Long time, no see! *hangs head in shame* I'm just going to tell you I'm sorry you have waited so long. The rest of the excuses are just that, and you want to get on to what you have been waiting for. But it means the world to me that you guys are sticking with me! I'm going to try to make it up to you.

Special thanks to Midnight Cougar who keeps me on the right path, bounces ideas around with me and kicks my ass in gear when I need her to. Love you!


The Right Path

I decide I need to get my ass in gear and treat Bella right, to make up for the mess I made last week. So now I'm on a mission to complete that, but I never thought it would be this challenging. I know Bella just wants to spend time with me and for us to communicate. But really, I want to woo her and care for her the way she deserves, plus more.

First order of business is to start delegating at work. With Rose's album mostly done, I can count on Jared and the others to finish it to my satisfaction. I'll still get the final listen and say in the last cut, but now that I have a reason to be out of the office, I need to do what I should have done a long time ago. Loosen the reins and give my team the time to shine. I know they can handle it, I've known for a long time. I've used them as a crutch and it's time to stop.

With that done, I can spend the rest of my day focusing on Colin Brady's song for the upcoming soundtrack and planning a few date nights with Bella. Our first date, miniature golfing, was fun, but now I want it to be more romantic. The problem is; I don't want to take her to any of the places where I used to take my dates.

It's embarrassing knowing I've taken several women out and that I have a reputation at some pretty refined establishments. Before I didn't give a shit what people thought, I just wanted my family off my back for not dating. Now everything is different. I don't want Bella to be subjected to that kind of scrutiny. She shouldn't have to pay for my past mistakes.

I sit at my desk, wracking my brain for decent ideas and then it hits me. What could be better than the beach at twilight? There's a place overlooking the ocean I've been wanting to try, but I never wanted to drive that far with my date. Most of the girls I used to go out with weren't very good conversationalists, so the less amount of time I spent with them the better.

But this is Bella, and being with her has been pretty comfortable from the beginning. And extremely sexy, as well. I feel my dick harden at the thought, but just as quickly my brain goes into overdrive as it usually does whenever sex is involved.

Yes, everything is out in the open regarding my past and my aversion to having sex. And yes, I know Bella will be supportive as we go through this time of reconditioning my thoughts. But it still scares the shit out of me.

I don't want to be worried about getting Bella pregnant, but what bothers me the most is how my performance will be affected. The stress can't be good for it, can it? If I ever make it that far, that is. I'm so used to stopping women before they get anywhere near there; it's going to take some serious mental training.

I sigh in defeat and focus on the task at hand. Quickly I make a reservation for Moonshadows and get back to work tweaking Colin's song. I set my mind on the positive things in my life, knowing there's not a goddamn thing I can do about my sex life at the moment. Or lack of one.

~TCQ~

Two days later, I'm back at Bella's home picking her up for our date. Getting into Moonshadows is much easier on a Wednesday evening than on the weekend, so I took what I could get. Besides, I couldn't wait to woo Bella or wait a whole work week before seeing her again. Last week was difficult enough.

The top of my Vanquish is down as we cruise through LA and head to Malibu, the sea breeze whipping lightly through our hair. Bella grabbed a hair tie from her purse before we took off, and now her beautiful brown ponytail is sailing in the wind. She is a beautiful sight; her cheeks pink from the night air, her eyes aglow as we drive toward the beach.

Quickly walking around to Bella's door, I open it up and take her hand to help her out of the car. She pulls her rubber band out of her hair and runs her fingers through it lightly.

"You look beautiful," I whisper in her ear as we enter the restaurant. Bella smiles shyly at me and shakes her head, but she doesn't refute my statement like some women do. I don't think Bella is used to taking compliments, but she tries to do it as graciously as possible.

After I give my name, the hostess leads us to our table. With the nights becoming a little chillier, especially on the water, I am thankful we have a table inside. I'm not sure the heat lamps would have been enough to keep Bella warm in her light sundress.

Our table is in the corner, surrounded by two glass walls, and we sit in our own little world overlooking the ocean. The water sparkles in the fading sunlight, the colors changing from blue to orange and finally to pitch black.

It's beautiful, but the true beauty is sitting right in front of me and I can't keep my eyes off her. Or my hands, for that matter. My fingers are missiles intent on finding their target and my hand reaches out across the table to hers; my fingers leaving trails of electricity up and down her palm. She intertwines her fingers with mine and gives me a light squeeze. Both of us thankful we still have an opportunity to make this work.

And I'm going to do my damnedest to make sure we stay this way.

We eat our delicious meals and talk about anything and everything, but my mind can't stop from thinking about touching her. Her hands aren't enough, and I know I can't do anything more about it at the moment. I'm already thinking about where we are going to go and what we will do after this.

Her flushed cheeks, her plump, juicy lips, her collarbone and neck on full display in her dress. And not to mention the area I can't see; all of them begging for me to worship her.

See, this is the biggest fucking problem with my past. My sex drive is still the same as it's always been. But it's the psychological part that messes it all up. I have the desire to be with a woman in the most intimate way, but my brain won't let me act on it. Let me just say, although I do love blow jobs and even hand jobs, it certainly isn't the same. Especially when the hand is my own.

And since Bella has been in the picture, my hand has had quite the work out.

I can't stop thinking about her, and not only because of her looks. But damn is she hot. The minute I heard how career driven she was, I was sold. Most women have a hard time with me being as invested in EMC as I am, but knowing Bella also had her own pride and joy in Sparkles; I was a goner.

The fact of the matter is my mind has been on Bella since I met her. And even though we satisfied a craving the moment we first met, I still can't get enough of her.

That scares the shit out of me.

But it also gives me hope that I can move forward from my past. I've never had feelings this intense before and deep in my heart I hope it means my mind will let me go all the way with Bella.

"Do you want to take a walk on the beach?" I ask, after the waiter brings the bill and my thoughts to a halt. My eyes are imploring her to say yes, my groin aching at the thought.

"I would love to," she answers, her eyes glance down shyly at what I can only assume is the intensity filled in my own.

~TCQ~

Hand in hand, we stroll leisurely through the sand; it's comforting knowing how easy things can be for us. As long as I don't screw it up, we'll be fine. At least, that's what I tell myself to ease the terror creeping in as I continue to let my guard down with Bella.

I tug her closer to my side and slip my hand around her slim waist. Bella sighs and leans her head on my chest as we walk.

"This has been a wonderful night," she says quietly, her eyes scanning the ocean.

"It really has. But it's just the beginning of what I have in store for you."

I feel Bella shiver at my words and it makes my pants even tighter, although I wasn't just talking about sex. Bella must know it as well as she looks up at me.

"You know, I don't need any of these fancy dates and all, Edward." Her eyes filled with something deeper as she speaks. "I only need you."

My mind is reeling at her confession and my body acts of its own accord. I bend my head down to hers and kiss her fiercely; her lips meet mine and her hand cups the back of my neck urging our mouths as close as possible. I suck her lower lip into my mouth and my hand around her waist pulls her tighter to me; her soft curves melting into my hard body.

The kiss continues until neither of us can breathe, and we slowly pull apart. I give her one more soft peck on the lips and take a moment to admire her in the darkness. Her eyes alight with the lust I'm positive is mirrored in my own.

Gently, I take her hand and pull us both on to the soft sand, our bodies sitting closely together. The sand is cold, but neither of us seems to care as I bring my lips to hers once more. Cupping her tiny face in my hands, I tilt her head to allow me better access to her. She complies readily and opens her mouth to me.

Within mere minutes, Bella is sitting on my lap, legs straddling mine. My extremely hard dick is pressed up between us. Bella's hands are in my hair, and mine are around her waist, drawing her closer to me. The friction isn't nearly enough, and Bella begins to grind herself on to me as our kisses grow heated.

Slowly, I lay back on the sand, bringing her with me. I would love nothing more than to take her right here on this deserted beach, but I know that's not nearly as erotic as one would think. Instead, I keep her on top of me, so as not to make it uncomfortable for her later on. My hands graze up her bare legs, as we continue to give our bodies what they desire.

My brain starts down its typical path, and I know that as long as I keep my pants on I can keep giving Bella the pleasure she needs. I'm not ready yet to do more for myself, but I try to push those thoughts away.

I snake my hand farther up Bella's leg and under her panties, the moaning coming from her spurring me on. Slowly, I slip one finger into her wet folds and marvel at the tightness. She begins to grind more vigorously onto me and my hips reach up to meet hers. My dick always ready to get into the action, if only my mind didn't take over.

Our kisses have moved from each other's lips and I nibble on her collarbone, trying in vain to reach her breasts. Bella senses my path and props herself up on her hands, all the while wiggling her hips onto me. I take my other hand and grasp at her clothed breast, squeezing and tugging as best I can. Bella moves to the side to give me more access and as she does she slowly drags her hand down my abs. My body stiffens in self-defense.

"It's okay, baby," she croons to me. "Let me make you feel good too. Trust me. I won't do anything you don't want."

I look into her eyes and see love. Plain and simple.

This woman knows my weakness and yet she still wants me. I nod slowly in acquiescence and try to relax. Bella's eyes stay on mine as she brings her hand to my covered cock. She rubs up and down gently, her face filled with love and lust.

Within seconds I can feel my orgasm approaching and I rub her vigorously, reaching for that perfect spot within her. Her body clenches down on my finger and I can't hold on any longer. My dick tightens and I spill out into my boxers, my pants soaking up the liquid as I continue to spasm.

It feels fucking fantastic.

After a few minutes of heavy, labored breathing we try to make ourselves presentable. But it's almost impossible in my case. Bella runs up to the nearest restroom and returns with a few pieces of toilet paper. It's the best we can do.

"I guess our evening is over," I say as I look down pointedly at my pants. "I'm sorry."

"I'm not," Bella replies with a smirk on her lips. "That was totally worth it."

~TCQ~

Bella manages to convince me that our next date night can be low key; in fact, it really should be considering our crazy work schedules. Relaxing with each other is the perfect end to the week.

I wish we could spend more time together, which is a strange feeling for me, but since both of us have fairly demanding careers it isn't feasible. So, I'll take what I can get.

Picking up Bella from Sparkles after a long shift feels natural, as I give her a quick peck on her lips and grab her overnight bag. I somehow persuaded Bella it would be easier for her to spend the night at my place, seeing as she has to get up early for work the next day.

There's no rest for the business owner, even on a Saturday.

I'm still scared as hell to take this relationship to the next level; but with Bella's assurance earlier in the week, I know we can get through this. Besides, we have slept together before. And we can always just sleep again.

We pull into my garage, and as I open Bella's door to let her out, the house phone rings. It's not a very common occurrence unless it's my parents. I'm not sure why my mom has an aversion to cell phones, but she does. And she usually has a good reason for calling. Sadly, I'm going to have to take this call; at least to let my mother know I'm alive. The option of her hounding me with calls all night is not going to happen.

Excusing myself quickly from Bella, I rush into the house hoping to pick up the phone before it's too late. The answering machine won't be enough to dissuade my mother from calling again. Esme Cullen is nothing if not persistent.

By some miracle, which I'm sure has to do with me letting my mother know I'm with Bella tonight, the phone call is quickly cut short. I make my way back into the garage and see Bella lifting the tarp off the upright piano I house in the heated room.

"Please leave that alone," I all but growl at Bella. She jumps back and yanks her hand away from the piano lid. I can feel my body relax immensely, but the look on Bella's face is one of shock that needs to be remedied quickly.

Slowly I make my way over to her and reach my hands out, giving her the option to come closer. She does and I wrap my arms around her, pulling her to my chest.

"I'm sorry, Bella," I murmur into her hair, feeling her body relax into mine. "I have that covered and hidden away in here for a reason..." I trail off; at the moment I just can't seem to find the words to tell her exactly why.

She leans back and looks up at me. "It's okay, Edward; whenever you're ready to talk, I'll be here."

Bella grabs my hand and drags me into the house, not letting my issues ruin our night. We snuggle up with takeout and watch some movie, as we eat. I have no idea what we're watching; I'm too busy looking at how gorgeous Bella is sitting here, as if she completely belongs in my home.

I push away the insecurities that come with that line of thinking and stroke her hair instead, reveling in the moment. No matter how great it sounds to settle down with a wonderful woman, it still scares me shitless, but I can't think about that now. It won't do any good.

Bella nestles even closer to me and I kiss the top of her head, innocently; although the war is already waging down below. At my kiss, she turns her face toward mine and I capture her lips gently. Bella maneuvers her body to give me more access to her mouth and I slide my tongue in to meet hers. The moan she lets out tells me the war is over. My dick is going to win this one.

Pulling her on to my lap, our hands and mouths start to roam; quickly turning this into the best make out session I've ever had. And that's including our few previous encounters.

I'm not sure if it's the security I have with Bella or my desire for release, but I intend to enjoy it either way. My hands grip Bella's waist and I pull her onto my now aching erection. I continue a trail with my hands as they slip under Bella's shirt and I feel her soft skin. They don't stop there, making their way toward her perfect breasts.

Squeezing her soft mounds in my large hands, I let out a moan and begin massaging the flesh beneath me. It's not enough, and I long to free her of her clothes and bra, desperately wanting to see her tits in all their glory and to get my mouth on them.

Bella arches into my hands and she whimpers at the contact. Her body eases back from mine to give me more room inside her shirt and I quickly bring my hands back down to her waist. My fingers are at the hem of shirt, tugging it over her head in no time at all and my mouth finds her breasts and latch on. The fabric of her bra is still in the way but I'm in too much of a state to care.

The moaning from above me causes me to press my dick harder and closer to Bella's warmth, all the while wishing there were fewer barriers, but at the same time thankful they are there. Bella's hands make their way to the bottom of my shirt, trying desperately to push it up with the little space allowed between us.

It hits me then and there that if we are going to do this; on my couch like a couple of horny teenagers is not the way I want it to be.

Scooting my body closer to the end of the couch, I swiftly grab Bella by her perfect ass and bring her flush to my body. Before she even knows what's happening, I scoop her up and carry her to my bed; our bodies never losing contact and our kisses growing more urgent.

Tossing Bella lightly on the bed, I grab a hold of my shirt and slip it over my head. I crawl up her body, admiring the view, longing to free her breasts that are heaving in anticipation. Bella's eyes are filled with lust, but I can see a bit of concern in them, as well. I know she's waiting for the moment when I stop myself.

I push the thoughts aside, as I concentrate on freeing Bella's tits. I need them in my mouth now. Once I rid them of the offending garment, I lie us both back down next to each other and let my hands wander over them in awe. Bella hitches her leg over mine, drawing us closer and my lips dive on to her, suckling her breast with ease; my hand on her other one giving it due attention.

Bella's hands are in my hair, tugging my face impossibly nearer to her as she calls out my name. Hearing her passion and lust is even better than her singing voice and I grind my hips into hers.

I break away from her breasts and trail warm, wet kisses down her stomach stopping at the top of her pants. I glance up at Bella's face, looking for the approval I know will be there. Bella's been waiting for this as much as I have. In some ways, even more so.

Seeing her eyes radiate with lust and desire, I deftly pop open the button on her jeans and slide the zipper down. Bella lifts her hips to help me ease them off her and I take her underwear right down with them.

My eyes take in her gorgeous body from head to toe; I've never seen her spread out fully before me and it takes my breath away. But when I reach her questioning eyes, I close mine in defeat. It's obvious Bella can see the inner struggle going on behind my façade.

For that is exactly what it is.

I thought if I could go with the moment, the passion, basically barrel my way through this, it would work. I would get passed it all and experience the most magnificent connection with Bella. Too bad our brains don't work that way.

Well, at least mine doesn't.

"It's okay, Edward. Whenever you're ready. There's no hurry."

My eyes meet hers and I can see the honesty behind her words, but I can't help to feel disappointed in myself. Having sex with someone you care about shouldn't be this difficult.

I reach my hand up to caress Bella's cheek. "I'm sorry," I say, my voice filled with remorse. "I wish things were different. I'm trying; I really am."

Bella sits up suddenly and cups her tiny hands around my face; her eyes are fierce but adoring.

"Edward, stop beating yourself up for something you have no control over. I know this isn't going to be easy for you, but I'm here and I will stay with you until you're ready."

Inside my head, a million thoughts are flowing, all of them contradicting each other. The only constant thought is that I need to keep this wonderful woman in my life. I reach over and kiss her gently on the lips.

"Thank you," are the only words I can get out. I'm sure this can't be easy on her either. No one likes to stop in the middle of such an adrenaline rush.

Before I can do any more about it, Bella continues, "I will do whatever it takes to help you through this. I'm on the pill and we can use condoms, as many contraceptives as you need. I'm willing to do them all, when the time is right for you. I won't rush you."

I smile sadly, knowing she is trying to help but it hurts my heart that she is burdened with my problems.

"Besides," Bella says her eyes full of mischief. "There are other things we can do in the mean time."

My lips crash on to hers at the words and it only takes mere seconds for me to remember that I have this gorgeous, completely naked woman in front of me.

I gently press Bella's shoulders back on to the bed, and begin my descent down her body. The limited skin contact we have is enough to send my senses on overdrive, and keeping my pants on puts my mind at ease.

When my mouth reaches her pubic bone, I hear her breath hitch and I teasingly avoid the area; moving my lips instead to her upper thigh, close but not close enough. I pepper it with kisses, inching nearer, her smell calling to me, but I tease her some more.

Her other leg needs the same care and this time, when I reach her wet pussy, I dive right in. Bella's body tightens in surprise but she quickly relaxes and wriggles underneath me. I lap up her sweet nectar and relish in the sight, feel and taste of her. The sounds of my name being chanted over and over tell me she's close, and I add my fingers to the assault.

It doesn't take long before my Cupcake Girl is coming undone around me and I marvel once again at her beauty in the moment. I slowly crawl up to her face, kissing her lightly on her lips and Bella returns it with fervor.

"You didn't have to do that, but thank you."

"You deserve it and so much more," I whisper quietly to her, my hands running through her hair.

It doesn't take long before Bella is asleep in my arms; her quiet breathing and the deep heave of her chest lulls me to sleep, as well.

~TCQ~

The next week Bella and I find a comfortable flow for us; meeting together when we can for impromptu dates and scheduled ones. I make no other move to progress sexually, and neither does Bella. I'm positive she's waiting for me to do it.

Other than that, our relationship is great and it has changed my attitude at work immensely. So far, no one has the guts to say anything to my face, but the strange looks are evident. I toss them aside, not letting anyone get me down and head to my office.

A knock at my open door signals Jared's arrival and I wave him in.

"Hey boss, Rose's album is done," he says as he tosses a CD case on my desk. "Thought you might like an extra copy of this one."

"Thanks man, I really appreciate that."

"Any time, boss," Jared says with a smirk before leaving my office.

Yeah, I'm a sucker now, but I know Bella will be excited to have her own copy of the album before it hits the stores. Heck, it doesn't have a real cover or anything yet, but that will come later.

As I make my way down the street, a few hours later, I can't help but notice the spring in my step and the smile plastered wide on my face. The song "Walking on Sunshine" couldn't be more accurate at the moment and I find myself humming along to the soundtrack in my head.

Yeah, I'm a dork.

But I'm a happy, in love dork.

I swing open the door to Sparkles and look around for Bella. What I see stops me dead in my tracks and sends my world crashing down around me.

Bella is caught up in an embrace with some tan, buff dude I don't know, and her smile and light laughter tell me she's clearly enjoying herself.

Anger and jealousy course through me like lightening and I don't bother to stay. She's obviously happily busy and doesn't need me around.

Wrenching the door open in my haste to leave, I don't register the sound of the bell chiming above me and instead storm out of there before I do anything I regret.

My feet swiftly carry me to my car parked around the back of EMC, but before I drive off I make a phone call.

"Hey, can we get together?"


Yeah, I know. Let Cupcakeward and I have it in the reviews. We know you want to!

Also, Birthdays, Bands and Boys is now complete. Check out the Vamp ficlet on my profile! It's up for the Twific Fandom Awards as well. Thanks to whoever nominated it!

And finally, I wrote a little something for the Age of Edward contest. It's anonymous, so I can't say anything more. Except for happy reading!