Obligatory Chapter Heading:

Chapter 12:

Groups of raucous darkspawn fell in line. As far as the eye could see, the large, shadowy cavern had been overrun. All at once, silence reigned. Every head turned as something caught their attention.

A shriek made my blood run cold. It was followed by an ear-piercing roar.

"Hey. Wake up. C'mon." a whisper filtered through the noise as my body started shaking, "Ana, wake up."

My eyes flew open, and I lunged in to a sitting position. My shout of alarm was muffled by a hand covering my mouth.

"It's me, Ana. It's me." Alistair's words slowly seeped in through the haze.

I turned and buried my face in his chest, my breathing erratic.

He smoothed my hair down awkwardly, clearly unused to comforting people, "I-Uh. It's alright. There, there."

Panic had set in during the nightmare, and I couldn't shake it. My breathing only got worse. I leaned away from him, clutching my chest. His expression immediately mirrored how I felt; he freaked out.

"Maker, are you alright? What's wrong?" eyes wide, he waved his hands around.

"I can't…. I can't breathe…." I clumsily knelt and put my forehead against the ground, my chest tightening, "P…panic attack…."

"I don't know what that even is! What can I do? Can I do anything?"

"What is all the commotion about?" Morrigan's voice sounded from nearby, "What is she doing?"

"Something called a panic attack. I don't-"

"Idiot," she hissed, "you're going to make it worse, if you don't calm down."

A small hand rested on my back lightly, "Actually, leave us."

Alistair must have looked like he was going to argue, because the witch said "Go. Now." through clenched teeth.

After he had walked away, her hand began moving in circles.

"Shh. Close your eyes." A breathless whimper escaped me, "Do it. Close your eyes and envision a black, empty space."

We sat in silence for a few seconds before she took a deep breath and hummed quietly. It was an eerie melody that made the hair on my arms stand up. The strange thing was, after a couple of minutes, I realized the air was coming easier and easier. By the end of the song, I was able to sit upright.

"I…. Thank you, Morri."

"You are welco-What did you call me?"

My face burned under her stare, "Morri? I, uh, gave you a nickname. Because I like you."

She blinked at me, "You…like me?"

"Uh huh. I don't have to call you that, though, if you don't like it."

"No! I…. I mean, you can do as you wish." She looked away.

Scrutinizing her, I realized I may have embarrassed her, "It's not just you." I blurted, "Leli for Leliana."

"Did you say my name?" the rogue skipped over to us.

"I gave you a nickname."

"Oh? What is it?" her face was bright, excitement radiating from her.

"Leli." I mumbled.

She clapped her hands, "It is adorable! I love it!"

"And Morri for Morrigan." I couldn't help myself.

Morrigan scowled as Leliana stifled a giggle. Or seven.

"Oh, but now we need one for Alistair! I would suggest Sten, but I think it already is a nickname."

The red haired woman tapped her chin thoughtfully.

"Oh, that one was easy. It was actually the first one I came up with, since I met him first."

The two women looked at me, waiting.

"Ali."

They both cracked up, Morrigan cackling and Leliana laughing hysterically.

"What's so funny?" a very confused male voice drifted over to us.

"Nothing!" Leli and I shouted, Morrigan snickering and adding, "Ali."

"What…?" he looked at her like she'd gained two more heads.

"We were talking about nicknames, that is all." Leliana assured him.

"Nicknames?" his voice cracked as it climbed an octave.

I held up my hands, "Ali, Leli, and Morri. That's all. They're nothing bad."

He rubbed the back of his neck, not meeting my gaze, "Uh, right. Could I talk to you for a minute, Anastasia?"

"Is she in trouble? Honestly, that is all it was."

"No, no. I just need to talk to her. That's why I came over in the first place."

"You guys go ahead and take the camp down. We'll be back before you know it." I offered a small smile at the women, getting up to follow the other Warden.

He honestly couldn't be that mad about the nickname I'd given him, could he? I bit my lip, staring at his back as he led me farther and farther from the center of camp.

Abruptly, he turned and faced me, expression blank. Eyes on me. Looking me up and down.

I had to stop myself from squirming under his scrutiny. I stood silently. Waited for him to make the first move.

He blew out a gust of air and ran his hands through his hair, "Okay. So. The nightmare. Was it about the, uh, dragon?"

"Yes."

He nodded to himself, eyes closing. It was almost as if he was collecting himself before giving me bad news. What could be worse than the Joining?

"That was the Archdemon. He speaks to the darkspawn, tells them what to do and stuff. The Grey Wardens can…'understand' isn't the right word, but it's almost like that. And the dreams will keep happening, but over time, you'll learn to block them out. Some of the older Wardens even said that after a while, they'd started to understand what it was saying."

"Oh, is that all? I can handle that. I've had worse nightmares." I shrugged my shoulders, my eyes wandering.

"You have?"

My gaze locked on to his face again. He'd sounded genuinely hurt over that.

And he was. He was an open book, at that moment. Much like any other time before, actually.

"It's nothing." My voice was cold. I didn't need him or anyone treating me like I was fragile. I thought I'd made that clear the other night, "Was that all? The others are probably waiting for us."

He recoiled, taken aback by my tone, "I…. No." he blinked, "What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You're fine one second. The next, you're cold and callous. Then you're back to being fine. Why do you do that?" frustration leaked in to his voice.

I frowned slightly, tilting my head, "Maybe it's as simple as not being like other people. I wasn't raised the best. I didn't have a childhood. I don't like to be talked to as if I'm a child, regardless of the fact that I am. I-"

"You didn't have a good childhood? That's what you're blaming it on? You can do better than that. Seriously, I-"

"I said I didn't have a childhood, not that I didn't have a 'good' childhood." I corrected him, past lives bleeding in to my thoughts, "And the way you talk to me is perplexing. It's not something I'm used to. This is a learning experience for me."

"The way I talk to you? What do you mean by that?"

"Concerned. As if you care."

His sharp intake of breath made my eyes tighten, "I do care. We're the only Wardens left in all of Ferelden. If we don't stick together, we've got nothing."

"I'm a weapon. That is what I was raised to be, Alistair. I've spent my whole life being at the beck and call of someone else, killing at the behest of others. I'm almost an assassin. The only difference is I didn't get paid."

There were a few beats of silence after my little speech. I refused to be the one to break it.

So I waited.

When it was clear he was too lost in thought to make any kind of comment, sarcastic or serious, I abruptly turned and made my exit. Effectively ending the conversation the same way he'd began it.

A nose bleed hit me on the way back to camp. This was just what I needed, after that horrific encounter.

Stepping off the path, I hunkered down behind a small group of trees and let the vision come.

A lone tower, in the middle of a lake, crawling with anxious Templars. Broken men who were waiting on a miracle. Demons and Revenants and Wraiths, all vying for the deaths of everyone trapped inside. A dream world full of puzzles. A mage gone mad with power. Blood magic, used for ill intent.

The whole time, I screamed silently, raging. We were supposed to be going to Redcliffe first, but this was telling me we had to go to a tower somewhere. How could I sell this, the change in plans, after the conversation I'd just had with the only other Warden? I'd really made a mess of things, hadn't I?

Coming out of it, my eyes slowly adjusted to take in my surroundings. Golden eyes stared at me. Morrigan.

"There you are. Welcome back, young Warden."

It was all I could do to move my head. A slight nod was it.

"Tell me, do you often use blood magic?" she sounded barely interested.

"I don't use blood magic." I lifted a hand to my face, "My nose just bleeds sometimes. Without warning."

"Ah, yet it appears to have stopped. And all on its own."

"I said I don't use blood magic, not that I don't practice healing." I murmured, looking up at her.

Interest sparked in her eyes, "That is most interesting. You must tell me, sometime, what you can do."

"Perhaps."

We walked in silence the rest of the way to camp.

Alistair stood with Leliana, who was cooing over Seraphine.

I didn't pay them any mind, trying to come up with a solid reason for the change in plans.

We resumed our trek, pausing at the fork in the road that would lead us to Redcliffe within the day. It was now or never.

I walked up to Alistair and stood beside him, taking a deep breath, "There's something I have to do. Somewhere I have to go. I'm not sure where it is. Or how to get there."

"Do you know what the place looks like?"

A nod, "A tower in the middle of a large expanse of water. Templars everywhere."

"The Circle at Lake Calenhad. We can go there after we check on the Arl."

"I have to go there first."

"Why didn't you say that before?"

"I forgot." I forgot? That was the best I could come up with?

He rubbed his forehead, aggravated, "We have to check on the Arl. You said he was sick, right?"

I nodded again, "Yes. A knight said he was ill."

"Then the circle can wait. Unless you can tell me what's so important that we absolutely have to ignore Redcliffe for the time being." His eyes pinned me in place.

I pursed my lips, my hands balling in to fists, "I hate this place." I muttered, something in my expression making the other Warden take a step back.

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and whispered quietly, "I have visions."

"You-What?"

"Is something wrong?" the rogue had drifted over.

"No. But there's been a change in plans."

My eyes flew open and met his curious amber gaze.

"We were just discussing going to the Circle first."

"Oh. So we are coming here later, then?"

I spoke softly, "The mages might be able to help the Arl. And if they haven't come by now with aid, even just one mage under the watchful eyes of a group of Templars…. There might be something wrong at the Tower. So, I voted we check on them first."

Something seemed to click in Alistair's head, "Yeah. When you put it that way, I agree."

"Oh, yes. It makes sense. I will tell the others!" She turned and darted toward our companions.

"So. You had a vision about the Circle?" the warrior unsheathed his sword and studied it.

"Yeah." My stomach knotted.

"What was it about? What happened?"

"I…." my voice trailed off as I lost myself, "There's a tall Tower in the middle of water. It's peaceful. Looks can be deceiving, though. Through the door, there are pacing Templars. Warriors on their last leg. Toppling over with exhaustion. Screams can be heard beyond the closed double doors. They all look toward it; some are shaking in fear. Others are angry. There's one, some kind of leader, and he keeps them in check. He keeps the doors closed. He keeps the others from charging in recklessly. He's waiting on something. I can't see what. I- It's changing. Now, he's talking. I don't know who. He's saying he's waiting on the Rite of Annulment."

The world came back in to focus after a moment of bloodcurdling screams. I rubbed my ears, trying to forget the sounds.

"The Rite of Annulment? You're right, we do have to go there first."

"What does it mean?"

"It means they want to purge the Tower. They're going to kill everything inside."