Author's Note: This chapter is a little bit short, I'm afraid, but the next few after are quite long, so I hope that makes up for it!

TRIGGER WARNING: Chapter Twelve and Chapter Thirteen contain some references to rape and violent sexual fantasies. Those scenes are intentionally vague - I don't believe in using violence or noncon for titillation purposes - but the implication is there, so do be aware of that if you have trigger concerns.

Chapter Twelve: Fact and Fantasy

Sydney Shatterdome…
September 2019…

Hercules Hansen never forgave himself for his self-deception. That he'd gone on clinging to the belief that his brother was a good man even when he saw the turn of Scott's thoughts in the drift. Herc knew Scott resented the Hassans, for their disdain of him and even just for their skill, but he told himself it was just old-school military attitude like Ketteridge, and harmless.

And if the turn of Scott's thoughts was disturbingly dark in the drift at times, well, those weren't real, they were fantasies. One of the core principles of drifting was not to take fantasies seriously, not to judge.

It wasn't always easy. Every man had his private kinks; that was no crime, as uncomfortable as it was when brothers shared headspace. Every man also had his dark side, his angry side… Herc knew that. The psych team didn't ask and Herc didn't tell. He told himself that it was just Scott being Scott.

Scott's fantasies sometimes ran dark and violent, but Herc knew from the drift that he'd found plenty of women whose tastes ran as rough as his. And if Scott's imagination sometimes went into a level of violence nobody would consent to… Herc told himself that lots of men thought that way.

It was only fantasy. Fantasy was harmless. Jaeger pilots couldn't judge what was only in someone's mind.

A man's a man, Marshal Ketteridge always said when the press or the brass brought up Scott's public persona. And Herc never mentioned the one he saw in the drift.

But when the faces that flashed in Scott's rough, creepy drift fantasies were familiar, even though Herc knew they weren't real, it was hard to ignore.

"What the HELL was that?!" Herc bellowed at his brother after a simulation a few months after Clawhook.

"It was me in a bad mood, and if you're really going to demand an accounting, I'll start taking notes on where your mind goes when it wanders!" Scott retorted.

"They're our partners, not a couple of your whores - " Herc caught himself when he realized Chuck was home. The kid was in his bedroom doorway, watching the exchange with wary eyes.

"Everything okay?"

In the corner of his eye, Scott blanched, and Herc had a feeling if he looked in the mirror, he'd be white too. Chuck ignored it when his father and uncle argued - until now. If they'd disturbed him enough that the closemouthed kid was willing to speak up...

Drop it, Herc. It wasn't real, Scott hissed through the ghost drift. He didn't want them fighting around Chuck, scaring the boy.

Herc mustered a smile and said, "Yeah, we're good. Just an argument."

Scott pointed playfully at Herc. "His fault." Herc thumped him. Chuck relaxed, and so did they.

For years, Herc wondered how different all of their lives - and others' lives - would have been if he hadn't let it go then.


October 2019...

October's event, two months or so after Clawhook, had the kaiju running east towards the US coast again. This time, the long-distance Jaeger came north from Panama. The bogey targeted the Seattle/Portland region, and the Chen twins brought Puma Real up to stand guard as backup for Chrome Brutus and Mammoth Apostle.

Gaduka was nearly as big as Yamarashi, and more aggressive than Clawhook. Cascade Victor and Yankee Star made the first intercept off the California coast, and both took some serious knocks before the kaiju ran north towards Vancouver. Chrome and Mammoth were waiting, and Puma jumped the gun and moved in to join them.

"Marshal Gagnon's going to throw a fit," Indra Hassan said as the Sydney teams watched in the war room.

"I'm not sure Carlos and Jordana were wrong, though," said Kyrra. "This bastard's right on the line with Yamarashi. Any bigger or meaner and we'll have ourselves a Category IV. They may start needing three-Jaeger drops."

Marshal Ketteridge nodded, looking at K-Watch's deployment report. "That's the plan. And tighter formations." He gestured to Sydney's four Rangers. "After this kill, Tactics is starting you lot on triple-teaming."

"Yeah? But are we staying in our old rust bucket or moving up to a new model?" asked Scott with a grin. There was a lot of gossip about the Mark-5 being built in Brisbane. It was so sophisticated – and expensive – that some of the UN representatives and PPDC brass were pushing for an experienced pilot team to be transferred, and for their older model to be turned over to the Academy newbies.

Ketteridge grinned back, though Herc rolled his eyes. "Well, we haven't got a sim program for the Mark-5 yet, but when we do..." He winked. "What's the matter, Herc, you like your antiques that much?"

"She's a classic," Herc replied as if Lucky Seven were a car, getting laughter and applause from some of the others.

"Someone get that man a Cadillac!"

"Remind me to introduce you to Gipsy Danger's LOCCENT Chief some time," said Indra. "Tendo Choi. He loves his vintage, says Lucky's got the most style in the fleet."

They all returned their attention to the battle taking place on the Canadian coast and applauded when Chrome and Mammoth pinned the kaiju between them for Puma to gut with precision. "The Mark-5's going to have a whole array of missiles," Kyrra mused, studying the latest blueprints. "But there's something tried and true about a good set of claws."

"The environmentalists are gonna have a fit about all that Blue," said Susanti, making a face. Gaduka was leaving a massive, toxic slick from the deep wounds inflicted by the Jaegers. "They need to cauterize. Is Mammoth Apostle out of burner fuel?"

"Probably, he made three passes already. There's one problem with the Mark-4 lot; they don't have the heat sources like the nuclear mechs. Still," Kyrra put her feet on the table with satisfaction as the California LOCCENT called the kill and everyone cheered on the speakers. "Everyone's still standing. Good fight."

Anticipation was rising around the Sydney Shatterdome over the impending testing of the Mark-5. The last of the Mark-4's had launched at the end of August and September, one for Japan and Korea, the other for China. The Mark-5 was going to be Australia's. The Academy had several candidate teams from down under, but Ketteridge wanted the new mech to go to the Hansens.

"He'll be the fastest, most sophisticated Jaeger in the world. I want our best crew in him."

Scott preened, but Herc saw the thin-lipped resignation in the eyes of the Hassans. Even though Devi and Susanti now had two engagements to their name compared to Lucky's one, the thought of proposing that Team Vulcan make the switch had never occurred to the Marshal.


"Are you not interested?" Herc asked Devi in the Kwoon a few days after the October attack.

"Not much point, is there?" she said wryly. But she waved him off as he started to muster something like regret or sympathy. "Don't worry about it. We're actually happy with Vulcan. He's a good mech, and we've gotten to know him. No kinks to worry about that we know of. Lucky may need some refitting if she's going to stay in service."

"Yeah, that's Scott's point. There's some lag in her systems, problems with signal breakdown in her extremities that need long-term attention. Either way, we'd have a spell out of commission for repairs." Herc brought his hanbō to bear and closed with her in a spar. "Stacker Pentecost is still trying to wrangle up funding for more of them. He wants five new mechs, and Tacit Ronin, Diablo Intercept, and Silver Lion all back in service."

"Good God, we'll be back on a shortage of pilots before too long. Who'd pay for another Mark-5?"

"That's the burning question." Herc landed a hit that she should have deflected. "Oh, come on, I'm not a washed-up old geezer; attack, already!"

"Sor-ry!" She retorted, and laid into him, until the air was full of the clack of wood on wood and their surroundings blurred with sweat and adrenaline.

Much better. The Academy taught Jaeger Bushido as a method for establishing compatibility, but once they had that, it served in a fight against an unpredictable opponent. Strike, parry, attack in dizzy circles, no holds barred, no restrictions.

She might be ten years younger, all her fighting experience confined to the rigid rules of elegant martial arts, but Devi Hassan had seen plenty of how Herc Hansen fought after two years. And she knew how fast he could process and react. He thought she overextended - and fell into a trap, her feet lashing out to tangle his. But he was already compensating even as he went down, and snagged her with one knee, pulling her down with him and using his bō to leverage his greater weight over her for the pin...

Devi tried to maneuver away, but didn't make it, only knocking him off balance, and he came down full force on her chest, catching himself hard on his elbow next to her face...

... her face an inch from his, liquid eyes bright with exertion, heart hammering beneath his...

Coherent thought deserted him as something he hadn't felt in four years returned in full fury, making his throat tighten and his blood thrum, and past and future faded amid the roaring in his ears as his vision tunneled to the face under his...

But he saw it in her eyes even as she went rigid, and he was pushing himself off her before she had a chance to put the words together. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"'s okay." Devi slid her hanbō onto the rack, grabbed her gear, and vanished.

Herc went to the showers, turned them on ice cold, and fought not to put his fist through the wall. Get a grip on yourself, Hercules. So you can still fight, she respects you, but you're an old soldier to her. Not some creep looking for younger ass, like... find someone your own age if you want to get back in the game. You've got no one to blame but yourself.


November 2019...

Naturally, Scott saw it in the drift the very next time he and Herc were in the simulator. "And what the hell was THAT?!"

A "moment." It happens, but I took the hint. Herc's face was hot as they came out of the sim pod. "What? All indignant on her behalf now, are you?" You don't have a leg to stand on.

"All this time, you've been calling me a sleaze," his brother hissed.

"And as you like to remind me, what's inside your head is out of your control!" Herc shot back. "Doesn't it hold for me too? What the hell - are you staking claims even on the ones not interested in you?! It's always been her sister you've been perving after!"

"That 'moment' wasn't just you." Scott's declaration brought Herc up sharp. "And, yeah, Her Highness there hasn't had the time of day for me. Apparently because I'm not you."

"Well, as you saw, she didn't have much more than that for me, seeing as I'm not Yancy bloody Becket!"

Oh, fucking Christ, I said that out loud.

Incredible, what could come flying out of the subconscious in a drift. A year ago, Herc had laughed with everyone else when Susanti reported her sister and Becket getting caught out by one of the C.O.s. It had never occurred to him to be jealous. The nudging and winking had stepped up again after Team Vulcan had returned from fighting Clawhook.

Before today, Herc would have sworn up and down that it was just funny and didn't bother him at all, because it wasn't as if he was interested in Devi Hassan. Sure, he found her attractive, anyone would, but nowhere near enough that he should feel envious of another bloke.

Shit, shit, shit.

Scott considered him, and his accusatory pose faded. "So. Even the great Hercules doesn't always get what he wants."

"Is that really what you've thought? Please." Herc sighed. "Adjust your expectations and don't blame a girl ten years younger for liking someone a little closer to her own age. She's a colleague. Good-looking woman, so yeah, I had a moment, but she wasn't interested. I'll get the fuck over it like a grown-up."

"They string us all along - "

"She didn't string ANYBODY along!" God, he wondered at his brother's logic. "She said no to you, she said no to me - you're the one who doesn't listen." None of them had ever said anything but no to Scott, for that matter. Did Scott really think the disgust and disdain that respectable women cast was all some elaborate hard-to-get scheme?

Scott's frustration and resentment whispered through the ghost drift. "Yeah, all right, I get it. No decent girl will ever want the likes of me."

"You know damn well that's not what I mean. But if you want a decent girl, try treating them less like they're for sale."


December 2019…

Herc really thought that was the end of it. Just another spat in the very different life philosophies of Herc and Scott Hansen, roughed up and smoothed over and easy enough to move on from. When the Hansens began doing remote simulations with Gipsy Danger, he didn't even flinch at the sound of the Beckets' names or look in the Hassans' directions.

Lucky Seven worked well with her fellows in the triple formations, racking up one of the highest group sim scores. Before long, they were in the top tier, forming the A-Team with their fellow Mark-1, Horizon Brave, and Gipsy Danger. The brass and the tacticians combined the triple teams from different Shatterdomes, aiming for the widest coverage possible. It meant that Lucky Seven and Vulcan Specter didn't get to do simulations together very often, which was disappointing, but Vulcan was another standout performer in the triple-Jaeger simulations. He was on regular sim runs with Coyote Tango and Crimson Typhoon.

The simulations didn't garner public acclaim like real engagements, but it was a bolster to Herc and Scott's egos that they were outperforming most of the other Mark-1 mechs, including those with better records, and many of the newer Jaegers with more cutting-edge technology.

Marshal Ketteridge could barely contain himself, anticipating the day the Mark-5 would arrive and Sydney Shatterdome would have three mechs. All they needed was another Australian team to graduate the Academy. It was nearly a foregone conclusion that the new team would inherit Lucky Seven, and the Hansens would become the first crew to get "promoted" to a new Jaeger.

As 2019 wound to a close, Herc was more concerned with Chuck, having seen the kid peeking at the application materials for the Academy. Don't even think about it, Boyo. "Not 'till you're eighteen," he said, trying to soften it with a smile.

Chuck sulked, as usual. "I've got my high school certificate this term! Danny Oliver's on his fourth try."

"You aren't Danny Oliver, and his parents aren't me," Herc replied. "You don't get to apply independently until you're legal age, and there's some things no school can teach on an accelerated term." Like not sulking when you don't get your way. "When you hit seventeen, next August, we'll talk. I'll consider it."

Somehow he couldn't fathom Chuck growing up that much in nine months, but stranger things had happened. The Academy didn't have a minimum age, but since underage applicants still had to have parent or guardian permission from their home country, Herc wasn't worried.

That was just another miscalculation in the annals of Hercules Hansen, another assumption that he staked too bloody much of his and other lives on.

Like a balancing block game, he piled certainty after certainty on just a few truths: that his brother was a good man, and that Herc, Chuck Hansen's father, was in control of the boy's future until he came of age.

And on December 16, 2019, as the Breach spat out its first Category IV, it all came tumbling down.

To be continued...

Coming Soon: The first Category IV kaiju. A three-Jaeger drop ends in catastrophe when the drift reveals to Herc what his brother has become in Chapter Thirteen: Manila.

PLEASE don't forget to review!

Original Character Guide

Marshall Blake Ketteridge: Commanding Officer of Sydney Shatterdome. Australia's senior liaison to the PPDC, a former Air Vice Marshall of the Royal Australian Air Force.

Kyrra Taior: Lucky Seven's Chief Engineer, Herc's age. Youngest and sole surviving daughter of Marian Taior, an elderly aboriginal woman who occasionally looks after Chuck.

Carlos and Jordana Chen: Pilots of Puma Real. Fraternal twins from Panama (also of Chinese descent), in their late 20s.

Devi and Susanti Hassan: Indonesian-Australian sisters, ages 29 and 27, who graduated the Academy along with Raleigh and Yancy Becket and Tendo Choi in the second half of 2016.

Indra Hassan: Devi and Susanti's cousin, age 39, failed the Jaeger Academy's second cut for drift compatibility but stayed on to become a LOCCENT technician. He serves the same role on Vulcan Specter's crew that Tendo Choi does for Gipsy Danger.