William Turner: sure Norrie

Norrington: What! I didn't!!

Jack Sparrow: you and your positions

Norrington: oh shut up Sparrow.

William Turner: where did we leave off last time?

Elizabeth Swann: I completely forgot

Norrington: Elizabeth was pregnant

Jack Sparrow: I left so I don't know

William Turner: obviously Norrie was screwing someone

he is always doing that

Norrington: yes

Elizabeth Swann: yeah!

liz is pregnant

William Turner: right!

Jack Sparrow: oh, Congratulations

Norrington: Elizabeth found out she was pregnant while i screwed myself

OK

Elizabeth Swann: lol

Norrington: ACTION!

William Turner: I'm the father, right dear?

Elizabeth Swann: yes

Norrington: -sobs-

Jack Sparrow: I guess you're not a eunuch then

Elizabeth Swann: Indeed he is not!

I told you that Jack!

William Turner: Yeah I have PROOF!

Norrington: Proof? How so?

Jack Sparrow: I don't need to see the proof

\

Elizabeth Swann: Will...

Don't show them.

Norrington: -sighs- Fine.

William Turner: hehehe

why not?

Elizabeth Swann: Wait - you already have, haven't you?

Jack Sparrow: That goes for James too

William Turner: ummm no

Elizabeth Swann: Right.

Norrington: indeed.

William Turner: what I haven't!

Elizabeth Swann: Norrie...

Norrington: I have!

William Turner: it's only for your eyes Elizabeth

Norrington: remember?

that night?

on the Dauntless?

Remember?

Elizabeth Swann: Has you ever done anything with Will?

have

Norrington: Yes

Elizabeth Swann: Tell me honestly.

Norrington: Four times now I think.

Elizabeth Swann: See, Will!

Norrington: Or is it five?

Jack Sparrow: That was a -good- night

Norrington: indeed

William Turner: He's lying!!!

Elizabeth Swann: Why did you lie to me?

William Turner: Oh Jack not you too?!?

Elizabeth Swann: Will...!

You told me you'd never lie to me!

William Turner: dude Elizabeth I'm not the one who kissed Jack ok?!

Elizabeth Swann: UGH!

Jack Sparrow: Why don't we all just calm down and take a dip in the water

Elizabeth Swann: We already want over that!

Norrington: Yes you did, Will

William Turner: I'm not the one who had Norrie when I was unavailable

Jack Sparrow: again you're bringing that up William?

Norrington: ...Now that, you can't disagreed with.

Elizabeth Swann: We went over that too!

God, Will!

William Turner: she called me a liar! -whines-

Jack Sparrow: haven't I suffered enough from her hands

Elizabeth Swann: You ARE a liar!

William Turner: -grumble-

Jack Sparrow: we're all liars. we're pirates

Elizabeth Swann: Oh, Jack - not you to?!

Don't gang up on me.

William Turner: Sorry Jack. You're still my friend.

Norrington: WE'RE ONLY LIARS BUT WE'RE THE BEST

ONLY GOOD FOR THE LATEST TREND

William Turner: no no, Jack is definitely the best

Norrington: ONLY GOOD COS YOU CAN HAVE ALMOST FAMOUS FRIENDS

Elizabeth Swann: Excuse me?

Norrington: BESIDES WE'VE GOT SUCH GOOD FASHION SENSE

Elizabeth Swann: Not you!

Will.

William Turner: Elizabeth you can't lie, dearest

Jack Sparrow: Most of it comes from London

William Turner: not well anyway

Elizabeth Swann: I know!

I don't lie!

Norrington: WE'RE GOING DOWN DOWN!

William Turner: it's nothing to be ashamed of

Elizabeth Swann: Shouldn't you give me the same courtesy?

Jack Sparrow: Ooooooooo

William Turner: -blush-

Norrington: TAKE AIM AT MYSELF, TAKE BACK WHAT YOU SAID - TAKE AIM AT MYSELF...

Elizabeth Swann: You're the father of my BABY after all.

Norrington: -pulls trigger-

William Turner: of course, dearest

Norrington: -is dead-

Jack Sparrow: -whip crack-

He's dead again

William Turner: oh no, he died for the zillionth time

wait, isn't he still immortal?

Elizabeth Swann: He'll come back.

-runs away crying-

Jack Sparrow: You can't die if you're already dead

William Turner: he bounces back quickly

you did, Jack

and so did I

Norrington: -runs after ELizabeth- ELizabeth don't feeel bad!

I'm here for you!

Jack Sparrow: Yes but I was in the locker

William Turner: Norrie just wasn't that important

Norrington: Don't cry, ELizabeth

Jack Sparrow: See, jumps right back up again

Elizabeth Swann: -runs faster-

William Turner: Norrie, lay off her!

Jack Sparrow: keep running lizabeth!

Norrington: -runs and hugs Elizabeth- It's OK, everything'll be OK!

William Turner: Jack, you're supposed to be on MY side!

Elizabeth Swann: I'm running from ALL of you!

-runs away farther-

William Turner: do we have to do that threeway thing again?

Norrington: -catches up-

William Turner: FIGHT I mean..

Jack Sparrow: I am on your side. I'm just telling her to stay away from James

Norrington: COCKFIGHT! YEEEEAH!

Elizabeth Swann: -gets away from Norrington-

William Turner: ok good Jack

wow he is REALLY excited

Norrington: -stops running- AND I MEAN COCK

SN: ew.

Jack Sparrow: sn: I always seem to post at the wrong time

Norrington: SN: lol

William Turner: sn: it's all good

Norrington: -runs after ELizabeth-

Elizabeth Swann: sn: jeez lol

Jack Sparrow: Anyway. Let's stop him Will

Norrington: -grabs Elizabeth- Don't feel bad!

Elizabeth Swann: Stay away from me! ALL of you!

Norrington: -huggles-

William Turner: sounds good

Jack Sparrow: Oi, get back here

Elizabeth Swann: -gets out of Norrie's grasp-

William Turner: Norrington, you face me like a man!

Norrington: no!

William Turner: oh wait, you can't

ahaha

Jack, HE is the eunuch!

Jack Sparrow: good one William

Norrington: -stops running- and what is that supposed to mean?

William Turner:D

Norrington: You challengin' me, Turner?

Hah?

Elizabeth Swann: -turns around and faces Will- He is not!

Norrington: Are you!

William Turner: it means that you are LACKING in the sword department

Jack Sparrow: It means you can't PERFORM

Norrington: SN: Good one neggie!

Dayum, burn me.

William Turner: sn: why thanks

Norrington: I have been solely defeated.

-bows-

William Turner: We can have that arranged

oh CANNIBAAAAAAALS!!!1

Jack Sparrow: Crap

Not again

Norrington: Oh GOD NO!

William Turner: hehe run Jack!

Norrington: -runs like hell-

Jack Sparrow: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh

Norrington: NO!

Jack Sparrow: -runs like a screaming pansy girl-

William Turner: I'll save you Elizabeth!

-grabs-

Norrington: -screams like a wussy pussy-

Elizabeth Swann: From what?

William Turner: the rabid canibals!

Norrington: AIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!

Elizabeth Swann: I was running from YOU!

William Turner: they tied me and Jack up last time

Elizabeth Swann: Let go of me!

Norrington: SN: Am I twelve now??? HAH?!?!?!?

William Turner: not TOGETHER

Jack Sparrow: and tried to cook me

William Turner: fine

Norrington: RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNN!

Jack Sparrow: sn hahaha

William Turner: sn: wow...

Norrington: AAAAAAIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!

Elizabeth Swann: -gets out of Will's grasp and runs-

Norrington: ...wait, the cannibals aren't even here yet.

Jack Sparrow: THEY'RE GETTING CLOSER

Norrington: -stops running- OH GOD

-starts running again-

William Turner: they won't touch me!

Norrington: AIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

William Turner: -smug-

you said that already

Jack Sparrow: Keep running William

William Turner: why would I run when I can CotFD apparate?!?!

Elizabeth, no one else has cool powers like that

Jack Sparrow: There's one right behind you!

Elizabeth Swann: -continues running until she is no longer in sight-

Norrington: -screams- DEAR GOD I'M GONNA DIE AGAIN!

William Turner: eek! -apparates-

Norrington: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jack Sparrow: That'll be the second time in under ten minutes

William Turner: Jack, what are you doing?!

Jack Sparrow: a new record

Running of course

Why?

Norrington: -falls backwards- uh?

-falls upwards- OK now this is weird

William Turner: because Norrie just got caught!

Norrington: -falls backwards- WHAT THE?!?

William Turner: should we let him get tied up?

Jack Sparrow: What's going on?

Norrington: -falls upwards- CHRIST WHAT THE-

William Turner: the canibaaaaaals!

Norrington: -falls backwards-

William Turner: they have Norrie on the menu

Jack Sparrow: They must have magical abilities

Norrington: -falls upwards downwards upwards downwards upwards downwards upwards downwards -

Elizabeth Swann: -watches the scene from a safe distance-

Norrington: DEAR GOD

William Turner: hey, where did my wife go?

Elizabeth Swann: Idiots.

Jack Sparrow: They seem extra hungry today

Norrington: SOMETHING IS MAKING ME FUCK THE GROUND!

MAKE IT STOP!

Jack Sparrow: Let's fight them off

William Turner: oh is that what you were doing?

Norrington: -falls upwards downwards upwards downwards upwards downwards-

Jack Sparrow: sn; only you would think of htat

that

William Turner: I thought you were just trying to generate heat the hard way

Norrington: STOP! I DON'T WANNA FUCK THE GROUND! DIRTY AS IT IS! I DONT WANNA!

Elizabeth Swann: -thinking- What the hell is Norrington doing?

Norrington: SN: LOL i know right!!

SN: I AM SOOOO NOT TWELVE

William Turner: there are other alternatives, Norrie

Elizabeth Swann: sn: nice bea lol

Jack Sparrow: sn we noticed

Norrington: -falls upwards downwards upwards downwards upwards downwards upwards downwards-

William Turner: sn: thank god! we would be in trouble

Norrington: MAKE IT STOPP!

Jack Sparrow: Anyway, I'm tired of running. Let's fight them off

Norrington: MAAAAAKE IT STOPPPPPPPPPP!

William Turner: ok chill!

Jack Sparrow: -grabs sword

Elizabeth Swann: -laughing at Norrie's weird position-

William Turner: -grabs HIS sword-

Norrington: -falls facedown- Uhhhhh...

-looks down at pants- What's that white stuff?

William Turner: -smacks forehead-

Norrington: Oh dear.

William Turner: I think it's cocaine

Jack Sparrow: WTF

William Turner: he's on some serious drugs man

Norrington: Duh..?

brb

William Turner: um it's called sharing?

Jack Sparrow: Must everyone do cocaine at this time?

I thought you were different James

Drugs are not the answer

Rum is

William Turner: I knew you'd say that

but Elizabeth can't have any until the baby is born

right dearest?

Jack Sparrow: Can't let anything bad happen to the very little ones

Norrington: -wakes up- Uhh?

Elizabeth Swann: -runs back to the men-

What the hell are you guys even doing?

William Turner: RIGHT DEAREST?!

Norrington: NO no no this white stuff is like... thick milk...

Elizabeth Swann: Right WHAT?!

Norrington: Oh... no.

William Turner: never mind. GOSH!

Jack Sparrow: Ewwww

Elizabeth Swann: I wasn't here!

God, Will.

William Turner: grr

Norrington: SN: I CANT BREATHE

Elizabeth Swann: When did you become such a jerk?

Norrington: -stands up- Whaz goin awn/

William Turner: Look, Norrie is the jerk-off, ok?

Jack Sparrow: He's spent to much time with Calypso

Norrington: I jerk myself a lot

:D

William Turner: me?!

with HER?!

Norrington: ...oh is that what you mean.

Elizabeth Swann: Actually, he and Jack are lookign pretty good right now..

William Turner: as if...

Elizabeth Swann: -glares at Will-

William Turner: -glares back-

Jack Sparrow: Not again

Norrington: Elizabeth! You can have me! I'm open to you! And you can open for me!

William Turner: yes, they are. I agree completely!

Jack Sparrow: -sigh-

Norrington: I am... Doctor Norry! Open wide, Elizabeth!

William Turner: Jack? what are you open for tonight?

Norrington: I'm open for anything

Jack Sparrow: In terms of what persay?

Norrington: Sex, sex, sex, or... sex maybe?

William Turner: Norrington's terms

Norrington: SN: aw man i've missed this so much

Jack Sparrow: sn: me too

William Turner: sn: damn me too

Norrington: sn: as sick as that is, lol

Jack Sparrow: Anyway, I don't know William. What about you?

William Turner: It depends on how far Elizabeth is going to go.

Norrington: As long as there's sex - I'm in!

William Turner: thank you captain obvious!

Jack Sparrow: Let's skinny dip in the lake a bit

Norrington: Ooooo.

Kinky.

Jack Sparrow: Last one in dies

William Turner: I'm down

Elizabeth Swann: sn: what? sorry, i left for a min

Jack Sparrow: -jumps in-

William Turner: -dives-

Elizabeth Swann: Where are you guys going?

Jack Sparrow: skinny dipping in the lake darling

William Turner: come join us!

Elizabeth Swann: Mmmm.

No thanks.

William Turner: -pouts-

Elizabeth Swann: I think I'm too pregnant to swim.

Jack Sparrow: -splashes will-

William Turner: I'll keep the bandanna on, darling

Norrington: Skinny dipping! Elizabeth, I'll take care of you while they fuck - Um, I mean muck around.

William Turner: pleeeeeeeease?

Jack Sparrow: Swimming might do you some good love

William Turner: exercise is good for our baby

Elizabeth Swann: None of you guys are going to fuck each other while I'm swimming with you.

Norrington: Skinny dipping is disgusting - don't listen to them, Elizabeth

Jack Sparrow: No

William Turner: lots and LOTS of exercise

Norrington: SN: OOOOO BURN!

Elizabeth Swann: I don't mind with Will.

Norrington: SN: Well done, Caity

Elizabeth Swann: He IS my husband after all.

William Turner: I should hope not!

indeed!

sn: stole your line, bea

Norrington: SN: Dran.