be alone with you…" She runs her thumb across my bottom lip. "Just us. No distractions."
"You think the kids will be okay?" Giving me a look of uncertainty, I'm beginning to think that Arizona is under the impression that I don't want to go. "I'm just asking…"
"The kids will be fine, Eliza." She gives me a sad smile. "If you don't want to go, though?"
"No, I do." I try to reassure my wife. "I promise."
"Okay." Her forehead rests against my own and she releases a slight sigh. "Whatever you want, okay?"
"I want you and me alone in a gorgeous spa," I say with complete certainty. "I want that so much."
"Then…my wish is your command." Pulling me away from my desk, she releases me from her grip. "Come on, beautiful. Let's get outta here."
Yes. Now that…I am more than capable of doing.
"Okay, so should we call and check on the kids?" Stepping up to the huge floor to ceiling window, I rest against the wall surrounding it and take my glass of wine between my lips.
"Again?" Arizona asks. "I only called what? Forty minutes ago…"
"Right, yeah." I clear my throat. "Sorry."
"Don't be sorry." She steps up behind me and wraps her arms around my waist. "If you wanna call again, go for it."
"N-No." I shake my head. "Your mom will think I don't trust her."
"No, she won't." Arizona states. "We haven't left Nevaeh before so she totally gets it."
"Except you have." I scoff. "When I kicked you out."
"Hey…" My wife turns me in her arms and furrows her brow. "None of that is even being discussed, Eliza." She gives me a knowing look. "We are good. We are okay."
"I know but I'm being a needy bitch and you have already spent time away from them…because of me." Disappointed that I'm allowing this to affect our evening, I drop my gaze and Arizona dips her head a little, curling her fingers under my chin.
"Hey…" Her gorgeous smile instantly settling me when my eyes find her own, a small smile of my own curls on my lips. "That's better." Her lips pressing softly against my own, my hand settles on my wife's hip and I feel a little more relaxed. "This weekend is about us."
"I know." I agree. "And I'm really trying to keep it that way…"
"I know you are." She says, confidently. "Tonight we relax and tomorrow we spend the day with treatments and being pampered, yeah?"
"Sounds perfect." I breathe out. "Can we sit for a while?" I ask.
"Of course." Pulling me towards the bed, I climb up and rest back against the headboard. Joining me, Arizona shifts a little and rests her head on my shoulder. "You okay, Eliza?"
"Yeah." I sigh. "I just…I had some things I wanted to say to you…"
"O…kay." She lifts her head, a little worry evident on her face. "W-What is it?"
"Just…these past few weeks have shown me just how strong we are." I take her hand in my own. "You haven't once run since I told you how I was feeling and I know that you never will. Deep down, I've always known that."
"Good."
"But the way I treated you was dreadful and I need you to know that I'm so very sorry." Pressing my lips to the back of my wife's hand, she gives me a sad smile. "I know I always run. I know I'm the one who always messes up in our relationship and I am sorry. So sorry, Arizona."
"You have nothing to apologize for…"
"But I do." I shake my head. "I know I've been feeling really awful, but you didn't deserve any of what I put you through. I mean, we were bordering on divorce and that doesn't sit well with me at all. Just…I hope you really can forgive me for how I treated you."
"There is nothing to forgive." She turns her body a little and faces me fully. "I know you feel bad about it all, but I don't. Now that I know the issues you are…or were having, we can deal with it together. I wouldn't ever want anyone to go through those low moods alone and you know I'm totally here for you."
"I know." I smile. "You mean the world to me, okay?" I shift a little closer to my wife. "No matter what happens, I just need you to know that I love you more than anything in this world. You and our girls."
"Nothing is going to happen." She takes my wine glass from my hand and sets it down on the nightstand. Pulling me into her body, I nuzzle my face into the crook of her neck and release a deep sigh. I'm trying to stop myself from crying but this is my wife. She wouldn't want me to hold anything back, tears included. Allowing them to fall freely, Arizona tightens her grip on my body and holds me like nobody else in this world ever could. There is just something about being held by the one woman who would give up her life for you. "I've got you, baby."
"Thank you," I whisper, my tears beginning to subside. "For everything."
"Anything for you, Eliza."
"And this…" I pull back and glance around the room. "This is incredible."
"Well, you are incredible." She shrugs. "And I wanted to show you that in some kinda way."
"Y-You have." I give her a sad smile. "But you matter just as much in all of this."
"We're in this together." She throws me a wink. "Anything you need…you've got it."
"I just need you." I give my wife a full, genuine smile. "You and our beautiful family…it's all I'll ever need."
"And you are all we will ever need." She leans in, her lips pressing below my ear. "You make us complete, Eliza…don't ever forget that."
"You think we will be okay?"
"Baby, we are so in love that it's ridiculous." She rolls her eyes playfully. "Of course, we will be okay. We are always okay." Relaxing back, Arizona's arms wrapped around me, a comfortable silence falls between us but I'm not concerned. We are both simply taking a moment to just be. We are both processing and we have been for a few weeks now. Yes, I treated my wife terribly, but she is here with me. She is here and holding me…just like she always does. "You know…there may or may not be a bottle of champagne chilling beside the bathtub."
"Oh." I sit up, my eyebrow raised. "Wonder how that happened…"
"I've no idea but remind me to thank them downstairs." Smirking, I know it was my wife's idea. It's just something she would do. It's completely Arizona and yeah…I freaking love it. Climbing from the bed, she pulls me up to my feet and wraps her arms around my waist. "You wanna pop it, or?"
"Only if you're joining me in there…" I narrow my eyes. "It would be rude to relax and drink it alone."
"Damn right it would." She takes my bottom lip between her teeth.
"You know…you seem a little tense." I whisper against her mouth. "Maybe I could give you a massage of my own later tonight."
"Mm…" She smiles, a moan rumbling in her throat. "Now that sounds like my kinda thing."
"Yeah?" I ask.
"Well, you are my kinda thing so a massage from your gorgeous hands sounds like the perfect end to this beautiful day."
Taking me by the hand, my wife guides me into the bathroom and a huge tub awaits us. By huge, I mean really huge. She really has put a lot of thought into this weekend away for us and yeah, I totally want to make the most of it. I mean, I may be worrying six days out of seven, but this is a getaway for us. One that I believe is much needed. Her gorgeous body turning to face me, Arizona gives me one of her soft smiles and motions for me to prepare our bath. The sound of a cork popping, I glance back over my shoulder and watch as she pours two glasses of champagne. "Hey…" I pull her from her duties. "Did I ever tell you how incredibly beautiful you are?"
"You did." Her dimples pop. "Did I ever tell you?"
"All the time." Handing me a glass of champagne, Arizona strips her clothes from her body and my mouth salivates. Amazing. Setting my glass down, I begin removing my own clothes and for the first time in what feels like forever, I truly feel good about myself. Yes, we've been intimate a few times since everything got better, but my wife had to be the one instigating it. I don't want it to always be like that. I don't want to feel like I need that extra push to enjoy my marriage. I want to just be me again, and in this moment…I can feel it coming back. I can feel it deep within me trying to rise to the surface.
"After you…" She steps back and allows me to climb into the tub first. "And so you know…we ain't leaving this bathroom any time soon." Climbing in behind me, Arizona pulls my body back against her and reaches for our champagne. "Happy early anniversary, beautiful." Her lips pressing against the back of my neck, my heart rate hasn't felt this normal in a long time.
"God, I love you…"
Thanks for reading, guys. Reviews are welcome and appreciated as always.
