Another version of my Breaking Dawn Parody, I re-wrote it because I've thought up some funnier stuff. And flamers that flamed my New Moon one... f'ck you! I don't care what you think!

I might change the name of this, it's not really a Breaking Dawn Parody anymore, is it? Any name suggestions?


Location: Edward and Bella's cottage

TBC: So, explain it to me again.

AC: For the 152nd time, I'm wearing the long red wig to be Victoria, and you're wearing the blonde wig with the ponytail to be James.

TBC: Why do I have to be the guy, I mean, you are blonde.

AC: They're blonde highlights. And you're the guy because I said so. (Bella walks in)

Bella: Meep! EDWARD!

TBC: Nom, Bellaaa.

AC: You need to die Bella, you killed my James.

Bella: But, he's right there.

AC: Shush! Aaaanyhoo, I must kill you... with my DELETE button... And no, I'm not a Cyberman.

Bella: OH MY GO- Wait, delete button?

AC: Yes.

Bella: That's a wig, isn't it?

AC: (Gasp) How dare you, my hair is not a wig! I spend forever on my hair! (Strokes hair)

TBC: (Deep man voice) How dare you insult my Victoria like that.

Bella: Hey, you're both smaller than I remember, Victoria, you were pretty tall, now you're... well... small.

AC: (Bursts into tears) I'M NOT SMALL! (Rips Wig off) I FUCKING HATE YOU! (Disappears)

Bella: What did I do?

TBC: (Takes James wig off) You called her small.

Bella: You've called her small, I heard you.

TBC: I was joking, and a best friend can.

AC: (Appears) Bella, I've decided I'm not going to rise to what you said, I'm only going to do this, and I think this is what every Bella-hating girl wants to do.

Bella: And that would be?

AC: (Slaps Bella) That.

Bella: OW! Bitch, that hurt!

TBC: Wow, you are a crappy vampire.

Bella: (Rubs face) Why?

TBC: Vampires aren't meant to feel pain.

Bella: Really? Oh... well... that didn't hurt.

AC: Na, it's too late.

Bella: (Starts crying)

AC: Did we mention Vampires can't cry, either?

Bella: N-no.

AC: It's official.

TBC: Bella Swan/Cullen, you are the worst vampire ever!

Bella: Wha- I'm the- EDWARD! (Runs away)

TBC: Awesomesauce.

AC: We just made Bella Swan cry.

TBC: Talk about life ambitions.

----

Location: Cullen House

Bella: It was horrible, first she slapped me, then she... she...

Edward: What Love?

Bella: She said I was the worst Vampire EVER!

AC: Hey, what's up everyone who's not Bella?

Edward: You made her cry.

AC: She's still crying?

Edward: Yes, she is.

AC: Carlisle, back me up on this. Vampires are not meant to cry, right?

Carlisle: Uh... no, they can't.

AC: Ahh, one step further, they can't cry. And Vampires cannot feel pain?

Carlisle: No, they can't.

AC: Case closed.

Edward: Bella, are you crying?

Bella: (Looks up with mascara half way down her face)

Alice: HER FACE IS RUINED!

AC: I think you'll find her face was ruined to begin with.

Bella: What!

AC: I mean, look at her, the fugliest thing ever. I'm surpirsed kids don't get nightmares from it.

Jasper: I hate to burst your bubble, but what does 'Fugly' mean?

AC: Oh, it means Fucking Ugly, I think. That's what I assume it stands for.

Bella: I am not Fugly!

AC: Right.

TBC: (Appears) Hey! S'up.

AC: Hey Elizabeth. L-O-L.

Jasper: My head hurts! What the hell does 'L-O-L' mean?

AC: Laugh Out Loud. Geez Jasper.

TBC: (Rubs Jasper's head)

AC: Get off his head, Elizabeth.

TBC: He said his head hurt, I'm making him feel better.

AC: Point taken, continue.

Jasper: (Shudders)

TBC: (Hums 'You Belong With Me' by Taylor Swift)


Chappie done. Please, I need names if I'm going to rename this fic. Please tell me if I'm wrong about Fugly, I have heard that it means Fucking Ugly, from Mean Girls, a leg-end of a film. And I made Bella cry!

Love ACx

REVEIW!