A/N: Just the normal stuff:
I don't own Twilight.
Special thanks to my friends Gerri (super beta) and Rory (the best prereader a girl could hope for) for making my story look like a super hero with their beautiful red and blue correction marks.
And of course, thanks to you, for reading.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Edward POV
I woke up startled, my mind reeling from the previous night's…activities. There's no way it could have actually happened. And yet, here she was, lying in my bed, wrapped in my arms, and we were both completely naked. The room was still fairly dark, so I reluctantly released my grip on Bella's sleeping form to roll over and look at the digital alarm clock. It was just after five in the morning. I knew that it was Sunday, so I didn't have to worry about getting ready for work.
Work. Ugh. I hadn't thought about work when I'd invited Bella here for the remainder of her vacation. But I knew there would be no getting out of work this week, especially if I intended to accompany her back to Seattle when her vacation time was up. Which I did. There was no way I expected her to go back there by herself. To face him. Even thinking about the possibility was uncomfortable, so I stopped. I turned my focus back to the sleeping beauty in my bed.
Amazingly, I wasn't tired, even after the day of travel yesterday. Sleep had come easily with Bella here in my arms. I'd dreamed of that for weeks, and had finally made my peace with the fact that it'd never happen just few days ago. I'd kept the hope until after I met her, and for the first few days of my trip. But she'd looked so content with Emmett that I'd had no choice but to accept the fact that she was with him. Until Friday night. Two nights ago, my hope had been renewed. I hated the way Emmett hurt Bella that way, but at the same time, I wanted to kiss his feet for having pushed her into my arms. I smiled again as I pulled her there again, into my arms. She stirred, but didn't wake. I knew I could hold her all night, every night, for as long as I lived, and never tire of it.
I lay in the bed holding Bella for well over an hour, just watching her sleep. While I watched her, my mind wandered, wondering what we should do today. What I wanted to do—stay in bed with her all day, never leaving, and most importantly, having a repeat performance of last night—would clearly be inappropriate. It felt a little strange to want that; it had never been who I was. Of course, I'd never even thought I'd been in love with any other girl. With Bella, I knew I was. It was hard to explain, even to myself.
When she was still asleep at seven-thirty, I decided that I'd better get my day started regardless of what I wanted. Rising from the bed, I got a sudden inspiration. I found a scrap of paper and a pen, and reverting back to the way our relationship had been for years, I wrote her a note.
Bella,
I hope you enjoyed your rest. I'll be in the kitchen with breakfast when you wake.
Edward
I'd almost added 'I love you' to the end of the note. I decided against it, though, because things had only recently changed in my favor, besides the fact that she already knew that I felt that way, I still thought that might be going overboard so soon. Now that I finally had her, I didn't want to push her away. I hoped I hadn't already, considering I'd slept with her the very first night I had her here, on what was supposed to have been her wedding night. I tented the note and placed it on my pillow before padding barefoot to the bathroom and taking a shower.
After I got out of the shower, I walked to the kitchen and got out all of the ingredients for omelets. I'd just finished dicing the ham and peppers and had poured the first bowl of beaten eggs into the pan I'd preheated when I felt Bella's warm arms surround my waist. I smiled and turned around. "Good morning," I greeted her.
"Happy birthday," she replied. I felt the confusion on my face, and I could tell by her reaction that Bella noticed it, too. "It is your birthday, right? June twentieth?" she clarified, suddenly unsure of herself.
"Yeah, June twentieth is my birthday," I assured her. "I guess the actual date just got away from me." I turned back around to check the eggs. After flipping them over and adding the omelet fillings, I said, "I can't believe I forgot my own birthday."
She laughed along with me. "I was going to say the same thing." Hearing her laugh was…magical. She'd been through so much, and I was glad that she seemed to be acclimating to being with me so quickly.
As we sat at my table to eat, I was about to say something, but Bella beat me to it. "Thanks for the note. Although, it wasn't quite as nice as waking up next to you."
"I'm sorry lo—," I cut myself off before I called her 'love.' Too soon, I told myself. You're in love with her, but she's not there. Yet. "I'm sorry, Bella," I corrected.
"That's okay," she assured me, not seeming to notice my blunder. Or else just ignoring it. "The note was actually kind of nice. Like the old days. It's been awhile since I'd seen your handwriting."
I moved on quickly, wanting to get her opinion on what I had planned for the rest of the day. I said to her, "So, I was thinking, maybe we could go see my parents today? I know they'd love to meet you; they know we've kept in touch all these years. What do you think?"
"Er…" she trailed off nervously.
"But, if you don't want to, we can do something else," I said quickly, immediately changing my plans. What else was there to do here? Baseball game, zoo, museum. I racked my brain for ideas. Anything she wanted, I'd do it.
"No, it's not that," Bella started. I watched her, waiting for her to continue. After a couple of minutes of watching her bite her bottom lip nervously, she spoke again. "What if they don't like me? I mean, remember our relationship?" she asked, gesturing between the two of us. "It's obviously changed after…last night. What do we say to everyone?" She was definitely nervous.
"There's nothing to tell. I mean, not nothing to tell. Crap. I didn't mean that," I said. Now I was getting nervous. "Obviously there's something to tell, but not until you're ready," I assured her. "No one has to know that we…that our relationship is changing."
"Okay."
"You sure?"
"Yeah. So, what am I to you then?"
"I'm not sure," I hedged. I knew what I wanted her to be, but I wasn't sure how she would react.
"Your girlfriend?"
Yes! my head screamed. Instead, I said, "Is that what you want?"
"Maybe," she said shyly.
I couldn't believe my ears. She wants to be my girlfriend? I had to clarify. "You want to be with me?"
"Yes, I do," she said. "I just feel like it's too soon. I mean, yesterday I was engaged to someone else. What will people think of me, flitting from guy to guy like that?"
"Okay, couple of things," I started, trying to be a voice of reason to her. "It doesn't matter what people think of you, or me, or whatever relationship we decide to have." She bit her lip and nodded at my words. "Secondly, you're not flitting. You didn't end that relationship, he did. Because he was interested in your friend for crying out loud. This is not your fault. And lastly, it's only too soon if you're not ready. If you are ready to move on, then it's not too soon."
"I was ready to move on as soon as he told me he'd already been dating her." She grabbed my hand and squeezed it when she said that, speaking with both words and actions. She was ready to move on with me.
"Then there's your answer."
"Thank you," she said.
"You don't have to thank me. I've told you that. I promised you that I'd be around for you if you ever needed me, and you needed me. So I was there. End of story. No more thanking me."
"Okay," she agreed, dropping her gaze back to the table. "Er, I should probably take a shower," she said after a couple of minutes of silence.
"Of course," I agreed quickly.
She stood from the table, looking around. "Um, I'll just use the same bathroom as last night, if that's okay?" What should have been a statement came out more as a question.
"Yeah, of course." I couldn't stop the smile from emerging on my face. My smile wasn't the only part of my body that remembered the previous night. I stood from the table and adjusted my khakis, attempting to hide my involuntary reaction from Bella. It didn't work. She smirked at me, then walked up and wrapped her arms around my neck. My arms found their own way to her waist. It was then that I noticed that she was wearing one of my dress shirts. And as near as I could tell, only that. That was seriously the hottest thing I'd ever seen. "You're wearing my shirt," I managed to rasp out.
"Yeah. I have my own clothes, of course, but I kind of wanted to wear yours." She bit her lip and blushed. "I hope it's okay that I borrowed it," she said, then added as almost an afterthought, "boyfriend."
Holy crap, did she just voluntarily admit that she wanted to wear my clothes? And call me 'boyfriend'? Man, I love her. Okay, get a grip, I told myself. I swallowed, then said, "It's more than okay. You look stunning," in that same raspy voice from before. The night before, Bella had taken the lead. Now that I no longer felt like I had to tiptoe around her, I took the initiative. I grabbed her left hand in my right and pulled her back to the bedroom. I spun her around so that she was now facing me. I wanted to crash into her, but I was afraid of hurting her if she wasn't expecting me, so I carefully lowered my mouth to hers and kissed her with all the passion I could muster. She eagerly returned the kiss. My body was already responding to having her nearby, although in all honesty, I had already been hard after seeing her in my shirt, and I could feel in the urgency of her lips on mine that she was ready for another round, too. Just as my hands reached the buttons on her shirt, my phone started buzzing in my pocket. "You have got to be kidding me," I muttered, my mouth still against Bella's. "Hold that thought," I told her, reluctantly pulling away and removing my phone from my pocket. I looked at the caller ID and silently cursed my brother for calling me now. Still breathless, I answered, "Hey, Jazz. What's up?"
Bella sat on my bed, waiting for me. "Can't I just call my favorite brother without needing a reason? Especially on his birthday?" he said.
"Uh, yeah, I guess so," I said, realizing that this may not be as quick a conversation as I'd hoped. I rolled my eyes, trying to communicate with Bella that this might be awhile. She just nodded in return, smiling a tiny smile.
"So, how'd things go with Bella last night?"
Bella was still sitting there, and while I wasn't planning on 'kissing and telling' so to speak, I'd feel a little more comfortable having this conversation by myself. "Hang on," I told Jazz.
"Oooh, she's sitting right there with you, isn't she?" he said.
I ignored him and covered the mouthpiece of my phone, speaking to Bella. "I'm really sorry, but he wants to talk." I rolled my eyes again, showing her that I most certainly did not want to talk to him right now. "Do you want to go take your shower now, and I'll be waiting for you when you finish?"
"Yeah, sure. I'll see you…soon," she said, standing up and placing a chaste kiss on my mouth. She opened her suitcase and pulled out a fresh set of clothes. I watched her with rapt attention until she reminded me, "You need to talk to your brother," nodding at the phone still clutched in my hand. I'd already forgotten about him.
"Right. Okay. Enjoy your shower." I leaned in and kissed her again. I couldn't help it. She was too irresistible.
I watched her go and sat down on the edge of the bed. I don't know how long I sat there, just thinking about Bella, before I heard, "Edward! Hey, Edward! You didn't forget about me, did you?" coming through my phone.
I pulled myself out of my stupor enough to talk to Jasper. "Yeah, I'm here."
"So, how'd things go with Bella last night?" he asked again. The man was relentless in his quest for information. I could practically hear his eyebrows wiggling through the phone, and was grateful it wasn't a video phone.
"Things went fine," I said. That was the truth, mostly, and it kept my vow to myself that I wouldn't betray Bella's confidence. I'd told her just this morning, over breakfast, that no one would have to know exactly how things were evolving between us. I intended to keep that promise.
"Just fine? Fine is disappointing, little brother," Jasper chastised me.
"Look, we're different, you and I. No offense, Jazz, but you're…looser than I am. You always have been."
"Holy freakin' crap! You slept with her, didn't you?"
How did he do that? He always seems to know. I paused, trying to figure out how to respond to his outburst without either lying or breaking that promise I'd made to Bella. He saw right through me, though. "Man, way to go!" he exulted.
"Dude, shut up. You can't tell anyone, especially Mom and Dad. Bella's already nervous about meeting them. She's afraid they won't approve of her."
"What's not to approve of? Bella's great."
"She is," I sighed, then brought myself back to reality, explaining her insecurities to my brother. "You have to look at it from her perspective. Think about the relationship I've had with her all these years," I started.
"Yeah, about that," Jasper interrupted. "I think I was right last summer at the club."
He'd successfully distracted me. "What do you mean?" I honestly had no idea what he was talking about. Jasper's memory had always been better than mine.
"Well, I've been in the fortunate position of watching the two of you over the past week, and though I meant it differently when I said it, I was still right. Your letters were not just platonic all those years." I started to interrupt him, but he continued talking, acknowledging my thought before I'd expressed it. "They didn't have to be sexual or sensual or whatever to be beyond platonic, Edward. I mean, think about it. What is the purpose of dating? To get to know the other person, right?" I saw where he was going with this train of thought, but allowed him to bring it to its conclusion anyway. "That's what you and Bella did with your letters over the years. And I think that's why you've never really been happy with anyone else."
"Dude, when did you get so deep?" I couldn't help asking with a chuckle.
"It comes with age," he said. Then, matching my chuckle, he added, "And Alice. She's had you guys pegged for a long time. She went along with the whole Bella-marrying-Emmett thing because she cares for Bella and wanted to let her make her own choices."
"Alice seems smart; wise beyond her years," I mused.
"Yeah, she is. And though she's really pissed at her sister for betraying Bella like that, at the same time, she's glad to see Bella with you instead. Even if it means losing Bella for awhile."
"Just for awhile?" I questioned.
"Well, come on, man, you had to see the chemistry I had with Alice. She's definitely more than a one-night stand."
"Seriously, Jazz? You already slept with her? You've known her a week!"
"I thought we'd already agreed that I'm 'looser' than you," he laughed. "Besides, you slept with Bella," he pointed out.
"Yeah, but didn't you just try to convince me that I've been dating her for years through the postal service?"
"Touché."
Just then, I heard the shower turn off in the other room. "Hey, Jazz, she just turned the shower off. I've gotta go."
"Oh, one more thing before you do. The actual reason for my call."
"You mean you didn't call just to harass me about my new girlfriend on my birthday?" I scoffed. I wasn't actually upset with him, though. He'd given me a lot to ponder.
"What did you say?" he choked out. I tried to think back over the last three seconds of the conversation. I couldn't come up with anything that should've elicited that kind of reaction from him, so I said nothing, waiting for him to clarify. When he realized that I didn't have an answer for him, he said, "You just called Bella your girlfriend." Oops.
"Oh. Er, yeah. We talked this morning and decided that's what we wanted. After last night, we both felt better about what we'd done with a title on the relationship."
"Really? So, she's as prude as you?" he laughed. "Okay, you guys really do belong together."
The shower had been turned off for quite awhile now. Frankly, I was surprised Bella hadn't already returned to the bedroom yet. I decided to push Jasper again and wrap up this conversation. "So you said this conversation actually had a point?" I reminded him.
"Yes. Mom wants you to come over for your birthday dinner tonight."
"Yeah, okay. We should be able to swing that," I said. "Just let her know that I'll be bringing a…guest."
"Will do."
"Alright. Thanks for the talk, Jazz."
"Yeah, no problem. Oh, and Edward?"
"Yeah?"
"I know you've wanted Bella for awhile now, so, congrats, I guess."
"Thanks, Jazz." I snapped my phone shut just as Bella emerged in the doorway. She looked stunning in jeans and a deep blue blouse. I told her as much, and she blushed; that was something I'd noticed over the past week, something that couldn't be conveyed in a written format—she blushed a lot. After a moment of admiring each other, I said, "My mom wants us to go over there for dinner tonight. Is that okay?"
"Yes," she said resolutely. Her tone was much more confident now than it had been. It seemed as though she'd done some soul-searching of her own during the twenty minutes we'd spent apart. I nodded, pleased that she no longer seemed worried about meeting my parents.
x-x-x
I had to come clean with her during the drive over; I told her that Jasper had guessed that we'd already been together. She seemed to take it in stride, and for that I was grateful; I don't know what I would have done had she been upset with me for telling him. Even though I didn't tell him.
When we pulled up in front of my parents' stone house, Bella's reaction was similar to the previous night when we'd dropped Jazz off here. I helped her out of the car and draped my arm around her shoulders. She looked up, smiling, and wrapped her arm around my waist. Even though I knew in my mind that she'd agreed to the relationship step, it still thrilled me every time she didn't flinch away from my touch. And feeling her return such simple gestures was even better.
When we went inside, she looked around, taking in all of the nuance of the room that my mother had decorated. "I thought you said this was just like any other house on the inside," she whispered to me.
"Isn't it?" I asked, teasing her. Growing up, I'd known the house was nice, but it was just home. Whereas my parents had been well off, they raised Jasper and me to be level headed and down to earth. We'd never been allowed to be conceited about what we had, because as my father used to say 'you don't have anything; everything here belongs to your mother and me.' He hadn't meant it as a derogatory thing, just simple fact to keep Jasper and me humble.
Bella glared up at me and said, "It's more than normal, yes. It's gorgeous." The last two words came out as barely more than a whisper; she was thoroughly impressed with the house.
Having heard us enter, my family came to greet us. My mother and father looked expectant; I could by their expressions that Jazz hadn't told them who my guest would be. I was more concerned with my mom's reaction than my dad's; my dad was easygoing, and not as concerned with…grandchildren as my mother was. While I knew that I was choosing Bella regardless of what they thought of her today, I still was suddenly nervous about introducing her to my mother. Well, may as well dive in; rip the band-aid off so to speak. "Mom, Dad, this is Bella. Bella, this is my mother, Esme, and my father, Carlisle."
"Bella?" my mother asked me, not even trying to hide the shock in her voice. I nodded slightly at her, trying to convey that what she had just done was…well, rude. Her eyebrows came together slightly, but she took my hint and smoothed them out again quickly. "Bella, it's a pleasure to meet you," she said, walking over to us and taking one of Bella's hands in both of her own.
Because my mother's reaction to Bella's name had been so strong, Bella had obviously noticed, and I had felt her tense at my side immediately. She stiffened further as my mom approached us, but thankfully she relaxed quickly when she felt the warmth and love radiating off of Mom. Despite her initial shock, my mom really was a warm and welcoming person. While I hadn't told her of the feelings I'd developed for Bella through our letters, she'd definitely noticed that something was up with me the past several weeks. Though I didn't date as much as Jasper—when he was home, that is; obviously not much dating happened when he was overseas on assignment—I had dated in the past, but once I'd come to terms with my feelings for Bella, I'd stopped seeing other women. I hadn't brought many girlfriends home in the past, but there had been enough for my mom to notice the change when I'd quit dating altogether.
So, now, meeting Bella, their reaction was wholly appropriate. Once Mom released Bella's hand, Dad stepped up. I had seen the shock in his features initially as well, but he'd done a better job than Mom at hiding it from Bella. "Welcome to our home, Bella," he said warmly.
"Thank you for having me. Your home is beautiful," Bella replied.
My father chuckled. "That's all Esme's doing. She's a wonderful decorator."
"Yes, you are," Bella said, turning the attention back to my mom.
"Thank you, Bella," Mom replied. "Well, we should move into the sitting room. No sense standing in the foyer all night. Come in, come in." She gestured us to follow her, and we did.
Everyone sat down, save for my dad, who stood behind the same portable bar he always did when he had company. Mom, Jazz, and I always had the same drinks, so he only needed to ask Bella for her preference. "Whatever red wine you have available would be great. Thank you," she told him. Once everyone had been served, Dad took a seat next to Mom, facing Jasper, Bella, and I, who were sitting together on the sofa. I had my arm draped over Bella's shoulders and she was resting her hand on my thigh. I couldn't keep the smile off my face; I was happier than I'd been in a long time. I instinctively pulled her just a little closer to me.
"So, Bella, what brings you to Chicago?" my mother asked. I shot her a dirty look, but only Jasper noticed. He snorted at my reaction to our mother's question, but everyone ignored him.
Bella cleared her throat, obviously uncomfortable with this question. She was tough, though, and answered it anyway. Although, she was purposefully vague, leaving out most of the intimate details. She started with a question. "Well, how much has Edward told you about my…situation?"
"Well, just that you've kept up the pen pal relationship for all these years, and then more recently that you were in a relationship, and were getting married. He told us that he was traveling to Seattle to meet you for the first time at your wedding."
"Okay," Bella said. "That's all true. So, what brings me to Chicago now is basically a case of cold feet. I talked to my fia—my ex the night before the wedding and he let me know that he'd changed his mind."
"Oh, dear, that's terrible. The night before?"
"Yeah. It kind of caught me off guard, but I think it was probably for the best. I wouldn't want to be married to someone who didn't want to be married to me, too." She shrugged it off as if it was no big deal. I marveled at her stamina; I knew she was angry with Emmett, but she was incredibly cavalier when discussing the situation with other people. I wouldn't want to be Emmett when she got back to Seattle, though. That guy was in for a serious tongue-lashing, I was pretty sure.
"Good for you, being strong enough to withstand such a terrible thing."
"Thank you," Bella nodded her gratefulness at those words. It was just what she needed to hear, and I was glad that my mom had said them. Bella continued her story, "So, then, since I already had the vacation time taken, I decided I might as well get some sort of trip out the deal, so where better than here with Edward? I enjoyed spending time with him last week, and thought it would be nice to get to know him better."
"Well, you succeeded at that," Jasper muttered, smirking at Bella and me. This time, my murderous glare was aimed at him, but it seemed to be unnecessary. Only Bella and I heard him, and besides my glower there was no reaction from anyone.
That's what I thought, anyway, until I looked at Bella's face and saw that it was deep red. "Um, would it be okay if I used your bathroom before dinner?" Bella asked. She looked like she desperately needed to get away from Jasper and his sly comment in order to compose herself before continuing the visit.
"Of course, dear. It's up the stairs, first door on the left."
"Thank you," Bella said again. She handed me her wine glass and headed up the stairs.
Once she was gone, the floodgates opened. "Edward, are you sure this was a good idea?" my father asked. I was shocked at his reaction, because he'd been so cordial and polite in the foyer. I'd had no inkling that he'd been stewing this entire time.
"Of course I am. Bella's become one of my best friends over the years, and she needed me. Her fiancé decided the night before their wedding that he didn't want to marry her. She needed a friend, someone who wasn't so close to home, to be there for her, and she came to me. Of course I was going to help her when she asked. Anyone would have done the same."
"Perhaps," my dad conceded. "But what about your body language here now? You've got your arm around her, and she's resting her hand on your leg? You look like more than 'just friends.'"
"Well, that's because we are," I stated simply. I felt no need to defend my choices to them; I was twenty-nine years old now, and perfectly capable of making my own decisions. And this was one I was prepared to go to battle on. I stared at my parents, willing them to understand that I was serious about her.
They seemed to get the message, because my father sat there, silently contemplating what I'd said, and my mother said, "Well, so long as the two of you have made the decision together, and both are happy with the choice."
"We are," I assured her. "I promise."
"Okay, then," she said, patting my father on the leg, effectively putting the kibosh on any further discussion regarding Bella and me.
I was grateful for that, especially when Bella reappeared a few moments later, looking calmer. I did not want anything more said that would upset her. She smiled as she rejoined us, taking her seat beside me again. I kissed her temple when she sat, and she turned to smile at me. I smiled back, telling her with my eyes, I love you.
The rest of the evening progressed with no incident. My parents asked Bella about Seattle, and she answered their questions with ease. When we moved to the dinner table, Bella ate silently while the rest of us just caught up after Jasper and I having been gone for a week. And after dessert, I took Bella back to my apartment.
We cuddled under a blanket, watching a movie together in the living room, then went to bed together that night. Once we were snuggled into my bed in our pajamas, I whispered into her hair, "Thank you for spending my birthday with me."
"I wouldn't have missed it for the world," she said, quoting my email from the day after I'd received her engagement announcement.
I couldn't think of an appropriate response to that, so I just kissed her hair and pulled her closer to me, holding her in my arms as we fell asleep together.
There we go, chapter 12. Please read and review. Well, actually, you've already read it, so I guess just review now :). Thanks everyone.
Oh, and BTW, this is the longest chapter to date for any of you who care about word count…it's the first time I've cracked 5k (not counting the AN in the word count). But, 13's longer. There's something for you to look forward to!
And, a special shout out to RoryCullen, for recognizing (and planting the idea in my head lol) that all those years of letters were more than platonic, even if 99.99% of them were not of a sexual nature. Thanks, sweetie :).
See you next week.
