A/N: Oh my god I am so sorry lol. I was not expecting to take two months practically to update. I got super busy with other stuff, and I also had a horrible writers block. I had originally planned on writing this chapter is Lux's point of view, but completely scratched that. That then left me feeling pretty blank for awhile, but I finally managed to muster enough ideas to put together what I wanted. I hope the chapther doesn't disappoint, and I hope future updates come much faster now that I've gotten over that hump. Thank you everyone who has been contacting me and asking me how I've been and about the story. It really gave me the motivation to push through and keep writing.

Typically I respond to my reviewers, but for now I think I'll continue that after this new chapters, I just want to get this out for you all to enjoy.

Thank you again to all my readers, and to all the new ones as well. Every follow/review is inspiration to keep this story going.

And thank you to my editor who makes sure things don't get too weird.

Cover Image belongs to irahi on deviantart

All rights reserved to Riot Games and their ownership of these characters and lore


Lumen Crimseon

Chapter XII |Obsession

I had slept through most of the day as always, it being another Saturday made it less suspicious; I had spent my hours earlier talking to the young blonde until the early morn. It was not like me to care about my sleep schedule. However, although this was never something I would openly admit, I was worried about the girls. Her taking the time to travel from Demacia each and every night to come just to speak with me.

"I wish she would stop this nonsense."

I spoke these words aloud to myself, lying in bed, just barely on the cusp of consciousness. My hands were covering my face, my elbows to the ceiling...I knew that was not the truth.

I was selfish.

Outwardly I tried to dismiss her, but the more time I spent with her, the harder it was to withhold how I actually felt. Yes, I worried, for each day she grew more and more dreary with her lack of sleep.

However, those hours now belonged to me.

She gave me that precious time and I never wanted it to end. The thought of her collapsing from overexertion brought me a tinge of heartache, but also a sense of pride.

It was wrong.

I, the great Talon, was in love with Luxanna Crownguard in all the wrong ways. A Demacian of all things, but that fact mattered not now.

I had slaughtered in cold blood, sought nothing for years but my own agenda, but yet...

When on my mind, she was all that was there. As if there were not room for much else. It still brought a sickening feeling to the pit of my stomach, but the more I am with her...

The more I felt there were no place else I'd rather be.

Asking for the feeling to go away had been a long running wish since this all began.

Though, that thought had begun to mutate. As if it were a mirage, disguising the true words of my heart. Go away, had become stay. I wanted this feeling to never end, the jubilation, the light feeling I got just seeing her. It was a war between heart and reason I knew I could no longer win.

'What if she had done this all out of pity?' I always asked myself. Alas, I knew this was not true either. There was so much more to it. That night she had tried to kiss me was proof of just that. She had noticed me long before I to her.

What was I supposed to do?

Never had I known the embrace of a woman. Never had someone shown me such genuine affection as she had.

I was scared.

I was so heart wrenchingly afraid of what would come from this. I had dug myself too deep, and now all I saw before me was nothing but misery. She was now a weakness. Something that could be used against me. And no matter what, if I could not have her then I would be miserable. It made me angry for many reasons, and for that I could not let it be known to her how I felt.

We could never be together.

For her sake, and my own.

She would have to be my enemy, forever.

My knuckles paled as my hands tightened around the rim of my sink. I looked up from the porcelain bowl and looked into the mirror. Pain visible across my features.

"Why did I... let this happen."

I held a hand to my chest. The feeling, it was so real. As if a dagger had gone through my heart. Why was love so painful, why could this not be conquered.

To make matters worse, all this time the General had not been on my mind.

But I loved her… I loved her. Couldn't he just… would he want that for me? Even though just that very thought could put her in danger. Just those very thoughts made me want to never kill again if it meant I could be with her.

It took away my purpose.

Was she truly worth throwing away years of my life, and starting over?

I had told her we could possibly go to that dance in Piltover, but of course when away from her and left to dwell on the repercussions, I knew it was a horrible idea.

"This will only make things worse..."

I did not want to go.

I knew I shouldn't have gone.

But I had to.

There were stronger factors that pushed me to do it.

When I saw the sadness in her eyes, I had told her maybe after I outright said no. Therefore, at this point, even if I had decided not to go myself...

She would still go.

With no means of contact, she would not know if I had decided to go or not. Knowing her, she would feel too guilty to take the chance of me not showing up. I knew she would be disappointed.

This dragged like a weight on my heart.

The other factor was that damn boy.

Ezreal.

I knew his home was Piltover, and being a young man I was sure without a doubt he'd be there.

I would be setting the girl up for nothing but heartache.

No matter which choice I made.

Which was more fair? Saving myself future anguish, or keeping her present happiness alive?

I could handle the pain, I always had. This dagger in my heart, it stung. But it would heal.

Time numbs all things.

Perhaps just this once, I would do something for someone else. For a change.

Saturdays seemed to start bringing me anxiety, in light of all the events that had happened. Being one of my only days off, it had turned into a day where I started being shoved into social events.

I had hoped after this night, I would get peace from this mockery.

That I could try to end this all peacefully, and leave with my dignity.

It was as if the world knew I was in too delicate of a state to say no to the desires of this girl, and made sure those desires took me out of my comfort space as much as humanly possible.

Truthfully, I had not the slightest idea how this night would play out.

I sighed inwardly to myself as I entered the city of wonder.

...

And wonder it was. Piltover was one of those places that never seemed to grow old.

Perhaps it was because its technological advances extended far beyond any other place in Valoran. It had been years since I actively visited the city, and it never refused to take me by surprise when I saw the massive screens showing the newest and greatest gadgets being brought to light. It was incredulously overwhelming for one who is used to only airships at best. I stopped after a bit of gawking to realize I had not the slightest idea where this event I was invited to was being held at. Grumbling to myself, I looked around hoping there would be signs indicating the event.

Not a single one in sight.

Of course.

I had not been enthusiastic about possibly repeating what occurred in Demacia with that one girl, so rather than ask, I opted simply to walk around and find it myself.

It probably would have been best if I considered asking a man or a street patroller. However, I was also rather cautious.

I came dressed as myself, no disguise.

Of course, I kept blades on me as always, but no hood. Just normal civilian clothes, with my hair down to the sides of my face. I felt rather vulnerable as Talon. I felt absolutely no desire to socialize in the slightest. I was silently grateful I had come as early as I had; it took me just about an hour to navigate the city by myself.

My punctuality never ceases to save me from embarrassment.

Walking up to the club building, it was larger than I had anticipated. Probably about three stories, it was a silver metallic building with lights shining on it from the outside. Music could be heard from the outside that sounded like a mixture of pop and rock. It was catchy, but not quite what I had expected.

I entered the building trailing behind groups, trying to stay discreet. The inside of the club was full of dancing people, blaring music, and the smell of alcohol lingered in the air. The scene was not quite as appalling as the night of that girls' party, but I still did not feel very comfortable. I went up to the bar to the left and ordered myself a shot. I would need something to help me through this night, especially if I ended up being alone.

I felt my cheeks flare up.

What if she did not even come? For any reason. I would have put myself through this humiliation for nothing.

I groaned to myself after downing my drink, ordering another.

I had swung about three shots, when I felt someone tap on my shoulder. From past events, I had become very hesitant to look to see who it was. Mostly because it was never who I wanted it to be.

"Talon?"

I heard a soft voice speak my name just loud enough for me to hear. I turned slightly only to stop in my tracks.

She was... I...

I quickly looked away from her.

"That bad, huh? I know it's a bit out there. Though, tonight was a retro night, so I thought maybe I'd dress a bit to fit the style." I heard her laugh nervously, her hands covering her knees.

She sat down next to me, just close enough that I could see her in my peripheral vision.

She wore a tight navy blue dress that came up to about mid hip. It was a turtle neck, backless. Her golden hair was slightly curled, giving it volume along with her typical head band. Along with a pair of white sneakers. She smelt different as well. It was a much stronger scent, but equally as intoxicating.

I asked for another shot.

I did not need this stress in my life.

"You look... fine. Don't worry. "

She beamed a bit, and watched as I downed my fifth shot.

Fine?

She looked delicious.

Irresistible.

It was so different from how she normally looked. She typically looked so innocent, so cute. This look though matured her greatly...

I felt my head start to cloud.

"I know you said you didn't like crowds," she outreached a hand to me, "so I have a place to show you."

She gave me a smile, her lips a dark shade of red. It reminded me of blood.

How I wish I...

I needed to stop this, I could not let what I downed control my actions and thoughts.

I took her hand, and allowed her to lead me.

She led me towards a set of stairs in the back where no one was located. I watched from behind as we quickly ascended, trying desperately to avoid looking at her body.

After climbing them, she opened a door at the top that lead to the roof of the establishment.

"Here, there are no people," I watched as she closed the door and locked it with a key, "and there are only two keys to get in here, so no one will come to bother you."

Her doing such a thing almost caught me off guard. To be quite honest, it had reminded me of what that other female had tried to do all those weeks ago, though not quite as forceful and clearly with cleaner intentions.

I thought I almost felt a slight pang of disappointment.

The view from the top could take your breath away, or, perhaps that was the alcohol. The club building was located on a hill in the city, so from the top you could practically see all of Piltover. All of its bright lights and constant sounds were far different from either that of Demacia or Noxus.

"Is this better than it was downstairs?" she looked towards me, her hair slightly blowing.

Up here with it just being her and I…

She made this so hard.

"Lux… listen I, there is something you need to know."

She leaned to me grabbing my arm gently and leading me toward the center of the roof.

"We have all the time in the world to talk. But for now, let us enjoy this moment while it lasts."

The music was fainter and slightly muffled, but it was still audible enough to hear. Her hips began to sway back and forth as her hands bent to her side and she moved closer to me.

"You told me you didn't dance. But, you never told if you could or not," she chuckled a bit as she started to spin her feet to the pace of the music, "I don't actually know how to dance myself… I only know dancing from the old movies I'd watch when we'd take trips here. I imagine my dancing is probably a little… outdated."

Her eyes closed as she began to move her arms back and forth, swinging to the beat. Unlike most others I've seen dance in this day and age, she was a bit old-school with her moves.

Though compared to how I danced, that wasn't nearly as bad.

The innocence of it all did nothing more but make her more desirable.

Standing there with my arms crossed, I watched her dance to herself with a small smile on my face. Eventually she stopped still and opened an eye at me, "it's… I am pretty sure you're supposed to do it in a pair. At least, that's how it was done in the movie. We don't have to touch though, it's just sort of a…" she began to recreate her moves again, motioning for me to copy her.

I was extremely reluctant to put myself through such a display. However, as she continued to dance, I could see her face start to strain with embarrassment. Sighing, I uncrossed my arms and attempted to recreate her moves, moving at a slower pace as I watched her.

"This is ridiculous, I look ridiculous."

She laughed.

"Well here no one can see you, so it's okay!"

Somehow, in this city, I wasn't so sure about that.

After about a minute, I was tempted to stop, when she moved in closer to me. Increasing the pace of her movements, I saw that she was trying to get me to jump into the pace with her. Avoiding her eye contact, I looked down at her feet and tried to duplicate the motions. I closed my eyes as well, starting to enjoy the beat and her presence.

Without realizing, I had moved closer, accidentally knocking my head against hers.

She stepped back laughing, rubbing the top of her head.

"Well, at least you tried," she giggled a bit, her hand moving to her mouth.

Feeling my face heat up, I looked down in embarrassingly.

I knew how to dance… just not like this.

Grabbing her hands, I watched her face suddenly change to a look of surprise as I placed her left hand on my shoulder. Positioning my right hand on her back, her other hand was clasped within my own and slightly outstretched.

I began to step to the beat of the music.

"T...Talon? I don't really think this sort of dance matches the mus-"

"It doesn't matter."

I kept my eyes closed.

If I were to be forced to dance, I'd do it the only way I knew how to. As children, the Du Couteau sisters and I were trained in ball rooming dancing in order to help refine ourselves. The General wanted us to have a bit of class in our lives. It had been so long since I had last danced. However, I couldn't bear to watch myself.

I could feel her soft skin under my hand that held her back. Such minor amounts of skin and yet it felt so enticing… never had I felt such a need for more.

"Ouch!"

I snapped open my eyes, stepping back after accidentally stepping on her foot,

"Ah, don't worry about it! I should have been watching my feet better."

I looked at her plainly.

"Is this… something you enjoy? Dancing?"

I was trying to sound as comprehensible as possible, though my current state of intoxication could more often than not make that a difficult feat.

"I thought maybe I would enjoy it, I've never gone dancing before…"

She stepped back herself, looking down at the ground, her right hand rubbing her arm awkwardly.

"What about Ezreal? Does he not live here, why had he not taken you?"

"I never had the time. It's ironic isn't it, he leaves me when I am free…"

Her shoulders slumped.

"What was it you… wanted to tell me earlier?"

She looked up at me, her face somber.

...

"We can't be together Lux."

I watched as her stare directed back towards the ground. Being so blunt was perhaps not the best way to go about such a subject, however my current state did not help my social skills.

"I… know that. I knew that I mean. I mean you! You're Talon! Why… why would you ever want to be with someone like me right?"

I heard her give a small laugh as her hands came to grab the opposite arms for security.

"You don't understand…"

"No, I do understand. I understand more than people who say 'you don't understand' seem to get. Talon I… I like you okay. And I know that's weird, I know it's wrong. I…"

She squatted down, her hands covering her head.

I took a step toward her.

What would I say? This was like the night she told me about her family, I knew I would not have the right answers and yet I knew this all had to be said.

"Are you afraid… Talon? Are you afraid?"

Her hands came down to her knees as she looked up at me, her eyes slightly glazed.

I gave her a frown before kneeling down in front of her, staying silent.

Was it truly so obvious?

"I am afraid too…. there is a lot to be afraid of. I don't want to be hurt again, and yet I… I wanted this. I've wanted this for awhile and now that it's here…I am full of uncertainty. I realize now. You're like a wolf."

She smiled, her eyes starting to brim over.

"You're a creature that can never be caged, and me asking you to do these things… it's unfair, no, it's cruel. Please… forgive me," I heard her choke on her words and she slid her head down between her knees.

All this time I had worried to myself about how I felt, about the pain I was in. I let my selfishness blind me. I may have been in love with something pure, but she? She desired something dark, something tainted.

Something evil.

'You're a creature that can never be caged...'

It was just as with Ezreal. She saw me as free. She knew nothing of the General and what I owed him.

"You're wrong… what is unfair is me allowing you to put yourself through this. I am nothing but a killer. I lie and deceive… you think you know me, but you do not."

I reached out, placing my hand on her own, "Lux, I am nothing but a loyal dog. I will never be free. You are still so young, you could do so much better."

She raised her head her face contorted shaking it slowly, "That's just not how things work… I guess I am not as smart as everyone thinks I am…"

I gave off a small chuckle.

"Knowing someone's life does not determine the level of your intelligence, it merely shows your lack in knowledge of that particular person. I suppose it is something we… all eventually learn. We are not all open books, we must be read over time."

What was I saying? This was not how this was supposed to go…

"You've known this will never work, and yet you still pursue it…"

"I thought… you wanted this too."

She paused.

"Not the dancing, I mean…"

I nodded in understanding, my face straight.

"My wants should not matter to you. I am a selfish person. This path, Lux, it will bring you nothing but heartache."

"I know…"

"Then why tread it?"

"Because I'll always want you."

She shifted her legs to the ground underneath her and leaned in closer to me.

"You've told me yourself. We are similar, we come from different backgrounds and yet we feel the same pain. You were the only person I felt would ever truly understand me. I spent so much of my life hesitating, so much of my life letting others control me… for once, I want to make this choice. Let it be bad or good, let it happen. I want you, Talon…"

I once more found myself lost in her eyes.

'I want you, Talon.'

"I don't know… what I should do."

I had tried to sway her, and yet she insisted to me this was what she wanted. I could not help but feel she was making a grave mistake, but the more she accepted it.

The more I wouldn't let her go back on those words.

She gave a small laugh, tears slightly shining in the corner of her eyes.

"Neither do I! I am so lost, I have never been so lost in my life!" she breathed out, placing her hands behind her, as she slid her legs out from under her splaying them to the sides of me.

"I am going to die someday though, as we all are. And well, this is a risk I am willing to take."

"I wanted to kill you originally. I hated you, I hated you so much."

"And what about now?"

Damn this girl.

I leaned in over her, placing my lips over hers. I had not the slightest idea if my actions were right or not for her, however to me it just felt right. As if words could not describe the overwhelming sensation from hearing her tell me of her own desires.

Of telling me she wanted me.

I grabbed one of her legs, sliding it back into the other before placing my legs on the sides of her own. Taking her back into my arms, I delved farther into the moment. I felt her tense, before feeling her delicate hands wrap around me.

It was ecstasy.

She tasted so sweet, her lips a strawberry flavor. Her smell, her softness, it killed me.

It killed me.

If this was how love was supposed to feel, I wanted this moment to never end. This taste was far more pleasant than the metallic taste and smell of blood.

I felt her grasp onto me tighter as our lips slid over each others, it was a passionate sensation. I felt her open her mouth slightly, I felt myself about to repeat the action, but then a sound was heard from the door. Stopping suddenly, we both looked over, toppling a bit as two people opened the door and walked in.

"And here it is- Lux?" the two of us looked up mortified as her brother Garen stood in the doorway. "What is it you're trying to show me, you know I'm not good with surpris…" a red headed woman stopped dead in her tracks.

"Talon…"

By the gods…

"Lux?! What in gods name is the meaning of this," the man exploded as his sister leaned back, cowering.

"G-Garen please! Let me just explain… I… it's," she stumbled over her words, grabbing the hem of her dress and sliding it farther down her thighs.

"There is nothing to be explained. It is pretty clear what is going on." He looked towards me.

I peered over towards Lux who very clearly was afraid. No matter who she was with, the fact he strikes this much fear into her was not alright. I also remembered she had on red lipstick, noticing it slightly smeared on her face.

I can't imagine I looked any different.

Katarina grabbed Garen's arm before he spoke, shoving him out of the way and walking over towards me.

"Talon, what the hell is this? What made you think this was a good idea? She is a child!"

"She is eighteen."

I heard Garen scoff.

"No matter. She is also…"

The redhead paused.

"What? What's that Kat? She's also, what?" I stood up, my form slowly towering over her.

"She's a Demacian right? Just like the man you walked in with." I used my sleeve to wipe my face. "I knew you were no better than I. Do not talk so highly to me when your hypocrisy screams right before me."

She stammered back, gritting her teeth.

"This is different Talon, this is not what you think. We…"

"Save it, Katarina. Do not bother me with the formalities of your lies. Do not waste your breath on words you know will only cause you and this brute tension later." I sneered towards her.

The two looked at each other, both of them clearly just as embarrassed.

How dare she try to ridicule me.

I bit back my rage, trying to stay calm for the young girls sake.

"We saw nothing, if you saw nothing. And we shall leave it at that."

Looking down bitterly, the couple turned hastily and left, closing the door behind them.

"N-no.." the blonde trembled on the floor, her eyes streaming with tears, "my brother… he will hate me now. I am a traitor to our faction… I…"

"Lux."

I stood still, my back to her.

I breathed slowly, trying to relax as to not snap at her. Her words, they hurt, however I knew this was a delicate situation.

"Do not let your brothers presence intimidate you. Think of all you told me. You did this because your life was not bounded by factions. Because you wished to be free… look at him. He is no different."

She looked up.

"You… you're right. I'm just, I…"

"You need to stop talking."

I turned back to her, stooping down to sit by her. We sat against the side edge. I laid my head back and breathed out frustratingly.

"This will be so hard… I don't know… I don't know…"

I told her to be quiet once more before taking my own hand and covering my face. Of all the times this had to happen, it had to be then. What horrible timing.

I groaned to myself, my face flushed.

I looked above me into the evening sky, my eyes dark.

Katarina disgusted me with her bigotry. As if she had any right to lecture me on who I could and could not be with, when she was absolutely no better.

I looked over slightly at the young woman, who was tightly hugging her legs to her chest.

She was right, this would be hard.

Was this still all worth it?

We sat on the roof for a good half an hour in silence before finally descending back through the building. There was no sign of Katarina or Garen, so it was assumed they had left after finding us.

We avoided each others eye contact, and walked through the now diminished crowd of people to the exit.

"I'm… so sorry for what happened tonight. I should have realized sooner that…"

I gave her a stern stare.

"I do not want to hear it. It was unexpected, it is not as if we knew they would both be there. What they saw is none of their concern. Besides… you already made your choice."

She looked into my eyes, her eyes wide.

"You mean… but what if…"

"Who cares, we'll deal with it as it comes."

She gave a small nod.

We walked outside toward the road. I had said goodbye and turned to leave, when I felt something anchoring me.

Turning back to her, I saw her holding my arm, a pained look on her face.

"I know I can't ask much of you. I know there will be a lot of restrictions with… us. Thank you though. You really…. you handled that situation a lot better than I had. I feel kind of stupid, to be honest."

Her face was beet red.

"You're not stupid. Not by any means. I am just used to talking myself out of bad situations. It is probably one of the few things I am good at."

She shook her head.

"I don't think that's true…"

"I wasn't even properly capacitated. I've been out of it for awhile."

A confused look grew on her face.

"You had only drank one…"

"Five, I had five. You only just saw me drink one."

She released my arm, backing up.

"You... hold yourself pretty well for being intoxicated…"

"That is because I have grown a high tolerance…"

I heard her whisper a small 'oh' to herself.

"I am leaving now. I will see you when I do."

I began to walk away when she ran in front of me, stepping up and kissing me on the cheek.

I back away almost instantly.

"I… what are you, here?"

I stuttered a bit as she leaned back and giggled..

"Lux?"

She stopped laughing, and turned back. I looked ahead of her, anger starting to reboil within me.

"...Ezreal?"

I knew it.

"Lux… what are you doing here?"

The young man walked up to us, a confused look on his face. He looked up at me.

"You used to never come out to these things… and you're…"

He stopped, going silent.

We both looked at each other coldly.

"Talon? You're Talon. Lux, what are you doing here with this?"

I stayed straight faced as she hastily retaliated.

"Ezreal, that's extremely rude."

I saw the blonde male start to laugh nervously to himself.

"Rude? Rude? Look at yourself Lux. You've stooped so far as to be some Noxians' plaything!"

I watched as the boy grew heated, with Lux standing in shock before biting back.

"Who I spend my time with is none of your concern!"

"And yet you would never have spent that with me? All that time... was this who you were spending your hours with?"

"No, of course not!"

The man looked at me, disgust filling his eyes.

"This man is a murderer, Lux, A monster. What are you thinking?"

I felt my hand twitch, my hidden blades rubbing slightly against it.

"I am thinking that he is still standing right in front of you, and that your words are extremely inconsiderate!"

"Like that matters to me! He doesn't care about you. I figured you would know better than this! I can't let you do this to yourself."

The boy reached over to grab her hand, as I swiftly latched on to his wrist. My grip death-like.

"I do not think that is your choice to make, boy. She already made hers."

He stepped back, an appalled look on his features. Snatching his arm away, he stepped back.

"I will not let you ruin your life Lux. We may no longer be together… but that doesn't change the fact I am still your friend!"

She stood behind me, holding her own hands silently.

He shoved a hand to my face, pointing.

"I swear by anything, I will convince her otherwise of this. You're not going to get away doing this, you filth. You and I know that she deserves something better than someone who slaughters for a living. Do not think I'll let this go so easily."

I watch him turn on his heels, retreating into the building.

What a night.

"Oh god…I am so embarrassed. God I am so sorry, this night has gone horribly."

I watched her grab her face, keeping her head down.

I reached over, taking her into my arms.

To say I was feeling bloodthirsty was an understatement. And although touching was something I typically like to avoid, I knew she was the only thing that would calm me enough to make me not want to slit someone's throat.

"Take the time to think over all of this. And truly make your choice when you're in a clearer state."

For once I did not feel like the fool, and yet I wish I could take that burden from her. My image was tainted by my reputation, but for her…

Her reputation was all she had.

I felt her nod into my chest.

She had given me her permission however, and now nothing would stop me.

Not Garen, Katarina, Ezreal, no… no one.

She wanted this, and no amount of doubt would keep me from getting what I desired as well.

Though, I was far from a clear state of mind myself.