PART ONE CHAPTER TWELVE
THE ONE WHERE BUMPER TURNS 30
"Alright people! We're done!" Aubrey clapped twice, halting everyone's movement as they turned and awaited her further instructions. She beamed brightly at everyone, happy that the place was finally set up and ready to go.
She walked over to Beca and nodded, "Becs and I are heading to the airport to pick up Bumper. He's already expecting us. Jesse, you'll stay here to welcome the guests; Chloe – make sure the food is piping hot when we get back!" The blonde then looked around and frowned.
"Where's Luke?"
"Oh my gosh, Luke Posen! You naughty boy!" Stacie moaned, gathering the white sheets into her fists as she arched her back.
Luke looked up from his ministrations and grinned devilishly. "Enjoyed that, m'lady?"
Stacie smirked. "It's not bad."
The brunette watched the blonde man slowly crawl up the length of her body towards her; her dark green eyes swept between his own light blues orbs and his lips. Luke smiled as he dropped down slowly to close the gap, only to frown when his lips caressed her cheek instead.
"Seriously, Stacie?"
"Luke, you know I don't do that."
"It's just kissing." The brunette shook her head, sitting up and pushing the blonde man away at the same time. She stood up to gather her clothes, pulling her brown locks back into a messy ponytail. Luke rolled his eyes in frustration, but handed over her bra anyway.
When she was dressed, the brunette turned around and gave him a peck on his forehead, smiling as she pulled away.
"You're an amazing lover, Luke. I'll see you at the party later."
"Will you stop that?"
Beca frowned, removing her hand from the dials and crossing her arms. "Your music is boring the life out of me."
"The other stations won't play, Becs. It's not like I want to listen to Beethoven all the time." The blonde retorted, pulling into a parking lot. She turned off the engine and faced the brunette. "Beca."
Her serious tone caught Beca off guard as she slid her seatbelt off of her. She spun around to see a sad blonde gazing back at her. "Aubrey?"
"Don't mention anything about the party to Bumper later."
"I won't. I'm not stupid, Aub. It's a surprise party, isn't it?"
Aubrey sighed, rubbing her temples. "Yes, but there's more to that. Bumper...he never celebrates his birthdays."
"Is this the only time you guys remember his birthday? That's so not in the friendship code, Posen."
"No! Of course we celebrate each other's birthdays. Bumper is... unique."
The brunette arched her eyebrows and nudged Aubrey in her arm to continue. When the blonde remained silent and pensive, Beca spoke up.
"Something happened on that day, right?" Aubrey nodded, sliding her seatbelt off and opening the car door.
"Come on, Becs. Let's go. Just thought I should give you a heads-up in case..." Her voice trailed off as she stared ahead at the airport complex in front of them.
"Don't worry, Aub. I'm sure Bumper will be fine." The brunette grabbed her hand and pulled her towards the arrival hall. I certainly hope so, Mitchell. The blonde thought to herself as a gust of cold air hit her face when the sliding doors opened.
"Hi, welcome to Bumper's 30th! He's on his way and will be here in a few. I'd like to thank all of you for coming here tonight. As you know, it's a surprise so I've got to give you guys some instructions." Jesse spoke into the mic, gaining everyone's attention.
Almost every person on the guest list had arrived and were mingling around the cocktail station. Chloe motioned for the brunette to continue without waiting for the last guest. He nodded.
"Okay, I need you to hide along the side, near the parapet with all these poppers. When Bumper arrives, you guys would pull the string, let it pop, and yell Happy Birthday at our big man." A few Okays and Alrights chorused amongst the crowd as they acknowledged the simple instructions.
Luke stood nearby, sipping his daiquiri when he felt someone lean against him. Stacie threw him a wink and drank her lychee martini.
"Cool party."
When the blonde man did not reply, the brunette turned to face him. "Hey are you alright? You still upset?"
"I-"
"-Friends with benefits. I've set the ground rules – you've accepted them. No turning back now, Posen." she cut him off coolly, sauntering off towards a group of men who had been ogling at her.
Luke watched as pangs of jealousy hit him in the core. He quickly downed his drink and walked the other direction to greet a group of ladies he'd never met.
"How you doin'?"
"There he is!" Beca jumped and pointed at a stocky brunette standing not far away. A wide grin was plastered on his face as he took in the sight of the two beautiful women running his way.
"Wow, didn't know you're so popular with the ladies, Bump!" Donald nudged him in the ribs, earning himself a glare from his manager.
"Hey ladies! You're here. Meet my boys-" Bumper turned around and gave the band a "Don't you do or say anything funny" stare. "Donald, Jason, Unicycle, Benji and Greg."
"Hi guys!" Aubrey smiled and winked.
"Hi..." they replied in unison; their eyes dreamy as they took in the blonde's good looks and seductive smile. Bumper discreetly cleared his throat.
"Alright, let's go home. You boys, have fun on your way back. Don't drink and drive!" He wagged his finger in a menacing way at them before wrapping his arms around the women's shoulders.
"Okay boss! Happy birthday, Bumper!" the boys chorused after them.
Beca felt his arm tense and tightened around her shoulder. She exchanged dark looks with Aubrey.
"Let's- Let's go home, girls. I'm tired." Bumper stammered, throwing his bags into the trunk before clambering into the backseat.
Jesse slid his cell phone into his back pocket and glanced around the crowd. He found Chloe and quickly made his way over.
"They'll be here in five. Do we have everyone?" The redhead shook her head.
"We're still missing Fa-"
"-Hello, hello! What's a party without Fat Amy!" A loud voice boomed across the terrace and everyone cheered. Some of them recognized the comedian from Club Hyena and jostled forward to greet their comedic idol.
"You're Fat Amy?" Chloe asked, reaching the broad blonde who was busy signing some of her fans' t-shirts.
"Heck yes, ginger. Man, I didn't know I have fans!"
Chloe smiled, passing her a glass of Long Island Iced Tea. "I hope this will help you get the party started, Fat Amy." The blonde grinned in kind and downed the drink, causing Chloe to drop her jaw in surprise.
"Woah, that's... pretty cool."
"Yeah, I'm the best drinker in Tasmania, with these," Fat Amy gestured at her chest and winked. Chloe felt herself blushing at her words.
"Okay, well, enjoy yourself. We're expecting Bumper in a few minutes."
"They're here! Everyone into position!" Jesse screamed, waving around madly. He held onto the door knob, his ear pressed against the wooden panel. He lifted his other hand and gestured the countdown.
"3, 2, 1 – HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUMPER!"
The stocky man froze; his eyes bulged and his jaw dropped forming an oval shape. Both Aubrey and Beca nudged him forward as Jesse pushed a cart over with a huge cake set on it. He spun around to face his friends – the look in his eyes demanding an explanation.
Aubrey gave him a small smile as she replied, "We love you so much, Bumper. We know you don't dig birthdays but hey, it's your 30th and your gig was so successful! Just relax for tonight and simply enjoy yourself, will you?"
Beca nodded her agreement eagerly. The stocky man thought for moment before slumping his tense shoulders.
He turned back to all his friends and guests, waving his hands around. "Thanks guys!"
"Just blow out the candles and get this party started!" Chloe gushed, pulling out her camera.
"1, 2, 3!" He blew hard, extinguishing all 30 candles on the enormous cake.
A while later...
"Pint size!"
Beca spun around and smiled at her Australian friend. She clumsily grabbed and tugged Bumper over and motioned between the two. "Bump, meet Fat Amy. Fat Amy, this is Bumper."
The broad blonde threw a wink in his direction and cooed. "So, this is the famous Bumper Allen – star of the night."
A flush crept up his neck as he loosened the button around his collar. Beca noticed and giggled, pushing the man towards her friend causing them to collide and spill their drinks.
"Beca!"
She continued to laugh, turning to walk away. Before she was far enough, she felt a pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist.
"Becs, you're drunk." Jesse said, pulling her to stand upright. Aubrey was standing next to him with worry etched on her face. The two friends watched as the brunette glanced around the party, fixing her navy blue eyes on a certain redhead who was setting up her gear on the makeshift stage.
"I'm fine, I'm fine." She waved her arm around, breaking away from Jesse as she stumbled over to the drinks station.
"Keep a close eye on her, Jesse." Aubrey mumbled, striding off to talk with the guests. The brunette nodded, lifting his cup to take a drink of his Lime Vodka when his eyes fell on the redhead.
Chloe stood behind the mic and smiled brightly at the crowd.
"Hi people. I'd just like to thank you guys for being here; you have all been absolutely wonderful guests. Bumper," she pointed at her friend who was smiling ear to ear, "you're so awesome. I want you to know that. I'm so glad we get to celebrate this day with you. Here's a song for you and I hope you like it."
She lifted her hands over the keyboard and pressed down. The familiar melody of Lenka's Everything At Once rang through the air and everyone started bobbing their heads to the beat; some were tapping on the floor with their feet whilst the rest started moving their bodies to the rhythm.
Jesse managed to locate Beca who was bent over an ice bucket and playing with its contents. She picked up a piece of ice cube and grasped it in her palm, squeezing it – watching the icy clear liquid flow through the gaps between her fingers and drip back into the bucket. Jesse sighed and heaved her onto her feet.
"Come on, Becs. Let's join the party."
"Party?"
He nodded, supporting her as they hobbled back to the crowd to where Bumper was standing. By now, everyone was dancing. Beca glanced around and smiled – all of her worries and cares gone as she lifted her arms and started flailing them around. Jesse and Bumper looked at her for a moment before joining in – bobbing their heads up and down and wriggling their shoulders. Aubrey and Luke joined in a few moments later, each shaking and bouncing their bodies to the beat of Chloe's song.
The redhead herself had spotted her gang in the midst of the crowd and laughed at their silly antics. Her cerulean eyes fell on Beca and her heart pang with an unfamiliar ache when she saw a man dancing up to her friend and placing his hands on her waist. The redhead quickly averted her eyes and continued her singing, choosing to look elsewhere.
She did not see Beca pushing the stranger away and kicking him in his shins; she did not see Bumper holding the short brunette back whilst the rest of their friends tried to appease the man who was hopping around in pain. She did not see Beca casting her one last look before Bumper pushed her through the door to head back to their apartment.
"Let me go!" She screeched, grabbing blindly at the hands that were firmly clasped around her shoulders. Bumper frowned and held her still, gently guiding her into her apartment before closing the door.
"Beca." He chided, fetching a glass of water from the kitchen. The short brunette took the glass and downed the liquid.
Bumper sat down on the coffee table to face her. He studied her mascara-streaked face and shook his head.
"Why are you doing this, Beca?"
"I'm sorry, Bumper. I don't mean to be like this." She slurred, placing the glass down on the table but missed, sending it crashing to the floor. "Oops!"
The crowd exploded in cheers as the song ended. Chloe smiled and bowed, switching off the keyboard as she stepped off the stage. Her friends greeted her and Aubrey passed her a plate of food.
"Eat. You haven't eaten since lunch."
"Thanks Bree. Where's Beca?"
"With Bumper. She's pretty tipsy."
Chloe snorted, munching on a chicken wing. "Yeah I could tell. Where's that man she's with?"
"Man?" Luke and Jesse raised their eyebrows. "You mean the one whom she kicked?"
The redhead nearly choked on her wing. "She kicked? I thought she was hooking up with him?"
Aubrey shook her head and motioned for her friends to head over to a quieter corner. "We're pretty sure that did not happen." She said, glancing up at Chloe who looked slightly confused.
The redhead opened her mouth to speak when she felt her cell phone vibrating. She quickly passed her plate to her best friend and wiped her hands against the back of her jeans.
"Sorry I've got to take this." She frowned when she saw the caller ID. "Beca?"
"I like her so much! She occupies every single of my thoughts. When I wake up, the first person in my mind is her; when I eat, I wonder where she is and what she's having – or if she's eating at all; when I recorded my mixes, I had every song planned with her in mind; when I go out shopping, I wonder if she would like that pair of shoes or that handbag... When I go to sleep," Beca exhaled, blanketing her eyes with her forearm, "the last person on my mind is that redhead. That beautiful, most wonderful redhead."
Bumper listened quietly as he swept and cleaned up the glass shards.
"Beca... Why are you keeping this all to yourself? Don't you think she deserves to know?"
The short brunette sat up straight at his words. "You're right. She never knew. I haven't got a chance to tell her."
Bumper nodded, getting up to throw the broken glass away. Beca slipped her hand into her pocket and retrieved her phone. She was about to press speed dial when she paused and frowned.
"But she's with that Jamie."
"Who's Jamie?"
"That redheaded idiot who was in the party earlier, dancing close to the stage."
"That one? Beca, he looks uber ga-"
"-Who am I kidding, Bumper? Chloe and I – she won't ever have feelings for me. Oh my gosh. I'm such an idiot!" The brunette stood up and staggered over to the fridge, retrieving a small bottle of vodka. "Every time I've tried to tell her, I get cut off! It's like, she never wanted to know or there's someone up there who hates me too much to let me speak."
"Becs, that's enough alcohol for tonight. Give me the- ah crap." Bumper watched on helplessly as his friend emptied the entire bottle into her mouth. She then flung the glass into sink, smirking when it shattered.
"There," she pointed at the broken glass, "that's my broken heart right there. All shattered, my friend. I should have fled from her when I've had the chance to."
"Becs..."
Tears were now gushing down her cheeks and Beca couldn't be bothered to wipe them away. She peered at the stocky brunette and laughed bitterly; her cell phone clasped tightly in her hand. Her heart throbbed as her emotions went into overdrive.
"I should have... I should have left when I had the chance to!" Her voice suddenly becoming louder as she ran towards her room, shutting Bumper out. She wasn't going to push down her frustrations and her jealousy anymore.
The man rapped on her door, worry written all over his face when he heard a lamp crash behind the door. "Beca!"
Inside, Beca threw herself on the bed and pressed 1 on speed-dial. She waited.
"Beca! Just tell her how you feel! Please don't hurt yourself. Sit down with Chloe sometime this week, maybe over coffee or something and tell her. You'll never know until-" He froze mid-sentence, catching wind of her words. "Beca...? Oh no, no no. Put down that phone! Becs! Are you listening?"
"Chloe?" Beca breathed out shakily, ignoring her friend's frantic yelling and knocking on her door.
"Beca? Hey, what's up? Where are you? Is that Bumper shouting?" Chloe asked, her eyebrows creased and knitted together.
"Chloe, let me speak. I've always wanted to tell you about how I feel but I am always interrupted, or cut off! I'm sick of it!" The redhead grimaced at the shrillness of her voice, pulling her cellphone slightly away from her ear. Aubrey moved to stand nearer to her best friend; her eyes bulging when she heard the one-sided conversation.
Shit.
"Choe. I'm calling you to congratulate you on finding happiness. I'm so happy when you dumped that horrible human being that is Mike - really I am happy for you. And I wanted to tell you how happy I am now that you've found Jamie so quickly!" Beca punctuated her last words with a snap of her fingers.
"Becs, that's not... Where are you, Beca? Are you alright?" Chloe asked worriedly, motioning for Jesse and Luke to split up and search for their friend.
"I'm fine, Chloe. Everything is fine! In fact, I'm calling you to tell you," Beca pulled the cellphone away and burped loudly. She smacked her lips before returning to the call.
"Excuse me. I'm calling you, Chloe Beale," the brunette lifted her free hand and gestured carelessly in the air, "to let you know that I am so over you. And that, my friend, is me fleeing... fleein-"
Bumper managed to unlock the door and crashed into her room. His wide eyes landed on the brunette who had passed out on her blankets; her arm outstretched over the edge of the bed with her cellphone lying haphazardly on the floor.
With shaking hands, he picked up her cellphone and placed it to his ear, wincing when Chloe's next words tumbled through the speaker.
"You- You're over me?! But since when were you under me?"
A/N: Thank you very much for reading till the end. I know some of you think that Chloe's an idiot but I'll sort her out in Part II. Yes, there are several parts to this entire story (all in my head now, actually). This will also include why Bumper's aversive towards his own birthday and the real reason behind Aubrey and her dad's estrangement. In the next few Parts coming up, Beca's career, Luke & Stacie, and Bumper & Fat Amy will be addressed, muehehehe.
Anyways, just to reiterate: not all characteristics of FRIENDS's cast will be featured – this is after all a PP fiction. Just to calm your pits, here's how I matched the characters:
Beca – Rachel / Chloe – Phoebe / Aubrey – Monica / Jess – Ross / Luke – Joey / Bumper – Chandler.
I think there's only 1 correct guesser so far – good job! I applaud you. If you wonder why I've paired them as such, feel free to PM me (:
