Chapter 12

Hermione could immediately tell something was wrong. Sirius hadn't greeted them with his usual warmth, and he had been off all morning. Elaine hadn't seemed to notice, but it was obvious to Hermione.

She wanted to ask him what was wrong, but didn't want to put him on the spot in front if Elaine. She hoped to have a chance to speak to him in private once they got back to his flat to set-up and decorate the tree.

After they had picked out a tree and some decorations, they headed back to his flat. After much contemplating, Elaine had decided the tree would look best in the corner of the living room between the fireplace and the window looking out over the Alley. They had spent hours decorating, listening to carols in the wizarding wireless, and Sirius had made hot chocolate from scratch, much to Hermione's surprise.

While he had play-acted well, he didn't fool Hermione. So, when Elaine fell asleep on the couch in the late afternoon, she followed him into the kitchen as he washed the mugs from the hot chocolate.

"What's the matter Sirius?" She asked softly so she wouldn't disturb the sleeping girl.

Sirius looked surprised. He must have thought he had fooled her, "I, umm, I had it out with Harry yesterday."

Hermione felt her lips form an 'o' in surprise. "I take it that didn't go well?"

"We had a shouting match in the middle of the Ministry."

"About me?" Hermione asked, horrified to be the catalyst for such an exchange.

Sirius shrugged, "Not entirely about you, but you were part of it. He informed me that his kid's birthday party was this morning and I was invited. Acted like I should be thrilled that they deigned to invite me, then got all bent out of shape when I said I had plans. Tempers flared, and then we got into it about you. He knows we've been spending time together and why I've been angry with him."

"What did he say?" Hermione asked, not really sure she wanted to know the answer.

"Nothing! In fact, he said 'I don't know what to say.' So, I told him to say nothing."

"I'm sorry," she said.

"Don't be sorry. None of this is your fault. Maybe I should have just told him before. At the very least we could have avoided a scene. I just... I don't know what I'm going to do now."

"What do you mean?" questioned Hermione.

Sirius leaned against the counter, not answering at first. She waited him out, leaning against the counter across from him.

"I've always hated my job. But I did it for Harry. To protect him. But we haven't been the best partners lately. The level of trust we used to have isn't there anymore. I don't know, maybe it never was.

Lately, my head and my heart haven't been in it. And it's not the kind of job you should be doing half-hearted. I need to be there one hundred percent, and I haven't been."

"But you're afraid? Afraid of what the future looks like without your job? Maybe even without Harry?" Hermione queried when he didn't continue.

Sirius jerked his eyes up to hers, startled. He finally nodded, looking pained. She felt for him. She had gone through the same fear and anxiety while facing a return to the wizarding world and losing the life she had known. But he had helped her through it. And she wanted to do the same for him.

"Whatever you decide, you are not alone," she said, throat suddenly tight with emotion.

Sirius quirked his lips into a small smile and nodded again. Just then, Elaine wandered into the kitchen, rubbing her eyes. "What's for dinner?" She asked, making Sirius chuckle. Hermione was so happy to hear the sound, she grinned and ruffled the girl's hair.

Yes, she would do what she could for this man.


Sirius had been a dreading Monday for a multitude of reasons. He had spent the rest of the weekend thinking about what to do, and he had decided it was time to leave his job as an Auror.

Not only did he hate the job, but Harry didn't need him. And since Harry was the only reason he had taken the job in the first place, it seemed foolish to continue on.

He was planning on telling Harry he was leaving on Monday, and he was also dreading the aftermath of his argument with him on Friday.

He didn't know what the future would bring. He wasn't at all looking forward to finding another job, but he felt like nothing could be worse than the position he was in now.

And he believed Hermione when she said she would be there for him, and so would Moony and Tonks he knew. He wouldn't be completely alone, even if he lost Harry. It was a small comfort, but he clung to it.

When he reached his cubicle Monday morning, he didn't see Harry in his. He sat down, determined to have it out when he came back.

But Harry didn't come back to his cubicle until after lunch. Sirius had no idea what he could possibly have been doing, but was obviously avoiding the confrontation he must know was coming.

When Harry sat down, Sirius marched over and asked him to talk. Learning his lesson from the last spectacle they had caused, he lead Harry to an empty conference room.

Harry looked at him with sad eyes but didn't say anything when Sirius closed the door.

Backpedaling from his purpose in the actual face of his godson, Sirius asked "Did Albus get my present?"

Harry nodded, "Yes, he loved it, though Ginny was unimpressed."

Sirius smirked, happy that his gift had given the intended reactions.

He cleared his throat, "Harry, I've spent a lot of time thinking this weekend, and I've decided... I'm quitting being an Auror."

Harry stared at him, looking dumbfounded. Then he burst out, "So, that's it! You're abandoning me because of this mess with Hermione?! You're choosing her over me?!"

Sirius was shaking his head before Harry had stopped talking, "This isn't about Hermione, not really. This is about you and me."

Harry suddenly looked to be on the verge of tears, "So you're abandoning me on my own merits," he stated.

"I'm not abandoning you Harry!" Sirius cried, frustrated. "You'll just be assigned another partner. And I will always be there for you personally if you need me. You're my godson, and I love you. But I'm done pushing my way in where I'm not wanted. From this point forward, you have to come to me. I can't keep doing this anymore."

Before Harry had a chance to reply, Lyons ripped the door open "Potter, Black! There you two are! There's been a reliable tip about the whereabouts of the suspect in the Boardman case. I need you two to check it out."

Sirius looked at Harry, who had a determined look in his eye. "Fine, we're on our way," he said brushing past Sirius. He could do nothing but follow.


Sirius' mind was spinning, thoughts everywhere but where they needed to be, which was entering the abandoned warehouse in muggle London after a suspect in a violent home invasion. He felt muddled, and knew he was not being as careful as he needed to be.

Harry was somewhere behind him, looking down abandoned hallways. Entering a large room at the end of the hall, Sirius heard a shout from somewhere above him, then before he could react, he felt pain running down across his chest. He looked down, brain recognizing in a detached sort of way that he was bleeding. And there was a lot of blood.

As he fell to his knees, he heard Harry's panicked voice shouting his name behind him. As he closed his eyes, honey brown curls and electric blue eyes flashed behind his lids, then he knew no more.