A/N: Sorry for the wait. I was abducted by aliens...they made me their queen and after repopulating their species, I was allowed to return home.

Disclaimers: All recognizable characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Nine Months

Chapter 11

"March: Part 2"

I got weaker as March moved on. My body grew tired unable to move from the position on my bed. Usually Carlisle would come in with a nurse and place me in a wheelchair to get me bathed. Edward never left my side.

Two months and counting- that was the last time I heard from Charlie. Where ever he was now, I hope he was happy.

My mother called a week ago and asked how I was doing. The truth was…I lied. I told her everything was fine and my life hasn't been better.

My decision to not become a vampire was upsetting to both Carlisle and Edward. They had both come to love me just has I them. Even if Edward and I were no longer together, I couldn't imagine a life without him in it. I still loved him with all my heart; I just didn't want him to be as hurt when I passed. I believed that not being with him would help him to move on. But I never thought I was wrong.

Not only was I extremely wrong, but I was an outright fool to believe that he would fine! He would be affected either way, together or not, so I decided to speak and let him know.

It was the middle of the night when I awoke. The bright moon shot white rays of light in the white room. Edward stood at the same position at the window, staring blindly at the sky. I moved, making myself known to him. As he turned, I gave him a small smile to let him know I was okay. He smiled back making my heart leap out with joy.

"Hey," I said, weakly. My voice nothing more than a low whisper.

"Hey yourself. What are you doing still awake?" he asked, sitting on my bed.

"I've just been thinking."

"Yeah, of what?"

I bit my lip nervously. "Us."

He smirked and inched closer. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, I just was wondering…if you know…we might be able to spend more time together…"

He chuckled. "Bella, I'm here 24/7. There isn't much more time we can spend together unless…"

"I can't Edward. But I still want to try us again. I know I've been an idiot and stupid for going back and forth in this relationship. I love you though and as much as I shouldn't be with you, I can't forget how much you make me feel."

He grasped my hand, squeezing it lightly. "I know."

"So, can we do this? One more time?"

He leaned down kissing my lips lightly as a feather. I smiled as he pulled away immediately knowing the answer. "Does that answer your question?"

I nodded, happily. Perhaps we could do this. Just until my heart stops beating. "Edward? I want you to be here….when it happens," I breathed out weakly.

"Always."


Days passed and Edward never left my side- the constant reminder of our love for each other. If only I wasn't sick. There wasn't a part inside of me that wished for him. But even if I wasn't sick I wondered if he would let it happen or just tell me I was too fragile. To him I was nothing more than a China doll too delicate to even touch without shattering.

But as the month grew longer, I decreased in energy. I was too tired to even think half the time, and slept most hours of the day. I barely ate and when I did, I received the aftereffect of nausea. Yet during this time Edward was still there, aiding me through this last difficult time.

Call it bittersweet, the moments we share. While others couples are out enjoying their life traveling, going on dates, and making love, we were here, waiting for my last breath while I lay here unmoving, too weak to talk. And while couples wait nine months for their children to arrive in this world, I will be waiting the same amount of time to leave it.

When Carlisle told me I may only have at least a month to live, I had grown scared. But with Edward here, I have never felt safer in my life. I felt at peace in his presence which was one of the reasons why I wanted him to be by my side when it happened. Still, I couldn't help but feel that perhaps my decision wasn't the right one.

I awoke in the middle of the afternoon with Edward to the side with his nose in a book. I smiled, moving slightly to make my presence known. He glanced up and smiled brightly, leaning over to capture my lips quickly. "How did you sleep?" he asked in a caring tone.

"Fine," I answered hoarsely, lying.

His smiled disappeared and I questioned mentally if it was because I was fibbing. But I never thought it was for a whole different reason.

"Someone is here to see you," he said, keeping his face stoic and on me.

Confused, I tried to read his expression like he tries to read my thoughts, although impossible, I could faintly see disappointment arising in his eyes. "Who?"

"Bella?" the sound of a familiar voice of a lost childhood friend enters my ears. I turned my head towards the door to see my tall- now muscular- best friend, his hair now cut and his whole figure different.

"Jacob!" I hushed, wanting nothing more than to rush out of bed and into his arms. Last time I had seen him was at the end of September when I told him I had cancer and before my nasty treatment in Chemo. He had told me some positive things and made me rethink my condition. Of course though, it would never work. How I wish words could cure, but as much as they hurt sometimes I can't overthink fate's decision on my life.

He had brought a large bouquet of white roses, giving off the sweetest aroma in the room, trying to overcome the stained scent of death.

"I'll leave you guys to talk," Edward said, giving Jacob a good glare before leaving the room.

"I brought you something," Jake smiled, placing the flowers by my bedside. "I thought they would make the room less depressing."

"It's a hospital. There is nothing that can help this depressing place become brighter," I grinned, then giggled. "It's good to see you Jake."

He chuckled and frowned, looking back at the closed door. "He doesn't like me, does he?" Jake grinned, chuckling seconds later.

"He doesn't like a lot of people," I answered, laughing slightly. We stood in silence for a while before I whispered, "I'm glad you're here, Jake. I never thought I would see you again."

He shrugged. "Couldn't have you die before seeing my face one last time."

"So you know then, that I'm slowly fading."

"Yeah, you told me in September, remember? I've been away in Hawaii with my sister and her family. I'm sorry I haven't spoken to you."

I gave him a small smile. "It's fine. I'm glad to see you again. But Jake, I don't have two months left anymore."

His eyes lit up in surprised. He smiled wide, excited by the news. However, he was thinking the wrong thing. "That's great! When are you getting out?"

"No, no, Jake, I'm not getting out. I'm not in remission. My cancer has spread quicker than normal. I only have a few weeks left."

His smiled dropped and moved closer to me. "No…Bella…this can't be happening," he breathed, biting his lips and moving over to the window. "Please tell me you're just kidding with me like you did when we were kids."

"I wish I was," I breathed out weakly. "I really do."

He shook his head and sat down in the chair beside me. "If only there was a way…Bella," he glanced up at me, "I know what Edward is."

His confession surprised me to the point of where he actually found out. I was confused but curious. "I don't know-"

"He's a vampire. And I know he's trying to make you into one."

"How…?"

"Carlisle. He talks to my dad frequently since your father was good friends with him. Just in case Charlie calls, my dad can tell him everything about how you are doing. Anyways, my father is part of this supernatural tribe and he knows all about the Cullens."

"But how can you know?"

He smirked slightly. "Well I guess you can call me a werewolf. How do you think I got this buff so quickly?"

My mouth gapped open slightly, astonished by his confession. "Jake…I don't know what to say."

"Bella, I know you have a lot of questions, but I just want you to answer one of mine. Why don't you want to become a vampire? I understand that you are scared and don't feel right about it, and I wouldn't mind if you remained a human, but I'm curious to know the truth."

The truth…the truth was…I didn't know the truth, or the full truth. "I guess it's because I've cheated death before, and you can only do it so many times. Also, it's because of everyone else."

"Everyone else?"

"Yes, those who have terminal cancer and could have a future don't have a choice but to die, while I do. I believe I don't have a future. What could I do with myself anyways? Jake, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't want to become a vampire because I would live and they wouldn't. It's not fair to the others who have terminal cancer."

"Survival's guilt," Jake added, nodding his head. "Bella, that is normal to have. Every cancer patient that does survive will have a bit of that wondering why they survived and a little six year old girl didn't. You have a chance at a second life. Don't waste it."

"That's the other thing Jake. There's a voice in my head telling me to take it, that it's the best option and you know what, I believe it and I want to take it."

"Then why don't you?"

"I don't know," I cried out in frustration. "I'm just so confused in life and death. Half of me was ready to die but the other wanted to be with Edward forever. Then there is Charlie…I just don't know anymore."

"If it were me, Bella, I would listen to that part telling you to survive. I would rather have my best friend a cold monster then a dead corpse six feet under."

"Really, I thought you would've hated me as one."

"I admit, vampires and werewolves aren't the best of friends, but we're different because we are already best friends. Besides, who said I was like the others?" he smirked.

"Thank you, Jake. I think I know now what I want. The only question is will I survive?"

"I'll pray that you will. Just stay strong, Bells."

"I'll try."

As he left, I felt a pain in my heart, wondering if I did change…my family, would they accept me. Should I even tell them?

First things first though, I had to tell Edward right away.

As I was about to call out his name, he came rushing into the room. His expression was easy to read this time, concerned and anxious, and somewhere in my mind told me that I didn't want to know. But that didn't help him blurt it out.

"Bella, it's Charlie. He just got here in an ambulance. He had stroke."