They kissed in the hot water and felt each other, cleaning each other with a soapy sponge that Matsuri usually used for herself. They took 45 minutes stroking each other with their hands and the sponge. It was a night of utter euphoria.
The water was hot and nice. They had fallen in love with each other in the span of only a day and the shock had made it that much more extreme.
They couldn't let go of each other. All the time in the shower they were hugging and sucking on parts of each other, they liked experiencing each other's bodies.
They reached their hands down to the other's crotch and began rubbing, climaxing together just out of sight of the water so it wouldn't be too dry and used soap for lubrication.
They laughed together, tittering about their awkward situation, "When are we ever going to stop!?" Matsuri sighed into her girlfriend, breathing hard from her orgasm, "I don't know," replied Harumin, "I can't keep my eyes off you and my hands are connected to my brain, and that's nothing but static right now."
"I think I love you, I really do," said Harumin, her hands on Matsuri's shoulders, "Thanks Harumin, that means so much, it truly does," she hugged Harumin's breasts.
"Did you think you would do this with another woman?" asked Harumin in a shy way.
"Yes, honestly," smiled Matsuri. "I've always been kind of gay or bisexual. Did I tell you I kissed Mei one time?"
Harumin was surprised, "Whaaaat!? Haha, why!?" Matsuri laughed in return. "I was getting back at her for taking Yuzu from me. She got the better of me though, I set her up with one of my online friends and I was afraid Yuzu would hate me for it. But you know Yuzu, everybody just ended up being friends again."
"Mm-hm," Harumin said with sage understanding, "Yuzu is an amazing girl. I'm not surprised you were attracted to her."
"Yeah," replied Matsuri, "but I like you a little better than her now, obviously."
"Did you always know…" said Harumin, "that you wanted me or that I was maybe…" Matsuri hugged Harumin, "Yeah, sorry. I could tell that you were different and interesting. The way you dressed, the way you wore your hair. I thought I could have fun with you and I wasn't wrong. Plus, you were Yuzu's friend, and I've known her since I was a child. I always say, if they're good enough for Yuzu, they're more than good enough for this girl."
"You're good enough for me, Matsuri. I always thought you were a cute little thing. I liked having you as my friend. But I confess, my feelings for you didn't come to fruition until I found out Yuzu was…"
Matsuri felt her girlfriend's body in her arms, and the weird things that were going through her mind were telepathic right now, a chaotic spaghetti, "Yeah, it looks like we both got dumped. Yuzu is pretty great, I'm glad she's going to fight to stop this craziness and the arranged marriage."
"Me too."
Matsuri yawned, "It's time to go to bed, it's almost ten."
"Oh! You're right!" there was a clock on the wall showing 9:48 pm.
"You were incredible tonight and I'm never going to forget this for the rest of my life," said Harumin, "It was my first time and it was amazing."
"You read my mind," replied Matsuri sweetly.
"I can't believe we did all that stuff. I didn't think I'd know what to do, but I had enough of an idea when I saw you naked," Harumin said seductively. Matsuri smirked, Harumin went on, "I just did whatever I would do to myself, honestly. Whatever I thought you would like. I just kind of started with masturbation and theorized from there." Matsuri looked up, and they pecked each other on the lips nonchalantly.
They helped each other out of the shower gently, trying not to slip in the mess that they had made. They were drained. They toweled each other off, not allowing the other to do any drying or rubbing of their own body, including the crotch. They tried not to make it too sexy because then they would need another shower.
"Should we change your sheets do you think? Or…" Matsuri thought about it. "I suppose, I think I have another set."
They helped each other change Matsuri's bed's sheets without saying a word. When everything was clean, they looked down on the bed. They were still naked and had done everything noticing each other's bodies. "If we stay like this we'll get all horny again," said Matsuri. Harumin laughed out loud, "I know, right!"
Matsuri gave Harumin a clean pair of shorts that happened to be oversized because Matsuri liked big comfortable things that were baggy and street cool. "I'm really glad you had something in my size, Matty," Matsuri smiled, "I know! I was worried. But then you could've just slept naked with me after all, of course."
"What about a bra?" Matsuri shook her head, "I have a shirt though," and she gave her one of her rock n' roll shirts that said 'buzzingo' in yellow and black lettering with a lightning bolt. They were both wearing ridiculous bedtime clothes, but they helped mask the desire which was still intense. They looked each other over, "Thank God, I thought it was never going to end," said Matsuri ironically. "Oh yeah?" said Harumin, "What if I—" Matsuri interrupted her, "Don't even start the sex talk, please, my body can't take it." Harumin laughed, "Alright." But she did hold Matsuri's hand. "Which side should I sleep on?"
Matsuri looked at the bed, "Can you sleep next to the wall? You're pretty big, I'm afraid you'd smother me in my sleep." There was a giant railing on either side of the bed, so it would have been hard to exit or enter unless by the side, and the bed was stuffed against the corner of the room.
Harumin looked annoyed, "Okay, pipsqueak, probably nice on that side anyways. What if I have to pee during the night though?" Matsuri lowered her eyebrows, "Just climb over me. You've been climbing over me all day."
"Oh! Right!" Harumin blushed, embarrassed. She was asking stupid questions, she wanted to get to sleep too. She settled into bed and Matsuri filled in right behind her. Harumin was lying flat on her back, and Matsuri fiddled with her phone for the alarm. She knew she would have to wake them both up early tomorrow. "Did you tell your parents you were staying over at Yuzu's place like always?" asked Matsuri, "Yeah, it's the excuse that always works. Plus, they still think she's a bit off like she was forever since Mei left."
"Gotcha," replied Matsuri. They laid side by side in the bed. There was an electric pulse running through Matsuri now and she couldn't sleep. All the excitement made her pulse run. The girl she wanted to get with most was right next to her in her bed, arms touching hers, legs touching her legs. It was too much stimulation.
"It's hard to get to sleep like this," Harumin spoke first. "Yeah," replied Matsuri, "Harumin is right next to me in the bed I sleep in all by myself. I feel like I'm going to spaz out."
"Haha, oh Matsuri, that was a really cute thing to say."
"I mean it Harumin, I didn't think this would ever happen to me. You were the unattainable dream." Harumin smiled at her, "I think you're adorable, Matsuri. I thought you were annoying when we first met but you're a dedicated friend. You've always been there when I needed you, plus…I always thought you were kind of nice."
Just at that moment, something dug into Matsuri, a fleck of doubt. She grew listless and morose on her side of the bed, feeling isolated for some strange reason, from everything that she had known. She turned her body away from the girl next to her. 'What is this?' she thought. It was crawling all over her, this feeling of not wanting to ever let go. It invaded her consciousness. She wanted Harumin as a life partner, and Harumin seemed to be plainly underestimating all of this. She was treating it like a joke. "Harumin, how do you really feel about me though? Besides all the sex?"
Harumin was shocked, she got on her side to look Matsuri eye to eye, but the girl's head was turned away.
"Why was it me?" Matsuri asked. Harumin strolled her nails over Matsuri's arm awkwardly, trying to soothe her, "Are you wondering if this is real?" Matsuri frowned, "I don't know what I want. This is all so unbelievable. Earlier you were saying L-E-Z, and now we're both…L-E-Z."
Silence followed. Matsuri spoke up, "It isn't because of your sister, is it?" Harumin just kept her gaze on the girl, "I'm my own self, Matty. I like you, so I did what I did. I don't regret it at all." Harumin was silently starting to panic.
Matsuri was unsure about something, she turned over to look at Harumin. Harumin moved in to hold her, "Don't be worried Matty, don't question it. We don't have to tell Nene, we can still hang out with her if you want. We can even keep it from Yuzu for as long as you want to as well. After all, she didn't tell me about Mei for a long time. Are you having hetero doubts?"
Matsuri turned over and rubbed the side of the bed with her hand, stroking the clean sheet, "It's just all too good to feel true. I feel like I should have jumped through fire and fought a lion to get here with you. It was all too easy."
Harumin smiled, "I needed YOU, Matsuri. I wanted YOU. What about me? Maybe I stretched my hand out for support and didn't expect half so much love from you?" Matsuri's eyes grew wide. "You're way more mature about this stuff than me, Matsuri. I was having doubts today. What if it had been some other girl and she would've said it was weird and left me alone with my thoughts and I went home sad? What if I blew up at my sister and she had to leave home? What if we never spoke again. You're to thank for this, how this all turned out."
Matsuri was shocked and turned back around to look Harumin in the eyes. "I want you to need me, I really want you to need me. I neeeeeeeed you to need me, that would make me the happiest girl in the whole world, if you needed me, Harumin."
"Oh Matty, you didn't think I needed you? I chose to sleep with you," Matsuri started to tear up, "Oh, don't cry Matty," and she held her and hugged her. "You're too good for me!" cried Matsuri, "Nooo, noo. Maybe."
"Bitch," said Matsuri. "I'm sorry," said Harumin. "You're right, you're too good for me."
"Ugh," said Matsuri deeply into Harumin's chest, comforting herself there.
"Matsuri, I think you're beautiful," said Harumin and looked at Matsuri's swollen eyes, "You're pretty and adorable and I like you." Matsuri put her hands on the other girl's shoulders, "Do you think I'm… sexy?" Harumin furrowed her brows. "Matsuri, if you don't stop with this I'll take you out of bed, pull down your pants and spank you so hard!" "You're not my mother!" said Matsuri in a mocking tone. "Mmm," Harumin hugged Matsuri again. "You're somebody I chose to like, Matsuri. Cute as a button and you fit in my pocket, my calculator girlfriend."
"Uhhhh, never mind," said Matsuri in a huff. She turned over again and clicked off the light, "Good night."
Harumin sat silently for a while on her back, not getting to sleep yet. She put the back of her hand to her forehead. She didn't know how to make Matsuri understand their relationship and get over her insecurity. She liked Matsuri, everyone thought she was a good girl, mischievous but good all the same. But how was she special, and most of all special to her? What set her apart?
Her pink hair and petite body were a plus. She was smart, attractive, had good grades, a bright future, bad family and home life but that wasn't her fault. She thought of all the times she had played with Matsuri, trivial things like grabbing and touching her. She had emotional intelligence, and Harumin meanwhile could barely speak a word to her sister.
Harumin on the other hand had a more mature body, bigger breasts and a bigger butt, she was taller, heavier. All of that made her different and distinctive. She liked Matsuri for her intelligence and being herself. Harumin was awkward where Matsuri excelled, good at games and having fun, she cared about others and friends. But why did Harumin fall for Matsuri?
Matsuri was still hanging out, not quite asleep. This was stressing Harumin out, why did she need a reason to like Matsuri? Why did she need to justify their falling for each other? Why did Matsuri like her? She was a weirdo Gyaru who only had middling grades and a middling future of her own. Matsuri could be anything if she put her mind to it.
She rolled over and looked at the wall, "Matsuri, don't you love me?" Matsuri kept her position, "Yes, Harumin, I do."
"Do you believe that I do?"
"If you say so."
"Are you afraid there isn't anything more to our relationship than a physical one?"
Matsuri's ears perked up, she didn't know what to say. "Are you afraid we don't really get along and you were just a side girl instead of Yuzu?"
Matsuri's eyes opened wide. "No, I-"
Harumi lay on top of her and put her finger to her lips. "I like Yuzu as a friend, I'm satisfied with that. It was like a passing whim; trains in the night passing each other, not making a connection." Matsuri lifted a brow in interest, "But we met in the night and we made a connection. Why do we need justification for that?" Harumin asked.
Matsuri was starting to melt. "I'm afraid you don't love me the same way that I love you, I know it," said Matsuri. Harumin held Matsuri's hand with two of her own, "It's fine to feel insecure. Do you want to go on a date or two before we sleep together again, so you can think about it?"
Matsuri looked to the side, "I don't want to hurt you, Harumin."
"I know." She cupped her cheeks, Harumin loved cradling Matsuri's intelligent head in her hands, "If physical love doesn't prove it, and our emotional relationship hasn't gone far enough for you, then I can go further."
Matsuri sat up, Harumin was mildly surprised, "Harumin, what do you like?"
"Hmm." She thought to herself, "I like hazelnut ice cream. I like bad dramas on the weekday. I like Gyaru clothes and dressing up in big outfits that look kind of slutty and pretty too."
Matsuri listened, then responded, "I like skateboard culture, big hats, rock t-shirts, tennis shoes and sloppy jeans." She thought a little more, "I like to go out with friends and talk with them and have fun. I think I like…to manipulate people who aren't paying attention to me."
Harumin laughed a little, "That's well understood, Matty—" Matsuri looked down on her friend, "I really like it when you call me Matty, and I like it when I get to call you Haru." Harumin smiled.
"I like hanging out with you guys, but I have an extreme attraction for you, Harumin. You were the prize I couldn't imagine having. You have a great body and succulent breasts, and I admire your Gyaru style. I wanted to be all over you like a cheap coat. But you do confuse me."
"Yes?"
"I can't help it. It's like there's something always holding you back, or there was. Until perhaps Yuzu told you she was gay. Like you weren't comfortable with or accepting of yourself."
Harumin meant to step in, "—but not being a Gyaru, I mean being yourself. It's like Gyaru is hiding from something in yourself."
Harumin stroked Matsuri's pants, "I'm afraid." "Of what?" responded Matsuri. She was going to get to the bottom of this if they stayed up all night, "Are you afraid of who you are?"
Harumin looked up at the ceiling, "My sister was always so dominating. Gyaru was a way for me to distinguish myself. Yuzu is so brave and I'm so cowardly. I believed in Yuzu, and her belief that she would find a boyfriend, and that we would hang out in between dates. Maybe I always wanted Yuzu."
She was drawing arabesques in the air, letting her mind wander, "She was my escape hatch and my hope. Now I have to live in the real world, and everything came crashing down all at once. And you were there. It couldn't have been Nene because she's not as mature as you, but you're so street smart. I was immediately attracted to that, even if I didn't understand worldliness."
Matsuri stayed silent. "I've looked up to you, in a way." Matsuri was surprised, "You're so emotionally resonant that you know everything about what's going on in relationships, like Yuzu's. You were there when it began." She looked sad now. "I was bitter about being left out of Yuzu's life."
She looked up at Matsuri, "So I looked to you for some guiding light, and you provided it, at last. I mean, the arcade is fun, it's not really my scene." She sighed, "I was so lonely for a long time, so I've gravitated towards you, so strongly. She held onto Matsuri's pants with her clawing, nailed hand. "I needed you."
"We all need somebody, Harumin."
Harumin started to tear up, "It's okay to be L-E-Z, Haru. It's okay if you want or need to be L-E-Z with me." She touched her shoulder. "You want to be L-E-Z with me? Do you want to be in a relationship?"
Harumin stared blankly at her. She didn't understand relationships or friendships all that well. She thought she was already in one because of tonight but this was another barrier to entry. Just when she thought she was free of strings…
"Matsuri, please, you're so much smarter about this stuff than I am. If you put me on the spot, then I don't know how to respond. I know how to be dignified but I don't know how to live undignified, it's making me jealous of you."
Matsuri's eyes widened, "Yes, I could always tell that. Sorry, Haru, I'm being really insistent in this, it's my nature."
"It's like you're asking whether or why I love you? Can a person help that? Do you think I'm a fake?" A tear sprung down her cheek.
"I'm really a novice as well, Haru. You give me too much credit. I guess it's that tonight feels important to me and I don't want to let it go, I don't want to sleep. It's such a point in my life where I want to investigate these feelings until I can understand them."
Harumin looked up at the ceiling, looking for patterns in the dry wall. "I think I love you, Matsuri," Harumin put her hands to her eyes and cried, "I think I really really love you and it just happened over time. Something about you really got to me. But as soon as my other NorthStar failed me and it was certain, that's when it appeared to me. Maybe I started kissing you tonight out of misery and suffering, but as it went further—I wouldn't have let it go any further if you hadn't answered willingly or I hadn't felt sure and calm of ease."
Matsuri felt bad now for pushing things like this. She was being a bastard after this amazing night. "What Yuzu said filled me with hurt. She isn't going to have any time for me anymore." Harumin was openly weeping, covering her face and facing the wall away from Matsuri. "I love you. I couldn't see it all this time because I was living in a fantasy, I'm sorry I couldn't see it." Now even Matsuri was crying.
"But why, how could you fall in love with me?"
Harumin cried harder, "I don't know it just happened."
"That's no excuse Haru, why me?"
Harumin looked up from her hands, swollen puffy eyes red and wet with tears. "Why?"
Matsuri waited in silence. "Because you're a beautiful person, and I wanted to be with you." Matsuri's eyes widened again and fell to a dead look. "Why…"
Harumin got up, and she hugged Matsuri, pulling her up from the bed. "Why is it so hard to believe, Matty?" She held her endearingly and fondly. "Why can't you be loved? Why is it impossible to dream that I love you?" Matsuri was now balling into her chest.
"Little one, don't feel scared, mama Haru is here to saved you from this anguish you have for yourself."
"I don't understand!" cried Matsuri through muffled cries, "Why me!? Why do I deserve this?"
Harumin hugged her tightly, "Because you're you, and I can't replace you." Matsuri's eyes opened wide, she stopped, barely holding it back, sat up out of Harumin's chest and looked into her eyes. "You really like me?" she said.
Harumin kissed her. They kissed for a minute, closed then open, unintelligibly because of their raw emotions. "You, I want you, Matty. I want you, I want to be together with you. If you're afraid we won't have intimacy, then let's go on a date!" They were hugging. "I want to go on a date with you," replied Matsuri, "I want to go on the super cutest date we can both imagine. I'll do up my hair and wear my best outfit. I'll dress clean and nice for you and be as good as possible."
"Don't change for me, Matsuri. I like you as you are."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Okay Harumin," she said after a while, "I'll leave it there for tonight. We'll go on some dates and stay away from physical stuff for a while, maybe just hold hands. Let's see if this relationship has legs."
"I wouldn't want to use you, Matsuri. You're too important and special for that. I know, I'm your friend."
They both hugged tightly and fell to their respective sides of the bed and fell asleep for the night.
