Suspended life
Everyone - and that is everyone in Arrow verse - now knows how crazy Felicity is about our masked vigilante.
She left her car in the middle of parking lot with the driver's seat door open and her car keys still in ignition and she ran inside the hospital. Once inside, Felicity had no idea which way to go. She was going towards the reception area when Laurel and Tommy spotted her looking bewildered.
"Felicity, this way," Tommy waved at her.
Felicity ran towards them and asked, "How is he, I drove as fast as I could," she was breathing hard.
Tommy put his hands on her shoulder and tried to calm her down, "Breathe Felicity, Breathe, he is okay. Let's go see him okay."
While they were heading towards the elevators, an orderly came and asked Felicity to park her car in the parking area instead of leaving it in the middle of patient drop off lane.
"What, where did I leave my car?" Felicity was still out of sorts.
Tommy realized that Felicity was not in the best of mental state so he took over.
"Laurel, why don't you take her to Oliver's room and I will sort out her car and parking issues," he patted her back and motioned her to go with Laurel and went with the orderly to park her car in the designated area. When he came out and saw how she left her car, he realized how bad she must have been feeling throughout the three hour long drive from her parent's home. The car was parked diagonally as if she was trying to drive inside the hospital with her keys left in the ignition, her purse on the passenger seat and her phone and tablet were on the floor – which Tommy suspected must have fallen off the passenger seat when she put on abrupt breaks – perhaps multiple times. Her half zipped weekend case was lying on the back seat with her grey peacoat on top of it. Tommy thanked the orderly, parked her car and picked up her coat, her bag and her phone before he headed inside.
...
While Laurel and Felicity were waiting for the elevator, she turned to her and asked again, "what happened?"
"He was coming back from his club late one night, his bike slipped on the ice and he hit the pavement. He is through with the surgery and is now recuperating,"
Laurel filled her in during the short elevator ride. The minute she stepped out of the elevator and saw Diggle in the hospital corridor outside Oliver's room, she ran towards him.
"What exactly happened Digg, did you guys go without me on the comms? Did it happen because I was away this weekend?" She was hanging on to his arms with tears running down her eyes.
"Nothing like that Felicity, it was just a road accident, his tyre hit an icy patch and the bike skidded, throwing him off. He's through the surgery and is in his room. If you want to see him, I can take you in there, okay?" Diggle patted her shoulder.
Felicity wiped her tears and nodded her assent. The two of them entered the VIP room in the hospital.
The minute Felicity entered the room, everything else faded. All she could see was Oliver lying on the bed on his side, his face away from the door. A tiny patch of his head near his neck was shaved and there was a tube coming out of that part of his skull. She walked towards the bed like she was in a trance – ignoring everyone else around her. She reached the foot of the bed, hesitated for a while and then walked around the bed to see his face. She wanted to see his eyes - his beautiful eyes - to reassure herself that he was alive but they were close. There were tubes coming out of his mouth and nose and his face was pale.
She stood beside the bed, a little bent to see his face at a better angle. "Digg, why are there so many tubes going in and out of his body, you said he only skidded off his bike," she asked.
Thea, who was sitting on the couch in that massive private room walked up to Oliver's bed on the other side and said, "Well, he might just have skidded but his head got pretty banged up. Thank God he was wearing a helmet. He had internal bleeding and the doctors had to operate – the tube is there to release any excess fluid."
"He was operated? Brain surgery? When was that?" she asked.
"Last night, immediately after he was brought in," Thea responded again.
"So it has been how many hours since then? And why he has not woken up as yet?" Felicity was full of questions.
Moira, who was silently watching this exchange walked up to her and put her hand on her arm, "They are keeping him sedated till they are sure that there is nothing else going on in his brain. Once they remove the tube, they will take him off the meds and he will wake up. The doctors believe everything will be okay."
Felicity felt her legs giving away at that and she grabbed the railing of Oliver's bed for support. Roy brought her a chair and Moira helped her sit down. All she could see was Oliver's face – pale and vulnerable – with tubes going in and out, but he looked strangely relaxed, as if he is sleeping a deep sleep after exhaustion. She pulled her chair closer to his bed and tentatively traced his jaw line with one finger and then with two. She touched his cheek bones, his closed eye lids, his forehead, the bridge of his nose, his chin. She touched every part of his face and taken liberties with them that she never could when he was awake. She did not even realize what she was doing but perhaps she was trying to reassure herself that Oliver was there – with her – alive and breathing.
Tommy entered the room and saw Felicity mesmerized with Oliver's face, looking at it, touching it. Felicity is open in her affections to everyone but Oliver. To see her oblivious to everyone else – especially Oliver's mother and sister – revealed how shook up she was with Oliver's accident. He raised his brow and beckoned Diggle to follow him outside. Laurel too followed them to the corridor.
"Who called her and told her about Oliver's accident?" Tommy asked.
"I don't know, she just called me a couple of hours ago asking me about updates, I offered to go and pick her up from her mom's but she was already on her way, what happened?" Diggle looked concerned.
"She is in a very bad condition Diggle, she left her car in the drop lane half inside the reception area – her door was left hanging open and her keys were in the ignition. Her Tablet and phone were on the car floor – and this is Felicity we are talking about who loves her gadgets as much as people love their children – I am surprised that she survived the long drive from her parent's home and got here in one piece," Tommy was worried.
"I called her Tommy, I thought she would like to know," Thea said from the doorway.
"I mean shouldn't she know about Oliver, we all know these two are close and the way she is behaving right now, I guess it is a lot more than that," Thea was a little defensive when she saw Tommy's set jaw and worried face.
"Yes, you were right Thea, no one is blaming you," Laurel was quick to assure the younger girl that she is not at fault.
"It's just that with these two, one never really knows how to tread. They have been dancing around each other for so long, there is this pull and push so one does not know if they are as close to each other as we all think or as distant as they would like us to think. Tommy would have preferred if someone had gone to collect her instead of just calling her. Apparently she left her car running downstairs and she was crying while driving which was kind of unsafe, hence Tommy's concern," Laurel tried to explain it to Thea.
She turned to Tommy who was holding Felicity's purse and phone and took them from his hands, "I am gonna go and talk to her and you take that frown off your face. Everyone is alive and breathing and it will all be okay," she kissed his cheek and went in the room.
Tommy looked at Thea and pulled her into a hug. "It's okay Speedy, he is gonna wake up soon and will mock us all for our concern. He is a cheeky bastard like that, I mean look at him, he conned us into believing that he was dead for 5 years and he came back, more muscular than ever before, and became a CEO among other things, this is just a minor injury, if anyone can beat it, it is him right?" Tommy pulled back and looked at Thea.
Tommy who wanted to comfort Thea ended up seeking her assurance that Oliver will recover. They stood in that corridor for quite some time – seeking strength in each other's embrace – that her brother and his best friend will be fine.
...
Three hours later, Laurel was shocked when she tried to get Felicity to go home with her. The generally gentle Felicity refused to move from his bedside.
"I am not going anywhere until he wakes up," Felicity was adamant to not leave his side. "He may not say it but I know that he hates it when I go away, he relies on me. What if he needed something and I am not here? I am not going anywhere."
Laurel wanted to tell her that Oliver is in a drug induced coma, he most probably would not require her to do anything but she did not say anything and looked helplessly at Tommy. Tommy looked at Diggle and then Diggle stepped next to Felicity.
"It's okay Laurel, you guys go home. I will be here with them, if anything comes up, we will let you guys know," he patted Felicity's shoulders as if trying to assure her that no one will force her to leave.
Moira and Thea looked at each other and went to Oliver's bed to say good bye.
Laurel too nodded at that and then one by one, everyone except Diggle and Felicity left the room with the promise to come back next morning. Felicity did not hear anyone's goodbyes, she kept looking at Oliver's face, her one hand holding his left hand and the other one tracing his facial features – as if she is trying to memorize his face by touching it a million times.
That first night set the pattern for the next 6 days, everyone else will come and go but Felicity would remain glued to his side. When they realized that Felicity would not leave the hospital until Oliver was out of coma, they gave in. Every night Thea, Diggle or Tommy would stay with Felicity. Laurel would be the first one in every day with breakfast and a fresh set of clothing for Felicity. She would then head out to work. Thea, Roy and Tommy would come during the day and would stay for long or short durations depending upon their schedules. Moira, who has taken over Oliver's responsibilities at Queen Consolidated – would drop by after work every day and would stay till late night. A couple of board members also dropped by to check up on their CEO.
Felicity received a surprise when she saw her parents on the 5th day at the hospital. Apparently, Tommy had been talking with them and updating them about everything. They came to make sure that she was doing fine. She assured her parents that she was fine and would be back to her old routine once Oliver wakes up. Her mother seemed pleased with this development and talked to Tommy in hushed tones before she left.
No one asked Felicity about Daniel – he did not come, did not call her and when Laurel offered to call him on her behalf, she declined, telling her that he was in New Zealand and that she does not want to disturb him all the way across the world. Felicity was in such a precarious condition that no one pushed her.
Felicity spent the six days after Oliver's accident in a Zombie like state. It seemed like she was living a suspended life where the only decision she made for herself was to not leave Oliver's bedside, the rest, she left to others. Not once did she ask Diggle about vigilante business and how was he managing it on his own. She did not ask Moira about things at Queen's Consolidated, though she would give her input when Moira seeks her opinion on something. When someone would bring her food or coffee or a drink, she would obediently drink and eat it. When the doctors would call on Oliver, she would quietly stand by on the side and then hack the hospital's records to get updates, but she would not ask them about his progress. She would wear whatever clothes Laurel would get from her apartment, she would go and sleep on the couch in Oliver's room in the hospital when Tommy or Diggle or Thea would ask her to rest. She would watch whatever is on TV with Roy who was big on reality TV and had an opinion on everyone from all the Real Housewives to Millionaire matchmaker and Honey Boo Boo. The only subject off limits was Oliver Queen and her continued presence by his side.
When there is no one around and it was just Oliver and Felicity, she would pull up a chair and sit next to him. Look into his face, hold his hands, run her fingers on his arms and his face and talk to him quietly about things that they never talk about – like how in her opinion renewable energy sources are the way of future and QC's applied science division must invest in it to her desire to see all the shows on London's West End. She told him that at times she think about going back to her original hair color but she has grown so accustomed to her blonde locks that she may not be able recognize herself if she was not blonde, she also asked him if it made her sound shallow.
On the third day, they removed the tube at the back of his head and declared him out of danger. On the fourth day, he was taken off oxygen and on the fifth day, they took him off the meds that were keeping him asleep. Now they just had to wait for him to wake up to determine his condition.
On the sixth night, Thea stayed with them at the hospital. Felicity was in her favorite position – in the chair by Oliver's bedside holding onto his hand – but she looked tired and exhausted. Six days of not sleeping in a bed and taking showers in hospital bathroom had taken its toll on her. Thea asked her to take the huge sofa in the room and sleep but she declined and told Thea that she would take her up on the offer when she would get tired. Thea shrugged her shoulders and started watching a film on her tablet. She did not put on the ear plugs because she wanted to keep her eyes and ears on Oliver and Felicity – more on Felicity than Oliver if truth be told because she was worried about the older girl.
It was a little before 2.00 am when Thea heard Oliver mumbling – she jumped up and went to see Oliver who had woken up and looked a little disoriented. Thea looked at Felicity, but she was in deep sleep – her face resting on Oliver's forearm and her fingers entwined with one of his hands. Oliver cleared his throat and gestured if he could have something to drink. Thea grabbed a glass with a straw that was sitting by his bed – probably put there in anticipation of him waking up by Felicity – and handed it to him. He took a couple of sips and whispered, "What happened?"
Thea smiled with tears in her eyes, "You had an accident but it seems you are gonna be okay, let me get the doctor."
Thea turned to get the medical staff but Oliver stopped her.
"Wait, tell me something before the whole circus descends here," he asked.
She turned on her heels with a smile and said, "What?"
"Err, what exactly happened to me?" and when he tried to lift his hands, he realized that there is weight on one of his arms, it was only then he noticed a woman with blonde hair sleeping on his forearm and turned to Thea again with question is his eyes, "Is that Felicity? Why is she sleeping here?"
"Like I said Oliver, you had an accident, all of us have been worried, she more than all of us put together if you ask me, you were out for seven days and she hasn't left your side for six of those days, let me get the doctor, he will fill you in," Thea rushed out to get the doctors.
She was by his side for six days, though he just got out of a medicine induced coma and was little fuzzy on most things, the thought that she was by his side filled him with joy – if the feeling of joy was possible soon after waking up from coma.
Oliver tried moving his hand from under her face and called her name, "Felicity!"
She woke up with a jerk, her glasses askew, she looked around her and said, "Sorry, I just dozed off," to no one in particular.
It was when Oliver said "Hey," that she realized that Oliver was awake and she stood up and pushed her chair back.
"Oh you are really awake; I thought … I was dreaming or something. Where is Thea, I thought she was watching a film on Netflix, shouldn't I be calling for a doctor," she babbled and did not know what to do.
"Thea just stepped out to get the doctors," Oliver responded.
"Oh," Felicity looked everywhere but at him and turned when she saw Thea entering the room with a whole team of doctors and other nursing staff.
There was a flurry of activity afterwards, both Thea and Felicity were asked to wait outside while doctors checked his motor functions and ran a few tests on him. Thea texted everyone that Oliver has woken up and seems to be fine and that they don't need to come right now but they all should be there to greet him bright and early.
When Felicity and Thea were let in the room again, it felt different. Not only was Oliver sitting up, he was wearing beige pajamas instead of the sky blue hospital gown and was smiling.
"They shaved part of my head. What do you think; can I shave the other side and go for a Mohawk?" he looked at both the girls with an amused look.
Thea sat by his side and kissed his cheek.
"You can only do the Mohawk if you promise to get skull tattoos, I mean what's the point of shaving the sides of your head if you don't have some bad ass tattoos to show, what say Felicity?" She turned and asked her.
Felicity in the meantime got settled on the couch with a blanket around her legs. She smiled and said, "I would pay good money to see Oliver show up in a Mohawk at Queen's Consolidated and face Isabel Rochev. If he comes out alive, he is allowed to touch my computers."
Oliver laughed out loud at that while Thea suspiciously looked at them.
"Are we talking about computers here or is this some weird euphemism for something far kinkier? You guys know that I am still a teenager, right?" Thea raised her eye brows as she looked between them.
Oliver admonished her with a pointed "Speedy" while Felicity mumbled something along the lines that she may be a teenager but she probably was getting more action than both the adults in the room.
With that, Felicity decided that she would catch some sleep on the sofa. She pulled up the blanket, bid the brother sister duo good night and closed her eyes, she went to sleep immediately.
Thea sat on the edge of Oliver's bed and the two chatted in hushed tones about everything that Oliver missed in the past one week.
...
Felicity woke up with a start when she felt some weight on her foot. She sat up and adjusted her askewed glasses and saw Thea's fido patterned sock clad foot that fell on hers. It seemed that sometime during the night, Thea took up the other end of sofa and dozed off.
"Hey," Oliver looked her way when he heard the rustle of the blankets.
"Oh hi, good morning, you are up early," Felicity set the blanket aside and got up.
"Yeah, I have been told that I have been sleeping for a week so I couldn't really go back to sleep after I woke up last night, still a bit disoriented though. Considering what we have been up to for all these years, it took a fall off the bike to keep me bed ridden for a whole week," Oliver laughed.
"Well, it was not just a fall and you are going to take it easy for a couple of more weeks, okay," Felicity walked up to his bed with a look that said that she will get people to tie him to the bed if required.
Oliver smiled and looked at him and when he kept looking at her, Felicity got a little flustered.
"My hair probably looks like a bird's nest. They have not seen a hair dryer or a straightener in a week's time. I am probably not even fit to be in polite company" she said.
He patted the bed space beside him and said, "Then it is a good thing that I am generally impolite. Sit with me," Felicity who spent many a nights by his side, sitting on the chair, sitting on his bed next to him, sitting at the foot of the bed with his feet on her lap suddenly felt shy. Showing affection to a comatose Oliver was easy, he was lying in bed, in need of that attention and care and she gave it willingly. But now that he is up, smiling and looking at her with his piercing blue eyes, she was a little nervous.
When he saw her hesitate, he added "please."
Felicity was not really capable of saying no to this version of Oliver – in hospital bed, smiling at her and saying 'please' so she relented and sat on the edge of the bed.
They both were quiet and looking at everything but each other. All of a sudden, Oliver picked up her hand and said, "Thea told me that you have been here all this time?"
When she did not respond and continued to look down at the white hospital bed sheet like it is the most interesting object, Oliver squeezed her hand and said, "Thank you. I mean I was not really awake for most of the time – or all the time – but thank you for being here. You didn't need to be here."
"It's okay, I mean you occupy most of my time – I am either at work with you or doing all kinds of illegal things for you at our underground headquarters, I seriously have no idea what I would've done if I had not been here, I mean there is so much TV one can watch right?" she tried to joke about the fact that she was glued to his side. When Oliver was comatose, she had no qualms about being around him but now that he is up and asking questions and being grateful to her, she really felt that she over reached as a friend and perhaps it would have been better to be at work helping his mother instead of being with him.
She pulled her hand out of his and said, "I should leave, I plan on going to work today – your mother has been holding the fort but I think I should be there as well – and this," she pointed a finger towards her hair, "needs a lot of time and attention if I am to look presentable so I am going to take off and work on it," she was nervous and pointed to her hair again as if citing follicle emergency would wipe out those days and night that she spent with Oliver – some of them on the same bed – at times with an audience which lead her to flush deeply and she wondered how everyone must have thought that she was bonkers.
Just when she thought she escaped the humiliation of Oliver actually saying anything more, Oliver called her again and said, "Thank Daniel for me, will you? It was really nice of him to let you spend so much time here."
She barely nodded and left the room. When she came out, she had tears in her eyes and she felt like she was quite the prized hypocrite.
Notes:
I managed to update it within a reasonable amount of time and it is a longer chapter so yeay for me.
I would really like if people leave some comments (and I would welcome nasty critique as well) because that will help me become a better writer. So I would love it if there is some feedback at the end.
