Happy Valentine's Day! My gift is a new chapter.

animefan29: Due to discussing mild spoilers, my reply was private. Thanks for reading. ^^

Jodeist: Cagalli and Lacus meet up in this chapter. It is something to behold. XD Thanks for reading!

littlemssstrawberry: The story's hardly gotten started, and right now I don't think Cagalli's inclined to switch to the ZAFT to be with Athrun. Not yet anyway. Thanks for reading.

Light-Sakura: That's the point, you have to believe that's Cagalli talking. If you can't believe it's Cagalli, then this fic is going nowhere. XD I hope Cagalli is convincing, anyway . . . Thanks for reading!

Flutter: You have a good assumption . . . . *evil smirk*

Here we go, chapter 12.


Chapter Twelve: Special

I am not a big fan of pop music in general, I find the genre full of insufferable, shameless fluff built around the concept of easily replaceable "singles" over a whole body of work that rarely exists these days, an "album". What albums get released these days tend to be five or six of the more popular singles released with five or six other songs seemingly for the hell of it.

I should at least respect the singers and musicians for their work ethics. The singles model means they consistently have to churn out music and hits every three or four months at a time and build up to that album release twelve, eighteen, or even twenty-four months in advance. Lacus Clyne was new to this business, but her opening singles had caught fire in the Earth Alliance, ZAFT, Orb, you name it. Her first album was eagerly anticipated openly by Coordinators and privately, shamefully, by everybody else.

And of course, it helped that her father was famous, and that she had top-of-the-line songwriters tailoring lyrics to her soft, yet elegantly mature singing voice. And the arrangements that were put together for her involved elite musicians that surrounded her vocals with walls of sound, whether guitars, electronics, percussion, strings, you name it. After her first single rocketed to number one and stayed there, she could have any arrangement she wanted, and there was no musician whose services were too expensive.

And I absolutely despised her for it. She got her break because of her name, and she had gotten a rare kind of luck that most people never have. She represented everything that was wrong in pop music, from the glamour to having everything she could have wanted. And here she was, right in front of me, as if taunting me for wasting my time saving her life instead of someone more valuable, more human, than she was.

Her kind was better off not existing.

And her comment, speaking in such a ditzy manner . . . only someone spoiled rotten like her would have the gall to ask whether this was a ZAFT ship. Either that or she was truly stupid.

The anger was churning deep inside me as Natarle asked, stunned, "You're related to Siegal Clyne of the Supreme Council."

Lacus nodded. "Siegal Clyne is my father."

The annoying pink bouncing thing with eyes jumped around her, yelling "Haro" over and over until it was drummed into my skull with the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Lacus giggled as she took it in her hands. "This is my friend Haro. Say hi to everybody, Haro!"

The airy voice. The innocent, snobbish smile on her face. The idealistic, wide-eyed look in her eyes. The long, lavishly cared-for pink hair. And, perhaps the final nail in the coffin I so wanted to prepare for her, was her useless, inane robotic pet-thing that bounced around and made random noises.

I could not stand the sight of such a unnaturally innocent person.

I marched up to her and punched her in the face.

Let's just say nobody took it that well.


I was thrown into the brig immediately. Natarle gave me one look after unceremoniously dumping me in there. "She is the daughter of the Supreme Chairman, Cagalli Yamato! We can't afford for her to be hurt in any way or this war will further escalate! Now stay here until you cool off . . . and when we come back for you, you better have one helluva good reason for your actions."

"I already have one," I snapped. "I hate her sniveling, self-righteous guts."

Natarle rolled her eyes. "I don't like her either, believe me. But punching her in the face could cause wide-reaching consequences. Remember who she is the daughter of. And also remember this: you technically abused a captive, submissive prisoner. That breaks so many humane treatment laws that I don't know where to begin . . ."

She rubbed her forehead. "I'd throw the book at you, but Lieutenant Ramius is in charge, and she'll likely be lenient with you. Now cool the hell off, or stew in your stupid anger, or whatever. We will be back for you."

And then she was gone, leaving me completely alone to focus on my bruises.

I had caused a bit of a scuffle when I had punched Lacus in the face. I think quite a few of the crew members were looking for an excuse to punch me for some time, repressed anger over being protected by a Coordinator. Granted, I had done something incredibly stupid by punching Lacus but you would think your average enlisted EA soldier would cheer such a development more than anything else.

After all, Lacus is the daughter of their enemy's leader, right?

Hours went by, and not so much as a guard walked outside my cell. I guess I was receiving the "isolation" treatment for what I had done. Not even my friends were stopping by for a visit. I'd figure at least Tolle would show up, but maybe they were letting no one pass.

They were probably fussing over Lacus, apologizing profusely. Babying her. The thought of that just pissed me off more than before I punched her. She was probably relishing the attention. Gratified that the Earth Alliance would trip over themselves trying to make her comfortable. All because she is a stupid pop idol and the daughter of the Supreme Chairman, so she absolutely, positively, must not come to harm.

I waited for so long I was beginning to wonder if everyone had forgotten about me. Maybe this was my punishment for taking part in raiding Junius Seven, this imprisonment. Maybe the ghosts had already taken me into their realm, and I was dead, drifting in space, and this was some kind of purgatory. I started feeling the walls, seeing if I could phase through them, or they would warp and bend in impossible ways.

My imagination runs wild when I'm alone. I can't help it. That's the way I am.

Suddenly, I heard footsteps. I ran over to the bars that kept me in my cell and peered through the gaps. I saw two guards, a shorter, stouter one in front, and a tall, lankier one in back, and they seemed to be in-between someone. The shorter guard looked at me funny. I must have seemed like a feral animal locked up for him. Considering my various mental issues and visions over the last couple of days, I don't think I looked fully sane to anybody.

The guard turned around, and behind him, I caught a small amount of very familiar pink hair. "Um, are you sure you want to do this?"

The voice. That godawful voice. "Yes."

"Oh no. Not you," I groaned. Now I wasn't thinking I was in purgatory, I was wondering if I wound up in hell.

Lacus Clyne walked past the shorter guard and looked at me, with strangely sympathetic eyes. "Your captain has granted me permission to meet with you for a short while until I am kept in permanent quarters. I would like to make the most of it, considering she did not have to do that."

"Oh yeah? Why do you want to talk to the girl who punched you?" I asked.

"Because I want to know why you punched me." Lacus' eyes seemed to darken, just a little. I suddenly realized that maybe the ditz act she had was precisely that, an act, and underneath was someone far more intelligent and worldly.

It made me freeze, just for a second, and I finally stepped back. "Fine. Go on."

Lacus nodded. "Thank you very much."

The guards both looked at us weirdly. The tall one said "Uh, ten minutes. That's all you get."

"I will make the most of it, then," Lacus said. The door opened, and I made sure that I didn't look like I was going to pounce on her.

There was a slight red mark on her left cheek, where I had hit her. It seemed indecisive whether to develop into a bruise or not.

She sat on the other side of my cell, and stared at me. "What is your name, soldier?"

I thought about lying, but considering Lacus was a P.O.W. for all practical purposes, I was thinking she would never get to head back to ZAFT and blab about who punched her in the face. A stupid assumption, considering the Archangel was practically behind enemy lines, if such things existed in space, as Artemis no longer existed to protect Earth forces in this sector.

So I told her my real name. "It's Cagalli Yamato, and I'm from the Orb Union's Heliopolis colony. I volunteered to help protect the Archangel until we make it to safety in the wake of Heliopolis' destruction. Destruction you people instigated."

Lacus gave me a sad smile. "I had no knowledge of the operation."

"You're the daughter of the Supreme Chairman. You had to know."

"My father would prefer if I'm not involved and for now, I'm going to respect his wishes." She sighed. "So you are Cagalli Yamato. I shouldn't be surprised. You look like the kind of girl Athrun truly desires."

Seeing Lacus speak so frankly nearly fried my brain. Once I got over it, I managed to form a response. "Athrun's talked about me?"

Lacus nodded solemnly. "He considers you a close friend. In fact, I think he cares about you more than he cares about me."

I could tell that was a sore point with her, just by looking at her face. She wasn't angry or anything, just . . . sad. She had this look that suggested she felt she wasn't good enough, in some unfathomable way, and she didn't want to accept that but had no choice but to.

Hearing Lacus' admission was stunning. I had no idea one simple kiss could have made Athrun long for me so much. It felt kind of creepy, like I had a interplanetary stalker who would follow me everywhere, whether I went to Mars, Jupiter, or as far out as Neptune. Did Athrun know how to let anything go?

I wanted to feel flattered, but in the end I was more unnerved by Lacus' statement than anything else. It made me truly think Athrun was becoming a stalker. And unlike most stalking cases, I wasn't going to be able to file a restraining order to make him go away.

"Really," I finally said, unable to come up with anything that seemed proper.

Lacus nodded. "It's all right. It's a marriage for political convenience. Our fathers are trying to unite the hard-liners and the moderates behind one solid way to conduct the war."

I remembered that Patrick Zala, Athrun's father, was a renowned conservative. Siegel Clyne, ostenibly, was a moderate, but any "moderate" who warmongered as much as his government did was subject for re-interpretation. "I didn't know the ZAFT had anything resembling politics, much less something as antiquated as political marriages."

"We are governed by PLANT," Lacus said. "ZAFT is our military arm."

There it was again, denial of the truth. And I could not stop myself from lashing out. "It's smoke and mirrors, pop princess. ZAFT pretty much governs the PLANTs now, whether you want to admit it or not. The war's turned the government into a military dictatorship in all but name. Your politicians are just figureheads for what the military wants done."

Lacus' solemn smile made me stop. It just had this power, like she understands me better than I understand myself. Like Athrun's overtures towards me, it was creepy. "As long as my father retains the Chairman position, PLANT will never become a shell for a shadow military government. I can promise you that."

"But your father has ordered so many things! What about what you people did on April Fools' Day, remember?"

What I was referencing was the "April Fools' Crisis", as inane as it sounds. On that day, the ZAFT fired a massive neutron jammer into the Earth. It worked like an EMP, shattering communications, but also disabled nuclear power for the most part. Earth has managed to get some communications working, but long-distance phone calls remain a thing of the past, at least for the near future. Nuclear power remains touch and go as well.

Lacus kept that solemn smile. I so wanted to believe she was mocking me, but her eyes were powerful, resonant. It was like she was gazing deep inside me. Not like I was being violated, but like she was trying to make contact with something.

"My father was placating the hard-liners with that move," Lacus said. "It was supposed to show he was in charge, that he is willing to take aggressive steps to end the war. The fact that Earth's casualties would be minimal compared to other methods was a major selling point. But the move didn't help my father at all, it just made the hard-liners hunger for more battle, for more destruction. Some even talk about conquering the Earth, now."

"So you say," I replied.

"You don't have to believe me if you don't want to, Cagalli Yamato. I fully understand your distrust. What happened to your colony must've hurt deeply."

"It was my home," I said. "I was going to college there, and your people ruined my life."

Lacus nodded. "I know. Many lives were ruined. Ended. I noticed you are not the only civilian onboard this ship, either. It seems everyone is working together to keep this ship alive, and strong. I wish my father was able to inspire such unity."

"Isn't that what the marriage is for?" I asked.

"I have no idea if that'll work. It might be just a cynical ploy by Athrun's father to usurp my father. Not that I blame Athrun for it if that turns out to be true. He and his father are very different people."

"Oh yeah?" I asked.

Lacus gave me what seemed to be the first joyful smile since she had stepped onboard the Archangel. "Athrun is an honorable young man, and he treats me well whenever he sees me. He is trying his best to make our relationship work, even with his feelings for you, even with pressure from his father. All he wants to do is the right thing. Just like you."

"How can you assume that about me?" I asked.

Lacus chuckled softly. "You are the only Coordinator onboard this ship, unless I'm mistaken. That means that the Strike GUNDAM that's been giving Athrun's special forces unit so many headaches is being piloted by you."

"Nice deduction," I said.

Lacus' smile turned solemn again. "You are just protecting this ship because you're a good person who knows what you have to do. These civilians, these soldiers, they all need you here. Trust me, anyone who will step into the cockpit of those GUNDAM monsters is a brave person. Athrun's brave, his friends are brave, and youare brave."

"Thanks," I replied, trying to sound as noncommittal as I could.

Lacus stood up. "I believe our time is about up. I would like you to walk me to my room, please."

"Why me?" I asked.

"I feel that I understand you, Cagalli Yamato. Do you understand me? I tried to make my thoughts as clear as I could."

She reached her hand out towards me. "I don't think you want to be locked in this cell anymore, do you?"

I admit it, I didn't hesitate before I took her hand and shook it. "No, I don't."

Lacus nodded. "Good. Thank you for understanding, Cagalli."

The truth was, I was more confused about her than anything else. But I didn't let her know that. I just wanted out of that holding cell, and regardless, I was no longer in the mood to punch Lacus anymore.

Isolation, and Lacus' honesty, has a way of disabling aggression that is something to behold.


When Lacus made it to her room, there was Haro, waiting for her. It bounced up and down. "Lacus, you're back! Lacus, you're back!"

"Yes, Haro. I'm back. And I think I made a new friend," Lacus said, and she picked up Haro and shoved it in front of me.

"You punched Lacus. You punched Lacus. You're mean, you're mean," Haro said.

I felt like turning the robot thing into a metallic baseball, but Lacus just laughed and set the robot down. "Oh, Haro, you always see things so simply."

I would disagree. I don't think Haro sees things at all. He's just a stupid robot pet. But I can't hate him completely. It would be insulting to Tori. Who am I one to talk about robotic pets, I own one myself.

Lacus sighed as she watched Haro jump and down. "You're probably wondering how the daughter of the Supreme Chairman can be captured so easily."

I actually wasn't. "You're not part of the military. If you're floating around in outer space unprotected, and you got attacked or something, that's your own fault."

"So you do know I was attacked."

"Logical deduction. Some Earth Alliance ship probably decided to pick on you."

"Earth ships did," Lacus did, sighing. "We were supposed to be a simple memorial service. But we got damaged and chased into the debris belt. I was put into an escape pod right before the air was completely gone. I don't know if anyone else got on a pod before it was too late."

She looked at me sadly. "I assume that since you didn't collect any more pods, there weren't any to get, were there?"

"I would've detected them," I replied.

"What about the ZAFT pilot who was talking to me? She said she was going to rescue me. That's part of the reason why I thought I was placed onboard a ZAFT ship."

I knew my eyes betrayed me instantly. There's no forgetting something like that, killing someone in cold blood. And this was the first woman I have killed, the first three were men. Four people already, and it hasn't even been a week since this whole ordeal began. And that's not including Commandant Garcia, who I let die, by my own choice.

"I killed her," I said. "She was too close to the ship, to my people. I had to take the shot. If she detected us . . ."

Lacus nodded slowly, sadly. "I see. You made a soldier's decision, then."

"Yes, I did."

"She was a nice person. Professional, but nice. She genuinely cared about my survival. That's all I can ever ask from whoever rescues me," Lacus said softly.

I did not want to know any more about a person who I've killed, so I quickly changed the subject. "I did what I had to do, okay? And that's final."

I walked over to the intercom. "Hit the green button if you want to buzz the bridge, like if you need any food or need to use the restroom. You are not allowed outside. In the meantime, I'm going to protect this ship. And that means I will have to kill more of you people."

Lacus sighed. "You have no interest in joining PLANT?"

"I have given you my position on PLANT. I want to see your father prove that PLANT is more than a front for ZAFT before I believe there's any good about your government at all." I realized I hadn't answered her question directly. "So no, I am not interested. I'm going to head back to Orb, and that's final. Once I've done my duty onboard this ship, I mean."

"I'm glad to hear you say that," Lacus said. "You don't enjoy war, like some of the people I've met. Coordinators are prone to enjoying war, I've noticed. Many of the people have a sense that they're invincible against Naturals, and so view this as a game, an adventure, even a glorified shooting gallery. They sincerely don't think they're killing people. To them, Naturals are little more than scraps of the past, scraps to be eliminated, the modern-day equilvalent to Neanderthals."

"Who are these people?" I asked.

Lacus shook her head. "It doesn't concern you."

"What do you mean, it doesn't concern me?"

"This is an internal PLANT affair and you're wearing an Earth uniform, Cagalli Yamato."

I looked down at my uniform, and realized Lacus' point. I was definitely the enemy, even though she seemed to like me, in some odd way.

"Right," I managed.

"Please, you should leave before people think you're conspiring with me," Lacus said with a slight smile.

"That's crap."

"Some people are willing to believe anything as long as it satisfies their own prejudices," Lacus said.

Lacus' ditzy persona wasn't what was bothering me anymore. It was this sense that she was always right. Why did she have to bring up these points? Everything was simpler when I thought she was stupid. But she was proving a match for my political science education. In hindsight, I shouldn't have been surprised, she is the daughter of the Supreme Chairman, after all. What kind of politician wouldn't thoroughly school his child in, well, political science?

"Yeah," I finally said, and I turned towards the door. "See you later, I guess."

Lacus' voice sounded just a little happier. "Thank you for talking with me. With you, I finally feel like I can be myself. Please stay safe, Cagalli."

"I'll try, I guess," I said, and I opened the door and walked out into the hallway, making sure it was locked from the outside as I exited.

I rested my head against the wall, lost in thought. That was Lacus Clyne, pop idol, and surprisingly adept at political science, a match for me.

I wanted to hate her. She had everything to succeed in life, and she didn't have to deal with prejudice like I did. It made thoughts of defecting to the ZAFT tempting, just for a short moment in time.

But the promises I had made, the friends I had here, they kept me straight. I have to do what I said I will do. Without me, everybody's lives onboard this vessel are forfeit. They will die.

Innocent civilians will die. My friends will die. The soldiers will die. Melanie will die.

Their lives laid in my hands, and I could either protect them or crush them, by the decisions I made.

I made up my mind, then. I was not going back to Athrun. I knew my place, and it was here, prejudice and all.

If Athrun wanted me, he was going to have to come to me, and betray his friends, his father.

And that, like a lot of other things, was final.