Author's Note: Hello, firstly I want to apologise to you all. I haven't updated in months because I haven't been obsessed with Hunger Games like normal, however, the recent pictures and trailer released have inspired me and reinstated my massive crush on Josh Hutcherson (he's so perfect!) Shout out to all you Peeta lovers! Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the Hunger Games.

I bury deeper into the pillow, trying to will away the unwanted thoughts of Peeta that have now flooded my mind.

Chapter 12

I wake up in the morning, feeling exhausted. I had yet another nightmare last night. Will it never end? I close my eyes and try to will my brain back into sleep, but it won't listen. I remain awake. It's no use. I sigh and force myself out of the warm comfortable bed, ready to face whatever will be thrown at me today. I stand up and stretch, my bones creaking in protest. Then I feel the sting of my bruise. However, I refuse to let that depressing thought ruin my day. I wander over to the mirror, pushing my tangled hair away from my eyes. I see the deep black circles from under my eyes and sigh. I look like I haven't slept properly in weeks. I roll my eyes and straighten my rumpled clothes. I spot my bag lying on the sofa from the train. I smile slightly. I knew I could trust Cinna. I grab it and open it, emptying the contents onto my bed. I carefully fold the silk scarf and blue hair ribbons neatly and put them into a drawer, meaning to give them to Prim and my mother later. I find Peeta's t-shirt crumpled up in the corner but I bring it out carefully, like if I clutch it too hard, it will break. I bring it to my nose and inhale deeply. It smells exactly like Peeta. Tears prick at the corner of my eyes but I will them away, wanting to be strong. Carefully I fold the t-shirt and gently place it under my pillow where I know it's safe. Wanting something to do, I wander over to the bay window and open the thick, heavy curtains, letting sunlight poor through the room in a flood of happiness and comfort. When you have lived in the Seam all your life, sunlight is a positive thing. It shows that you had survived the night, made it to a new day and ready to face whatever hardships were thrown at you. Just the thought of the sun rising up from the treeline, the sky streaked with pink and purple, bringing the promise of a new day just filled you with hope. A small knock brings me out of my reverie.

"Good morning Katniss," my mother smiles gently, walking into the room, looking slightly sleepy. She's dressed in a flowery print dress from her younger days, her tiny shoulders covered with a white cardigan to protect her from the cool breeze. It may only be late July, but as a person from the Seam; it means get ready for the harsh reality of winter as there is only one month left of the warm weather. Her long blonde hair is in a bun, shining slightly in the morning sunlight. Even though her face is worn and beaten down, she looks younger than she has done in years. I feel glad that even though I suffered so much in the Hunger Games, my family are happy and safe.

"Good morning mother," I reply cordially. I still feel annoyed about her comments from last night, but I'm not going to let her pettiness bother me. I have more important things right now that I need to focus on. Like Gale. I'm not happy that things were left the way they were between us. He hurt me deeply, not just physically but by his comments too. However I know I hurt him too, by playing my up my romance with Peeta for the cameras. Romantically, Peeta has been the only person I've ever had experience with, and I think that fact upsets Gale. However, it's in the past, I would like to move on from it as much as possible and forget it all. I want my life back, and I know that Gale plays a key role in helping my get my life back.

"I'm glad you're up," I hear my mother saying. "I wanted to wake you but I thought it was best to let you get as much sleep as possible. Have you got any plans for the day?"

"Thanks for the concern, but I'm fine." I smile while I say this but inside I just want to scream. "I was hoping to go into town and drop by the Hob. I want to visit Hazelle too; I haven't seen her in months." My mother smiles happily.

"Excellent. It'll be good for you to go to town, but remember, nothing strenuous; you want your injuries to get better not worse!" I frown a little.

"Mother, what do you think I'm going to do? I'm not exactly going to climb over the rooftops and fire arrows at the coal mines. I'm just going to take a walk!"

"I know Katniss, but you're so headstrong, you'd do anything you set your mind to. I just worry about you that's all. You're only sixteen." I glare at her back as she walks across my room, straightening my bed covers and picking up a cushion that fell off the window sill.

"I have been through a lot more than most sixteen year olds have!"

"I know that Katniss but-"

"But nothing! I'm not a little girl anymore! People have died at my hand, and in my opinion, that does not make you a child, so please stop treating me like one!" I turn on my heel and stomp out of the room, avoiding Prim who stands on the landing, her mouth open wide. I head into the bathroom and slam the door so hard the whole house shakes. I glare at my messy appearance in the mirror. Quickly, I peel off my nightwear and step into the shower, squealing a little at the freezing temperature. After waiting a few seconds, it's perfectly warm and heavenly to stand under, just like summer rain. I vigorously wash my hair and scrub my body, trying to peel away all the dirty layers of skin. Even though I washed my hands not even a day ago, I can still see the tributes' blood on them, no matter how hard I scrub. I let out a tiny sob then steel myself. I am not allowed to cry. I am not allowed to cry. I mumble these words over and over to myself, hoping that if I say them enough times they will come true. Gasping suddenly, I realise that the water is cold. Even though I live in Victor's Village, it doesn't mean I have the ultimate luxury like I had at the Capitol. I don't mind though, as the idea of life in the lap of luxury doesn't appeal to me. Sighing, I step out of the shower and dry my body, wrapping the towel tightly around my body. Cautiously, I open the bathroom door a tiny bit and stick my head out, watching out for my mother. I can't believe why we are falling out so much all of a sudden. We never used to be like that. I roll my eyes at how pathetic I am, acting like I'm scared of my mother. I feel like for the past five years, I've been her mother, looking after us and keeping us from the dreaded fate of the community home. I step out of the bathroom, shivering slightly from the chill. I walk into my room and head towards the closet, wanting my freezing body to be covered up as quickly as possible. I dress like I used to; solid boots that have seen better days, the tops covered by dark trousers and my father's tan leather jacket. I love that jacket. The leather is faded and worn, the lining soft and patchy from use. However, I still love it. The memories, comfort and security this jacket gives me is unreal. It helps focus me and keep me calm. When I wear it, I feel that my father is watching over me, protecting me. I braid my still damp hair and let it fall over my left shoulder. I walk down the stairs, wincing at every creak that gives my footsteps away. With my hunter's tread, I am usually silent but these stairs creak and groan at every step. It makes me wonder just how old these houses are. Were they built 74 years ago, only to be renovated every few years? I have no idea. I walk into the kitchen and grab an apple from the fruit bowl on the counter. I open the drawer that holds my monthly winnings. It's delivered in notes in an envelope per month, and according to law, I am allowed to ask for more if I should ever need it, however my the amount per month is so extortionate, I do not ever see myself asking for more. Clearly my mother or Prim have been to town lately, as some of the pristine notes have been exchanged for dirty district copper. I fish out a handful of coins and stick them in the zip pocket of the jacket. There's a lot I want to do today. Closing the drawer, I turn around to grab my game bag but my mother is sitting at the table, regarding me silently. Strange, I didn't even hear her come in. She hesitates a little but then speaks almost in a whisper.

"Katniss, while you're in town, would you mind getting me these things for the house? Also, Effie called whilst you were in the shower," I roll my eyes a little, what does she want?

"She wanted me to let you know that she and Haymitch convinced the president to let you have a few days rest but on Parcel day you must return to your duties." That's good, I never expected that. I'm only too happy to have a few days free of the camera. Subconsciously, my hand ghosts over the fading bruise on my cheek.

"However, in exchange, you and Peeta must be filmed longer than normal. Apparently, the Capitol citizens are so obsessed with your love story, they are demanding to see you both settling back into the fantastic life of a Victor." She says this with no sarcasm, almost like she actually believes it. Does she not realise that I've been a Victor for nearly a week and I already hate it. It confuses things and messes up your life, and I think that no matter how hard you try it will be nigh on impossible to get your old life back. I sigh.

"I see. I'll let Peeta know. Thanks mother." She stands up, a list in her tiny hands and puts it in my game bag, her eyes shining bright with tears. I suddenly feel bad, but it's not my fault, is it?

"It's no trouble Katniss. And if you can't get any of these things in town, please don't worry. Give my best regards to Hazelle." Tentatively, she steps forward; her arms open before she attaches herself to me, burying her face in my shoulder. I stand stiff for a few seconds, then force my body to relax and wrap my arms round her.

"Be safe." She whispers in my ear. I break away from her hug and smile gently.

"I will." Then I open the door and head out into town.

Author's Note: Tension in the Everdeen Household! I always go into more detail than I expect, but I really want to establish the struggling relations Katniss has with people, trying to adjust back to District life is not easy. She feels like she can only properly talk to Haymitch and Peeta, because they understand. How do you think Katniss's trip into town will go? And don't worry Gale fans, he will be re-entering the story soon, and I will try not to make him too mean and jealous. We all love their awesome brother and sister relationship! Again, really sorry about the delay in update, I'm so ashamed, I promise I will write more soon! Please read and review, they are greatly appreciated good or bad.

Lots of love,

Mjenney21 xxx