I updated! I'll say more at the bottom.

So this is for FullmetalWizard1995. You are an awesome person.

O.O.O.O.O

Sexy back, by Justin Timberlake (I think, I'm too tired to check)

Ed was playing ping pong with his imaginary friend in the basement of his secret pocky lounge when he heard it.

BOOM BOOM BOOM!

Only one person could do that…

"EDWARD!" the door flung open, revealing Mr. Clean. Erm, I mean Armstrong…

"Crap," Ed said before grabbing his nerf gun and chucking it.

"THAT WAS VERY MEAN, EDWARD. YOU NEED TO BE HAPPY MORE OFTEN," Armstrong boomed.

"No I don't!" Ed said.

"YES YOU DO! I STRONGLY SUGGEST IT! IN FACT, YOU SHOULD TRY SPARKLING!"

"What the crap is a sparkle?" Ed asked, slightly scared.

"THIS!" Armstrong yelled, pointing to something above his head that the author once attempted to replicate using a straw, paper, and marker.

"I'd rather not," Ed said, starting to nom on twizzlers.

"I ORDER YOU TO!"

"But we're the same rank…"

"YOU MUST SPARKLE!"

"I REFUSE! For the love of all things shiny, go argue with Billy Mays or something. I'm going deaf," Ed said, attempting to fit a whole bag of marshmallows in his mouth.

"NO! LAST TIME WE DID THAT WE GOT IN A FIGHT OVER THE BEST CLEANING PRODUCTS! THEN HE-"

"I truly don't care. Just sing the song that we all are waiting for," Ed quickly ran to Walmart and bought earmuffs.

"OKAY!"

I'm bringing sparkles back
Them other men don't know what to say
They think I'm special, what's above your head?
So stay still and you can have some of mine

Listen to the bridge

Funny boy
You'll catch these sparkles
Edward you will see
Or else you'll get to hear my history
For you need to learn to radiate with joy

Listen to the chorus

Please do it
Go ahead, show off your joy
Do not hold back
Go ahead, show off your joy
Sparkle now
Go ahead, show off your joy
Just like me
Go ahead, show off your joy
So you can see how to do it
Go ahead, show off your joy
Or at least try
Go ahead, show off your joy
Why won't you smile
Go ahead, show off your joy
Don't be so stoic
Go ahead, show off your joy
And put your sparkles on
Go ahead, show off your joy

Put your sparkles on
Go ahead, show off your joy

[Repeat 6 times]

Put your sparkles on

I'm bringing sparkles back
It seems Edward don't know what to say
Come let me show you all the things you lack
'Cause you're way too serious for someone your height.

Listen to the bridge

Funny boy
You'll catch these sparkles
Edward you will see
Or else you'll get to hear my history
For you need to learn to radiate with joy

Listen to the chorus

Please do it
Go ahead, show off your joy
Do not hold back
Go ahead, show off your joy
Sparkle now
Go ahead, show off your joy
Just like me
Go ahead, show off your joy
So you can see how to do it
Go ahead, show off your joy
Or at least try
Go ahead, show off your joy
Why won't you smile
Go ahead, show off your joy
Don't be so stoic
Go ahead, show off your joy
And put your sparkles on
Go ahead, show off your joy

Put your sparkles on
Go ahead, show off your joy

[Repeat 6 times]

Put your sparkles on

I'm bringing sexy back
You mother fuckers watch how I attack
If that's your girl you better watch your back
Cause she'll burn it up for me and that's a fact

Take 'em to the chorus

Please do it
Go ahead, show off your joy
Do not hold back
Go ahead, show off your joy
Sparkle now
Go ahead, show off your joy
Just like me
Go ahead, show off your joy
So you can see how to do it
Go ahead, show off your joy
Or at least try
Go ahead, show off your joy
Why won't you smile
Go ahead, show off your joy
Don't be so stoic
Go ahead, show off your joy
And put your sparkles on
Go ahead, show off your joy

Put your sparkles on
Go ahead, show off your joy

[Repeat 6 times]

Put your sparkles on

It seemed that Edward hadn't heard anything past the word "height", though.

Armstrong was last seen being carried to the hospital in an ambulance. But no worries, the doctors say that he'll be fully restored to his loud, muscle-y self in less than ten episodes time (FOURTH WALL!).
O.O.O.O.O

I meant to type this in all caps, but I didn't remember until the last verse, so too bad! I'm not retyping that whole thing O.O And just so you know, this whole thing mutated into something far beyond what I expected. It began as a parody Armstrong rants on about sparkles, but, alas. Thus is the life of a parody writer. This grew on like the mold in Tucker's mind.

I'll attempt to get a chapter out sometime in the middle of the week, but no promises…avoiding homework is a very enduring task indeed. =p

This is your last chance to request a song! I'm super backed up and want to start another chapter story, but I won't be able to handle two. I will do all the requests before I end. That was a long authors note.

Tchao! (I'm taking French class :D)