I made this for you. c:
chars © Ckott
"Dylan, can I talk to you for a moment?"
"Sure, Alek. What's eatin' you?"
"Oh, it's not me. It's… a friend. Of mine."
"Oh, a friend?"
"Yes. You see, my friend has a bit of a problem, and I was hoping you could share your thoughts on it."
"He's on the ship?"
"Yes, he's on the ship. See, he's experiencing… inner stirrings."
"… Inner stirrings."
"Correct."
"Your friend is experiencing inner stirrings… Okay, aye, go on."
"Yes, well, he thinks he might be in love."
"In love?"
"Not so loud! But yes."
"But the only lass on this ship is the lady boffin! And she's married and insufferable!"
"Dylan, lower your voice!"
"Aye, sorry. But—"
"Just listen. That's the problem, you see. It's not a lady he has feelings for."
"Oh… OH."
"Exactly. My friend's very confused."
"Aye, your friend."
"Why do you keep saying it like that?"
"Like what?"
"Like it's in italics."
"It's the Glaswegian accent. So do you know who he has these stirrings for?"
"Well yes, but I'm not sure if I should tell you."
"You can tell me anything, Alek."
"Maybe not this…"
"Oh, so now you're good at keeping your haggis-hole shut."
"Pardon? I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. You were mumbling."
"It's nothing."
"Okay, well, I guess maybe if you knew, things could get resolved a little sooner…"
"Aye."
"You see, he has stirrings… well, he has feeling for you, Mr. Sharp. He figures."
"Huh."
"He could be wrong. Well, then again maybe not, since we're having this conversation."
"So these are strong feelings?"
"Yes, I suppose you could say so."
"Well… in that case, I have something to tell you too, Alek."
"Oh? Okay, I'm listening."
"I… I have feelings for you too."
"Oh."
"Wait, why are you looking at me like that?"
"This creates quite a conundrum. What will I tell Mr. Newkirk?"
"What does Newkirk have to do with this?"
"Our friend, Mr. Newkirk? I've been talking about him this entire time."
"What? You mean when you said friend you actually meant a barking friend?"
"Well of course. Does that mean something different in English? I suppose I could've gotten it confused with something else—I've never had an excuse to practice the word, you see."
"Well that's depressing."
"I generally am. So what do we do about this?"
"You can tell Newkirk he's not my type. I'll be uh… drawing women. With their ankles showing."
"God's wounds, Mr. Sharp! I'm sorry I ever doubted your masculinity!"
"Well, you sodding should be. I'll see you round then."
"Yes! Good jest, pretending you had inner stirrings for me."
"Yeah, it was barking hilarious."
Happy Thursday, y'all!
Cmdr, still working on your request! Sorry it's taking so long! School and work are surprisingly time consuming.
