Disclaimer: Never owned it, never will.
Chapter 11
Sasuke
I was sleeping soundly until I felt someone hit me with a pillow.
"Ugh!" I groaned, clutching my head. I rolled off the bed, landing onto the carpeted floor with a low thud.
"What the hell was that for?!" I groaned. My hangover was not giving me any mercy today.
"You bastard!" Neji yelled, red in the face. He hit me with the pillow again.
"What. The fuck. Is. Your problem?" I growled, snatching the pillow away. Why was he hitting me with a pillow, anyway? I didn't know he was into pillow fights. Maybe he was gay…
Oh, crap, I have a gay roommate. Good thing it's not for long…
"You got my cousin drunk!" He yelled again, "You asshole!"
Then I remembered…I got Yuhi…Hinata, drunk. Drinking contest. I was about to take her to her room and…oh, Kami. Now I know why he's trying to kill me.
What was I going to say? I'm sorry I got your cousin drunk and almost had sex with her in your bed? That would get me ten feet under.
"What do you have to say for yourself?" Neji hit me with his pillow again.
"Are you gay?!" I exclaimed, "Stop with the fucking pillow!"
"I'm not allowed to cause physical harm, bastard," He growled, "You're lucky the pillow isn't filled with knives!"
It almost scared me how sadistic Yuhi's former cousin was.
Temari
"Aw, man, not again!" Ino groaned. "Now I know Hina-chan's life is better than mine!"
I rolled my eyes.
"Why, Kami, why?!" Hinata wailed, sinking back into her pillow, "Why did it have to be the Emo Duckbutt?! Why not his brother?! The older, hotter brother!"
My eye twitched.
"It was hilarious to see!" Tenten laughed, "They were gonna do it in Neji's bed!"
My eye twitched even more. This was not helping the slight hangover I had. No one decided to mention that the water was spiked, too. Damnit, I knew not to trust Ino when she said "Girl Scout's Honor". She was never a Girl Scout!
Everyone's hangover was seemingly forgotten – except mine, of course, I was the only sane one here.
"Okay, Hina," I took a deep breath, "Just tell me, detail by detail, what happened. I don't wanna overreact or anything."
Or get a heart attack. I don't need to get checked into the hospital anytime soon.
Hinata took a deep breath before beginning.
"Well, I left Neji and Tenten at our room," Hinata began, "And suddenly the Emo Duckbutt shows up and starts saying I can't hold my liquor, and I got all mad and –"
"But you can't hold your liquor, Hina-chan." I interrupted.
"And he challenged me to a drinking contest," She ignored me, and then she frowned, "I got to twenty-five shots. I almost beat his record! Only five more shots and I had to pass out!"
My eye twitched uncontrollably now.
"Um, Tema, is something wrong with your eye?" Ino asked worriedly, examining my eye, "It doesn't look so good. It's twitching and everything."
"Of course it's twitching, Ino," I muttered, standing up. "I'll be right back."
I could indistinctly hear Hinata cursing the Emo Duckbutt, wondering why she couldn't get drunk with Itachi-sensei. My eye twitched even more.
I banged on Neji's door, not caring if any of them had a hangover. I was pissed.
"Open up, Neji! I know you two are in there!"
"What?" Neji was irritated.
"Where's the Duckbutt?"
He smirked, letting me in.
I grabbed a random textbook from a backpack, eyeing the slouching Duckbutt on the side of his bed.
"Asshole!" I yelled, hitting him with my textbook, "What's your problem, you idiot?! Where'd you even get the sake, you Duckbutt?!"
"Would you leave me the hell alone?! I didn't do anything!"
"The hell you didn't!" I scoffed, hitting him with the heavy textbook again, "What were you thinking?! You are so lucky Neji caught you!"
"I'm not, trust me," Neji coughed quietly, "I'm scarred."
I glared at him, mentally telling him to either agree with me or to shut the hell up.
"Women are so PMS-y," He muttered.
I ignored him, hitting Sasuke with the textbook again.
He groaned, rubbing his head.
"I bet you wish you didn't get Hina drunk now, huh, Emo Duckbutt?" I smirked.
"Don't. Call. Me. That."
"You don't seem to have a problem when Hinata calls you an Emo Duckbutt."
"Go away."
"Yuhi?" A new voice said from the hallway.
"Shika?" I asked, confused, "What's up?"
"Well…I was going to ask you to lunch…but right now I'm wondering what the hell you're doing hitting the Uchiha with a textbook."
"You want to go to lunch?" I asked, surprised.
"Wanna?"
"Yeah. Sure," I smiled, walking over to him.
"Hey, my textbook! Give it back, Yuhi!"
I threw it back at Sasuke, knowing that with my perfect aim, I'd hit him in the head.
I smirked when I heard him groan.
"Women are lethal," Shikamaru muttered, chuckling, "Especially you."
I shrugged.
"It's a gift."
Sasuke
"You…got Hinata drunk?" Itachi asked, eyebrow raised.
"If you're going to hit me, I swear I'll to hurt you."
"Amusing. How many people have caused you bodily harm today?"
"A few."
First there was Neji; thank you, Kami, for him being gay and not hitting me with anything harder than a pillow.
Then there was that overprotective sister of hers. Jeez, what's her problem? I'd be lucky if I didn't get a concussion from the beating she gave me.
And then Naruto. What he had to do with Hinata was unknown to me. But he would not stop hitting me over the head. Whatever gave him the courage to touch me was something I'd have to discern.
Gaara. He'd done it quietly. Tripped me three times today.
Tenten. She just kicked me for the fun of it, I'm sure.
"Even more amusing. But tell me again why you got her drunk."
"There wasn't anything else to do. I sure as hell didn't feel like going to the party. Especially with who the chaperones were going to be. Especially you."
"I'm offended, Otousan. Truly."
"Good." I paused. "What is your interest with Yuhi."
"None."
"I'm not stupid, Aniki," I scoffed, "I know she's of some interest to you. I don't care, to be honest, I'm just curious."
"She is a Hyuuga," He shrugged lightly, "The true heiress to the Hyuuga company."
"Nani?"
"You think you're smart, but it's unbelievable at how you missed that," He sighed.
I growled, leaning back in my chair while Itachi relaxed on his bed, doing some extra homework.
"What are you planning?" I repeated.
"You claim to be a prodigy," he shrugged, "You figure it out."
I growled. Today was surely not my day.
The next day
Hinata
I twirled around in the new uniform, eyeing myself in the mirror. With the school now a coed one, the two principals decided it would be appropriate for uniforms.
It wasn't that bad, to be honest; it was a black knee-length skirt, with a white strip a few inches above the knee, and one more stripe at the hip. There was the Konoha Leaf on the corner of the skirt, just above the bottom stripe. As for the shirt, it was a white polo shirt with three black buttons and the Konoha Leaf on the right shoulder. It was a bit small; no doubt Ino was at fault…her and her sneaky ways…
I tied my hair up in a ponytail with a black ribbon, letting some bangs frame my face. I eyed my eyes in distaste; I really felt like getting some contact lenses.
"Aw, you look so cute, Hina!" Ino cooed. She was in the exact same outfit, though her shirt was much smaller, and the skirt was folded up a few inches above her knee.
"Thanks, Ino-chan," I smiled, "Help me get my suitcases; I still need to get them to the lounge."
The whole school was being relocated, which meant new roommates. I was just fine with my room, but then again, do I really want the Emo Duckbutt living a few doors down? No, no I do not.
"Yeah, sure, Hina-chan," Ino nodded, "Hey, Naruto!"
Naruto's head popped into the room.
"Yeah?"
"Be a man and get Hina's luggage to the lounge, please," Ino asked sweetly.
"What? No! You're treating me like a slave! I already got you your luggage and Tenten's!"
"Fine, be a wimp," Ino rolled her eyes, "I'm sure us women can do this without your wimpy self!"
"NO! I AM NOT A WIMP! GIMME THE LUGGAGE, INO-CHAN!"
Naruto ended up leaving with all three of my suitcases in hand.
"Ah," Ino sighed, smirking, "The power of reverse psychology."
I sweat dropped. "That's not really what I meant by help, you know."
"Hey, you didn't say how I could help, Hina-chan!"
I rolled my eyes, smiling despite myself.
"Come on, Ino-chan," I chuckled, "Let's get to class."
"Class, here are your room numbers. Please come up and get them when I call your name."
"I hope we get the same dorm," Tenten hoped quietly.
"Me too," I agreed.
"Hina-chan!" Sakura's shrill voice screeched. I refrained from flinching.
"Hello, Sakura-san," I smiled.
"Call me 'chan', Hina!" She grinned. "Do you know what class Sasuke-kun is?"
"Um…not this one, sorry," I apologized, inwardly cringing at the mention of the Emo Duckbutt. "I think he's in Jiraiya's homeroom, though."
"Ah, well, thanks!" She smiled, "I have got to get into his class!"
Okay, why does the Emo Duckbutt have so many fan girls? Really, what's so good about him? Sure he's cute…hot…snappy dresser…but he's a totally Emo Duckbutt with a sour attitude.
He's a hot Emo Duckbutt…A little voice in my head said.
Hey! You shut up! I scowled inwardly.
I'm you. So technically, you're telling yourself to shut up.
Shut up! Grrr!
You're growling at yourself…The voice trailed off. I wish there was a way to get a hot guy as a roommate.
Gah! Who are you?! I thought.
I'm you…well…your other side.
And that is? I thought to myself.
Well…you know…the perverted side, It replied nonchalantly.
"What?!" I exclaimed.
"Yuhi Hinata?" Iruka's eyebrow rose.
"Um…nothing!" I squeaked.
"Well…okay…here is your room number," He placed a slip of paper on my desk facedown.
Way to go, Einsteinette.
"What's your room number, Hina?" Ino asked eagerly, "I'm room 1735."
"No way!" Tenten huffed, "I'm not with you! I'm room 1856."
"I'm room 1678," Temari shrugged, "You?"
I turned over the slip.
"Room 1543." I sighed, "That sucks. I'm not rooming with any of you."
"Damn." Ino muttered, "It'd be so awesome if I was with you. You could give me tips on how to do what you do?"
"Do what?" I was puzzled.
"You know, almost get laid," She smirked, "Gosh, you're really advanced. Way past me."
"INO!" I kicked her under the table.
"OW!"
"Ladies," Iruka warned, "Quiet down."
"Sorry, Iruka-sensei," I murmured. Ino ignored the warning.
"Your luggage should be placed in your rooms by lunch. Please make sure your luggage is correct when you find them."
Gosh, you sure are loud…I wonder if you are when you –
That's it! SHUT THE HELL UP!
Sorry, It said.
-x-
The luggage was in my room by lunchtime. The bed looked so comfortable, and I was exhausted. Especially when I found out I had a voice inside my head. A perverted one.
Hello, schizophrenic idiot.
My name's Riley, you know. It said, I refused to be called an It.
My eye twitched. The little voice in my head had a name, too.
I sighed; maybe if I took a nap It would be gone?
Name's Riley, Hina-chan!
You're ME!
Well, no other way than to try, right?
No one's POV
Sasuke was glad that the day was finally over. He did not like the fact that he had so many fan girls. At least he'd get his exercise.
He entered 1543, finding his luggage by the door. There was a sleeping body already in one of the beds. It seemed like they were sleeping for a while – probably during lunch.
A pale hand was hanging from the edge of the bed, feet dangling from another side of the bed.
Sasuke was curious as to who his roommate was, so he lifted the cover. His eyes widened.
The figure groaned a little, then sat up and stretched, looking at the alarm clock beside the bed.
"Shit! I overslept!" Her female voice cursed. Then she stiffened.
Hinata saw a white polo shirt in the corner of her eye. She got out of the bed and turned to face her new roommate.
Only to turn pale and wish she hadn't gotten out of bed.
Sasuke saw that Hinata's hair was a bit messed up. Her skirt was riding up her legs, and her shirt was a bit disheveled. A perverted thought lingered before Sasuke pushed it away.
He smirked instead, knowing his exhausting day was turning out for the better.
"Oh…no…" Hinata muttered.
Not good.
"NO FUCKING WAY!"
Thud.
Sasuke peered over the bed. It was definite that she'd fainted.
Oh, how the unconscious Hinata wished she were dead.
And how the little voice inside her head, Riley, was getting a kick outta this.
Sasuke's smirk widened. His school year just got a hell of a lot better.
Author's Note: Okay, personally, not the best chapter. It sounded way better in my head. But anyway, I hope you liked it (even if I didn't) and I hope you review!
