I do not Own Naruto or Akatsuki in any way possible.

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50 Review special!

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Stupid computer is shutting down.

Stupid School work getting in the way.

Stupid Tests getting in the way.

Stupid Akane needs to shut up and get to writing before this story gets delayed any longer.

And yes I did warn you about face palms, no?


The Akatsuki walked-No, trudged shamefully To the detention class after the school day was over. But the question was….

Where the hell is it?!

Ahh. Good question.

"According to the school map…" Itachi read the map that was attached to the wall of every hallway. "It's two hallways to the left, and…" He raised an eyebrow.

"7 hallways down."

Insert mental face-palm. (A/N: I warned you!! Hahah!)

"7?!" Konan's eyes looks like they were going to explode from their sockets.

"Alright. Let's get moving then." Pein ordered, continuing to stroll. On their third to last hallway, Hidan stopped mid track.

"I…" He started quietly. Everyone turned their attention to the Jashin worshipper.

"-Need to take s shit." He finished flatly.

Insert Anime fall.

"In this situation-no, you're not." Zetsu replied.

Hidan waved him off, "Too late." he headed off away from the group to take of his shitty business. Literally.

"We can leave him, un." Deidara sneered, hoping Hidan would somehow lock himself in some unknown closet again. The group continued to their destination as our lovely Hidan acted like a smartass.

Hidan's scavenger hunt

"Dammit-I don't know where the bathrooms are." he mumbled. The snow-haired male wondered around the school until he found the sign, Restrooms. He howled in victory, "Aha! I'm so smart!" He stood still with a grin on his face to be silently praised by Jashin. He looked at the two doors that had a male sign and a female sign.

He sighed, "Damn, which one is a guy?" he looked at the sign with a circle and an arrow pointing to the upper right direction. "Hmm…" Hidan then examined the circle with a cross sign below, and the arrow at the end of the vertical cross.

"Well that settles it." He replied to himself, after looking and thinking for a few minutes.

He walks through the door with the female sign.

Detention

"Alright~ this should be it." Deidara suggested, after turning their last hallway.

"Deidara-the room is down this hallway." Itachi pointed out. The blond-haired just snarled.

"Uchihas…" He opened the door--

During a prostate exam.

And to this day forward, no Deidaras had ever done what Deidara had did, until now.

He screamed like a little girl.


"Because I'm a girl," Konan started, "Doesn't mean you have to scream like one." Others snickered in agreement as Deidara turned away with his arms crossed, red as a tomato.

"I-It's…um-puberty?"

Insert. Face. Palm.

"Bull! You don't even know what a Scrotum is!" Kakuzu argued.

"Like you know either!" The clay freak replied in a mocking tone.

"-It's where you keep food!" Kisame butted in, smiling with his shark white teeth, lined up.

"No!-What? Really?" The oddly colored man nodded in reply.

"So, it's like a refrigerator?" Konan asked herself, "I'm so getting one then!"

"Get me one for my fertilizer." Zetsu added.

(A/N: Was me that me or did it almost make sense? Except they're both different concepts ahah!)

"Now this should be it." The raven-haired male mumbled, "-and please, don't do that again- you embarrassed yourself enough by miscounting your fingers." He opened the detention door.

It smelled like dead corpses.

It was dark, humid, and dusty.

Everything was literally made out of metal.

Oh, that's the concept of detention rooms alright.

"Sooo-" Sasori started, glancing around the room, "Where's the teacher?" The group entered the known territory, dust, and debris exploded gently beneath their feet, each time they took a step. Suddenly the door closed on them-with no light supple in the room.

"Hello there," a voice crept around the room, echoing through the stale walls.

They all spun around in the darkness, wondering who the hell could live in this.


"Dammit, where are the basins?! (Urine holes)"


"Detention on the first day?" Her soft, questioning voice sounded amused, "how unique."

"How long are we in here for?" Tobi asked, petrified at the scene.

"Not long…since it's your first-so it's an easy, half hour."

"Y-you're kind of in the shadows." Konan sweat dropped.

"Because we're in the dark, idiot." Deidara's voice entered.

KICK.

"Awwghh! You have such bad aim, Konan!" He whined, stomping on the ground in pain. She snorted.

"It was supposed to be there."

"Now, now children." her ginger voice came up again, "Let me just find the flashlight.." When she turned it on, she shined it on everyone.

"Sorry, I'm Mrs. Detention. Welcome."

Many couldn't believe their eyes. Her pale, wrinkly, soft, stretchy skin. Her wrinkly smile, her wrinkly…everything.

"You're….old?" Kisame slipped out. Pein bonked him on the head.

"You idiot, that's disrespectful."

"O-old?" Her wrinkle skin and her wrinkly lips frowned. "Are you calling me OLD?!" Her voice boomed. Kisame quickly shrunk into his seat as others followed.

"N-no, ma'am."

"MA'AM?" Her voice exploded again, "I'm a perfectly 24 year old lady!"

"WHAT!?!?" Everyone burst out, jumping from their seat. They quickly sat down again, not wanted to be pummeled down like Kisame who was close to.

"Is there something wrong with me being 24?" She asked, her voice changing from an elderly, soft, to boisterous and some 7 year old whining for some damn pixie sticks.

"No…" They echoed.

Sweat drop.

"Good…I shall add another half hour since it was so disrespectful." She went up to the board with her flashlight, screeching on the board, causing everyone to wince, "Welcome to Detention, boys and girls."

"Hah! She said guys first, Konan!"

"Don't push it Deidara." The blue-haired female seethed in the dark.

"I expect absolutely no tardiness starting TODAY. Good thing all of you guys made it on time." Everyone gulped, thinking the same thing.

Hidan's screwed.


I didn't know they didn't have basins…" Hidan grumbled after he walked out of the door, rubbing his stomach, "Oh well." He walked down luckily on the same hallway, and right all the way down where he saw some over-terrified guy in a corner in a white blanket, shivering…and nude. Hidan stopped and gave him a thumbs up.

"Good worshipping nude for Jashin! Keep it up!" he flashed a smile and continued strolling to a dark room. "Hmm?" He walked in out of all curiosity.

"-Good thing all of you guys made it on time." Mrs. Detention finished, and just as she did…

The door creep open, revealing a Hidan.

"Why the fuck is this room so fucking dark? And--What the shit!? Metal?"

"Why are you late?" Mrs. Detention seethed, shining the flashlight on him.

"Who the fuck are you?"

"…"

Everyone mentally gave themselves a face palm, and waited for the yelling to begin.

"DID YOU JUST CUSS?!"

"WHAT IF I FUCKING DID!?"

Face palm face palm face palm.


A/N Sorry again! Aha. Good thing I got off my butt. But that's part 1 for now! Of Mrs. Detention!

God I feel like a dumbass for not updating. Well--At least it's here!

Until next chapter hopefully!

Hehehehe...Deidara walking in on a prostate exam and Hidan walking in after.

~3/2/10~