Chapter 12-What Doesn't Kill You…

Bonnie sat in the passenger seat of Stefan's car as Elena sped away from the Boarding House. Tears trickling down her cheeks, sobs wrenched from her very heart. A heart that had been shredded to pieces by one Damon Salvatore.

"Bon, sweetie, you have to calm down. You're going to make yourself sick crying like this," Elena said, smoothing Bonnie's hair from her face.

It was then that Bonnie realized they had stopped moving and were in front of her house. Her house, she had to go into that house alone. How could she have been so stupid to think that Damon was falling for her? How could she have forgotten how good he was a manipulating those around him? Why had she repeatedly ignored the warnings Stefan and Elena had given her? Deep down Bonnie knew the answer to these questions. She loved him, despite the revelations of tonight, despite the crippling pain in her chest; Bonnie Bennett was completely in love with Damon Salvatore.

"I'm so pathetic," she whispered.

"No you're not," Elena said, lifting Bonnie's chin to look at her, wincing when she saw the pain reflected in her best friend's face. "Damon's the pathetic one. You just made the wrong choice. We all make them and we all have to learn from them. You'll get over this and you'll be stronger. Now come on, let's go in and I'll call Caro to come over to stay with us."

"No, Elena. I really need to be alone right now. I appreciate you wanting to stay, but I just can't do this right now. And this is Caro's big night; I won't ruin it for her, especially not because of Damon," Bonnie replied as she opened the car door.

"Bonnie, you don't need to be alone. If you don't want me or Caro, at least let me take you to Grams. You're hurting too much right now. Besides Damon can get in if he wants," Elena says.

"If I go to Grams in this condition, Damon is as good as barbequed. Damon won't physically hurt me Elena. That much I do know for sure. I really just want to be alone with my thoughts and pull myself together before I have to face everyone. Please, Elena. I need this time to myself," Bonnie pleaded.

Elena reluctantly agrees, "Okay, but you call me if you change your mind. I don't care what time it is." Elena reaches across the car to pull Bonnie into a hug, "I love you, Bonnie B. And I promise everything will get better."

Bonnie exits the car. Elena watches her friend drag herself into her house and knows Bonnie will spend the rest of the night crying her eyes out. Even knowing this, knowing how shattered the girl who had been her rock when her parents had died was, Elena couldn't help but feel a bit satisfied that Damon's attention would be coming back to her. Elena rested her head against the steering wheel as tears of embarrassment seeped from her closed eyes. "What's wrong with me? What kind of monster am I?" she whispers to herself. She wipes her tears, gives one last look at Bonnie's now lit window and pulls off.

Later that night

The figure looked at the beautiful young woman who is lying on the bed. Her eyes were swollen and the faint white streaks marring her milk chocolate cheeks gave evidence to the fact she had cried herself to sleep. Her gown was carelessly thrown on the floor and she hadn't bothered to put on any night clothes. She was dressed in nothing but a lacy strapless bra and matching underwear. Tendrils from her pinned up hair had escaped and were now cascading down her shoulders. Her breathing slow and deep, with the occasional whimper of sadness that made her watcher flinch, as if feeling her pain. She looked more breathtaking in this moment than she had at the Founder's Ball.

Damon crouched down beside Bonnie's bed and gently pushed a lock of hair from her face. Try as he might, he couldn't delete the image of Bonnie's heartbroken, betrayed face from his brain. He had never meant for tonight to go as far as it did. After his conversation with Stefan, Damon had retreated to his bedroom to sort out his thoughts and feelings.

He loved Katherine, he wanted Katherine, but Bonnie. He wanted Bonnie too. He didn't want to be without her, he didn't want her to even look at another man. Bonnie had managed to become as equally important to him as the woman he claimed was his soul mate. How had this happened? How could he have these deep intense feelings for two women? Or did he really have these feelings for two women? Were his feelings for Katherine still there or were they feelings he just remembered? Or were the feelings he had for Bonnie a by-product of their shared neglectful fathers and his watching over her? Which feelings were real?

Those thoughts were still in Damon's head as he watched, in crow form, Bonnie bawl herself to sleep. He knew she was deeply upset because she didn't feel his presence. He waited until he was sure she had gone to sleep before he had entered her window and shifted to his human form.

Now looking at her, Damon hated himself.

"I'm so sorry little witch. If there were another way to get her, I would do it, but only you can do this. I need her, as much as I care about you, I love Katherine. I have to love her, otherwise all the killing, maiming and destruction I've done for the last century and a half would have been for nothing, and I couldn't live with that. So I need Katherine to make all the misery worth it. Once I have her I swear I will never hurt you again," Damon whispered to the sleeping witch. He softly runs his finger over her cheek, barely touching it. After placing a light kiss on her forehead, Damon jumps to the window sill and takes flight.

As he circles the house a still sleeping Bonnie quietly says, "Damon."

2 days later

"Wake up sleepyhead," a cheerful voice said as Bonnie felt the sun's ray penetrate her eyes.

"Uggg, Caro, its spring break. Let me sleep," Bonnie groans as she puts a pillow over her head to block out the light.

"No way, you moped all day yesterday. Today is a new day and we are going for a spa day and some retail therapy," Caroline says.

Carol and Elena had stayed with Bonnie all day the previous day. The girls had held Bonnie as she cried, yelled and cursed Damon to hell. Elena had left for home, while Caro decided to stay over with Bonnie. Elena would be staying over tonight.

Bonnie finally sits up in bed and says, "I think Matt will need you more than I do today."

"What makes you say that?" Caro replies, not looking Bonnie in the eyes.

"Today would have been Vicky's birthday. Matt needs you, not me. Besides, I'm sure Elena will be dropping in to check on me. Believe me Caro, I'm not going to lock myself from the world because Damon doesn't return my feelings," Bonnie says.

"You sure? I don't want to leave you, but Mattie was so sad when I talked to him earlier," Caro said, her decision wavering.

"Yes I am. I promise I'll go get my massage and body wrap. I'm not going to hide anymore. There's a big world out there and I'm going to be a part of it. If this fiasco with Damon taught me nothing else, it taught me that I need to live my life for me. That I deserve to be loved and cherished," Bonnie answered the blonde.

"Well if that's how you feel, then I'm outta here. I love you, I'll call you later," Caro said as she exited the room.

Bonnie fell back against her pillow as she heard Caroline leave the house. She was miserable and as much as she loved them, she needed a break from their smothering. Caro and Elena meant well, but they couldn't possibly understand the open wound that was Bonnie's heart. Bonnie felt like burrowing under her covers and never seeing the light of another day again. But instead she rose from her bed and walked over to the mirror. She stared at her what was reflected back at her.

She was a strong, powerful witch. She had spent hours last night pouring over Emily's grimoire, as Caroline slept. The things she could learn, if she applied herself to the craft, astounded her. And learn she would. Never again would she be taken advantage of; never again would she allow someone to use her tender feelings against her. By no means did she think she was over Damon, but she would get there. Soon her love for the older Salvatore would be just a memory and she would find someone that truly loved and cared for her. She had been broken, but she was on the mend. She wasn't lying when she told Caro she was done hiding from the world. Bonnie Bennett was about to become the supreme witch that her ancestor predicted her to be.

"Alright Bonnie, this is the first day of the rest of your life. You are not going to let some snake like Damon ruin you for other guys. He's not worth it," Bonnie told her reflection.

Feeling better, Bonnie heads to the bathroom to shower and get dressed. She looks back at the mirror, pleased with her choice of a tank top, skinny jeans and ballet flats. She had sleeked her hair into a ponytail and applied some makeup, not too much, just enough to give her skin a glow. Standing at her dresser, she opens her jewelry box and notices Caroline had left her locket. Bonnie picks up the locket and is immediately swamped with visions of Stefan and a tall, slender red head. She sees images of them talking, embracing and kissing. She then sees fleeting glimpses of a wolf. Bonnie opens her eyes and looks around her room. She then stares down at the locket as one thought raced through her mind: What the hell did Stefan have to do with Caroline's locket?