Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns everything
AN: Thanks everyone for reviewing. I hope you like this chapter
Chapter 12
Bella's POV
Ever since his lips first touched mine I was flying. It was the best feeling in the world and I never wanted to stop. But Edward stopped us before we went any further. He said we shouldn't move to fast and I very reluctantly agreed. Even though inside all I wanted was to go as far as possible and be as close to him as I could. But I didn't want to push him.
He wrapped his arms around me and I very gently placed my head on his chest not wanting to hurt him.
"So we can be friends?" I whispered into the darkness.
I felt his chest shake and I knew he was chuckling.
"I don't want to be your friend" he whispered in my ear making me shiver "I want more than that" he kissed me on the top of my head.
"Me too" I whispered back drowsily and I slowly fell asleep.
Edward's POV
When Bella and I were kissing I forgot everything else all I could think about was the touch of her skin and her beautiful scent. Everything else disappeared. I wanted to go further but I knew we had to stop. It was to fast and neither of us was ready for that.
She looked tired so I wrapped my arms around her. I knew I couldn't let myself sleep.
She whispered softly ""So we can be friends?" and I laughed there was no way I just wanted to be her friend.
"I don't want to be your friend" I whispered softly smelling her hair "I want more than that" a lot more I thought to myself.
"Me too" she replied and my heart soared.
I heard her breathing even out and knew she was asleep. I shifted slightly so I could see her face. She looked like an angel, so peaceful and beautiful.
I lay there just watching her sleep. She mumbled a few times and I was overjoyed when she mumbled my name.
When the sun began to rise I knew I had to go home. I had to face my family at some point. I didn't want to wake Bella up but I really didn't want her to wake up and find me gone without an explanation. I shifted so I could get out from under her. But she wrapped her hands around me tighter and grabbed a fistful of my shirt.
"No" she whimpered in her sleep "Don't go"
I shook her slightly trying to wake her up.
"Bella" I said softly "Wake up"
She opened her eyes slowly and when she saw me they brightened immediately
"Edward" she whispered. "It wasn't a dream" she mumbled as though to herself.
"No" I chuckled slightly "I have to go home now"
"Nooo" she whined "Stay here" she pulled me to her and wrapped herself even tighter to me.
I almost gave in but I knew I had to go home.
"I'll see you at school later" I said softly and gently pulled her hands off me.
She pouted and I laughed quietly.
I kissed her on the forehead. Knowing if I kissed her lips I would never leave.
"I'll see you later. Go back to sleep" I whispered. She smiled at me and it took every ounce of strength of mine to turn towards the window and leave.
I walked into my house praying that no one would be there to meet me. As I walked into the kitchen my heart immediately sank when I saw Carlisle sitting there looking like he hadn't slept at all. He looked up at me with an angry look on his face. When he saw my injured face his expression immediately softened and turned concerned.
"Edward what happened?" he asked jumping up from his seat and walking towards me.
I looked at the floor "Nothing" I said softly.
He reached his hand towards my face and, though I tried not to, I flinched. He dropped his hand.
"Where have you been?" I looked up his expression was a mix of hurt and anger.
Esme rushed into the saving me from answering.
"Where have you been?" she hissed angrily but she also stopped when she saw my face.
"Oh Edward are you ok? What happened?" she moved forward and pulled me into a hug.
"Noth…"I started to say but I saw Carlisle glaring at me over Esme's shoulder so I decided to tell them.
"These guys beat me up"
Esme let go of me and looked up in concern. "Why would they do that?"
I shrugged. Just as I heard footsteps coming down the stairs and Alice and Emmett entered the room.
"What's everyone yelling about?" Emmett asked in annoyance.
They both stopped in shock when they saw my face. This was seriously starting to get old.
"Edw…" Alice started to ask.
"I got beat up but I'm fine ok. Everyone can stop worrying" I said quickly
"Where have you been all night? Your mother and I have been worried sick" Carlisle asked his eyes searching mine.
I looked down. "I was at Bella's" I mumbled
They all looked at me in confusion.
"What?" Esme asked
I took a deep breath "I was at Bella's". I heard a squeal from behind me and I turned and saw Alice jumping up and down.
"I knew it" she said happily "I knew you two would be perfect for each other. So…" she started to continue but Carlisle cut her off.
"Alice please" he looked at me "Why were you at Bella's?"
I shrugged.
"Edward" Esme said warningly
"I just…I didn't want to come home and worry you" I said softly
Carlisle groaned "But Edward you ended up worrying us more. We had no idea where you were. Jesus you could have ran away or been dead some where" the volume of his voice was rising.
I looked at the ground "Look at me damn it" he yelled in frustration
I looked up straight away and felt an irrational feeling of fear. I stepped back quickly.
"Carlisle" Esme said quickly and grabbed his arm "Come on" she pulled him towards the table and pushed him into a seat.
He put his head in his hands and whispered "I can't take this Esme I really can't"
I stood there frozen feeling nothing but shame. I couldn't take that I was making him feel like this.
I looked at Emmett and Alice who were both looking back at me. Alice's face was filled with nothing but concern but Emmett's was filled with fury. I looked away quickly.
"What is your problem Edward?" Emmett asked his voice shaking with anger.
"Emmett" Esme said warningly
"No Mum. I want to know why he is like this" he looked at me again "You think you're the only one who's lost your parents? Alice and I both lost ours to in case you've forgotten. And we still act like human beings"
I stayed silent I knew he had to get this out.
"You never smile, you barely talk, and you don't cry or even look anybody in the eye. Even us! Where you're family and you barely acknowledge us. Why can't you ever just be happy?"
Something snapped inside of me and before I could stop myself.
I yelled "I don't know what happiness is"
There was silence.
I stood silently my hands shaking. I realised what I said was not completely true I had felt happy with Bella.
I cursed myself silently I shouldn't have said anything this could only make things worse.
Carlisle broke the silence "Edward I think you should go back to therapy"
"No"
"Edward"
"No" I said firmly. There was no way I was going back.
"Look" Esme said I could see tears in her eyes "We don't have to talk about this now. We can decide later when everyone's not so worked up"
Everyone nodded.
I looked up and saw that Emmett didn't look angry anymore but was staring at the floor with a look of…regret.
Alice walked towards me and pulled me into a hug "You'll be happy with Bella" she whispered in my ear.
I nodded slightly and she released me. Everyone walked out of the room until only Carlisle and I remained. His face was still in his hands.
I walked hesitantly towards him. It took all my strength to place my shaking hand onto his shoulder.
"I'm sorry" I whispered. It was small but it was all I could offer him.
Bella's POV
I slept soundly after Edward left. I hugged the pillow he had been using which smelled exactly like him. I was excited about going to school, as always, the excitement was to see Edward.
When I got there I was immediately ambushed by Alice who was beyond excited.
"Tell me everything" she said grabbing my hand
"What?" I asked confused
"With Edward silly. I know he spent the night, there was this huge fight at my house this morning"
"Oh no" I said concerned "Are your parents mad? Is Edward ok?"
She seemed to lose her excitement for a moment and her eyes suddenly turned sad.
"I'm not sure things….were weird some things were said and….look Bella I don't really want to talk about it. Can we just talk about something happy?" she pleaded.
I couldn't let her down so I told her everything.
I only caught glimpses of Edward during the morning. He looked tired and sad but when he saw me he smiled his sweet smile that made my heart stop. I didn't have a chance to speak to him until History class where I asked if he was alright. He said he didn't want to speak about it at school but asked me to come over that afternoon. He held my hand under the desk through the whole lesson. Needless to say I didn't listen to a single word the teacher said.
After school I drove to Edward's house. Even though Alice had driven me there previously I still drove past the turnoff and had to turn around and come back.
I knocked on the door expecting Edward to answer but Esme answered instead.
"Hi Bella darling, come on in, how are you?" she asked. She looked exhausted I followed her into the house.
"Good thanks" I said hoping she wasn't mad at me for Edward staying at my house last night.
"I think Alice is out"
"Oh no, I was here to see Edward"
"Oh of course" she said and she looked at me carefully "Bella you really like him don't you?"
I nodded.
"Just be careful ok sweetie…I don't want either of you to get hurt"
"I will" I said seriously
"Well he's in his room. You know the way right?"
I nodded "Thanks"
I walked up the stairs and down the hall way towards his room. It was slightly ajar so I knocked softly and pushed it open.
I walked into the room and gasped in surprise and than in horror.
Edward was standing with his back to me without his shirt on. There was still fresh bruises covering his back but that's not what horrified me. On the small of his back there was a cluster of what looked like burns. They were small and looked old. They looked exactly like cigarette burns.
Edward turned around when I gasped and looked at me in surprise but when he saw my face his expression turned to terrified. He pulled his shirt on over his head and walked towards me slowly.
"Bella" he said softly his voice filled with pain.
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