A/N: In the even that this story is deleted from this site, it can also be found at yourfanfiction . com (no spaces, same author name - bloodsoakedleather) so you may continue to read.
Agron could not keep the smile from his face when Nasir returned to their bed that night. The young Syrian had been so happy these past few days, ever since Spartacus had given voice to his request, and it warmed him to see it, for at times he had feared that Nasir would never be truly happy again.
He closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep, teasing as the smaller man dropped down beside him and crossed his legs. He could feel Nasir's eyes upon him, could feel the excitement crackling in the air around him and waited to see how much time would pass before he became impatient and woke him with a playful swat to his chest. He could not draw out the tease though and little more than a single heartbeat came and went before his longing to once again gaze into dark eyes and see them sparkle almost as they had before overwhelmed him.
"Someone is cheerful." He said cracking open one eye and flashing Nasir a lopsided grin. "Tell me, what has put you in such fine spirits this evening?"
"Oenomaus." Agron cracked open his other eye and looked up Nasir curiously. "He has been studying the training schedules so that he may fit in my lessons without causing expense to others. It has not been without difficulty, but it is done. I begin instructing tomorrow."
The gladiator felt his chest swell once again with pride and gratitude and a hundred other emotions he could not put name to. He had been right that Spartacus' suggestion would be good for Nasir but he had not expected the younger man to warm so quickly to it, he had presumed that he might take at least some small amount of persuading. That Nasir had embraced the idea so fully and without hesitation was better than he could ever have hoped for.
"Indeed, that is good news." He reached up instinctively and touched his fingertips to the corner of Nasir's mouth where his smile was stretching it and Nasir smiled just a little wider. "You are beautiful when you smile." He whispered softly, a faint blush creeping across his cheeks when he realised he had said the words aloud. He shifted his hand to Nasir's shoulder and gave it a hearty squeeze. "It is good to see you smile again Nasir, to see your eyes once again full of life."
"It feels good to smile again and to feel that smile in my very being." The younger man lay down beside Agron and stretched his legs out, wriggling slightly to his side so that they were touching, shoulder to shoulder. "For so long now I have felt as an outsider, watching from the shadows while the rebellion forged ahead absent me. I had forgotten that I was a part of it. Spartacus has reminded me that I belong and to know that he sees in me not just worth but strength and ability… it means much to me."
Agron nodded slowly, ignoring the tiny pinprick of jealousy he felt at knowing it was Spartacus who had given Nasir back his smile and not him. It mattered not who had done so, only that it had been done.
"Spartacus is a great man. He has always seen in others that which they could not see in themselves. He has inspired many a man to strengths beyond those they believed themselves capable of."
Nasir was silent for several moments, deep in thought. Agron turned his head to look at the other man, wondering what he was thinking but not questioning.
"That is so." The Syrian said at last. "He is a great man. But…"
"But?" Agron raised an eyebrow towards him.
"But you are a better man."
The gladiator snorted with laughter.
"The compliment is well received… if misguided." He said, turning his head again and gazing up at the stars, more serious now. "I am no Spartacus."
"Do not doubt yourself." The Syrian replied, his brow falling to a deep furrow as he raised himself up on one elbow and stared down into the face of the man beside him. "I speak from the heart. Spartacus did not rush to my side in my time of need. Spartacus did not offer the pieces of his own broken heart to fix mine. Spartacus did not hold me through the night and ease my pain when the nightmares came. Spartacus did not love me when I could not love myself, he did not show me I was strong when I felt weak…" Agron opened his mouth to speak, to protest, but Nasir silenced him with a finger against his lips. "It was you Agron. You did those things, not Spartacus. You saved me, you gave me hope. What Spartacus sees in me now, he sees only because of you. But for you he would see not a man but an empty shell."
There were tears in his eyes as he spoke, but these tears were different from any that had been cried before and Agron felt the pricking of them in his own eyes. Nasir's words had touched him, deeply, meant so much to him. He knew he would never have the words to express to Nasir how much but attempt was made anyway.
"Nasir I…"
No sooner had his lips parted he found his words stolen, along with his breath, by Nasir's own lips pressed gently against his and by the Gods it had been so long and even he had not realised how much he had missed this. A sudden, almost painful bolt of sensation, both physical and emotional surged through his body, making him tremble with longing. How he longed to wrap his arms around the other man and pull him down, to ravish his mouth and his body, yet there was no indication that Nasir meant the kiss as anything more than gratitude. A low, desperate moan rose in his throat but he swallowed it, kept his hands at his sides, balled into tight fists. He would not give in to his baser desires, he would not subject Nasir to that, would not even give him cause to think of it. He had promised friendship only and that would be all he gave, no matter how much it pained him.
Surprised by his own reaction, his unreservedness in seeking Agron's lips, Nasir pulled back, slightly alarmed and very confused. The kiss had been fleeting and chaste, just the barest of touches but it had awakened in him feelings that had long been dormant. Feelings he could not deny, feelings that had once been his to own but now seemed foreign and unfamiliar. Flushed and bewildered and with so many questions running unchecked and unanswered through his mind, he tore himself away from the other man and turned his back, suddenly feeling horribly bereft of Agron's closeness but uncertain of what might happen if he clung to it.
"It is late. We should sleep." He muttered, already knowing in his heart that sleep would not find him tonight.
"Indeed." The gladiator agreed, making a feeble attempt to silence the beating of his heart, afraid that Nasir would hear it and somehow know of his desires. "You will need your strength if you are to teach this rabble tomorrow." He did not move, but stayed there on his back staring up at the stars. Sleep would not find him this night either.
Reviews appreciated
