I can't imagine why you'd think that.
All right I have a sneaking suspicion that you're not 100% Committed to your Oreo diet. The guidelines are really pretty basic. No excuses, Breakfast is obviously an Oreo granola bar or Oreo Pop Tart. No, they're not gross. Shut up. They're amazing. Lunch should be Oreo pizza with an Oreo milkshake and a couple of those Oreo truffles my mom makes (a.k.a. the most delicious freaking things in the universe). Dinner is deep fried Oreos served on top of ice cream, and for a drink, it's Oreos dissolved in milk. No water. Only Oreo milk. Deseret can be Oreos straight up. Sound reasonable? It's for your health, Blue.
I swear to God, typing this is actually making me hungry, this totally used to happen to me when I was younger. Isn't it funny the way you fantasize about junk food when you were a kid. It's really all-consuming. I guess you have to obsess about something before you know about sex.
-Dr. Jacques
He is perfect. Absolutely perfect.
Jacques,
I really appreciate you looking out for my health. It will be hard but I know my body will thank me. Seriously, I can't argue with the fact that Oreos are extremely delicious, and the menu you described actually sounds amazing. Although, for me, I'll have to leave out the deep fried Oreo dinner. I made the mistake of eating once at a carnival right before going on the Tilt-A-Whirl. I'll spare you the details, but let it be said that people who get nauseated easily have no business riding the Tilt-A-Whirl. I haven't been able to look at a deep fried Oreos the same way since. Sorry to even have to tell you that. I know Oreos are really important to you.
I have to admit I like to imagine you as a kid fantasizing about junk food. I also like to imagine you now fantasizing about sex. I can't believe I just wrote that. I can't believe in hitting send.
-Blue
Him. I would fight for him. I have never really, truly cared about someone before. Not like this. All I know is I need to fight. No matter what it takes or how hard it is. He is worth fighting for.
He is in my dreams. No matter how hard, I can't get him out of my head. I have these dreams of running. I never seem to be able to stop. I am always running towards him, my hands outreached grasping forward trying to reach him. But I can't. I am stuck in an endless loop, never able to truly get him. He has become everything for me. He has completely taken over my subconscious. Over my entire life all of my decisions. Everything I do, I think of him. I want to do better, be better. For him. He has completely consumed my life. Thoughts of him, dreams, ideas. It's all him.
"Hey, are you even paying attention to me?"
Marcus asks snapping me out of my daze.
"Sorry, uh where were we?"
"If you can't even pay attention to me, then you should just leave. I'm not stupid, I can do my own work. I'm not like any of the actual idiots at our school. I don't need tutoring. Your just wasting your time."
"Well your mom hired me, so let's just go back to studying. Okay?"
"Fine."
I am actually starting to hate him. Even though it is good money, I really want to quit. He is imposable to tutor. He doesn't even try. It's exhausting! I hate working with him. I hate every part of it. But Jacques is worth it. If I can stay, and this works. Jacques would be worth all of it. I can get through this. I can deal with Marcus, and my mom being stressed and emotional all the time. I can deal with it all. As long as I still have Jacques.
Oh my God, Blue, I'm so tired my face hurts. For you ever have those random nights where your brain won't shut off, even though your body feels like five hundred pounds of exhausted? I'm just going to email you and I hope that's okay and I know this is probably going to be totally incoherent so you can't judge me, okay? Even if I fuck up my grammar. You're like the best writer, Blue, and normally I try to check everything like three times because I don't want to disappoint you. So sorry in advance for the wreckage with your you're there their they're and everything else.
Today has been pretty freaking great actually. I'm trying not to think about what a zombie I'll be tomorrow. Of course, I have five quizzes in the next two days including one in une autre langue that I at complement.
LE FUCK
So, didn't there used to be a reality show where people had to date each other in pitch darkness? We should totally do that. We should find a room somewhere that's totally dark and then we could hang out and it would be totally anonymous. That wouldn't ruin anything. What do you think?
-Jacques
I can't get him out of my head. He is in everything. Everything reminds me of him, no matter what I do I can't get him out of my mind. My brain is completely consumed with thoughts, ideas, stories. All about him. Even though I have no idea what he looks like, he is already everything to me. I'm already completely indescribably in love with him.
